Watch the moon disappear
Waiting for the new day of fear

Watch the moon come back again
This midnight, this lonely friend

The best one that I have

Watch the Sun set
With hopes and regrets

Watch the Sun rise
Wondering what new surprise

Today will bring

People reckon I'm aggressive
All violence, and hatred
But I just need someone
Someone I can spend some time with

I thought of someone at some stage
But now I write on a new page
It is someone else that I think I love
But I've been wrong before

Yeah I have been wrong before
Oh so wrong before
When the steel flashes
And my blood flooded the floor

With wicked grin
And eyes full of sin
She ripped me apart
And made my head swim

But not this girl
Oh not this one
To me, at least,
She has done no wrong

I trust her
It took a while
To distinguish genuine
From crocodile

But I feel something for her
And no I'm not a *******!

See me? Proud of me?
I've moved on, quite clearly!
I hate the past, I hate it all
How I trusted you and was left to fall!

She is someone else, better than you
I trust her, even with my heart
And I have faith
That she won't knock me on my ***!

**** this, and *******
I'm moving on, I'm done with you!

Yeah I have been wrong before
Oh so wrong before
When the steel flashes
And my blood flooded the floor

But no more,
Oh no more
Now only small drops,
No painful fall!

I will not apologise
For what I thought was right

However, I will apologise
For any and all fright

(Boo. I'm not that scary)

Why not resort to anarchy
To end life's greatest fallacy
That life is worth living
That there is a reason to keep breathing

Death since birth
Born from the destined dead
Like what is there to build on
When the world spins like my head?

They say knowledge is power
But there are two sides to this coin
Remove life from history
Do you get the point?

So burn it all down
Leave this ******* in ashes
And stand atop a hill, watch the fire rise
Like it doesn't matter, bringing lyrics to the masses

Some days I seem to care
Then the next I'm not fully there
And other days,
I'm a little in-between.

When I care,
I am entirely selfless
An angel, if you like
Helping the helpless

When I am not myself
I'm restraining the urge to demolish
To tear lives, buildings, the world down
You could say I'm demonic

And then
When I'm in-between,
Expect the best and worst
Of both versions of me

Why do you harass me?
What did I do to you?
I don't think I deserve this
From Year 8 to now I just kept pushing through

You worked me up quite a bit
Couldn't control myself and I felt like ****
They say try not to let it get to you
But they don't know what it's like to be in my shoes

Take a deep breath and count to ten
I'll be breathing just fine when you swing by your neck
And count to ten? Don't be ridiculous
I'll be counting down if you give me some half-decent explosives

Because I like explosions,
Like the flashing red dots right behind my eyelids
You're my target now, stand centre stage
And see the fear in your eyes as you feel my rage!

I don't sleep much some nights
And if I do, I sleep badly
If there were a pill to cure this then
I would take it gladly

Sitting on this bench with a mask on my face
Wondering why I'm in such a desolate place
The cars rush past, and the traffic lights change
From morning to the afternoon everyday it's the same

Recently it seems
I prefer anonymity
With a skull half-mask in position
And nothing but silence around me

Stuck in my head
The one place that I dread
When thoughts beckon me
And my eyes fail to see

Surrounding me, lies the darkness
So bland yet so beautiful in all its' starkness
If I'm being honest
I prefer to hear the sound rather than silence

Welcome to my life
Where the light reflection from a knife
Can hold me captivated
Ensnares me, holds my gaze
Completely and utterly fixated

Where the flickering flames of fire
Make me want to click the lighter
And make my own little pyre
And watch it at my minds desire

In the midst of night
Where smoke rises in uncertain light
And quells my urge to fight
And encourages my desire to take flight

I can be so easily captivated....
So easily fixated...
Upon the simple things

Surrounding me, lies the darkness
So bland yet so beautiful in all its' starkness
If I'm being honest
I prefer to hear the sound rather than silence

Surrounding me, lies the darkness
So bland yet so beautiful in all its' starkness
If I'm being honest
I prefer to hear the sound rather than
This screaming silence

You know it's CB
From the moment you see me
Can't you tell?
I'm the ******* life of the party

Loud and obnoxious
From rapping to beatboxing
Trust me
You don't wanna hear me sing

This bird doesn't tweet it caws
Calling all peeps to my cause
And the dancers to the floor
If you want more fun then let's drink a little more!

You know it's CB
From the moment you see me
Can't you tell?
I'm the mother-******* life of the party!

"At least I have a girlfriend...."
everyone laughs

Yeah I may be going solo
Here's something you should know, though
I had a girlfriend once too
But now I am on my own

"I bet you think you're so hard
Did she get rid of you?
Did you dump her?
Was it because you're a ******
And have nothing better to do?"

everyone laughs again

Nah, I am not *******
I just extinguished the fire I started
Because the stress was killing me
I may be cold sometimes,
But I ain't no beast

I've got a heart too, I guess
Though I wouldn't mind if you were laid to rest
Because if these insults are some form of test
The only thing you're wasting is your breath

"Nah, I'm just showing how much better I am
And how having a girlfriend makes me a man"

Last time I checked, to be a man,
You didn't need
A girl to beat
Do you understand?

"Aw, ******* ****
You're just being a *****
Why don't you just bend over
And go **** on someone's' ****"

A few people shake their heads

I just said I had a girlfriend
What, because I'm single means I'm suddenly gay?
Tell you what mate, I still like girls
Oh, and by the way...

If you don't beat your girlfriend
Why is her face all cuts and bruises?
Did you do it because you're a "man?"
I really hate you losers

Hit a girl for no reason
"Awww it's coz I'm tough"
impersonates drunk, gets a few laughs
It's pronounced "girl" not "punching bag"
Do you want to know what's rough?

"No, what's rough"
Drunken man takes a swing, misses

"My fist"

If I could just have honesty
I wouldn't need apologies
You wouldn't need to waste more breath
And wouldn't have my hostility

When all you do is lie
It's like it's your favourite past-time
Your lips are thin and you lie right through
Your teeth and I'm so done with you!

I'm sick of trying to find the truth
When you lie so much and really let loose
Your lips just flap and air rushes out
Of that horrendous hole you call a mouth!

I'd like to close it with my fist
Because you're just so ******* ignorant
You are so much like  Donald Trump
You just talk **** and preach your innocence!

Why does it always end this way?
All I wanted was for you to stay
What I didn't even realize
Is how ****** up I must've been in your eyes

Coming back to you with yet another problem
Thinking you could probably help me solve them
Didn't know I was just unloading pain
What is one's loss is another's' gain

And I'm sorry for giving you what I couldn't deal with
I wish I could say I was innocent
I meant you no harm yet I still gave it to you
Now all I can do is hope you pull through

I wanna be by your side again
Laugh like we did when we were friends
Make lame-*** jokes and laugh along
Or sit and listen to our favourite songs.

I'll say it again,
Without end
I'm so so so sorry...
I didn't mean to hurt you...

Often I wonder how I would die
Despite knowing I could
I couldn't go any further than try

So I thought I'd rebel
Against those who suppressed me
Knowing if I do I'm viable for Hell
Eliminate those who wish to best me
Test me
Contesting
Everything I held dear in life

Target my family
And you're on my hit list
**** with my friends
And my arrows won't miss

My last show of defiance
To break an uneasy alliance
With people I gave a second chance
Who just let it fly past

Like ***** I don't hand these out freely
You must be insane to dis this completely
Turning my olive branch into a mockery
Well I can draw a sword and cut you up like piece of meat

So I figure when I eventually kick the bucket
I'll mess with the "best" to the point that they just say "**** it"
And decide not to hurt anyone ever again
When they are six feet under due to long-time tradition

And when I decide it's time
I'll get myself something prime
Perhaps a strong drink with a splash of lime
And with a handful of pills sever my lifeline

beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

But not any time soon,
It's still morning not noon
And I do not wish
For tears to storm like a monsoon

Hatred and pain are such strong motivators
Stabbing pain like the jaws of alligators
I'm not the best with words, so don't try debate this
Coz I'm feeling so high, so ******* elated

Hands curled and heavy breathing
Pain and bloodlust are all I'm feeling
My eyes dark holes where darkness is bleeding
And all my sanity is ******* receding

Are you receiving?
Are you still needing?
Wanting
The end of all my hatred and pain,
All those days that I had nothing to gain
So I acted with no shame,
Ripping hearts
And tearing body parts
Out of a need
To be seen
Clearly
As what hides underneath
The monster free
Like a sword from a sheath

Hatred keeps me going strong
Pain makes blood fall
And my heart stall
First rule
Of the emotions
Is hatred is used in locomotion
And pain is what stops you,
A paralysing potion
That ends your motion

Stops your momentum
Completely
and then some
Trying to defeat me
Secretly
You just want me to fight back,
You want a piece of me?

Come get some
Once it starts it stops when I am done
Shred you up just for fun
Lusting for blood and adrenaline runs

Hatred and Pain
Day after day
Pulsing my temple
Making my head sway

But I enjoy it for the power
That allows me to devour
Those who try to speak louder
Talk **** and now a blood shower

Boom

Walking through our midst
A pretender, full of ignorance
She cuts and she bleeds
And she likes to scream
But compared to real agony
It's like she's singing

And we all know that
Silence
And violence
Go hand in hand
And she preaches
What she doesn't understand

And we know
Oh yeah we know
She's just a pretender

You talk like you know what you're about
But the reason you do it leaves no doubt
In our minds
That you're secretly a spy
Working through
Enemy lines, and we all know that

Silence
And violence
Go hand in hand
And she preaches
What she doesn't understand
It's like it's a trend or her favourite band
As she smiles at the cuts all on her hand

Mine were done out of endless pain
The sort that you feel when you've nothing to gain
The meaninglessness of each passing day
And you hope that your blood will wash it away

We see the scars, all up your leg
When you pull your shorts up and it's like you beg
For attention, the sort that we don't seek
We rarely let loved ones have a peek
We hide in the dark, not in the limelight
You're after attention and you've found the wrong type

Because we know...
Oh yes we know....

Silence
And violence
Go hand in hand
And she preaches
What she doesn't understand
Self-harming whilst humming to her favourite band
You try to fit in but you don't understand

It's for the pain
When you've nothing left to gain
And your mind hurts too much
And life is a crutch
Blood loss brings us back to life
Whilst it drips
From the tips
Of our knife...

Silence
And violence
Go hand in hand
Here is a song that you might understand
Whilst I write this alone, with no back-up band
It's been written just as I planned
For you
And hopefully you'll understand
Why we do
What we do

why is it like this
I don't understand
I gave my trust
Never my lust
But you slapped away my hand

"WHY IS IT LIKE THIS
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
I GAVE MY HEART
YOU RIPPED IT APART"

And now time ticks in grains of sand
Until I fall into the void
Where my soul will be destroyed
And I become a mindless droid

Perhaps I was right
And I had done no wrong
Perhaps you knew it too
And were just playing all along

Perhaps I was wrong
And perhaps you were right
But if so, why can't I see it?
Is it hidden from the light?

I sought out an answer
Frustration at failure hardened my heart
I couldn't find one, no matter what
I lined up the sight but missed the mark

So tell me, if you are right
Where it is that I ****** up
Because this **** is giving me headaches
And simply put, I've had enough

You lie with a straight face
You are honest with a suspicious look
I can tell the difference
You are like an open book

Yet everyone believes you
And no-one trusts me
They see the straight face and believe
For they only believe what they can see

They like to see the evidence
Because they cannot hear the truth
They do one and not both
Now I don't mean to be rude

But why is everyone so blind?
Why can they not see?
That you are a treacherous spider
Oh what tangled webs you weave!

A soldier he was
But soldier no more
Twenty years or so
A veteran of war

Afghanistan, Hawaii, East Timor
A soldier of war
A soldier of war

Bringing back souvenirs
Another scar, another day
Where everyone was frontline
And they suffered the pain

He came home again
But everything had changed
The person he could've been
His choices had rearranged.

I sat and spoke with him
When I ran away from home
Just me and him, in the park
On the grass and together alone.

He apologised for not being there
When I needed him most
First time I've ever really seen him cry
Hard for him to compose

He held out my hands
"Did you think you were given a ***?
Of anger, that's all you'll get in life?"
He looked me in the eyes, his own watering a lot

He looks away, sniffles a bit
"I found out the hard way"
And as he does, I see his pain
From twenty years ago to this very day

Afghanistan, Hawaii, East Timor and beyond
My own father
My own father
A veteran of war

You sick ****
1v1 me scrub
burn outs on ya face bruh
Need for Speed
Dope

When doubt creeps
And you cannot sleep
I will calm you
With a tale of serenity

"Control is essential"
Yet my foot is still pressed firmly
On the accelerator
"Hey look Mum, no hands!"
Just let the wheel control itself every now and then

It's fun.

A broken soul, a slight shake
A piece missing, she would soon take
Become whole again, need and be needed
And to this concept she has conceded

Set on someone as broken as she
And be the very best that she can be
Her heart demands it, her mind commands it,
And together they continue to plea

Cherry blossoms fall
Scattering petals across the pond
They drift a little,
Spin a little,
Land and correct course
Setting sail with the wind.

A girl and a boy meet
At a club
Dancing all night
Whilst the cherry blossoms fall
And sail under the moon

They cross the bridge near the pond
Watch as the petals fall
A foreshadowing from nature
So obvious, if you know where to look

But they were blind.

They grew up together,
Married at the age of 27
As the petals scattered.


Years down the track...


A drunken man, a ******* girl
A divorce so imminent
The tears fall as the anger rages
The petals the only evidence.

That something, some force knew,
They were never meant to be

And they turn their backs and set sail
As the wind continues to blow
On opposite paths they will walk
And the petals fall under the moonlit glow

Drop and give me twenty reasons
Why you shouldn't die

Drop dead and give me twenty more
For each and every lie

A gravestone awaits you
It even has your name
"Rest in Peace
You *******
For playing me like a game"

You are my one and only,
Stay with me when I'm lonely
I like that you like me
But there's a part of me, you shouldn't see

When night comes around, I cannot sleep
I'd rather watch the stars then be counting sheep
The night makes my heart leap
Accelerating my heart beat

I am pure, at night alone
No-one near, don't use my phone
So don't try to text me
Coz I'm possessed
By the night
And it feels so right
To be alone

When day breaks, something changes
My mindset, rearranges
And I can't stand to be by myself
I'd rather be with someone else

And that someone,
Is you
<3

Stop this madness
You're giving me your sadness
Don't wanna be like this
Coz anything could happen

Look up at the stars
Hearing wind and honking cars
I don't know where I should start
But this is tearing me apart

So I speak to be heard
These problems I don't deserve
I don't live only to serve
I don't want you to transfer

What I left behind last year
Don't look back and show no fear
My mind just clicks into gear
This is something you should hear

My Father told me about girls
And how their emotions swirl
How they cause drama and unfurl
The flag that glimmers like a pearl

Telling you to go away
Whether or not you wanna stay
It's a twisted form of play
They do on guys for days and days

Now I'm not saying girls are all exactly the same
If they were, well I guess that'd be pretty lame
I know I cannot possibly lay the blame
On the ones who don't actually like to play this game

But don't you dare transfer
To me another world of hurt
I've dealt with one, and I don't yearn
For the past life that I let burn

And as I watched the smoke rise
With flames reaching to touch the sky
I swore to myself I would not die
To the pain a girl can leave behind

In life,
We have many friends
Over the years

We all have friends
But we stand alone
In life,
You are on your own

So don't live anyone else's life
But your own

You only get one shot before it's gone

Don't poke the Bear
For the Bear is easy to anger

Don't poke the Wolf
For the Wolf has his way and not yours

Don't poke the Phoenix
You will burn your hand in the flames of Revenge

Don't touch anyone at all
Just f_ck off

When your resolve fails you,
And your strength leaves you,
I will neither fail nor leave
And help you to carry on.

Yes then no
High then low
Changing my mind
All the time

I argue with myself,
Only it's not really me
I am a double-edged sword
The other no-one can see

Both edges are sharp
But which is false?
Which is true?
What triggers my impulse?

To talk to myself
In my head or out loud
One side of me is embarrassed
Yet the other is proud

My mood swings like schizophrenia
Two completely different people
You couldn't see the other
Even if we were see-through

Twisted and malfunctioning
Dark when it is light
Cloud cover hides the Sun
And unveils the moon by night

Didn't wanna be a demon
Thought I could defeat him
But it turns out I am bleeding
Numbness replacing feeling

Feeling nothing in my core
An empty chasm, nothing in store
From me violence waits to pour
And make some bodies hit the floor

Ripped up, no heart
Tearing lives and souls apart
I knew deep down from the very start
I wouldn't win, I can't outsmart

What is a full part of me
Must be
My destiny
I just don't want to see
Me drag down friends and enemies
I don't want them to condemn me
To some ****** up kamikaze!

But I know I've lost
These bones ache and my mind rots
I'm seeing pulsing black and red dots
Violence awakes, now my soul is frost

With an all-consuming fire,
He pulls out his lighter.
A little flame of hope
For a hopeless little pyro

Don't fight me,
It's not worth it
To be put down so easy
After thinking you're top ****

I am so violent,
More so when silent,
Trust me you don't want pain that you'll feel
For days and days

Moon is up, Sun is down
In the dark of night my sanity drowns
Now a smile, was a frown
So giddy with freedom I laugh like a clown

Rip you up, bleed you out
Your body so dry like a summer's drought
I drink the pain of my victim
With razor blades that I inflict and

With a patience born from bloodlust
I'll shred you up and destroy our trust!

Don't fight me,
It's not worth it
To be put down so easy
After thinking you're top ****

I am so violent,
More so when silent,
Trust me you don't want pain that you'll feel
For days and days

Light and dark, two different sides
Like the division I have inside
From one to another, so easy to slide
So when you see me enjoy the ride!

I don't want to hurt you
Yet at the same time I so want to
I want you to run away
And stand and fight, show me your moves!

I think we should talk about this
(I really want to fight)
Because fighting seems so wrong
(Yet at the same time so right!)

Don't fight me,
It's not worth it
To be put down so easy
After thinking you're top ****

I am so violent,
More so when silent,
Trust me you don't want pain that you'll feel
For days and days

I think you should run away
Before the light starts to fade
Because the moment it hits night
*You'll wish you were outta sight

As the world heaves and crashes around you
Can you keep your feet?
Will you balance, as flexible as a willow
Or suffer painful defeat?

When the ground quakes
And you've got the shakes
From memories, so bittersweet
Can you keep your feet?

As the ocean roars
And dams leak
When hurricanes rage
And floorboards squeak

Can you keep your feet?

When others talk behind your back
Ambush with ferocious attack
Will you have the courage to speak?
Will you be able to keep your feet?

You siphon the blood from my heart
As I collapse, it falls apart
And I fall for you

A Tribute to Boof, the Inside Dog of us Blatchfords
You lived your life
As best you could
But time was ticking,
Ticking away
We knew it would arrive
Just not so soon
We heard the ticking
Each and every day

You may be gone,
But will never be forgotten
Because right from the very start
You wormed your way into our heart

A sad, lonely song
A violin thrumming across the strings
Fresh night air,
Stars hanging in the sky,
In fire and beauty
Shining across space

A slight breeze blowing
Ruffling hair,
With sighing sound

Gazing up at the stars,
Watching the world spin
Under the light
Of a full moon.

Life couldn't be
More real
More there
Or more
Perfect

It's the little things
That have the biggest impact
And the larger things
That everyone fixates
*Why can't you see the real problem?