When did numbers lose meaning?
When fifty-thousand started feeling small and
two million start feeling just right-
when one million is just the start and
infinity is the cusp of the end
the rim of a glass
too deep to drink yourself out of.
When did 10 feel small?
When we’re told at age 9 that
there’s numbers far greater than just “ten”
one-hundred, one-thousand, one hundred thousand,
the list goes on and on
so maybe that’s why 10 feels
When did numbers lose meaning?
Perhaps it was the moment
when we grow past single digits
learn of the world and its numbers;
crunched under the weight of
a billion numbered souls.
Has anyone else felt like the older you get, the smaller otherwise big numbers feel?
While staring at the
Large, black abyss full of stars,
You tend to feel small
It starts small.
Then it grows.
It turns into actions.
Not to others but to yourself.
The lines start small,
Almost to faint to notice.
Then , they grow.
They begin to deepen,
In hopes of drowning out the pain.
The pain of everyday life.
But not as much as your heart does.
It starts small,
As a thought.
But as it grows,
As it struggles to keep up with your flooding emotions.
It begins to strangle you.
The thoughts begin to hurt.
, but what if We don’t want to hear them.
The thoughts that start those lines.
The thoughts that starve us.
The thoughts that deprive us of living a fufilled life.
For anyone feeling the same way I am here
The Standard Model is full of sticky, quirky Quarks,
perky little Fermions, and the Boson Higgs,
the reigning King of Mass of towering might;
who, by spontaneously falling off in any old direction,
gives ad hoc Masses to nearly all, and to all a birthright.
And for all normal matter in creation,
the Boson Higgs is the physicist's salvation.
Alas, we could have learned more,
but a Weasel ate through the Collider core.
Commentary on the Standard Model of Particle Physics.
Commemorates the 2015 shutdown due to animal intrusion.
my world is large
Monsters thrive on all grounds
across the whole globe
erasing the trace of my past
erasing the path to my future
i may be small
but i require vastness to thrive
i don't get the chance to thrive
these Monsters are Humans
They destroy my home
and destroy my hopes of living
i'm just a tiny insignificant butterfly
i have no ability to fight
but the battle has already been lost
i'll die along with the rest of nature
as hope which developed in a cocoon
flies away like a butterfly - myself
I should be combating
no one else but you
for who can tolerate an
arrogant tyrant man like you
sea and sky eyed
love of my life is what you are
your many defects
all your flaws are way so many
you hurt me precious love
not even you can count
You are just like Jack for Rose in Titanic, worse then Rhett for Scarlett in Gone With the Wind
at least Rhett asked that blind, past life beauty me,
to marry him with passion in kiss
You wanted me to cry of jealousy to earn my diamond ring and beg you to marry me
like treating me like garbage
leaving me behind in need
would earn you me
for submissive wife all yours
You act more like a spoiled brat capricious child than a grown up man day in and day out
You must always all the time
Be the great conquistador
you always want to be
the winner one
You are the most selfish
and bully man
I have ever known to adore
But one fantastic thing about you
Erases all your selfish arrogances
all at once I want no other lover no other man but you you
When at the right moment
You are able to become this other outworldly other gentleman!
and I fall love with you
mad passionate ever lover mine
You transform you are the best
crazy lover in the world
And In an instant dear beloved
You mature you get tall
an all grown-up handsome man
You get biger then larger is
and just so huge in my arms
There you see there is
this other you I adore
you make me madly
so madly in love with you I am
You make me crazy and a fool for you over and over
You make me sweat you make me sing and in your arms
i drip i do I do
I get drenched in sweat by you
I cry through every pore with exstasy's joy under you Ruby ivory mine that you are
some often times
you shatter me with one look
and I am put together back instantly as one, and hole again
with just one kiss
a whole new me work of art
in your arms I become
impossible to remember any sorrows past or troubles new
you have ever put me through
eons back twin soul love true
I see how all my friends are loved they seem placid and
calmer with content with their mates than I am in public view
They do not argue or constantly disagree nor fight like you
force me so often to do
They receive gifts and red roses
For their anniversary
and birthdays are a gathering
of simple bliss and joy
Their man always say "yes" to them pleasing them in All
so I tell them I am gold to you
That no favours are denied
no birthing task ever too hard
to grant my man still I cry
They never have constant disagrements convinced
every couple enjoys simple pleasures like they do
and honored by their man
They just seem to ever thrive
Instead take good look at us always fighting through it all
a clown circus event our life is
the life you give me and yet anchored to my heart forever
you remain sweety pie
While you you come and go
faithfully pounding you wave
you give me hope you are my star I drown in tears
with jealousy for you in another
you tos me up your wildest ancient waves rip me apart
you are life to me and you are death
All our days wild days of war
I wouldn't change them though
For I am as you want me to be
Alive in your arms only I am
I survive a neglected pet
tasting only crumbs your
passionate love I do forever miss
I am dead in every other place
I hate you, then I love you,
I hate you love you I adore you
Don't ever leave me to die
Transform my grown up man
get big larger and huge
like only you can do!
You make me feel so alife
then I love you, then I hate you, then I love you all over again,
Don't ever leave me behind
I want no other man but you
You are in my arms such
giant ever green that I adore
As only you can transform
in an instant from big to large
Be grande grande grande
mi amor lay with me I love you
Take my breath away
only you I want I adore only you
I bridge the gap wailing I wait?
Be my grande grande amor
my huge ever
my sad reality.
A great lover erases all tribulations heals the soul mind heart sealing it with a kiss or with a night of mad passionate love making like Rhett took to Scarlett up the stairs in her RED gownl oved by Rhett like never before a bitter unrequieted love unleashed sometimes taking a lover by surprise is the best cure for
unrequieted love to apeace.
large letters on the page of words I've used.
it doesn't account for repetition.
it doesn't account for context
I'm a little peeved.
Deemed to have value,
Shown to show some semblance,
Of sedentary Solitude,
Deemed to be to unseemly,
For the world at large.
It takes a lot of time and energy,
to spin a web strong enough to hold dreams.
22:00 - 30-08-17
State of mind: calm; tired.
Perspectives: philosophical; spiritual; structural; natural.
Thoughts: from thinking - that the capacity for knowledge is only as great as the structure that has been build to contain it. A web is a good metaphor because it is a framework on which things are caught. If a bird flies into a small web, it passes straight through it. A great mind will catch great ideas because that is what it has been developed to do.
Questions: What happens to a person when they challenge themselves to become familiar with what they have an aversion for?