The saying goes, of sticks and stones
Only words could never hurt
Yet hungrily, infested me,
Rooted deep within my earth

Lies the pain of loss, not gain
But only discovered power
That found within a demonic grin
Would surely, destroy, devour

Consumed within the origin
Of bounds beheld by greed
At abyssal depths of consciousness
Sprouts insanity from seed

To view the bliss of ignorance
Another soul be claimed
In fire and burning brimstone
Begs the question of "what is sane?"

Perspective held and all is lost
For who knows right from wrong?
You never see, such sprouted seed,
Until you've found where it belongs

Do you believe
You can transfer disease?
Without actually catching
Anything?

More mental than physical
Either way this is difficult
This pain, or lack of it,
Driving me hysterical

For example, a normal bullet
Hiding in a clip, store it,
Load it, chamber it,
Point and shoot it

You've got hollow points
Like the hollow pain in my joints
At the base of my neck,
In my head, no drug anoints.

Then you've got Full Metal Jacket
The shots causing such a racket
Disorientating pain, all over again,
Sticking to you like a magnet.

No matter what I do, it won't go
Hollow points in my chest, as time goes slow
I just wish my hidden gunman
Would take his bullets to a cliff and over they go.

I don't wanna die
The constant danger that I defy
Lurking, elusive, sly
It tries to pass me by

So it can lay a trap ahead
One mistimed step and I'll be dead
My inner clock slowly winding down,
This pulsing presence, this unseen frown

Some sixth sense within,
Alerts me to the Devils grin
Won't ever let the darkness win,
Oh sixth sense, oh mi amas vin

I don't wanna die
'Till the end I'll always try
To walk this tightrope called life
And pray
It doesn't fray
As I scream for that wicked steel, that bloodied knife.

It felt wrong to have attention when all i wanted was space
It felt wrong to look in the mirror
And see my hated face

To know the thoughts that lie behind
To hate, to love to waste my time
There was no meaning and so i cried
Because why the **** am i still alive?

I know i tend to fixate on problems that don't matter
Only wishing i could go back before disaster even happened
Some people need to learn, to learn from mistakes made
Hypocrisy says i do that one thing every **** day

In preaching a solution and trying to make it apply
I happily problem-repeat I know the truth not the reasons why
Pushing at an answer for all my unknown questions
I ask too much yet not enough to feel slightly pressured

Second guessing my responses and accepting all the consequences
Similarly, weighing  50/50 on my consciousness
A problem-less probability of dealing with **** peacefully
Is like changing the definition of equality to equity

Everywhere i go i walk slow, just to breathe in the air
Walking with a swagger listening to Marshal Mathers like i don't care
What you think of me, keep talking the talk
I'll stride on by because i walk the sidewalk while y'all just stop and gawk
Staring at my hungrily like a fish to a ravenous hawk
I'm a Phoenix mother f*er it's a competition, of the squawk!

Like it's only my fault, just hoping to live a life
I'm not squatting in the shadows like a motorcycle with no brake line
You're wheeling out of control, wheezing coz of all you smoke
You wanna whittle at it and puff puff but your throat catches and chokes!

Gripping at all your lost dreams like trying to grasp sand
Time up, ticked over, read the back of my packet to understand
Trying always to make the best of a real bad situation
Like pulling rainbows and silver clouds from a city lost to mayhem

I turn to the TV and turn it on, another twenty dead
Because a Middle Eastern man let religion get to his head
That sort of **** sticks to me like glue to overused shoes
A few years old and growing mould, worn and torn under daily abuse

Another case of law and order failing at justice
Because people will talk tall **** just to evade the clutches
Did you know its a 497 cash fine,
For running red lights
Yet some mother got 500 for baby bashing crimes?!

She took straight to the Internet, said she'd do it all again
This stays straight on my mind like wedded couples wearing golden rings
Quite simply put, the system has me shook
Prisoners behind bars and crooks running free like headless chooks!

Maybe you're starting to sense a little something in what I say
If not then just for you I'll become religious, bless you and pray
That maybe someday, you'll glare past the flashing red signs
And meet it with a gaze like a good student meets every deadline

Sophistication is the message hiding behind my words
If you refuse to look further than death and dirt you won't witness the hurt
It takes time for mad rhymes stuck to brainwaves like lifelines
To resign, and reappear from the pen to padded paper lined

And it's even harder putting the pieces in place
This is a jigsaw puzzle, such trouble is a thousand mistakes
But align them like a cosmic balance; and there you have it
Another visionary hole for a dead and dying rabbit

*It's clear to me,
You can't see
What is going on inside my mind

So here i stand,
Do what i can,
To show the scars of what claws inside

It's clear to me
You can't see
The cogs turning gears inside my mind

So here i stand,
Pen and paper in hand
To read you the words between the lines

"Why do we go to war,
Dad? What is there to fight for?
Why is there blood on the ground,
Dad? What is that ugly sound?"

"Dad, why do people hate so much?
And **** each other with bombs and such
Rifles raised and triggers pulled
Bared canine teeth, throats mauled?"

"Why is the tenth leading cause of death in America suicide?
Is a reason to live so **** hard to find?
When tormentors hate
And chance becomes fate
Yet chance wants you to leave it all behind?"

"Why are humans so greedy Dad?
The thought of money makes me mad
Why must we be paid to live a useful life?
When it doesn't matter anyway, because the robber has a knife?"

"Why must we endure such hardships as death,
When one steals another's breath?
The click of the trigger, the bark of the gun
Another one dead, hope you had fun?"

"How is grieving for a loved one
With a bullet in his head, sent forth from a gun
Any way to **** time
Whilst the killer lives on, breathing just fine?"

"I don't get how humanity lives like this
Where killing each other is because we're all misfits
All different, therefore you must die
And join those fluffy clouds up in the sky"

When loved ones are left behind,
Yet you have a feeling that can only be defined
As a brotherly care, for the girl I once had
As we are now friends, and for that I am glad

The breaking up with her
Broke my own heart
I was afraid
That for good we would part

Yet she felt the same way,
And we agreed to be friends
In a brother-and-sisterly way, you understand
And that is how my today began.

You've had a rough day
I know what that's like
Believe me, you'll see
That life is a hike

But tonight
It's your time to relax
Don't reflect upon your day
Don't face the facts

Just be calm
Blow all your fears away
No more worries
For you today

Just rest your head
On the softest of pillows
Just lay in bed
Listen to the wind in the willows

Blow away
All the troubles of today
And listen to the wind
As the light begins to fade

We all have our regrets, and some things we can't forget,
But we throw the dice and pay the price of whatever happens next
Kinda like my first date, it was okay, to start with
I only wanted company, not "til death do us part" and it

Started slow, no real flow, until about a month
We would hang around each other and our hearts began to pump
Things were finally going somewhere, my hopes were looking up
To the point where every second missed would become too much

So yes I learned to love, and it burned a fire strong
We both called it "experiment" so we knew it all along
What started off slow and steady, would gain momentum
And at merely nine months in, would finally crash and burn

For a first shot, it went as smooth as it could get
But it would not be a sob story if I didn't have regrets
I never clarified with you the truth I only stuttered
Something about a burden, how it hurt, and I was flustered

So here's the nail in the coffin of what we became
I was there for you, to support you through, from start until the end
But at a five month milestone, I noticed your depression
It took a toll on you, but I was no exception

I've always been a loner with my problems in the corner
So when you stacked yours on top of mine, I thought "this is getting awkward"
"I got a lot of mine, and I tell her that I'm fine,
But now she wants to try some drugs, I think that's across the line"

At only aged fifteen, you told me your desire
To smoke away the night and day and drink fuel for the fire
I was really kinda stressed, always up late at night
I didn't wanna leave you but it seemed it was my pride

Telling me I could fix you, saying that I'm okay
But no man is an island, I could not find a way to stay
Never been religious, but to this very day
You cross my mind from time to time and I pray that you are safe

You see sometimes when I remember you I hate what we were
Because all I can reflect on is the pain and the hurt
Most of that came from afterwards, I set my anger on you
Because I felt I had been played, used and abused by

The rumours going round the school of myself and a "friend"
With benefits and that's the truth, apparently we had ***
Not the case, it's not okay, only two people knew
The reason I was so ****** was because I was convinced it was you

But I gotta say, well played, you got your boyfriend to call me
Moving on in just a few weeks, got him to confirm your story
Why could you not just say it? It made you seem so guilty
And all it ever did, was raise the hatred in me

Funny enough, after all that, you were the best ex
The other two, between me and you? Were really ill-met
The second would accuse me of pictures I never had
I even checked my galleries to be sure, ain't that sad?

She was insecure to a T and really couldn't trust me
I was being honest, she pursued it and then it hit me
"If this is the way it goes, then this never had hope"
She told me of her interest but after two months, she choked

Saying I never "got her" now that's not quite right
I merely had a higher understanding, and a sight
You see she was blind, could not leave her worries behind
And brought them to a relationship that was only doomed to die

And the third? Aha, I got with that friend
For all of eight days, what a shame, it was already dead
I never had that feeling for her, and when she came around,
My sister barely saw her, but hated the way she sounds

Its not that she's just bad, she's poorly directed
Quick to anger, gullible, your flaws made you defective
I remember back in year eight, you trusted your enemy
Over me, he said I called you fat, I never did, DONT QUESTION ME

I was loyal always, and that is how it started
Pretty much as soon as it began it had slanted
You said I never considered your feelings, and I suppose that's true
After all, I never thought to myself, "I'm in love with you"

You obsessed over me for FIVE YEARS, you see what turned me off?
Always wanting to hug me, when I just wanted you to get lost?
You can't respect my privacy, if I tell you something I tell YOU
Not for everyone around to hear about my TRUTHS

Lets not forget the fact that you're really quite petty
Remember our last texts, just last year, that you sent me?
I was in class, on my brothers anniversary
Ten years to that day, I wanted to mourn in peace

But I had maths to attend, I sat up the front
Then you texted me, asking if it was my best friend I'd ******
Still following a joke I made three months prior
I told you to let it go but you would not be quiet

So I let you in, on the joke, you would not believe
So I was telling you about how you should just leave me be
You went on to throw shade, calling me an *******
***** please, you know what this day MEANS TO ME, SO WHO'S THE *******?

That's what made me laugh, you thought you left me
Despite me making first moves, and so regretfully
I announce to my first ex, my failures thereafter
But now I've finally found peace, after all this disaster...

So I hope you're okay, and doing good in life
Hope you got the help you needed, to put down that knife
I hope you're healing up just fine, with eyes on the prize
Chase success, do your best, and for now I say goodbye...

What do you do
When a loved one lives in suffering?
What do you do
When every sentence spoken starts with, "Unfortunately..."?

What do you do
When you see an endless void of pain
By looking through their eyes
Where logic and reasoning lay slain?

What do you do
When you cannot calm the storm?
And have no other option
But to pray that new hope is born?

What do you do
When you want to stand, take action,
But can't?
Feeling so hopeless
As you watch your only one
Struggle to advance?

Hugs and kisses don't alleviate the pain
Logic and reasoning have been slain
Helplessness is your only reaction,
To the inability to take helpful action

What do you do
When you are afraid to lose
The only person who truly gets you?

The only girl you've ever had,
Needed, wanted, been with
From the start thinking
That the end is just a myth?

I love her with all my heart,
I hope she reads this and understands
Why I feel as though I'm falling apart
As though I'm stranded in a ravaged land

They said I couldn't make it, said I was worthless
Said I'd be nothing, and left me hurting
But as I rise up to the call
I know who I am, and I won't fall

I'm a glacier, in the middle of winter
I'm a saviour, or so it's been hinted
And though I am cursed and covered in dirt
I rise, unbreakable, with passion that burns

The man stopped, looked back
On a cold and windy night
Withdrew his hands from his pockets
And prepared himself for the fight

His eyes gleam like moonlight
His cigar, like coal
He dropped it on the ground
And beneath his boot it rolls

He breathes in the cold, fresh air
Getting in the mindset for trouble
Which he guessed would arrive
And do so on the double

In and out, quick little breaths
Trying to relieve the tension,
All his fear, all the suspension
It doesn't help but rather
Starts to pump adrenaline

His mind is an oasis of calm,
Cool and clear
His body trembles just a tad
As his muscles click into gear

Slowly he raises his head
Suddenly feeling steady
His mind is emptied of all its worries
And now?

He is truly ready

Humanity is more man than beast,
The exact opposite, for me, at least
I feel my inner darkness rage,
As it struggles to break the cage

I feel the sudden urge to destroy,
Unusual, for a young man, still a boy
Attending High School, with a girlfriend
The urge to make everything end

But as gentlemanly
As I can be
There lies a beast
Deep within me

Do you feel
The same way, too?
Or is it just
An anger issue?

Your lips against mine
Our bodies entwined
The bed in which we lie
The warmth we provide

All of which described
Are amongst my favourite kind

I'm like a teachers pet except what I  learn I regret
Eager to be the best but stressed when it comes to the test
I'd rather lay down mindful practicing in my head
Then to lay down mindless depressed as s__t in my bed

Death befalls those ****** to wither
And as we are all flowers lacking that life inducing water
****** to death are we all

They say that your dreams are sky-high
That to reach them you gotta fly
Up past the clouds, further than the sky
Wait too long and the stars might die

For every star holds your hopes and dreams,
Don't mistake them for jets because stars don't scream.

They call

I feel myself drawn to those orbs of fire
Hanging up there, holding my every desire
But I don't wanna go up, I'm a resistance fighter,
I don't like going places higher and higher

I fall
And I am afraid of heights,
So I stall
And at ground level I still crawl

Teach me to forget my fears,
The clouds will pass and the sky will be clear

I look up into the sky with a sense of longing,
I'll stop being lonely and start belonging

I smile
It's genuine, it's been a while, but I smile

an acid, a poison, corroding my thoughts
crossroads that run four different corridors
at the end of each, a padlocked door
not much to see but here, have a tour

one leads to Guilt, it opens a lot
and from deep inside lies a scent of rot
imagine sunken eyes, decay-riddled flesh
crusted tears caught in the folds of saddened death

the second leads to Rage, hear the beast in the cage
a vicious monster kept, a lion untamed
the red claw marks along the walls and the blood that dried
I've lost myself so many times you could say that I died

to your six opens Doubt, a hollow void indeed
you can feel the pulsing dark, lustful or greed
its desire is destroy, to run down into the ground
and claim my soul its only goal, gone without a sound

the fourth is most vicious, a chasm called Depression
all your thoughts and feelings, kept under suppression
for to voice all the voices telling you that you should die
is the means to take away the chance that you may try...

and in the centre stands me, isolated by this pain
the likes of which to share would be of zero gain
a problem told is a problem halved but this one can't be cut
I know things that can, but the unsolved is worth much

and I keep what's mine....

You think you have me beaten?
Well the war has just begun
You think because I have blood on my face
That it’s over and you’ve won?

Well take a second guess, mate
And look me in the eye
Do I look like I have lost?
Do I look like I’m gonna cry?

What’s that you see?
I’m actually starting to smile?
I haven’t unleashed my inner beast
He has yet to taste freedom (I think it’s been a while.)

I keep him in a vial,
I keep him locked up as ashes
Yet once I pop the rubber cork top
It flows out, coils and thrashes.

Forming a darker version of myself
An inner demon, if you like
And his hand curls into a fist
Now it’s my time to strike

I study your face carefully
As I regain my feet
What you just thought was victory
Has you realize that it’s defeat.

A growl escapes my lips
As this beast bares his fangs
My hands turn into claws
And in shock your face does hang.

I only have one word for you
So I’ll say it once, and be done
I look up with blood-red eyes
And simply utter “Run”.

I leaned against the bench
Just praying for my end
A memory slipped in unnoticed
And then I came to my senses

He wants me to be like this
He wants me to question life
What's a life worth living
If you just want to die

Not sure where I'm going
And I don't care where I've been
But if there's one thing that I know for sure
This pain doesn't end

Not sure where I'm going
And I don't care where I've been
But if there's one thing that I know for sure
This pain doesn't end

Just when I'm back on track
He reappears again
Disguised himself as past events
Pretending to be my friend

I started having thoughts of death
How far could I go?
Before I lost all reason to live
I guess we'll never know!

Not sure where I'm going
And I don't care where I've been
If there's one thing that I know for sure
This pain never ends

I tried to call out to you
And you turned away
A world once filled with vivid colours
Became a misty grey

The Sun rose like another moon
Pale and fake
Another reason to add to my list
Of the scars I bear today

Not sure where I'm going
Don't care where I've been...

I don't give a **** where I'm going
Don't give a **** where I've been
One thing that I know for sure
This pain doesn't end

One thing that I know for sure
This pain never ends
I tried to be happy once and all I know is
It never happened again!

One thing that I know for sure
I've tried my very best
But it's hard to leave this world behind
Because I'd never know what I missed...

So I'll stay...

But a small shift in the earth
Can cause unforseen circumstances
So deviating from what you should do,
My friend,
Will make your future uncertain

Think about the risk you run
Before you run for the reward

I dont care what you say about
Men we're not ******
To stay silently violent,
Guns ready to fire

We aint gunslingers, walking all alone
We've minimal ammunition, we all wish we had more
A collectors store without boredom full of lead and war
A bitter path torn from the bitter hearts reward

The Devil walks on, in our soul the Lord's been gone
For at least two thousand years then a little sprinkle more
Didn't you hear? Crucifixion is addicting to the body
When by God's will he rose from where he lay rotting

See what i don't see is a solution for me
The evil in our hearts advance like Moses to the Red Sea
Its almost meant to be, that he's not for you or me,
Crazy it seems to be but crazy is what defines me

And refined finally, my thought process to polish
Perhaps you reject common facts by faith you'll abolish
The abomination that is by my nomination
The station, by which we pull the train that is a failing religion

If prayers did ****t for you, then that's cool, stay by God
And pray away the starvation, the slaving and the rot
But without action your thoughts and wishes are dead fishes to an aquarium
"Watch out kids, the smell is strong, just don't sniff it then"

God ****** by God's hand is his Children abandoned
You may live on with hope, but we're worse after moving on
In fact little has changed, our ways opinionated
But hey, that's my opinion and it'll get me killed if i say it!

So i guess i should claim this work as just a joke to rehearse
Coz if i don't then the Church will burn me at the stake like a demon I'm cursed
"Leave this blessed place, lest you stain the face of this Earth
With jokes and humour, you curse-hurdling mind-turtling ****"

Well that's okay, any place is better than Hell on Earth
Where pedophiles **** over little kids, yet I'm the joke and the curse
A lesson unlearned, as humans we burn
By the very nature of the forces that reproduced us like birth

A faulty experiment, that's what we are, just vermin
Little rats and mice, pests like head lice, ya guts churnin'
Feeling sick to the core, but you bought a survivors score
Tally up the years without chalk, just fingernails and whiteboards

Annoyed am I by the supposed gifts of God
If his gift is for us to **** ourselves then we surely bought
Into a failing cause, this opinion wont have sought
Anything but negativity where's the debate for which i fought?

So as you can tell, I'm the spitting image of Hell
Defined by my lack of presence at the toll of a bell
Sunday's are my lazy days, yet everyone else's to pray
I'd rather not trust into the tiger as prey

He'll eat you up, your money, your life and your family
Eyes closed and hands clasped with minds surrendering
I should be thankful this was hardly forced onto me
Otherwise I'd be just another religious zombie

My faith lies in evidence i can see feel and touch
So unless you have the man Himself i wouldn't dedicate to anything but lunch
Food is good for your body, another real thing to me
If i wanna cleanse my soul I'll do it with something that fully fulfills me

And its not bowing on my hands and knees
Just to please or displease an unseen deity
The variety of higher powers that can't be viewed
Is just the more clarity that the truth is skewed

I'm a man of psychology, technology and biologies
The chemistry that makes me be is a visual clarity
The evidence of God's work i cant see before me
So either I'm blind or wide-eyed and y'all are dreaming

But whats an opinion to you, when all y'all pursue
Is the chance to strike a match and dip into kerosene, no clue
What happened to our honesty, honestly its lost on me
A dishonest man is just a common story thief

They're everywhere, once more the rat
But y'all done goofed now because guess who's back?
That's right, the black cat, the night owl, not Shady
He maybe be a little crazy but he ain't me

So eat me or beat me, push away the locks' key
Turn it into wine and bread and then decide to feed three
Because that's the magic number and its bothering me
How death, d!cks and dishonesty are all around me

Hahahaha, the jokes on me
Naturally, there comes a fee

I'm constantly tormented
By the people who I've come to hate
I wish I didn't have so many hostiles
But I know my wish is too late

I don't know what I did
To deserve such negative attention
There are so many.....
It's like a Bullies Convention

I just want to get by
And go on with my life
But no matter what it is I do
Someone always wants to cause strife

Like one time, a kid thought
I had a "*****" over a teacher
And the amount of times he said it
Almost convinced me he was a preacher

One day I'd had enough
Decided that he wasn't so tough
"Go on, say it again"
I dared him
"You had a *****" and that was it
I snatched my pen off my desk
Called him over and stabbed his chest.

He pulled out his Ipod charger
And whipped me with the cord
I stabbed him once again
My stationery, my sword

But Justice didn't win
For it never does
He kept up his stupid act
The sight of him gave me an adrenaline buzz

I was half hopeful I'd get another shot
To crash his act, make his friends leave him to rot
But before I got another chance
He dropped out and my confidence began to advance

I now know how to fight
But I promised to never act irrationally
This promise that I keep
May just be
The death of me.

Yet the torment continues,
I've given up on threats
But I know what's happening behind the scenes
People are placing bets.

How long until I snap?
Well, I already have
I've put up with too much
Time for the good guy to turn bad

"How much do you really care?"
"How much do you really wanna know?"
"Badly"

lights cigarette " Well...let me tell you"

You, could, have the worst day and I'd laugh in your face
Tell you I told you that joy was erased
Look to the sky and be blinded by light...
-ning as it crashes down, cuts through the night!

Hell's gates could open, and in you would fall
And with all your screams, I'd still feel **** all!
You could walk off the flat earth and into the void
I'd carry on normal, and not paranoid!

Turned into ashes, blasted to bits
Drowned in a lake, in my face your neck splits
Spray me with blood, I won't feel a thing,
I'd lap at the crimson, thanks for the feed!

Death welcomes all, where life may not want to
The curtains will fall, and then you'll see the truth
The truth of it is, I only care enough to tell you
To yell or to whisper, I won't mourn when they bury you!

A hail of hatred won't stop me,
A blockade of ******* won't either
So stop trying and leave me alone
Because neither will defeat me

The Bible states that ignorance is a sin
Which is why I don't ignore
The evil and greed stored within

Whenever I have a dream,
I just cannot seem
To wake up to reality
The weight of this pain pressing me
Like gravity

But all of a sudden I see,
With crystal-clear clarity
These dreams are a sadistic charity

Donated to someone who needs them,
But why must they condemn me
To see,
My friends cut into ****** pieces
And eventually,
I cry
As they die
Rather quite brutally?

And I cannot move,
There's nothing I can do,
For you...

Why must I be haunted
By what I dread,
Something I cannot change
For good?
As I lay, restrained by these thoughts,
Shivering in my bed?

I'm haunted,
And there's nothing I can do,
To help you

Every night,
I wanna cry
Because there's so many torturous ways
For you to die,
And I try,
To leap out of these restraints,
Lower my head and fly,
But the harder I try,
The more my weakness multiplies
As I lay haunted by the night

And I cannot move,
There's nothing I can do,
For you...

But when I wake,
I realise my mistake
I let these dreams take
The very best parts of me
Bet you can tell
By looking into my eyes
Where these dreams lie
As they disguise
Themselves as meaningless
As they hope to defy
The law that dreams
Do not come true
It's alright if you pry
I let you in
Didn't I?

I cannot move,
There's nothing more I can do,
For you
'Coz I'm haunted,
And there's nothing more
I can do

My mistake
Was letting my dreams take
My integrity
And ability
To hold myself together. Even now,
I feel myself slide away
As the light slowly fades
And I lay here in bed,
Shivering with fright,
Scared of the night
As I turn out the light
And all hope slips out of sight

I cannot move,
There's nothing more I can do
"Coz I'm haunted,
And there's no-one left to come...
To your rescue...

Yeah my dreams are pretty bad
Not only do they make me sad
But realise
I win first prize
For being unable to steer you clear
Of stormy skies
After all, I suppose,
We were all born to die
But no matter how hard I try...

I do not want this evil fate
To befall you,
But....
There's nothing more I can do, for you.....

A warm, fuzzy darkness
Sinking deeper to the pits of misery
Turning to an abyss of water
Tentacles of doubt restraining me

Pitch black, murky shadows
Bubbles of air escape my lips
My hair thrashes as my limbs cannot
A screech of metal from raking fingertips

My soul screams in desperation
As it approaches a chasm f loneliness within
As I near the Eternal Destination
Do I be saint or one with the sin?

A light, gently teasing, shines down from above
My doubt-imbued prison lessens, then fades
As the light surrounds me, surrounds everything
Chasing, pursuing, all the darker shades

I rise from the water, am pulled up, fully encompassed by light
She laughs, comforts, reassuring me with dark hair and eyes
I laugh too, no longer feeling heavy,
As light and as free as the birds in the sky

She wraps her arms around me, pulls me in
I hug her back, tight with fear, for I wish to stay
She leans up, mouth to my ear, and whispers:
"Look forward, not back, and you will find a way"

A gentle kiss on the forehead, a scruff of my hair and a sad, sad, smile
She speaks once more: "In a while, crocodile".
It fades back to darkness, and I cry as I remember my dream
I am alone, in the night, with only the sheets holding me

Fearing and seeing
Death, wars and bleeding
Hearts, lives receding
Like the tide
It's turning

Inside, it hurts
Painkillers don't work
Demons, in night, lurk
This fire is burning!

I will not die,
I will survive
Try my hardest
To live a life
Worth singing about!

Drowned out in music
F_ck it, let's do this
Flips up a hood
Burn the world, it's what's good!

Mesmerised, little flame
Life is one big game
Play it how you want
Just don't be mad when it's gone!

I will not die
I will survive
Try my hardest
To live a life
Worth singing about!

Time ticks, clocks wear
Down and they all tear
Rip the time they represent
They all sound unpleasant

Ticking and clicking
In the night they keep working
Away at my sanity
Sandpaper to insanity

I keep pushing, he pulls back
It's hard for me to relax
When I go to sleep at night
It's a hard-won fight!

I will not die
I will survive
Try my hardest
To live a life...
At all

130 followers huh?
Wow, I... don't know how to react.
Take this pitiful thank you and know it's roughly 1/1000th of what I feel

Thank you all

<3     :^)

The Devils thoughts lie deep inside,
"You can run but you cannot hide"

I curse myself, but I've a love for you
A bit more than friendship, this is true

I've made this mistake before, but not another one
I will not hide but by God I will run

Hey
I see
You discovered perfection
In the words that
You write. Did I not
Tell you so? Perfection exists within
Anything and everything. You just need to
Look hard, and search deep, to find the
Secret we all keep. Search until the end of time,
And you will find the perfect rhyme. For you, the
One and Only. You know who you really are.
Yeah, you, You, the one with the
Hidden Agenda

The ******* get bitchier by the year,
The most common insult is "that ***'s queer"
I ignore the threats, laugh at the bets
And I'm still laughing when I smash in their head

Some don't believe, others try to deceive
They think I'm weak but that's what they see
Looks can be deceiving, the only quote I'm reciting
Hope they think the same when they're beaten and bleeding

My father told me not to start ****
But honestly, they just keep going at it
One day I'll snap, fall into the trap
And bust my way out as if I had a secret map

High-school horrors, mocking me
Taunting me, make me bleed
My heart is bursting full of rage and hate
You better give it up before it's too late

Fate and chance, holding hands
Slowly waltzing, eternal dance
So I'll bide my time, and spring the opportunity
Leap at it with both hands and fulfil my destiny

I know how to fight, hoping you're getting this right
I try not to overkill but I can show you lights
Showtime, centre stage, playtime, anytime
Storytime, finalised, tell it to your kids

About that one kid who took them all down
Grabbed his neck, forced him back, slammed his *** into the ground
Smiled and laughed at their pathetic attempts
The worst thing for your business is when you mess with the best!

High-school horrors, mocking me
Taunting me, make me bleed
My heart is bursting full of rage and hate
You better give it up before it's too late

I've decided, this isn't worth listening to
So what you gonna do?
I hope this gets through to you

I've decided, I now know what I'm gonna do
So what you gonna do?
When my fist meets your head and it bursts right through!

Blood on the ground and a beautiful sound
Finally, silence, paralysed by shock and horror
Didn't expect this? Didn't think of the consequence?
Should'a thought it through now let me just finish this!

High-school horrors, mocking me
Taunting me, make me bleed
My heart is bursting full of rage and hate
You better give it up before it's too late

High-school horrors, mocking me
Taunting me, make me bleed
My heart is bursting full of rage and hate
You better give it up before it's too late

Goodbye:
One word, significant of farewell,
I won't see you again.

Can also be used
To say you won't see someone the same way

The hardest part about a goodbye,
Is seeing someone you know become a stranger

I wear the Reaper's desires, hide myself away
He cursed me with his shroud, I've become a Wraith
I scream ****** ******, his jaw forever grins
Everybody dies, and nobody ever wins

Short lived is our hope, and so we turn to faith
Making up our deities to fill the empty space
God can you hear me, howling winds respond
I grip a neck of glass, so the numbness is prolonged

I hate all I see, and I see myself in all
So I watch me **** everyone, in agony they sprawl
Nothing left but bloodied grin and scarlet dripping blade
The clouds cry my anguish, and pelt the muddy *****

Pretty roses splash and stain, madness left to claim the reins
All is shades of darker grey, maroon petals left to fade
Desperate fingers claw my flesh, this nightmare will never rest
For the shadows, they have spoken...and beast, asleep, has woken...

I was walking along the sidewalk,
Near the shop windows, head down, empty minded.
A little face caught my eye,
At first I thought he looked on only in curiosity

But after a second glance, realised he
Was, in fact, in misery.

I force a smile upon my face
Crouch down to his level, mouthed
"Are you alright?"
From the other side of the Barbers window
A shake of the head, long hair whipping his face

"Help" he mouthed back
Tears sprung to his eyes
"I barely know you" I mouth back
"How can I help?"

"Get me out of here", his lips form back.
And a tear finally spilt from his eyelid.
"I already trust you".

"You don't know me",
Why do you want to leave"?

He ***** back his finger and mimes shooting himself.
"They are going to **** me".

I sit back on my haunches, thinking: You're kidding me.

His eyes deny my doubts, defy them with honesty.
His tears fall genuine, not like those of a crocodile
His face is framed by innocent light
His body shadowed, out of sight.

"Life is tough, kid", I barely manage to say
"That's a lesson you gotta learn.
I mean, how can I help you
When I can barely help myself?"

"My emotions are like a storm
My attitude, my mood, like dual personalities
I care for my ex, and have a kaleidoscope of feelings
For two different girls: one of light, one of dark
I feel guilty all the time
For they aren't in my control
And I have to decide one over the other
And yet one already knows!"

"I wish I could help you kid,
Save you from your inevitable doom
But I myself am no miracle
So tell me:
How can I help you?"

There was no goodbye,
No farewell
Just a demon and his demons
At the gates to hell

Didn't know how,
Didn't have a clue
How I'd ended up here
Or what I was to do

I swore I'd protect you,
That I'd try and sort it out
And when I went with my instincts,
I didn't see any doubt

I did what I had to do,
Everybody has a limit
I was standing on the edge,
And ya almost pushed me in it

So I quit

You can call me a quitter,
Though not for one second, did I ever lose hope
That you'd pull yourself clear,
Holding onto, that escape rope

I'm happy that you've come so far,
That you're almost fully fixed
Check back down the assembly line
And I realize I am next

Thank God for it,
Don't know how much longer I can go
Before I finally reach salvation
And simply utter "no".

There was no goodbye,
No farewell
Just a broken man with hopes and dreams
At the gates to hell

You can call me a quitter,
Though not for one second, did I ever lose hope
That you'd pull yourself clear,
Holding onto, that escape rope

You can call me a quitter,
Though not for one second, did I ever lose hope
That you'd pull yourself clear,
Holding onto, that escape rope

I need no goodbye,
Or farewell
Soon I'll be an angel
And fly away from the gates to hell