It lurks below my consciousness, the beast beneath the bed
Tortured by imagination, vivid in my head
Strikes without notice, the world is dark and blind
To all the ****** massacres that play behind my eyes

Victimhood held hostage, convinced manipulation
Sickly soul so serpentine, saboteur salvation
Left within the grimaced grin, of tormented left demented
Suffer so, these chains and ropes, you'll never be accepted

Amusement starts to linger, maybe mould, or rot
Decaying internally, for he feels the hope is lost
So smile, smile, smile, and learn to love the sinner
For all that will remain is this twisted, Grim Grinner

Pattering on the roof,
I slump against the windowsill
Press my face against the cool glass
As tears streak the inside
And rain streaks the outside
And all I can think is
Why?

Memories,
Like ashes
Scatter on the wind
As fire flashes

Embers rise,
On blackening smoke
Then die down
Once water has woke

Memories,
Like the light of day
Once bright,
Then fades away

Leaving streaks of light
During sunset
As the moon rises
On a wave of regret

Memories
Both bitter and sweet
Make time go past
In your mind's retreat.

I find my inspiration
In my day-to-day happenings
Now I seem to have lost it
Even though it gleams like a diamond ring

Where you at, Inspiration?

It's a shame to exist in a world
Where loyalty is currency
That friends only befriend you
For their own ends
That people don't listen
When you say the truth time and again
That they accept the lie of "I'm fine"
And it's only when you cry that they give you a piece of their mind
That they're willing to corrupt you with thoughts
And laugh as you clutch your head, screaming, drawing on the walls
And laughing all the more when they set you up to fall
And stand over you, triumphant, when your life is agonising crawl
And when success is nearby and you're happy,
Well then they make you stall
Second guess and doubt yourself
And you listen because you think that no-one else...
No-one else will

Find your true friends
And hold on to them,
Like the diamonds they are

They say when tough times come your way you gotta push harder
Be stronger
Move faster to live longer
But sometimes the fight itself, it just ain't worth fighting
And you gotta let it take you, kicking and biting
And when that same time comes around again, you give it your all
Build yourself back up where before you let yourself fall
Because
What it does
The pain isn't enough
But the success is two times greater when you pick yourself up

Satisfaction from hard work, blood and sweat on my hands
Put it in to position maybe you can understand
That although it tears and hurts to distance myself
During this time we can rebuild, helping ourselves

And you know who you are I don't need to say it
If your emotions were a game, then I swear I played it
And the whole situation ***** because I knew all along
But I gotta push past it, move faster just to stay strong

So I aint getting hooked, I'm just letting you know
It ain't solely one's fault but each to their own
But I guess that's okay, I'll build myself up again
See you when I'm done here,
Sincerely, Tigris

Times get tougher as life goes
And where the bar is set nobody knows
Anger, sadness and happiness so strong
Doubt and jealousy, legacies of right and wrong

Moral compass points us north or points us south
Doesn't always seem to dictate all our thoughts, that come from mouth
It's at crossroads of choices made
Where the needle flickers in any which way

And I'm angry, so ****** and I
Know how to deal with it but
Kick starting a practice, when old habits won't fall...
It's a struggle itself but I'll give my all

Three weeks since **** went down and I'm not the same
I jump at the sound of familiar voices calling my name
I don't want them to know, what I've become
A monster of a human, werewolf on the run

How many thoughts cross my mind?
And how many so dangerous I'd like to leave them behind
Actions from reactions sure, but I've wanted to ******
And my blood through my veins it runs so cold....

A permafrost in motion, an avalanche of ache
And a heart so emotional, like the ****** burning at the stake
To voice the unvoiced is a choice that exposes me
And I'd rather keep on hiding underneath

And I'm so ****** so ******* angry
Too strong now what is happening?
I've never before been so cold
And the shadows lurk across my soul,
Like horror stories untold

And it all unfolds....
There lies no happy ever after,
Only satisfied
With avoiding most of the disaster
And just survive

You like to talk big when you got barrels of luck,
But the moment you’re in a cop shop your trap is stuck
So here I stand, I stand in front of you, this been a long time coming
If the effect we have is a marathon I spent a long time running

Ever since year 9 when you bullied me for my teeth
But now that I got braces you got nothing against me
All you can do is show off, calling “******”
When you ain’t with your mates where’s your confidence, maggot?

I’ve had it; up to here and this is all that’s left
The better man won in terms of intention, life’s a test
And it breath tested you and decided you’re *******
Because you picked on the wrong guy and there’s nothing left to prove

So step up or step off, confess to sin
You may as well because I remember everything!
Something you gotta know is to know your enemy
You don’t know what I’m capable of, or what I got happening

So you never even bothered to think of a strategy
You got caught, you lost, it’s going down rapidly
And it’s only a matter of time before they get you in for life
Because there’s pleasure in the knife but nowhere left to hide

Send your boys after me, they’ll end up with you
It would be an understatement to say this is rude
I hate this entire thing, I did this because you tried
To pressure me into letting him off, and now you lied

Just to save your *** but witness statements
Are the one thing to condemn the case, admit defeat just face it
With you and all your “violence” and I barely lifted a finger
Funny how safety works, hopefully this lesson lingers

Took a sucker punch to the guts
Man, romance can really ****
I don't know what to do
But yell out "what the fck!"

I'm just riding this rollercoaster,
This pain in the *** called life
It can be good
It can be bad
And that's my only real advice

Left to my own devices
I'd scream out at the night and
Stand out in the rain and pray
That my mixed emotions find an end

Confused as fck,
I'm out of luck,
Wish I could get out of this,
But I'm stuck

Man, life is a btch,
When your mood starts to switch
And
You wanna go back in time
But you know that'd be a glitch

Tear down my feelings,
Before the rise from me
Tear and claw and slash at them
Defeating my enemy

I know I am stuck with
My heart given to another
Yet the way that she sees me
Is she's my sister and I'm her brother

Now I'm not saying I don't like that,
In fact I don't mind
That she can take comfort knowing
That I'm a nice guy inside

And that she can trust me
With whatever she wants to
I wouldn't ever blurt her secrets
If I wanted to die that's what I'd do

But I'm allowed to want something more,
We are all allowed
To dedicate ourselves to what we want
She's my religion and I'm devout

Confused as fck,
I'm out of luck,
Wish I could get out of this,
But I'm stuck

Sunshine
Face shines
Happiness

Clouds cover
Rain falls
Sadness

Turbulent wind
Lightning lashes
Anger

Face shines as
Tears streak,
And all I want to do
Is lash out
So what does that make me?

I reminisce
These memories
They haunt me
As they would you
If only you knew
What I’ve been through

I’ve tried too long and I’ve tried too hard
To let go of my demons, to let go of my past
History repeated again and again
But I can’t let go
And it never ends

I remember a time where happiness ruled
But over time the sun faded and darkness pooled
In my mouth, down my throat and into my heart
Corrupting me, turning me from the light to the dark

Sometime ago, I sought an answer
To a prayer I never wished to voice
That I could find a way to end this pain
But I chose the wrong choice

I made it physical
Because I hated being emotional
(Men don’t cry)
But despite my attempts
To replace what I couldn’t stand
(Soon after, I wished, to die)

And my wish came true!

I became addicted to what tears me apart
I let the blade through my skin, and into my heart
The one thing I turned to, that never mocked who I was
Was the one thing that destroyed me, within my lust

I suffered needlessly, I was my own scar
I didn’t wear them they were me, right from the start
The moment the steel brushed my skin
Was the one day I faced my end

So hear my words, don’t get caught in this trap
No matter the problem, bullied or harassed,
It will swallow your soul
A demon to devour you whole
And leave you with nothing but regret

I reminisce
These memories
They haunt me
As they would you
If only you knew
What I’ve been through
And why I’ve done the things
I continue to do

I’m seeing someone about all this
Because I have problems waiting to be fixed
Things I can’t handle on my own
But then again, I’ve always been alone

The boom of guns rolls through the hills,
And down the smoke-filled land
Aim and fire with precision,
That soldiers sleight of hand

The bullets fly,
The brave men die
Back at home, the families cry
This is the Price of War

The foolish rise from the trenches,
The wise, low to the ground
The one thing they have in common
Is they seek and end, what cannot be found

The bullets fly,
The soldiers die
Back at home, friends pray and cry
Why do we go to war?

Why must we take up arms,
And spill blood on our beloved land?
Pick up guns, shoot and run,
When we can unite, hand in hand?

It's not fair for the rest of us
Waiting for our soldiers to come home
And then get told the bad news,
That many won't come back at all

The bullets fly,
The brave men die,
The loss of kindred
Makes the kind-hearted cry

Why must we pay the Price of War
When we don't have to fight at all?

The universe within us;
The light of a million suns explodes
Throughout my head,
And solely from physical contact

I gotta feelin' in my chest and it burns right here,
Coz' I hold you so close that I'm always filled with fear
That sometime, you'll just disappear
Into the night,
After tellin me everything'll be alright

I always worry about you,
Because without you
God only knows what I would do

I wanna make some memories together,
The sort that makes time seem to stretch forever
And if there's one thing I ain't never
Believe
It's that there's another sort of you out there
For me

Reality can try and deceive
Making me wish that I just wanna leave
But you know how I am at heart
I'm so close to you that I won't ever part

But as optimistic as I am
I know this can't last forever
And I'll have heartbroken memories
Of our happy times together

But until then,
I'm here until the end
And just for you
I will fight and I will defend

Mi amas vin

I wake up but its all a dream
Cashin cheques on reality
You can't avoid if you cannot see
And you can't cash in without a salary

I'd imagine by now that the world would be flat
As lies to the weak is like *** for tat
Like this and that and Yin to Yang
Inseparable if its lodged in your brain

Like an icepick fits a lobotomy
Or the key to the locked monstrosity
The lack of hygiene to disease
I see strange **** while i sleep

Like balaclavas and white vans rollin
Free candy, kids stolen
Schools shut down by big bad guns
Trigger happy to be struck down dumb

Police enforcing, breach and clear
To clear the haze that fogs the mirror
What you see reflected is what lies inside
But brought out stronger, you can see it in the eyes

Cold and malicious, a job is a job
A cop or a gangster, ready to rob
At the end of the day, a life taken is crime
Evil changes host, it never truly dies

If i have no trust I'm sorry
But y'all lied when you said dont worry
Because i placed my faith and now its wasted
On a bunch of *******, evil motivated

The essence of the soul is a *** of gold
That can be exploited by greed unknown
A certain host, attracts moths to a lamp post
They find the fit and fill that hole

That void becomes your battery
A lifetime of crime without sanity
So here I lay, cashin in my salary
The reality that fuelled my vanity

There were times in my life
Where I was satisfied with the world
Now it’s different
Because all it seems to give me is hurt

A void in my chest,
Filled with nothing but emptiness
The same sensation I feel when I’m asleep
Or when I try to rest

It’s hard feeling positive when this life’s against you
It seems all it wants to do is grind you up, best you, bless you,
You’re probably far better off
Got the dreams and inspiration that keep you going and you can’t stop

So don’t
Don’t ever lose your faith
Because when you do you start to question
Your position in the human race

What am I good for,
Am I just for entertainment?
If that’s so, then why the
Element of overwhelming sadness?

I’m not scared, in fact,
Far from it
But it’s just sometimes I struggle
To cope with this ****

I deal with it alone
Gunslinging my way through
Drawing pistols, shots firing
Not enough bullets and I’m *******

I tried pistol-whipping my problems
But I couldn’t
If you’re down on your defenses then
You probably shouldn’t

Call for backup and extra munition
Do it quick and do it soon
Because I left it far too late
And sometimes I feel like I’m doomed

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

Talking helps to solve things
It helps to make me feel pure
It makes me feel good then
Doesn’t last long, it’s no cure

I do try to make it work,
But negativity puts in twice the effort
I was never positive to begin with
So I get twice the hurt

Sadness I can deal with
Because I can make it fade
All I need is a good song
On a cloudy, rainy day

I sing along to sad tunes
And let myself cry it all out
Afterwards I feel a bit better
And my eyes are in drought

So I go outside and smack my bag
The punching bag I have
I like to picture hated faces
When I’m feeling mad

I frame them for my anger
Because they made me go deeply through
And I hate being mad, I’d rather be sad
Is it the same for you?

I called out for help, took half a year to get
But better late than never whenever I feel really upset
I just write a little rhyme, a crazy song a bit like this
It helps at times when I look back and strongly reminisce

Other times it makes it worse, some things you should forget
And when I look back on them I drown in my regret
Some things I should’ve said, others maybe not
But at least I’m not like my other friends who blaze it away with ***

****, where’d that come from?
A well deep down that holds all the **** in this world that I know is wrong?
Sometimes I think that maybe I’m floating at the top
But my psychologist doesn’t agree, whenever I say that she makes me stop

It’s only a voice called Nightmare, my persistent inner critic
Who criticizes my every move, likes to make me feel like ****
He feeds off it, an inner demon set to self-destruct
Telling me everything I do is wrong, that it’s not just the world that’s ******

And I listen, but why should I?
When he asks me to Google tying nooses so I can just ******* die
And it’s only because, sometimes I feel I want to
But don’t listen to these voices, don’t want this to happen to you

I wanna write a goodbye letter sometime, just to have it there
Because if there’s something that makes me scared it’s seeing a loved one’s tear
So if I’m not there, perhaps it’ll make me feel better
I get told I can’t die, but never say never

Humanity has mortality and a lack of morality
Perhaps we all crazy too, insufficient in sanity
But just know, no matter what happens to us all it’s still reality
And you should always see the best in whatever is happening

I know I can’t, or at least I can’t yet
Those things I mentioned before, that drown me in regret?
That’s a part of my world, a part of my experience
**** it, what I’m saying is this **** is our existence

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

I hate my Dad sometimes, he makes me really ******
He has PTSD, takes it out on me and gets away with it
I mean, my step mum moved out, she saw it happen clearly
Did anybody stop and take time to perhaps think of me?

No? Just another waste of time?
A bad investment, a depression that took form and left its basement?
**** it all, I never helped anyone
That’s Nightmare for you, I listen to him when I write songs

He gives me inspiration in a way I guess I feed off him
But it can be difficult sometimes, to let him loose because he slips
Up and takes me down, ironically it’s why I’m writing now
To show you all that if you hear him, don’t listen to the sound

Of a desperate voice in desperate times, let him just die
Don’t even try to talk to him, give up let him cry
Don’t feel bad afterwards, it isn’t ******
It’s survival of the fittest and he’ll eventually wanna hurt her

You got a special someone don’t you? He wants their soul
He will play any card to get a chance to devour them whole
So don’t stop, keep your dreams
And let those pesky Nightmares slip by unseen

I hate feeling so down
But it’s all I have, a shroud around
Someone who questionably doesn’t deserve
To feel a pain so hard, to be quite so hurt

To feel this **** mad, or to be this **** sad
Is the one consistent thing in life that I’ve ever had
It makes me stop at times, and question my existence
But if this happens to you, shrug it off, be strong in your persistence

It may make you stop at times, and question your existence
But if this should happen to you, move along, be strong in your persistence

Where I can't

Slowly rotting away,
Piece by piece
Bones left to be picked at,
Festering meat; a scavengers feast

Go ahead and eat me
See if I give a f*
At this point in time
Killing me would be my best luck

I spent a long time
Looking over my shoulder
To see if I would be crushed
By the world's largest boulder

I spent a long time hiding
From what will always find you
Trying to block it all out
Trying to evade the truth

I am weary of always having to
Check my back
To make sure I'm not ambushed,
That I don't fall into a trap

A trap of re-enacting
The mistakes of my past
Because if I bring them back again
I'm sure to breathe my last.

I'm tired of being paranoid,
I could no longer care less if I fell into the void
As long as I don't drag anyone else down
I'm quite willing to drown.

So long as those I love,
Stay alive
And forget who I was
So they can't be tempted
To make the same dive.

I will die for my friends,
**** for them too
They may not want to see me go
But what are they going to do?

I cannot stand back at all
And watch them suffer from cruelty
I know what I am doing is right
Releasing said angel within me

I hate being so wary
Of the world that I am in
I hate the faces of the sinners
Their devilish little grin

So check my back, will you?
For I care not enough to turn
I may smell nothing but smoke
But I no longer care, the world can burn

So you say you're flying but deep down you're dying
Smile so crocodile I can sense you're lying

Plastic and fake prone to imitate
The snake in the grass leaves patience with Fate
Waiting too long and you got it all wrong
Singing sad songs to put the remorse where it belongs

Stay strong, head up, trust is a must
Don't violate the love by living like it's lust
Because once we are ashes there is no us
Just sorrow on the windowsill, filling gaps with dust

Mistakes will be made and battles will be won
You may win some but the war is not done
In the lulls of time we take time to have fun
And when its up in smoke we bare loaded guns

As we stand alone, so we live united
We take up arms and become divided
Withholding memories, we fight one sided
So we live our fantasies when the dogs aren't biting

Born for a purpose some of us never know
And as such we drag mangled cars under tow
We want to be remembered yet we all stay low
Want to live fast yet we all run slow

The hint is in the name but it's never us we blame
All praying for a change yet we all remain the same
A shame to run this, our Human Race
Ashamed to go out and reveal true face

Where are we now? What is this pain?
The mistaken take charge and the wise turn insane
We reach out our hands, but in spite we never grasp
The fingers lose grip and the numbers are cast

We take chance for granted as though it is not much
The coincidences we call luck eat you for lunch
I never liked this Earth and nor should anyone else
Yet I stand alone where my future needs help

Dumbed down we deal Death, a rigged trump card
From our very first breath until our very last
Peace amongst all is hidden in the chaos
Amongst the stars shine those who were misguided, lost

I belong to no particular place,
Have no particular purpose
So I sit down on the ground sometimes like
"Why am I so worthless?"
But I'm not, I got potential
Potential that's within me
By now you're probably thinking
I'm speaking like a scratched and broken CD
I don't like that I get sad
And I fucken hate being so mad
I think that it is wrong
To hate what little that I have but
I've been misdirected all my life, been guided the wrong way
So little things like rumours make me crazy
My vision gets all hazy and I ain't thinking straight
I should probably be focused on the events as of late
And the things more important in life, that deserve my attention
But when I stray from others they hurt, and that is not the intention
But no matter how hard I try, I can't make everyone happy
Smiles on faces, going places just to feel better about the differences within me

I want to be a good friend, but it seems that I just can't
And I end up getting mad and writing a poetic rant
I don't care anymore, trust is warranted
So don't ask me how I am
Because I trust no-one

We are the people of the broken
With words we've left unspoken
We died when we tried to live
We've nothing left to give
We threw it all away

The rain came racing from the storm
On divided lands, reborn
I saw the Sun again
She smiled and showed her face
Then grew shy and turned away

The clouds above let fall the sharps
The hail fell and killed the lark
I saw a puff of smoke
Then felt the death of hope
And knew something was, gone

I see it all the time
Every scar and every line
Every claw and every fight

And everybody knew
But no-one was to move
And overcast the night took bloom

We are the people of the broken
With words we've left unspoken
We died when we tried to live
We've nothing left to give
And that was a mistake

I felt a shadow on my shoulder
And felt the night grow colder
I could see clear as day
The resolution in her face
She couldn't stand the pain

A hand of anger gripped my soul
And I knew, for it was old
I'd felt this way before
Every time I left that door
My old friend Rage, I bring you forth!

We are the people of the broken
With words we've left unspoken
We died when we tried to live
We've nothing left to give
So we dig under our skin

A shallow smile upon my flesh
Red and tan, nice and fresh
Because it hurts to be glad
When all elements make you mad
And you're left to pick the trash

It burns to feel the cold.
Netted by it we've been, sold
Just another failed escape
Another rearing snake
Another goose to chase

I know how old this all becomes
For years now, I've grown numb
Opened traps and screaming pipes
This garden of delight
Easy kindling, set alight

The past comes up to go down
Painted clowns to hide the frown
I'm sick of this circus
Totally ******* worthless
Clueless to my hurting

And oh the beating heart of hate
Fuels the lungs of twisted fate
And now I'm finally free
Rid my mind from toxicity
I am human, watch me, bleed

We are the people of the broken
With words we've left unspoken
We died when we tried to live
I can't seem to give a ****
And now I've finally hit "**** it"!

I am a member of the broken
My battle scars prove that I'm hopeless
I wish all my pain today
Could finally be erased
Without me digging my own grave

I wish all my pain today
Could be left in yesterday
So I can finally get my way

I'm sitting, on my bed, I just woke up
Have to turn off my alarm, already stressed enough
I take it, feel the horrid taste in my mouth
As I make it drown, with the water that last night I left out

Flushed down, it should hold any second
I take a breath and
Ask myself the burning question...
Why the **** am I depressed then?

Flashbacks to times I couldn't sleep
Crying to myself, why the **** is it I feel weak?
Why the **** is it me? Why do I feel empty?
Hollow hearted, where has it departed, I feel so lonely!

Gaps in my memory and gaps in its effectiveness
I still wear a smile just to feel like I'm rejecting it
Placebo effect and pretend that I'm still proud of me
But see this shrouding me? You're **** right you should've doubted me!

Fifteen minutes of reminding myself I'm nobody special
It feels like ten years on Death Row
Berating myself, why aren't I better, why can't you hold hope?
A vicious cycle on a motorcycle, kick the chair and let go!

I still have thoughts of suicide
In the short time it takes for me to find my lifeline
Here it comes, thanks for the pickup
The only time I can say I'm thankful that I took drugs

Wanna know what I don't get?
I don't get mind-games based off of cruelty
Like, when two poems share one line
That being the only similarity.

Oh, and just because I dated this other poet
Doesn't mean I took her poetry
I didn't scam, take hers, make it my own
You obviously don't see clearly

So blinded by your little "mind games?"
"You're too predictable", she says?
Predict how long until I'm beyond reasoning
For you seem to have lost yours, when you have fun
Ruining another's days.

Thought we had potential friendship
But **** that, ***** you!
If you enjoy evoking anger for fun and games,
Then I want nothing to do with you

I was just walking home,
With my music in my ears
When I felt something odd
Something quite akin to fear

I turned and looked behind me
And my vision started to change
All I saw was darkness
Which to me seemed quite strange

In this darkness, a whisper of movement
I saw memories, both old and new
But I didn't see anything else
The darkness remained the same hue

But then I looked ahead
And everything I saw was bright
These things hadn't happened yet
But I almost teared up at the sight

I saw friends and family die,
But I saw them brought back to life

I saw arguments, hatred and tears
But I also saw victories, and cheers

I saw myself alone,
Writing poems by myself
I saw myself with friends
Doing this, then something else

Together to the end,
The definition of a friend
When I am left alone,
I cry out for them in sorrow

Then I returned to reality,
Shrugged my shoulders and just walked home
Because I understood what I saw
As I walked that road alone

There is no future in the past,
So put it all behind
Yet in the future there's always
Something new for you to find

Don't reflect on what you've done
Just live in the here and now,
And strive for the future
You'll be happy, this I vow.

I discovered all of this,
In just a few seconds of thought
Imagine what you could think
With the time that you so sought.

Snowed under
A choking blanket
This panic, this stress
Can't breathe
Can't think
No way out
Which way is up
And which is down
More importantly,
Who will rescue me?

They don't know me and they say they care,
How can you care when there's nothing there?
You may like me that's not enough,
You throw it to me but I don't trust

You say you support me, then why don't I feel it?
Face it man, the truth has you reeling
Say that you're there and then turn your back
When I bare the brunt while you cut your slack!

******* hell, there's one example
In this laboratory, here's the samples
Little bit of hate and a quarter of misery
Mix that **** and put it against greed

I'm not yours so you try and take me
Divide and conquer, not so you see
I'd face the world if all you wanted was death
You can pin that **** up on my chest

I'll die on my terms, **** your game
If you wanna die then just stay the same
You ***** and you moan how nothing will change
YOU DONT EVEN TRY TO REARRANGE

Call me depressed and call me ******
You're only checking two off of that list?
Try psychotic, try neurotic,
For ***** and gigs maybe tick ******

They're zooming around like planes in my head
Every time you speak everything drops dead
You set up a lie just to live it through
You start on drugs for something to do

I can't help, try helping yourself
Because you're not dead, just killing everything else
I had such hope and where'd it go?
Maybe up in smoke, maybe up your nose?

You're not stupid stop acting
You ain't no robot you've got feeling
I'm walking dead but I'm still bleeding
Walking dead and my heart's still beating

If I'm going down, I'll do it alone
Not when in surrounded by love that's grown
I'm falling down but she's still catching me
Just to pick me up and dust my knees

Maybe I'll get better I don't know
Everything in my head makes life seem low
Our difference is I know how I'll die
And it won't be because I let **** lie!

I first feel hyper
Then I sink low
Laugh at the sky
Then stare at the floor

Feeling beast
Then feeling small
These are problematic
But that ain't all

I get hyped up
A maniac outside
Then like a switch
I'm thinking suicide

Of course I won't do it
I know I never could, or will
It's just all up in my head
Like a ******* hype pill

I was once told,
"A wise man forgives
An even wiser man doesn't forget
Because how would you learn your lesson
If you never remembered?"

Something else that ties in with that:
"Experience defines who you are. If you never try, never succeed or fail, then you are truly nothing "

My life is meaningless right now, no doubt
It's dragging me along for the ride and I want out
Being a gentleman and acting with sincerity
Is laughed at from the sidelines, open eyes for clarity

Open jaw too, wide open I'm feeling crook
Like every inch of my soul was spilling blood onto books
And etching it's story there for everyone to see how stupid
The arrows shot from the bow of the cruel Cupid

It's ruthless, and he's shot me many times
I'm always checking my back scared because he's worked into my mind
It's not fine, draw the line to check the time
I'm here for the wrong reasons but all those reasons are mine

Second hand shop selling the single biggest ******
Thinking he's so smooth like dude you blind and can't see far
Use and abuse is what the bruises be telling me
And my heart aches, an earthquake seething with jealousy

You see me through a telescope with a double standard lens
Saying the only way you see us is merely as good friends
And that's fine but why do you have to play me like this
Twice now, no doubt you playin it's not nice miss!

Jesus Christ I'm faithless and playing tracks from the same list
The cold calculated sad songs preaching death wishes
You said it takes a while to make it to that, miss
But the first chance you get you're with my best friend, like **** me I'm being replaced quick!

You don't seem to quite grasp how much that fucken hurts
And the worst part of it is if you didn't tell me it'd be worse
Just drive me to my grave so I can rest in peace in that hearse
It goes by a cliff? **** it, chuck it in reverse

If life is a ***** then death is my lover
I kiss one hello and farewell the other

Embrace the darker spaces that lie within my heart
And reject the obligations that are bound to never last

Why can't you just leave me in peace, just leave me be
I'll exit one nightmare and enter a dream through sleep

Claw marks down the wall,
Lined with red
Music keeps me alive
But drives me insane

"I care for you!"
******* prove it.

There's never any greetings, only goodbyes
Never true happiness, only darkest nights
Whenever you fall quiet I'm the first to ask what's wrong
But when it comes to me, the silence stays strong!

Who is there for me? Do I really mean so little?
I go mad screaming at mirrors, slathered in my spittle!
I act out what I want to say, because of all the times
You told me, to tell myself I'm worth more than I realise!

Something of value isn't easily discarded
Something that matters isn't so quickly parted
I trusted in your words, they were my final hope
Now it's time for the hangman's trick to go and get the rope

So, a bit about me
You wish to know?
It is through me
That the poetry does flow

I have not much control
Over the words that I write
But apparently
My poetry
Causes untold delight (insert sarcasm here)

I write about struggles
And victories, proud and strong
And the defeat of the weak-minded
(Not really, but play along)

I have my own small way,
In which to tell the world
About my not-well-known poetry
That glitters like an emerald
(It's called Facebook, and Hello Poetry)

Not all my poetry
Is humorous, full of fun
Most are dark and sorrowful
But I write until it's done

Now a bit of me
You now know
It is through me
That the poetry does flow

(It's like magic, isn't it?)

With nowhere to run,
And nowhere to hide,
The bitter truth eats away
At my insides.

Trapped in a cage,
Lock hid away
Clock ticking down,
Day after day

I'm quite like a bomb,
Ready to blow
When time runs out,
Then time will seem to slow

Boom

Could it please be known that
Wearing a smile
Doesn't mean I'm happy?
In fact, quite the opposite
You have no idea how much it hurts
Just trying to get through a day

As it is hard to tell you how I feel
I'll tell you through closed lips
That I took a vow of silence
To prevent both mine and your embarrassment