A (b)old
heart **(l)ds
more courag(e)
and (s)atiates
more mind(s)
(e)ager
for knowle(d)ge

Your kisses
are snowflakes
that fall on my skin
like delicate lace
and slowly melt
as my passion
heats
for
more

I fall
and
f
a
l
l

d
e
e
p
e
r

into an

a        b    
     y
s          s

every time
till it
became
  
  /////\\         
|HOME |

I asked time to pause
when our breathes
were jousting
millimeters away

I asked time to pause
when you landed your lips
on mine, warming the cold
chaps of distance

I asked time to pause
when you cupped my face
instilling all sense of
security with 3 words
"i am here"

It's funny
that inspiration
only knocks on
the doors of your mind
in times of heartache
in times of heartbeats
but never
in times of peace
... and as twisted as it sounds
I like that

Dawn cannot dawn sooner
with you

Now I know why I see the moon
linger till the early morn

Emotional sadism
has seduced me
time and time again
to fall for the pain
that still makes me
feel
leading me to
let go of all things selfish
and attach myself
to the "selfless"

F
  a
l
  l
by all means do
Enjoy the chemical  
i        b     l         n            e
   m      a      a            c              s

I am a sealed
envelope
licked by
past promises
that have found
a home
in the corners
of my frame
Go on
cut it open
liberate me
I dare you

In the currency of emotions
heart break and
heart gain
always
lead
to
c
h
a
n
g
e

Even the birds
asked me why
I am not using
my wings

What goes on inside my head
is too sinful for my mouth to speak

What slithers between my neurons
is too dangerous for my tongue to taste

What burns between my nerves
is too fiery for my fingertips to feel

What happens behind my eyes
is too insane for my logic to fathom

What hides behind my smile
is too broad for me to elaborate

What nestles behind every tear
is too salty for the sweet part of me

What rattles behind closed doors
is too rated for my halo to carry

What aches under my skin
is too much for my body to harness

What reddens my lips
is too much for my lovers to taste

What you see today
darling
is but a
taste of
what's underneath

There is nothing
more beautiful
than the crisp kisses
of autumn breezes
slowly making their way
past your curtains
to cover your sun-kissed
body with
a taste of
what's to come
kissing your skin
with slight chilly sensations
leaving goosebumps
behind ....

What happened to you?
You were as strong as a granite rock
full of cracks, sparkly corners
yet strong and dense

What happened to you?
your heart was the therapist for others
immune to unexpected skipped beats

What happened to you?
You had it all planned
the blueprint, the 3D module
even the prize at the end

What happened to you?
You never needed anyone
you never cared

What happened to you?
You loved how big your bed was
versus how empty it is now

What happened to you?
You embraced your determination
then suddenly got sidetracked
by a passerby

What happened to you?
You learned the art of seduction
and heartbreak and inflicted it
now what?

What happened to you?
is the feeling of being alone haunting you?
is age creeping up on you like a perverted
murderer
wanting to slice years off of your life
without you even noticing?

What’s going on?
is this what you want to do?
stand up, from that chair of yours
grab your bag, take a step towards the door
and look back
marvel at that empty chair
and praise your God that it won’t ****
the life
out of
you

Get
out
while you
Still
Can

It's not my fault
if I left a burning flame
in your heart
and tattooed
memories in your mind

There must have been something
to them, to us
since you left the flame ablaze
and the tattoos
intact

I looked ahead
and stepped into
the seductive unknown
heart blind
eyes wide open

I looked ahead
into "what can be"
and gave "what" its curiosity
"can" its strength
and "be" its confidence

I looked ahead
and took a deep breath
with fear in one hand
and courage in the other

I looked ahead
but when I wanted
to take a step further
I felt a tug
on the strings
of my heart

Yesterday I heard the piano play
notes in my head
black and white keys
in symphony
so sweet

I heard its pure sound
hit every string
as thin as my patience
within

I heard the do's and re's
dance with the mi's
as smoothly as my mental state

I felt the reprimanding
low keys howl in awakening calls
to wake me from my drunken trance

I embraced the light hearted
high keys, as they showed me
the bright side of things
the innocence of it all

I heard a piano yesterday
play from afar, calling me
telling me, let go of everything
and listen....
just music to melt the silence away

My brain, lulled into its symphonies
I forgot that beauty is not only skin deep
I forgot that even with eyes closed
and no scenario,
you can feel beauty

I heard a piano the other day
play a harmony
just for me
about
me

We fall in love
like we fall for
dessert
quickly
and
irrationally

Bashed for my age
and my single-dom
I shrugged in carelessness
and slapped a smile on my face

Questioned for my actions
I hugged them and told them
to partake in conversation
that did not happen virtually
but physically

Shunned for my appearance
I loosened my untamed hair
and fixed my piercings
blew them a kiss

Miss-judged for my behavior
I lifted my drink and cheered them
for their ignorance

Ignored for my elation
I patted them on the back
hoping they'd only feel an iota
of what I feel, everyday

Punished for my recklessness
I begged them to see the world
through my eyes and how colorful
it would be

Insulted for my honesty
I opened their eyes
to their insecurities
that to me
are
truly
beautiful

It's like a stab in the heart
it's like rain on a new budding flower
it's like a hurricane on a summer day
it's like a tornado over lunch on Sunday

It's like thorns on a rose
it's like a paper cut on your finger
it's like a burn on your body
it's like a "NO" to an excited "please"

It's bound to happen,
you can evade such days
that hurricane will bring sunshine
that stab will heal into a beautiful scar
that budding flower will bloom more gorgeous than any
it
just
needs
a proper
dose
of
Patience..

Hang in there
it's a virtue
they say
let it
be
one of
yours

Putting pen to paper
slowly
                              serenades my nerves
and carefully
                              caresses my insecurities
to make me mindfully
                              and mindlessly
fall
for
every dent
the words put
in my chapter

Your kiss has shown
me fireworks
even with
eyes
clos
ed

Sometimes I like to knock
on the closed doors
of my mind
and visit
old memories
and feel things
that only
belong to
you
&
I

Kiss me a galaxy
and I’ll orchestrate
the best musical
with each and
every shooting star

Kiss me a note
and I’ll generate
volumes of kisses
imprinted for
each and every moment
I have wanted to
kiss you back

I have fallen
for the mess
of things
for surprises
have always
been my
weakness

As the cold crept under my skin
so did your kisses
as you planted them softly
on the carpet of goosebumps
that covered my body

As the wind slapped my face
with chills
so did your hands
as they cupped my red cheeks
holding it still
marveling at the beauty
that has bewitched you

As the rain damped my hair
curling them with winter surprises
so did you fingers
as they hypnotized me to sleep
uncurling all the disadvantages of the day

As the flakes rested on my lashes
so did yours against mine
as you got close to me
synching your breath with mine

As January embraced me
with layers upon layers of wool
so did your arms
as I roll under
my sheets
feeling my skin
against
yours

The sexiest thing
is a daring heart
willing to
break the bones
of your ribcage
jump out of it
to meet mine
half way

I let my guard down
and showed him my skin
full of freckles
I let him connect the dots
creating constellations
each with a story
that he narrated

I let my guard down
and showed him my flaws
galactic bruises
thanks to my clumsiness
and let him float in each one
marveling at the purple and blue

I let my guard down
and showed him my bashfulness
as it colored my pale cheeks red
and imprinted goosebumps
everywhere...

I let my guard down
and showed him the ways
I like to sin..
having my fuzz stand in salutation

I let my guard down
and showed him the other side of me
the one basks in the nature of things
naked, bursting with energy of the sun
emitting sultry rays that
brighten his eyes in astonishment

I let my guard down
and showed him
myself
full fledged
imperfection
put together in a beautiful way

I let my guard down
and showed him how my piercing eyes
move waves of emotions
in his gut

I let my guard down
and waited to see
how he will
enjoy such
a mystery
feeding
my kind of
curiosity

I have never enjoyed
the rain as much as I did
the night I bumped
into you
walking adamantly
to a destination
that I wished
conjoint
with mine

It starts as fire in stomach
it churns over burnt nerves
and over used thoughts

It makes it way up
to your pulmonary system
it clogs your arteries
fights the oxygen
slow asphyxiation

Then it reaches your mouth
unwanted word *****
shaken not stirred
leaves a sour taste in your mouth
those acids of despair
those uncontrolled insults
that stab the other
on hit after the other

Then it settles
like the waves of raging sea
it sits in fetal position
in the core of your brain
burning neuron by neuron
with flaming guilt
silencing all irrationale
and giving voice to logic

You sit there
awake, it's 5 am
and all you can do
is replay day themes
of your angry blackout

Oh rage you're such black magic
that I have
yet to
master

Blame the skies
for giving me the ability
to believe in infinity
in endless chances
after making mistakes
in numerous again's

Blame the seas
for instilling a sense of curiosity
that's seduced by mystery
under the pretty blue surface

Blame the stars
for granting me so many wishes
but never fulfilling my favorite ones

Blame my mind
for not having any borders
that filter what comes out of my mouth

Blame my heart
for rippling emotions that splash
that burn with spontaneity and glow with passion

Blame my dreams
for diluting my reality
with my favorite happy ending

Blame my mouth
for planting promises
on your lips that I wish
I can pinky promise forever

Blame my hands
for caressing and massaging
all the pleasures of life, the pleasures
of being natural, into that thick skin

Blame my words
for saying things
my mouth
will always
fail
to
vocalize
and finally
blame the
last moon
for always
reminding me
of you every time
it's full
anywhere
I am

Reality slaps
and I share
a form of
sadistic pleasure
that I seem
to seek
over and over
again

What have I done?
what's happening to me?
Am I diseased with
the sickness that's infiltrating
the whole nation

A nation of pill popping zombies
that has addicted itself
to the loophole
of "a pill for happiness"
"a pill for desensitization"
"a pill for nerves"
"a pill for life"?

Why have we become a generation of junkies
whose drug is legal
inflicted on us
but degree holding powers
because "they know better"?

Is it normal for humans like me and you
who feel
who see
who taste
who hear
who smell
to be controlled by a singular button
to be confined to a manifesto
of the "latest trend"

Are we all hypnotized
into morphing into the
"perfect body"
"10 ways to get smarter"
"look like this, don't eat"
is it a blueprint set by a superpower
to transform us to identical robots
to make it easier to control us?

Are we slowly walking down the path
of being identical?
Are we losing the only essence of what makes us human?
Are removing our imperfections
and surgically implanting
"my lips should be like this"
"my thigh gap is a must"
"my brain should have a set of guidelines"

What has become of us?
I pity the fish that
flow with the current
I cry over the youth today
I mourn the artists
of yesteryears
I grieve with the widowers
of lost souls

There's still hope
or so I try to believe
and encourage
the dying breed
of
perfectionists
the humble ones
those whose kisses only
land on lips
and not
*****

My heart
feels like it ran
a marathon
while
I am
in my
s
e
a
t facing
y   o   u

I always went for the natural look
till it dread itself with dread

I put some conditioner
and lathered its sorrows away

Little did I know
that I was manipulated into thinking
my natural was natural...

Till I dried it off
and saw a lighter curlier ...natural

It takes a slap of realization
to inject reality in your fantasy

It takes a kiss of honesty
to shock your hazy emotions

It takes a warm bedtime embrace
to instill your happily every afters

It takes a touch of you
to send chills of now, and not what can be

It takes you
to remember me

Every time
you run your hands
across my body
you melt a layer
of bashfulness
to reach
my raw core
that one
that roars
with you
&
for
you

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
to kiss your surface
dried to a crisp
under the summer sun

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
with the wind against my face
reminding me of
how beautiful
the autumn chill is

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
and looked around to see
others falling with me
face first aching to crash
and melt into something
beautiful

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
leaving the bland sky above
to touch something human
to feel some heat
against the coldness
that's embodied every cell
in me

I fell hand in hand
with gravity to send
an awakening chill
an awakening taste
of winter

I fell hand in hand
with gravity to bring to life
dormant senses put to sleep
by the beach and the summer
sweat

I fell hand in hand
with gravity to land
on your lips, chapped
by the past

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
to softy nestle
on your eye lashes

I fell hand in hand
with gravity
to create constellations
on the window
in front you
to follow your finger
as you trace my
next
fall

I tasted your fire
and now I am
in love with the
burn that
lingers
on my
tongue

I had a wish once
I wanted them to feel
when I wrote

I wanted to watch them react
to every high and depressing low

I wanted them to place their hands
on their chests, embracing their hearts
with security, as mine shattered on paper

I wanted them to giggle and laugh
as mine danced between the lines

I wanted them to take a deep breath
as I dove from the first line
into love and all its forms

I wanted them to know
that there's a world out there
on paper, in pencil, in pen
even typed
that they have
no clue about

I wanted them to yearn
for more
for no full stops for more flow
for more plots between him and her
sometimes between the sheets
or even dancing in the galaxies

I wanted them to
to
want

Take my heart she said
and place it between your ribs

Let me feel
an emotion, that has fled
my being for 2 years and counting

Take my heart she said
and color it red
let it blend with the color of passion

One that has chilled my sheets
with loneliness

Take my heart she said
mend its cracks, make it whole
for it looks nothing like a heart now

Just bits and pieces
barely holding on to
whatever keeps it going

Take my heart she said
and cover it with notes
that nurse it back
to mastering its own beat

It's just monotonous now
it needs a jolt
to bring it back
to bring
me
back

Take my heart she said
and when you're done
put it back
gently

Once upon
a time
I listened
and my story's
plot
thickened

Dear Mugger,
I hope you are doing well
and that amount you withdrew from my card
is being utilized to your benefit.

I just want to thank you
for putting me through the ******* on a Friday night,
at 12:35am.

I want you to know that
I had no idea my anger can reach such great heights,
or even such a caliber.
Adding to that, my voice wow my screeching voice
made the rats rattle in the sewers of the city

I hope that pink wallet treats you well
along with all its memories
that might seem like just paper to you

I hope they crawl out of that rectangular purse
and paper cut their way to your throat
I hope they leave a mark on your skin
just like they have on my life

I hope every moment
engraved on a piece of paper
in that wallet
cuts you so deep so your heart feels it too
just like mine

I hope my family pictures
burn marks on your chest
so you can feel how much warmth
they give me when I am alone

I hope my sister’s lucky charm bracelet
embraces your wrist so tightly
that it clots your blood
and hey it wouldn’t fall off

I hope the note my grandma wrote me in 2005
rests on your face
covering it, protecting you from evil
like it did for me
and in the process
suffocates you with all its love and might

I hope my ID cards
melt in your hands
so you can feel the burn of my presence
the impact that I have when
I
AM
AROUND

I hope my bank card
slits your cheeks
so you know that smile I have
at the beginning of every month

I hope

I hope, dear thief
that my wallet gives you a taste
of life,
the life I have
and poison you with how much
I am
blessed and you
are not

****
you!

I left you a threat
under my pillow
on the left side of your bed
my heart told me to so do

I left you years of care
hoping they'd sleep
and drift into dream
maybe become memories

I left you wishes
here and there
but for some reason
it just felt unfair

I left you watches
hoping time would treat you well
and remind you
of things passed

I left you kisses
on your back
hoping they'd serenade you to sleep
on sleepless nights

I left you with a scent
that I thought
would shake your fossilized
memories of me

I left you,
way before you left me
but not really
I never did

"You and I and us and being.
Such a messy sentence
and a fun thought.

It was something I sought
but never my mind
caught

My ideas with
my heart
fought
a lot

But time
fore
sought
a story we long
forgot

and time
took time
and ourselves
lessons
it taught

Until, it reached
the plot and realized
it's time
to bring
you
and I
to being
now
and
give us
a shot

There i(s)
a certa(i)n
place for you
(s)ustained
in my heart
by
bro(t)herly lov(e)
that you keep
(r)eplenishing