Our joy sneaks up on us like some gorgeous, wild, and untamed creature,
waiting in the shadows until we remember to invite it in.

-Rhia Clay

I looked into your eyes, and never before had I loved someone's darkness as much as their light.
I knew that you would be my undoing, and that I would be yours.

-Rhia Clay

Sometimes after a long battle,
all you long for is soft.
Soft embraces, soft hands, and soft words.

-Rhia Clay

I remember kindness.  
I remember love.  
I remember grace so pure that it blinded me like the sun.  
I will carry that with me always.  
I will shield it like the light within me, a light that grows each time I rise above the ugliness I have known.  
Every time I choose life, I remember you.  
Every time I choose to care for myself instead of letting this world make me feel unworthy of love, I remember.  
Thank you for all the love you poured into me and for being a light during my storms.  
I remember…

-Rhia Clay

She observed the eagles gliding gracefully in flawless circles around her.
Up here on the mountaintop, the wind was her companion.
It murmured gently to her, "breathe deeply, it's time to live again."

-Rhia Clay

The butter melts onto the hot iron pan, sizzling and popping like a firework.
Each motion is a release, a kind of 'lacher prise,' as the French would say.
My heart warms with the love infused into every spice.
Just one carefully measured dash and the dish is just right.
In a kind of enchantment, I practice the art of cooking, laying my heart bare onto the heated metal.
I move swiftly and gently, letting the days worries settle.
I twirl and sway in the act of creation; little compares to the moment of elation.
My spirit hums softly, keeping me in good spirits and laughter as the light gradually dims in my kitchen and the day quietly slips away.
Here in my element, nothing seems to stand in my way.
Thoughts begin to pour forth effortlessly as each dish is polished and stored with care.
Here in the quiet and peaceful moment, I can hope, I can dare.
A touch of kitchen magic has gently enveloped my mind in bliss.
Embracing the elements to set my mind free, grounding me while releasing the tension, allowing me to simply--be.

-Rhia Clay

That moment when your strength gives out and God's strength begins.  
There are not enough words to describe that beauty.
There are not enough words to call it by name.
That moment when Jesus sits with you as you hold your pain in your hands,
and you give it to him,
because it's heavy.  
And you feel the love fill your heart so full you think surely your heart cannot contain it.
That's love.
That's the only name I can give it that feels right.

-Rhia Clay

I wouldn't exchange a single moment or alter a second in the challenging universe of existence, for in surviving all those hard times, I discovered how to truly appreciate life.
Some of the happiest among us have braved the darkest nights, but darling, we know how to live; our scars shine oh so bright..

-Rhia Clay

Life is a beautiful emotional symphony.
A tapestry of exquisitely arranged chords of truth,
melodies of blue.
All orchestrated and arranged in a stunning range of love,
and a lasting stanza, encompassing all that is unknown..
I hope your melody walks with you gracefully all your life.
May it softly serenade you when you believe all hope has vanished,
and offer you healing, always remaining by your side,
whispering to you endlessly, from dusk till dawn.

-Rhia Clay

Pain poured from my being, dripping from my fingertips like blood. Emotion scaled the walls and crept into my heart like a silent scream.
My heart beat inside my mind, its pace quickening, and my senses heightened.
My body felt the ache of the war that tore through me.
I am still healing from the battles this world has ****** upon me.
My body feels like a war zone.
I gasp through the tremors of pain, night terrors clinging to my sheets.
My jaw is tight from clenching; pain is a constant, and I am still here.
I am still fighting.

-Rhia Clay

Her heart was awakening.
The bonds that held her were loosening, one by one.
Her mind was stretching, reaching back through time.
Her heart hungered again.
Hungered for life after death.
And from her ashes, she rose.
Emerging from her former self.
Rising out of the world, which sought to hold her beauty under glass.
She was breaking free from her own confines, no longer content to view the world from the safety of her fortress.  
Her passion for life burned brightly, lighting the way ahead, reignited from within.

-Rhia Clay

I don’t have many words today, as the day’s work has worn me down. Instead, I possess a quiet but firm resolve. Softly, under my breath, I whisper “Jesus,” and for now, this is enough...

-Rhia Clay

I said that we were done, and that all ties between us had been severed.
Yet, my body betrays me, for I trace your heart in my sleep, as I cannot forget its shape...

-Rhia Clay

The melodic chirping of crickets filled the air, while the hum of passing engines blended with nature, creating a meditative atmosphere of their own.
She lay there, observing as Mother Nature, the magnificent artist she is, crafted a tapestry of darkness, transitioning day into night.
She drifted in and out of sleep.
In that beautiful, dream-like state,
where one feels suspended between two worlds.
Caught in the liminal space.
The wind caressed her face, and she embraced its gentle touch.
The day had been lengthy, wearing her down.
Still, the night offered its serenity,
and she wrapped herself in it,
finding her solace in its song.

-Rhia Clay

A spiritual journey is funny.
Just when you think you've lost, you've actually won.
Not because you gave up, but because you learned to let go...

-Rhia Clay

As the 4th of July approaches, people prepare their fireworks and barbecues.
They emerge from their cozy corners, their towns and homes.
All getting ready for the festivities, their eyes sparkling with the anticipation of joy and relaxation.
I look up at my colorful banners and blue balloons, gently swaying in the breeze.
I shut my eyes and breathe in the aroma of barbecued meat mingled with a trace of smoke drifting from a nearby restaurant.
A sense of peace washes over me, accompanied by a bittersweet feeling as I remember a loved one who left this world on this American holiday.
It was 1997, and I was merely ten years old when the man I called my father took his final breath. I was just a child, and my world shattered into pieces as I watched him fight. I felt powerless to change the course of events, understanding that nothing could hold his spirit back from departing this life.
My tiny hands and aching heart were unable to save him.
Yet his compassion lives on in this world and within me. His love remains unforgotten.
Through my father, I experienced a love that was unconditional, and I carry that in my heart with affection and remembrance. I treasure our moments together and cling to the belief that our souls will reunite.
May these words find you in heaven until I can reach you.

-Rhia Clay

"My God, I think, how are you healing me with only a smile?"
My heart breaks in the most beautiful way because you speak a thousand kind words, with only your smile....

-Rhia Clay

I'm trying so hard to be gentle with myself.
I offer endless compassion and grace to everyone else.
Why is it so hard to show myself the same?
I wish to know the answer to the question,
to call it by name.
I know that the trauma I've endured plays a large role.
Too many years of feeling that my voice my silenced.
What was the price of my compliance?
Too much exploitation in corporate America.
Too much has been taken without being repaid, all in effort to make another dollar,
to survive another day.
Too many words were lost in the pursuit of it all, and now I struggle to save those words on paper, a portrait of words.
Still, little by little, I am climbing out of myself, reaching a metamorphosis with a pen.
Slowly but surely,
I am starting to believe again.

-Rhia Clay

Come, sit by my side,
tell me of the dreams this world has yet to break.
Honestly, tell me your fears,
and I will try to offer you my hope.

-Rhia Clay

Take me somewhere slow and easy.
Take me somewhere where the pain can’t be felt through the waves as they crash against the shore.
Take me somewhere where the skies are so blue that their brilliant hues can bind the hurt.
Take me somewhere where the pressure of life doesn’t consume me, as the music lulls and keeps anxiety at bay.
Take me somewhere where I’m not expected to bind my joy to pay the people’s currency.
Take me to a place where life is gentler, where the wind caresses my face and the sun warms my days.
Please take me away from here.
I’ll find my peace on the horizon, out on the open highway.
It’ll find me as the moon lays its song on me, soft lullabies for a weary heart.
And I’ll be okay, I promise, once I leave this place.
I’ll leave the pain and all the damage here.
I’ll lay it down for good, all that this town has put me through.
All the tears and tired souls with plastic hearts and stone faces.
Take me somewhere where the air is crisp and clean, and I’ll breathe easier as I lean into the breeze.
Take me somewhere slow and easy.
Anywhere but here…

-Rhia Clay

In my days and nights, I seek you, Lord, with all my might.
I trust in you, and even when my trust wavers, yours never does.
I reach for you, and I never stop searching for you.
I search every cell within me for you and seek to spread your kindness.
Long ago, when my mortal mind gave in and sank beneath the waves, you carried me above them, breathing life back into tired lungs.
If you search my depths, you will find that all things beautiful and good stem from you.
When I am unable to let go, I remember the trust I have in you.
I trust you when I don’t understand how I will survive, how you will make a way for me.
I am forever your child, looking for shelter under your wings.
I am your daughter, looking to honor her king.

-Rhia Clay

Getting lost, and living solely for achievements, is no way to live.
What is next on the list of things to achieve?
Will it ever be enough?

-Rhia Clay

Calm yourself, dear soul;  
the difficult times do not last forever.  
Everything comes to an end,  
and sometimes an ending is simply the universe's way of giving you time to recognize that your path is shifting.  
The direction you take will ultimately lead you home.  
Embrace the shift and listen closely to its whispers.  
Just as you can hear the echo of wisdom within a seashell you’ve picked up from the shore,  
you too can hear this guidance if you quiet your mind and soul enough to listen.

-Rhia Clay

I have news for you,
even when you think you're failing,
you're actually winning.
Because if you're failing,
that means that you're still in the game.
If you're still fighting,
they haven't won.
Whoever "they" are to you,
don't let them win.
Stay in the game.

-Rhia Clay

Among all my life’s accomplishments, my most significant triumph is simply being here, continuing to fight, and holding onto hope.
I exist in both fear and joy, and within this duality lies an immeasurable strength.
I look up at the stars that carry my memories, and I firmly believe, endlessly, that I can still discover my path back home.
I gaze into the water, watching the silent and gentle ripples dance around me, and I realize that my spirit is still in the process of healing, still enveloping me, my faith, intricately weaving patterns in my thoughts, flowing and revitalizing my very essence.
This is the exact place where God guided me to listen to his voice, to find peace in his presence, and to be reassured that he is alive and breathing for me, infusing life into me, allowing my being to mend.

-Rhia Clay

This is the essence of fear.
It is weak, it is not holy.
While fear is natural, and there is no shame in feeling it,
it is not strong.
It whispers to us in the dark and hides its face in the light.
Nothing holy shrouds itself in disgrace when illuminated by the light.
This is the reason why Satan and his cunning whispers of fear flee in the presence of God,
because they do not belong where God treads.

-Rhia Clay

You craved suffering.
You attempted to stab my flesh while persuading me that you were a thorny rose.
Roses can indeed draw blood, yet they also possess beauty.
Your spirit thrives in shadows, and beauty has faded from your sight.
The tall grass murmurs your falsehoods, and the breeze spreads your treacherous ways.
I have left the stage, no longer willing to engage in your games.
My spirit is devoted to the light, while you, my dear, are destined for the night.

-Rhia Clay

Once you taste freedom, once its beauty has settled in your heart,
you will battle with the intensity of a whole legion to protect it.
Among all treasures, liberty reigns supreme.
The freedom to love as one desires.
The freedom to love whomever one chooses.
The freedom to express oneself.
How can one genuinely love another without the liberty to do so?
For a soul brimming with determination and independence,
take away from me my freedom,
and you may as well deny me breath.

-Rhia Clay