i want you,
in every way there is to want a person.

from lazy rainy days
sitting around in underwear,
wrapped up in the covers
enveloped in each other.

to lustful late nights
high happy and in love,
too absorbed with each other
to focus on anything else.

i want you.
and i see so much in you
that counting all your perfections
would be like counting the stars,
there's too many to keep track of
and they just seem endless.

i am utterly in love
with every inch of your being,
every corner of your mind
and everything in between

i might not know what i believe
or where i'm going
or what i'm doing,
but i do hope
you'll hold my hand
and wander blindly with me.

because as long as i'm with you
i don't need a destination,
you are the journey.

i am simply enamored with your entity,
captivated by your character,

fascinated
infatuated
amorous

in love.

to know he is my soulmate
is the same as to know
that the grass under my feet is green

you said you loved me
i said it back.

you said you needed me
i was grateful to hear that.

you said you were mine
and i said i am yours.

you said forever
and i said forever more.  

you said you didn’t want to lose me
and i was content

but then you disappeared
leaving my tears alone with nowhere to vent.


you blamed it on the timing
i didn’t agree.

you blamed it on yourself
and i blamed it on me.

did i not love you enough?
were my hugs and kisses too flat?

i said i love you.
but you didn’t say it back.

if i lose you,
i'll lose myself too.

it ***** to think
i was gone all day
for hours
upon hours
and i didn’t receive
a single text
or message
from you


or am i just
expecting
too much
from you
too early
?

a milk chocolate man with yummy espresso eyes,
a goofy, crooked smile that never quits.
tight, soft curls pushed back in a black wave,
and a voice that floats on feathers

i would love you in the next lifetime
twice as much as i love you in this one
and many more lifetimes to come
i will always feel something for you

because you never gave up on me
even when the world came crashing down,
even when everyone turned their back on me,
and even when everything was against my favour

you never let me roam behind you,
you always knew when something was amiss
you let me express myself freely,
even when i was speaking nonsense

because you understood what it felt like,
to be misunderstood and overlooked
when you were at your most vulnerable
and for that, i love you eternally

because when i trace your skin
i can hear music

and when i look into your eyes
i see an ocean

now please tell me how
do i just let that go?

if you are going to fall in love with me,
you must know that i cry. a lot.

i cry during rainy days, sunny days, or on a monday morning.
i cry everytime i watch a happy movie and everytime i cut onions,
but do know that i cry harder every time i talk about the things that have hurt me, even if they don’t hurt anymore.

i need constant reassurance.
for i am afraid of being left behind, of being unloved.
i will probably tell you all the things i hate about myself
while you disagree with each one of them
but i still won’t believe every single word you’ll say.

i got used to shutting down the people who care about me.
it will be so hard for me to open up,
but all i’m asking you is to stay patient, and give me time to adjust.
you might think i’m rejecting your company,
but don’t blame yourself, i appreciate you.

so listen, if you are going to fall in love with me,
understand that i’ve been through the worst,
but still, i’ll love every inch of your skin unconditionally.