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878 · Feb 2016
Alternative
I hate being called "alternative"
I am not an option
I'm one of a
kind
876 · Jan 2018
Bloodletting
Blind
But still so receptive
To her negativity
Shut her out
I try
But she understands
Or so she says
Siren
Bloodletting for her love
Even if it isn't real
Help
I'll see this when I'm sober and probably delete it
866 · Jun 2015
Undone 10w
I'm not the kind of
                                 sick
                                              that can be fixed
864 · Apr 2015
Facing The Music
Our song came on the radio today
It made me sad at first
Then I realized
I wasn't in love with you
I was in love with the music
So I sang it loud
For me
F.O.B
864 · Jul 2016
Warm
Little ember you were a love so bright
But I didn't tend to you
And you dimmed your light
I don't ask much but I plead with all my might
Be my warm, be mine tonight
864 · Feb 2017
My World
She was the earth
I was the sun
She would shy from me if I shined too bright
I would dim just so she could breathe
She would weep as greedy men would throw trash at her
I would dry away her tears
She would turn to face me often, a different side to her everyday
But I can't help but burn everytime she'd turn
Knowing the moon got to love her as well
Death will consume us eventually
But for tonight, I will only taste it
As I lose my breath in my sleep
860 · Apr 2015
Bitter Tits of Irony
Lead me to your bedroom and lay me down on a box of glass
Take me like the others you drowned in to keep away your past
Moan someone else's name I want to feel your every gasp
As you **** me like they all ****** with you, at last
The irony is bitter,
Sour...
But it will pass
I love you to the depths of my soul and wounded heart
But this can be the only way I realize this too fast
Thinking too much will only **** you,
Come to me baby
Let's give this one more chance
855 · Dec 2016
Scared to be Alone
It's not love it's not passion
It's two insecure people trying
To lean on each other until they **** themselves
It's not cute it's not healthy
It works but for how long?
At least they're finally trying but in the end
We all end up alone
853 · Oct 2016
Enough
You make me feel like a fool
You have me thinking I'm crazy
You **** me with your eyes and act like its nothing at all
You were never one to kiss and tell
But you tell me no and kiss me senseless
I don't know why I'm still here
Burning up and cooling down every time you hold my ear
Three times I love you
Three times no
Too many masqueraded intentions and submissions
If only you'd open up and let me know
Nothing matters more to me than the trust
The tryst was fun but the mystery is enough
Kiss and tell and hold my lips
No more talking, no more lies, I plead
Gift me this.
This poem is broader than you think
I just wanted you to know
I hold your hand while you sleep
For I will never let you go
Into your head those nightmares creep
Bright eyed baby I am here
Hold me tight we'll make it through
An eternity without a care
And all the care in the world for you
.
My name is my reason and reason is my aim
To make friends with my demons
and keep them all at bay
I write and I write for it is all I can do
I write what I want I don't aim to please *you
Happy?
843 · Jun 2015
Shallow 10w
Poems are a lot shallower than we fear to realize
842 · May 2015
Sick Like Me
About time the pretty smiley ones spoke out
I used to look at them like
"They need a reality check, they have no idea
What pain and torment
A girl like me has gone through
What it's like to be cheated and lied to
Spat on and *****
What it's like to regret waking up each day
Only to face the cruelty of a hormonal imbalance"
Oh but they do. Only they deal a lot better
Than me.
They put on a brave face and deal
Just deal
Because they may LOOK like they have friends
And a home
And love
But inside they are just like you
Just like me
And it's about time they got honest and started speaking out
And helping others
**Like me
To all you gorgeous smiley creatures like me who deal. Speak out, don't be afraid what someone's gonna think or BELIEVE, let your demons breathe.
I love you sometimes
I'm living sin and heartache
The greatest web of a lie
Don't call me I won't answer
Don't text me I won't reply
Don't tell me you love me
Your heart will only break
Don't kiss me, sweetie
I make all the boys cry.
839 · Jun 2015
Don't Mind
Don't mind me
Everything is just a little too real
And you're not here for me
Don't fret now
I've gone MIA
My head'll come right
I've been like this since before I was born
So don't mind me
Or my tears
Don't mind at all
836 · Jun 2015
Death By Tears (haiku)
We weep far too much
Tears can't mend our broken hearts
Only deaths warm touch
836 · Jun 2015
Wrong Crowd
Watch them pass the roll of grass
As they fall...  
                         down on their ***
Let them sit and take a hit
Even though it smells like ****
I want to be a different kind of free
Where I can just be me
And dance in modest pants
To a song of romance
"It's not my crowd"
I say out loud
"I belong on the ground"
Far from the **** and tar
Out of the clouds running far
To a place bound in lace
*As pretty as my face
821 · Nov 2015
Depression My Old Friend
And so it returns
My oldest friend
Oh how you render me numb
And sad
So ******* sad
I left you behind on purpose
But you don't care
You've caught up to me
And so depression I must bear
You enter the room and embarrass me so
That overwhelming off putting sad face you make me show
You push my friends away
You make me lose sleep
You make me hate my job
You make life bittersweet
You make me lethargic
I'm just so ******* beat
Oh depression my old friend
You will always be my defeat.
818 · Jan 2017
I Cry
When I read a heartfelt poem
When I eat the last piece
When I stub my toe on the side of the door
When I bite my cheek
When I get wound up and in a huff
When I witness a creature die
Whenever I think about you now
I cannot help but cry.
So they cut
These words
Like the blade that sung your melody
As you cast it from your razor
Or your plethora of phrases
Come backs
Snarky remarks
And stainless steel
Like frost bitten angels we wail
And spit words like knives
If insults could sever arteries
We'd be less
Left
For dead
So we cut
With shaking hands and quivering jawlines
We cut with our moms good sewing scissors
And bitter cusses
And self defecating tunes
To save our souls from being cut by someone else
We are our own
Worst enemy
It's like
The sky came down and pinched the back of my neck
And took me too high too fast
So I shout
And I laugh
And I say inappropriate things
Other times it's like
The sky drops me and I know I'm falling
So I panic
And flail
And fight the inevitable
But it's no use there's nothing I can do to reduce the fall
I crash
I go real quiet and my head is tearing itself apart
My friends my family my own lover has no idea
What's going on
What it's like
Or how to help
Or that I know what's happening and can't help it either
So they get annoyed
Even angry
And so do I because I know it's affecting them
Almost as much as it's hurting me
So I cry
And I cry
And then I cut
Or snap my wrist with a hair tie
Because pain is the only thing that can wake me from the numbing terror
The grip of manic depression has on me
I feel the need to explain myself, ALL THE TIME and I know it's mostly all in my head. But I'm so sorry friends, family and lover for "being emotional" all the ******* time. It annoys me as much as it bugs all of you.
803 · May 2015
There Is No Light
"When you love someone who does not love themselves, you learn that you have to love them enough for the both of you.

And sometimes that becomes your crutch and lifeline and begins to takeover and blur the view of the relationship for both of you."
Taken from a beautiful article I read http://hellogiggles.com/someone-you-love-doesnt-love-themselves/2/
801 · May 2015
Look At You!
YOU! Yes you!
With the skin!
Are you really going to put
yourself *d

                        o
                             ­Â Â Â  w
                                                      n­ today?
Stoop to the level
of those around you?
Or *rise
from your tomb like a
fashionista from hell?
STOP
Pat your cheeks
Kiss your fingertips and take a leap
Because today is YOURS
And no one can put you back in that grave.
The flesh is so smooth and tender on your face
Right now I wanna watch you bleed
Oh how sweet your flesh would taste
Just take a bite of your cheek
Your dentist bill did you well
My teeth gnashing on your jawline
If there was a god I'd go straight to hell
Who's to say I would stop at one bite?
If I bound you down I'd go all night
I chose you for your eyes
Popping them out with nails
Burying my face in your thighs
I won't gag you, I like it when you wail
Just let me devour you whole
Like I did on our first date
I love you for your soul
Now get on my plate
Confessions of a cannibal x
791 · Apr 2017
He Cries 10w
He cries
And he is even more beautiful for it
Maybe we all feel sorrow stronger than any other feeling
And that is why we all write about it
Because there are so many ways to describe pain
And we struggle to find the words to speak of the joy we can feel
So we simply feel it
And that is why we don't write happy
I press my lips to you every moment I can
The briefest of love affairs you burn so bright
And then you are gone
Before I can even catch my breath.
779 · Jan 2017
I'm Sorry You Do
What hurts the most is because I don't know what it's like
But you do
And I'm sorry you have to know what it's like
And I am scared that one day I will too
That I will know what it's like
For someone I love to die
Anti-depressants are like prescribing a cure for a *******
773 · May 2015
The Back Up Drug
"He loves me"
                     She tells herself
                                                 She smiles

"He loves drugs"
                     She tells herself
                                            A part of her dies

"He loves me, he said so"
                      She tells herself
                                            She smiles a little less

"He loves drugs,
he said that too"
                      She tells herself
                                            She stops smiling

"But he loves me"
                       She tells herself
                                                  ......
                                                   Unconvinced
772 · Jun 2015
Forget to Remember
I remember so much that I forget
The same story I've told over and over again
How we met
That time I made a complete fool of myself
My dream I had 5 years ago
Everything
Because I'm worried I might forget
What made me happy and why
So I'll tell you over and over
Until the day I
Can't anymore because not only am I
scared
That I'll forget
But that you'll forget what we've
done
What we did before we became
one
Because sometimes
I repeat myself
But please don't be mad at me
I'm only forgetting
I told you
So we never forget
to remember
That we were always meant to be
I do repeat myself and I'm sorry I tell the same stupid awkward weird sometimes boring **** 6 times a day
But I want you to know I'll never forget how I feel about you
And why I feel that way now
768 · Feb 2016
Earth and Sky
You will find me between the earth and sky
For the earth is my mother
A fertile lover
A girl with the deepest brown eyes
The sky is my father
A long lost brother
With a set of bright blue eyes
I will kiss the earth lay with her each night
But it is the sky who holds my heart
I love the earth, with all of my might
But the sky won't tear me apart
766 · Oct 2016
Time
I hurt myself for loving you
There's a monster inside me I don't know what she'll do
Words are weapons for the weak
Without you I barely sleep
I broke my own heart in trying to mend yours
Every day I am alive is an endless chore
You hate me get in line
I'll never forgive myself until the end of time
761 · Apr 2015
Asses to Ashes
Rising from the ashes with a cigarette in my grasp
Stripped bare for all to see
A birthmark on my ****
Simmering in the embers of a relationship too burnt to reignite
A scar of the 3rd degree
A tear falling every night
I am to recover and be better off than you'll ever know
Despite the beauty of rebirth
We all rise from ashes
And it hurts more than we bear to show
760 · May 2016
Brooklyn Baby Blues
It doesn't matter where you've been
I'm only interested in where you're going.
So you didn't pass in school,
Bad habits look good on you.
I don't want to tell you my life story;
About my past and all its glory
Because we are just middle aged suburban trash
And I want to be where you put out your ash.
755 · Jun 2015
Kathleen Christian
Bouncing bubbly kooky
A bat was my teacher
Her hair all shades of fiery red
The most distinguishable feature
She would cling to Mr Russell
And giggle like a kid
He could only sit, uncomfortable
Every time she did
One day she came to class
With a cross look on her face
And cursed and muttered to herself
About the human race
We all just sat and stared
At our teacher in disgrace
While she crawled under the desk
Despite our love for her,
Mrs Christian is a shocking case
754 · Apr 2017
I Know
I know you aren't a poet
I know you don't write songs
I know you don't have a lot of money
I know you forget your wrongs
I know you aren't the girl of my dreams
I know you want to die
I know you forget I exist sometimes
I know you break down and cry
I know you don't tidy up much
I know you get low
I know you give up really easy
I know you don't let it show
But I know you try your best everyday
And that your heart is true
So for all the bad inside your head
Just know I'm here for you
753 · Apr 2015
For Lack Of A Better Title
You don't read my poems anymore
So here's one for you
Roses are dead
Violets are blue
This poem is ****
And I guess you are too
I'm done.
751 · Nov 2016
The Painful Truth
You sit in the back of my throat like last night's supper
I swallowed your lies because you were my lover
Who I did afterwards wasn't right
It was foolish and hurt and is wrong despite
The fact that I did it to save myself
To keep on ease my mental health
When you called me crazy for assuming the truth
No matter how hard you tried it was no use
You haven't changed and it's not my fault
That the girl you lie with now will never know
You don't really love her she's a painkiller
You're not an addict you're only a quitter
I had to let it out, it won't make a difference but at least you know how I feel
749 · May 2015
Tell It Like It Is
I'm not here to impress you,
I'm not here to censor my beliefs
and ****,
I'm not here to write about you
or myself,
I'm not here to always say
what I want you to know,
I'm not here to tell lies,
I'm not here to tell the truth either,
I'm not here to read
your *******,
I'm not here to write
******* for you,
But I am here to tell it like it is,
And can you blame me?
I'm cold
But I still care
I'm distant
But I wish you were here
My head and my heart don't go hand in hand
Unless that hand is strangling the other in demand
I'm hurting too but don't pity me
I need this, I know it, you know it, someday we'll see
If I get better and you do too
Maybe there's peace in this life again for me and you
All over the place but finally going somewhere
748 · Oct 2015
Precocious
She was Precocious
This girl knew what she was doing
She was smart enough
to act stupid
She was brave enough
to act afraid
And she was strong enough
to act weak.
She was wise enough to choose carefully
She was so particular about everything
She hit puberty sooner than every other girl in primary school
And her body
was doing her head in.
Her hormones kicked in too young
Her cravings were there before her peers gave up on believing in "cooties"
She had strong beliefs
An open mind
And a pulse in her ***** by the age of 9.
Some say Precocious
Others say she was "too intelligent for her own good."
She knew too much
She was emotional
and deeply understanding.
She had herself figured out and could hold an adult conversation
by the age of 11.
She was molested at 12 and ***** at 13.
This girl was a broken girl.
To "fix" this tear she sought someone she trusted to give her virginity to the night of her undoing
Years on she doesn't regret it.
But she does regret letting that so called best friend pin her down and ******.
But she chose who she gave her virginity to
It was the bravest thing she could have ever done and she knows it.
This girl is 17
She got lost in bad relationships and didn't know where her heart was anymore
Now she understands love and its comfort
and how it is the easiest thing to maintain and enjoy
and how it doesn't get in the way but instead is that warm thing she can come home to every night.

So yes, I grew up fast

And if you think I am foolish, moody, stupid,
absent minded and just like everyone else my age
Be my guest
Because I'm only enjoying being myself
And I can grow a pair and grow up
in less than a
second.

I am **Precocious
747 · Jun 2016
Mary
Cheery eyed Mary knew exactly what she was doing
Her cheeks were red with the rush
The young girl was only 10 when she started *******
And only older men could make her blush
x
744 · Oct 2016
Judgement 10w
744 · Jun 2016
Beauty Inside
You weren't made for your body
This vessel isn't right for you
Not when your heart is as pure as spring water
And your skin is no where near as clear
Your laughter carries so sweet behind gnarly teeth
And your kindness is hidden behind eyes so red
You just want to be loved
But your arteries are too blocked and your hands are cold
Your lumps your bumps your bad acne
It stops people from seeing the beauty inside
of you and me
733 · Jun 2016
Despite Everything Else
Lavender and lapis
Cinnamon and coffee
Cigarettes and tantric ***
Acoustic guitar and piano keys
Puddles and missed buses and Mp3 playlists
My highschool years weren't so bad
733 · Mar 2016
Good Ol' Hysteria
It burns
I can't help but laugh at my own tears
                Anticipating you and what you keep in your jeans.
It's silly...... CRAZY even!
               That I could sit rubbing myself against the edge of the bed
While you are....
Where? Where are you?
                             Clearly not here
Not close enough
Not hard enough
               I can't sleep I can't eat I can only watch you and weep
I'm sorry, come back
I wasn't going to bite...
               But I could if you wanted me to....
I'm hysterical my love,
                             I can go all night
732 · Aug 2015
I Know You Love Me
You don't have to say it
Though I love it when you do
You don't have to buy me things
But I love that a lot too
You don't have to text it to me
Or yell it down the street
Because I know you truly love me
When you hold me in your sleep
732 · Feb 2017
Tenderly
Don't cry tender soul it's not your time
Ask me anything and you shall see
Nothing is as hard as it used to be
I've brought you strawberry milk, let me nom your feet
Everything is perfect, your kisses all over me
L**ove me like I do you, you are the start of everything
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