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Nov 2017 · 621
As I Let You Go
Mister J Nov 2017
We stood cold and frozen in the rain
Raindrops hiding the tears you've shed
Heads are bowed low, hearts broken to pieces
Our bodies locked tight in a last embrace

Your breathing felt warm yet faint
Our minds went blank and confused
As much as we don't want to let go
The rift between us grows wider by the second

As I held your small, fragile face up
I can't help but stare at the fading light in your eyes
We just had to lean in for one last sweet kiss
Let the last spark of passion between us dissipate

As I try to let you go, you begged with dear life
As I struggled to resist your plea, I knew I wouldn't win
Even as I said goodbye, my arms were wrapped tight
Frozen in place with you in between them

With all the strength I had left in my heart
I turned my back to the sweetest memories we shared
But you desperately clung to every fiber of my being
I knew in my heart how badly I still wanted to stay

With all the voice you still had left
You screamed your final "I love you's"
I knew they're enough to make me turn around
But this time, we need to let each other go

As I walked away dragging my resisting feet
and I struggled to run away from your embrace
God knew how it crushed the life out of me
As I broke free from your heavy gravity

As I let you go, it took every cell in my being
Every muscle in my body rebelled against me
But because I love you with everything I have
Letting go was the only way to save you from my destruction

As I let you go, all memories of us surged like flash floods
Every smile of yours etched in my mind and heart
All of your kisses that I know I will never feel again
All those feelings broke out as tears fell from my eyes

I missed you every night in every dream
You haunted me in every way I couldn't imagine
Letting you go was my life's biggest regret
But to see you broken in my last moments, that I cannot bear

As heaven took my last breath away
Your small smiling face solely gave me ease
I know I won't be able to embrace you in this life again
So please wait for my return on our next chance
Stuck in a hospital on a rainy day. Was inspired to write this. :)
Oct 2017 · 330
Scarred
Mister J Oct 2017
The scars of what was
Left etched in the corners of
The heart you wounded
Oct 2017 · 1.2k
Closer by the minute
Mister J Oct 2017
Those simple, honest smiles
That leaves my lungs breathless
That noisy, heart-felt laughter
That leaves my chest bursting with joy
Those innocent, striking eyes
That render every muscle in me helpless
Those subtle, soft whispers
That feels like music to my ears
Your warm and fuzzy embrace
That I look forward to all day

They bring my frozen heart
closer to melting point
They make me fall from my heaven
fast down to your earth
They pull me closer by the minute
to wanting to stay with you
They give life to my nightly dreams
of getting pulled towards your gravity

I want to chase your heart
catch it and make it mine
As you chased mine
and made it yours
The world may be imperfect
but you are my taste of heaven
Everything may feel wrong
but you're the only thing that feels right
I won't ask for anything else
because I am content
of getting closer
to you
Oct 2017 · 374
The Song of the Fallen god
Mister J Oct 2017
For eons I have traveled alone
Wandering the stars and planets
For millennia I created and destroyed
I sought only perfection above all

I saw kingdoms rise
I saw empires crumble
I saw heroes born
I saw villains fall

Power was mine and mine alone
I was the master of my will
Lord of the invisible fate
I alone enjoy this divine existence

But loneliness still haunted me
My existence is my own bane
I guess even gods are vulnerable
When only chaos surrounds them

One day I descended to the earth
to live among the mortal souls
To manipulate with their fates and hearts
Business as usual for me

But in the midst of it all
The strings of fate were working
Pulling my heart towards
This unlikely twisted scene

There she was standing
A mortal soul who's beauty
Transcends the mortal to the immaterial
Then and there, I fell to the ground

Her auburn hair swayed with the wind
Her eyes twinkled of pure onyx
Her scent so sweet to the nose
Like jasmines blooming in full

The innocence in her heart so pure
The curvatures similar to a goddess
I wonder what I had in mind
When I created her to life

Who would have thought
that even gods would fall in love
Fate just made a cruel joke
But even so, I was meant to be here

I have seen it all
I have felt everything that is
Yesterday was a thousand years
Tomorrow is just the next second

But here I was, falling for her
The only time when a god
Fell in love with Mortality
Falling in love with her Humanity

Years have passed like mere seconds
I watched her age, her face becoming frail
Her body weakening rapidly
Slowly crushing my fallen heart

I know Death comes for her soon
and I know her life with me is almost done
But a life without her love is impossible for me
A gaping hole that even eternity cannot fill

I love her from the stars and back
I love her in my dreams and my reality
I loved her when I first breathed her life
And I'll love her still as I face the end of time

Her life is a blimp in the universe
but to me she was everything
I would trade eons of my existence
Just to see her smile again momentarily
Was thinking of a plot for a story. The story of a god falling in love came to mind. It feels a bit rushed for me but let me know what you think. Thanks. :)
Oct 2017 · 265
More
Mister J Oct 2017
Your perfect silhouette carved on my mind
Your sweet bedroom voice on repeat in my ears
Your addictive lips lingering on my mouth
Your alluring taste still stuck on my tongue
Your subtle brown eyes triggers a cardiac arrest
The scent of your sweat still clings to my body
That steamy night still drives me wild
How you hold me tight and made me yours
God, its not even the best part

Whenever we wake up
Staring in each other's eyes
Feeling each other's touch
Gasping for the same, warm air
Exchanging each of our breaths
As our eyes meet and linger
I can't help but fall deeper
****, you're so beautiful
Both inside and out
I'm in love with your smile
The smile that fries my brains
That laugh that electrifies me
Those whispers that bring me ease
God I want them everyday

More
I want you
More

More
I love you
More

Give me more of you
Let me fall deeper
Don't let me escape
Hold me tight
Cling and never let go
Kiss me slowly
Don't let me pull away
For a gasp of air
Have your way with me
Just give me all of you
I want to see only you
To feel only your touch

Be the best part of my day
The source of my desires
Make me yours everyday
Keep me addicted to you
Make me want for more

More of you
More for me
And as I love you more
I'll make you love
more of me
Just kept on typing what was on my mind. A lot of jumbled words.
Oct 2017 · 311
Magnets
Mister J Oct 2017
Whatever I do
No matter how I resist
I am drawn to you
Oct 2017 · 271
Outbursts of Depression
Mister J Oct 2017
What is this wretched feeling?
That eats all my happiness away
What is this weary feeling?
That secretly tears me away
What is this heavy feeling?
My chest being crushed by the weight
What is this dreadful feeling?
No matter what I do it doesn't dissipate

No matter how much I cry out
Nobody wants to listen
No matter how loud I scream
Nobody can hear my pleas
I feel like no one cares about me
Would you please help me?

Sometimes I just want to disappear
And take an adventure to a life without sadness
Would dying lead me to
A pain-free afterlife?
If Death greets me and brings calm
To my grieving, bleeding heart
I guess I won't hesitate
I just need to get out of here

Imagine that?
You still live in the flesh but
Your soul is way beyond rotten
And yet you can't do anything
But whisper it in silence
My heart pumps blood
But it never really is beating
My days go by without me struggling
Thinking about what to do with my life

I am depressed
It's no joke
I feel bad about me everytime
I see them getting somewhere
in this life but I'm still stuck
In the middle of
Nowhere

Can I really turn this around on my own?
I don't know what I should do?
I still want to live but everyday
I'm dying inside

I'm just depressed
I may also be insane
I don't know if I'm manic
Or just really anxious
So will anyone just sit down
And listen to me?

Listen to me?
Help me please?
Empathize with my suffering?
Hear me out?
Will you just stop?
And will you just
Listen to me?

Just...

Once..

??





I need help..
..
..



Will you help me?
From the perspective of a person suffering from depression
Oct 2017 · 289
Waiting Game
Mister J Oct 2017
As much as I want to answer all your questions
Be the only clarity amidst all the confusion
Be the light in your darkest prison
Be the guide in these difficult situations
Be the star in your unclear night sky
Be your comfort and your stronghold
Be the one who sees you regardless
Be your strength and your weakness
As much as I want to be all that

I can’t

But I have to
I want to
You need me to
I need this too

Because

I love you
I cherish you
I adore you
I yearn for you

So until I can be
All these things
You need me to be
Please wait for me
With all your heart
As I with you
Until I find the will
To say

I can
Oct 2017 · 518
Chained
Mister J Oct 2017
They cling to me
Those memories of smiles
Etched in my mind
Bringing nothing but sighs

Oh how my heart jumped
When you kissed me sweetly
How you brought me joy
Whenever despair plagues me

You were the love I wanted badly
All my life was yours to keep
You were the beat of my heart
The one that deprived me of sleep

Now only your memories remain
Even your silhouette left no trace
It pains me to miss you this much
Knowing that now you lie in another's embrace

I am chained to your haunting memories
Chained to the hurt that you've caused
Chained to the guilt I shouldered to endure
Chained to you still, can't get over your loss

I am chained to your lingering ghost
Chained to the prison of your past
Free me please from this shattered romance
Free me from the pain, Let me go at last

As long as I remained in your chains
And I carry these feelings that will go to waste
I won't get over our whirlwind affair
I'll feel the pain all over again as I yearn for your taste

Let me go, please hear my plea
Don't chain me to your toxic memories.
Oct 2017 · 454
An Encounter
Mister J Oct 2017
Come and play with me
Flash that lovely smile
and ****** my woes away
Make my heart beat wild

Give me an unforgettable rush
Take me to paradise and back
Kiss me viciously sweet
Like tomorrow never comes

Make me desperate for air
Let me cling to my life
As we go deep within the pleasure
And our bodies take control

**** me dry of all life
As I get addicted to you
Let your scent wash over me
As I go down on your being

Pull me deeper within you
As our bodies syncronize with the rhythm
Move like an untamed animal
With wild and deadly eyes

Let the pleasure consume us
As we **** our sorrows tonight
Moan like no one can hear us
And give me the memory of a lifetime

Love me just for tonight
Need me just for once in this life
Embrace me fiercely as we try to reach the end
Don't let go of my hand as we go to the ******

The sweat dripping from my eyebrows
The heat leaves me blank and dull
Your small body resting on top of mine
Both tired from that torrid encounter

As sunlight illuminates what hides
Morning reveals a stranger's face
This once in a lifetime encounter
Forgotten in a flash of daylight
Oct 2017 · 230
Rains
Mister J Oct 2017
The heavens cry lots
Raindrops falling heavily
Washing off my tears
Oct 2017 · 227
Speak up!
Mister J Oct 2017
Tell me what you want
Whisper them in my ears, dear
I'll listen to you
Oct 2017 · 392
A Timely Prayer
Mister J Oct 2017
Some things should be left in the past..
Some things should be lived in the present..
Some things should be reaped in the future..

And so I leave yesterday with all the agony I've felt..
I'll live today with all the hope and courage I could muster..
And I hope to reap tomorrow the love and attention I seek..

Dear God, hear me please.
2AM Thoughts..
Sep 2017 · 266
Cold Hearts, Warm Touches
Mister J Sep 2017
Winter coming soon
The cold embracing my skin
Seeking your warm touch
Sep 2017 · 229
North Star
Mister J Sep 2017
To you I will go
The only direction that
my longing heart knows
Sep 2017 · 282
The Sweetest No
Mister J Sep 2017
You don't even want to start
Asking me why I chose you
Even I don't know my own heart
It just seeks to be with only you

I may have come in a flash of light
I may be a new and perplexing maze
But no, I'm not backing down without a fight
Bloodied and bruised just to catch your gaze

So no, I won't give up no matter what
We may never even know what tomorrow brings
No, I won't put that gentle smile in a tight spot
I just want a chance to be with you, among all things

You don't know how much I'm willing to spend
Just to say no to rejection, to be with you in the end
My niece recently asked my help with her English homework. It was about sonnets, and it kinda inspired me to write one regarding my current thoughts.

Been a few days since my last write. :)
Sep 2017 · 380
Itch
Mister J Sep 2017
You're under my skin
Worming your way beneath me
Can't avoid your sting
A poem about an itch.
Something that won't go no matter what you do.
Just like someone who you can't just forget.
Sep 2017 · 295
Divide
Mister J Sep 2017
This space between us
I want to cross to get you
Screaming I miss you
Sep 2017 · 199
Melody
Mister J Sep 2017
The soft wind breezing
Whispering songs in my ears
Sounds sweet to my heart
Sep 2017 · 342
Iris
Mister J Sep 2017
The eyes of a man
Broken and tested in life
Tell lots of stories
They're windows to the soul
Mirrors to the heart
Books that need to be read

Another Haiku. :)
Sep 2017 · 314
Deep Stares
Mister J Sep 2017
I just can't think straight
Your eyes leave me blank in bliss
They stare right through me
They penetrate my soul
go straight through my heart
leaving me open to your charms

50th poem. A haiku too. :)
Sep 2017 · 1.2k
Kaya ko
Mister J Sep 2017
Nung ika’y umalis at lumisan
At ako’y iwanan ng tuluyan
Tanging sinabi sa sarili ko
Kaya ko ‘to

Nung nalamang ika’y nag-iisa
At ako’y pilit na nagpapakasaya
Sambit ng pusong nagpapalakas
Kaya ko ‘to

Nung bawat sakit ay pilit bumalik
Bawat pagkukulang at bawat pasakit
Tinibayan ang loob at sinabing
Kaya ko ‘to

Nung sumagi sa isip ang bawat alaala
Sa bawat ngiti at bakas ng ligaya
Pilit kong pinagiisipan
Kaya ko ‘to?

Nung ika’y hinahanap ng puso
Sinisigaw sa bawat pintig nito
Naguguluhan na ako
Kaya ko ba?

Nung nakikita kang masaya sa iba
At sinampal sakin ang katotohanang
Hindi ka na babalik pa
Kaya ko pa ba?

Nung napagtanto na ika’y mahal pa
At sakin ay ayaw kang mawala
Gusto kong isigaw sa mundo
Hindi ko kaya ‘to

Nung sa’yo ay nagsusumamo
Nakikiusap na muling maging tayo
Ngunit tuluyang binitiwan na ako
Hindi ko na kaya ‘to

Nung ika’y masaya na sa kanya
At ako’y nilimot sa pag-iisa
Tanging lumabas sa aking paghinga
Ayoko ng ganito

Ngayong tuluyan ka nang nawala
Bakas mo ay pilit hinuhugasan
Ngayon ko dapat isiping
“Kaya ko ‘to”

Sana’y makabangon na sa aking pagbagsak
Tumungkod sa sariling mga paa at ituloy ang landas
Pilit pinapaalala sa pusong nasawi
Kakayanin ko ‘to

Babangong muli sa bagong umaga
Gigising sa katotohanang wala ka na
Lalakad ng mag-isa kahit masakit
Lahat ng ito’y pilit kakayanin
Tagalog poetry. :)
Sep 2017 · 335
Smile
Mister J Sep 2017
Frustrations plague me
Bringing me down on my knees
Your smile brings me ease
Smile. It can lighten someone's day up. :)
Sep 2017 · 160
Breathe
Mister J Sep 2017
Sometimes I just can't
take the pressure
Sometimes I just don't
Know what I should do
Sometimes I can't identify
Who am I supposed to be
Sometimes I just need
A time out to think

As much as I want to
Run away from all of this
I can't just give in
I still need to find you

I just need to breathe
inhale some fresh air
Take a break and assess
What happens next
So wait for me
As I think of a way
To get away from here
And come get you
To take you in my arms
And bring you to
Our share of paradise
Just some jumbled words in my mind that I needed to put somewhere.
:)
Sep 2017 · 323
Empty Space
Mister J Sep 2017
It's 4am now
Still no trace of you in bed
What did I do wrong?

I miss you each night
This bed feels cold without you
Come back to me please
Suddenly woke up in the middle of the night and I can't find myself sleeping again.

Here's two haikus. ;)
Sep 2017 · 326
Shadows on my Wall
Mister J Sep 2017
Heavy eyes slowly closing
Breathing gradually easing
Mind gently relaxing
Body surely falling
Reality falling asleep
As dreams come into focus
Old movie reels sweetly playing
Nostalgic as an autumn midnight

The darkness silently creeping
My friends are on their way
Laughing in my mind
Grinning all the way
Can you hear their fiendish voices?
Can you see their glowing eyes?
Do you hear their ghostly whispers?
Do you see them here tonight?

Meet my oldest friends
The shadows on my wall
With their hands cold as ice
And their eyes red as blood
With smiles of ghastly grins
And voices of shrieking glass
As darkness begins its embrace
Here they come at last

The shadows on my wall
My demons coming for me
My playmates in the dark
My addictive insanity
They’ll come and drag me
Bring me to their twisted paradise
And play with my shattered psyche
For a very long time

The darkness constricts my breathing
My nape cold and frozen
Chills running down my spine
Fear finally gripping in
Nightmares talking to me
Screaming and shouting at me
I can't get a grip of reality
Here comes the impending insanity

Save me from them
The shadows on my wall
They come for me tonight
And eat my sanity alive
Save me please
Cut these sinful bindings
As they drag me to
The hell and grave I opened
Here's a piece about personal demons.
I'm having some of them and the ideas came flooding in.
Talk to a friend and don't keep them to yourselves
Sep 2017 · 557
Linger
Mister J Sep 2017
Your silhouette stays
Even when you're gone from me
The pain still lingers
Thoughts running wild..
Sep 2017 · 510
Hidden
Mister J Sep 2017
Hidden in this heart
Are my feelings kept from you
Should they be revealed?
Haiku #13
Sep 2017 · 389
Jokes
Mister J Sep 2017
Sweet little laughter
From these half-meant jokes of us
Makes me fall truly
Haiku #12
Sep 2017 · 826
Mandela Effect
Mister J Sep 2017
That steamy weather
That moist air
Your addictive kisses
Your lingering touch
Your mesmerizing eyes
Your porcelain body
Your seductive curves
The way you hold me
And cherish me in your arms
The way you smile at me
And how it takes me away
How it blew my mind
And dulled my senses
I wish I could press rewind

How vivid it was for me
Everything you made me feel
And yet how come I alone
Have these memories of you and me?
Went to the weird side of the internet, found this "phenomenon"
****.
Sep 2017 · 259
Rain
Mister J Sep 2017
Rain drops at nighttime
Bring calm to my weary soul
Come cleanse me tonight
Its raining outside tonight. :)
Sep 2017 · 378
Dreams and Nightmares
Mister J Sep 2017
My dreams are whimsical tastes of happiness
Dreams of holding hands while walking in the cold evenings
Dreams of a perfect life with no signs of loneliness
Dreams of you sleeping in my arms in the warm mornings

My dreams involve every inch of your being
Dreams of your tight embrace and addictive kisses
Dreams of your warm breath while sleeping in cold nights
Dreams of being with you all my life, basking in your light

My dream is you and you alone
Without you in my arms is a nightmare
A nightmare that I pray never comes
A nightmare that I hope doesn't become reality

A life without your love is a nightmare
That I pray I don't wake up to one morning
Sep 2017 · 794
Ocean
Mister J Sep 2017
I sit alone in front of the campfire,
My eyes glancing at the dancing flame
Imagining life without my only desire
And for my loss I'm the one to blame

In my slumber, I traveled back in time
Locked in a nightmare, I longed to escape
My mind haunted by the sound of the chime
And a cold chill grasps on to my nape

A Dream or Reality? I asked in despair,
Hoping that this is all in my head, all this fear
I just want this gone, I didn't even care
Just remove this curse in me that only I can hear

Moments of torture and hatred suddenly disappeared
In the back of my head I thought, a moment of peace
Yet the night grew darker, and my hope was shattered
A ghostly maiden from my past, weakened me with ease

Salvation was out of sight,
I choose to stay and fight,
Yet the shadows held me tight,
But no longer will I give in to fright

With all my strength I struggled to get free
And ran away from my haunting past
Insanely, I ran as my life flashed before me
And I was wondering, redemption at last?

I jumped towards the sky, pleading for it to take me
I felt invincible, untouchable, full of power and strength
And with one final battle cry, I plunged into the sea
At last, freedom came to me with one last breath

My life is an ocean, full of sadness and pain
Yet within its depths I found eternal peace
Within the underworld my soul sleeps and satisfaction I gained
As fast as the waves of the ocean, all my agony released
6 year old poem. An old piece. One of my first writes.
Sep 2017 · 263
Journey
Mister J Sep 2017
Life is a journey
And the greatest mystery
Is how you found me
Haiku #10
Sep 2017 · 473
Crossroad
Mister J Sep 2017
Lonely travelers in this long journey
Meeting at the crossroads of fate
Lone souls looking for companions
Hearts looking for their heartbeats
Curiosity sparkled from bright eyes
In them resides an adventurous light
Take my hand as we walk this road
Where should we go in this uncertainty?

Warm hands and soft kisses
Make us both feel at home
This time I know I’m not alone
Holding hands on this path with you
As long as you’re here, I’ll be fine
As long as I’m here, I’ll save you
Let’s see the wonder this life offers
As you and I traverse this road together

Where do we go now?
What should we do?
That I have no idea
But in my dreams
and in my hopes
As long as I’m with you
It doesn’t matter where we are
Or what we'll see
As long as you see only me
And I see only you
To those who seek partners in this journey called "Life"
Sep 2017 · 300
Just You
Mister J Sep 2017
In my mind and heart
All I cherish and adore
Its just you dear love
Haiku #9
Sep 2017 · 238
Marks
Mister J Sep 2017
Even when we're done
No matter where we are now
Your marks are on me
Haiku #8
Sep 2017 · 256
Regardless
Mister J Sep 2017
Whatever I do
I can't help but fall in love
With your broken heart
Haiku # 7
Sep 2017 · 310
Bright Lights
Mister J Sep 2017
City lights glowing on the horizon
Busy traffic bustling the wide roads
Chatter and car horns blaring in unison
Worn out souls coming home from heavy workloads

Bloodshot eyes feel like popping out
Insomniac born from hundreds of sleepless nights
Demons inside me scream and shout
Pleading for a taste of freedom just for tonight

Dim irises reflect the sorrows felt inside
Fake smiles can't hide the dead soul behind
Please tell me how to cross this wide divide
Let me feed your lust, heal the ills of your mind

Come with me now, its do or die
Let's go away and find our northern lights
Come now, don't be afraid, no more alibis
Let's be free from our woes, just for tonight

Fallen angels in search of a paradise
In this dreadful hell people call Life
A place of solitude just for us will suffice
A sweet serenity in this lifetime of strife

Let your kisses be my addiction
Let your breathing be music to my ears
Let me consume your lustful affliction
Let me dive and banish your silly fears

Let me loose myself in the city of angels
Let me bask in the glory of its bright lights
Let my demons burn from the touch of angels
Bring me to where you are and calm my sighs

You are the bright lights in my dim existence
You are my soothing calm in this endless storm
You satiate my longing just with your presence
In this midnight love affair all of me you've restored

Morning sunlight shines its rays on us
Warm blankets wrapped around your curvatures
The storms in our eyes gone in that quick rush
Vanishing in the dust in our one night adventure
Inspired by the music of Thirty Seconds to Mars. :)
Sep 2017 · 188
Longing
Mister J Sep 2017
The lonely heart sings
It seeks to be where you are
To be by your side
Haiku #6
Sep 2017 · 295
Twisted
Mister J Sep 2017
What happens now?
The world is in chaos
Man is on the brink of war
Nation against nation
People against people
Kingdom against kingdom
Faith versus faith
Culture versus culture
Where should we stand?

What happens now?
Society is crumbling
Morality has been blurred
Injustice is prevalent
Power brings corruption
Opinions are silenced
Man against man
Woman against woman
What should we do?

What happens now?
Guns do all the talking
Missiles are launching
Bombs **** innocents
Weapons define supremacy
Money spent on war
Children joining the fight
Instead of studying hard
Will they be alright?

What happens now?
Money controls everything
Technology deviates attention
The poor get poorer
The rich are insensitive
Society swayed by false media
The truth left in ignorance
People aren't complaining
Will there be a bright future?

What happens now?
Our children are in danger
From our stupidity today
Color defines who we should be
Love is taught wrong
Vanity is glorified
Kindness is shamed
We all know what else exists
What else can I really say?

What happens now?
Our governments are deaf
To our cries for real change
When everything else crumbles
They suppress truth with lies
Rise up, people who see
That chaos reigns today
We need to have that changed
When do we start?
I guess even this twisted world can give some inspiration to writers. ;)
Sep 2017 · 341
Driftwood
Mister J Sep 2017
Why do I exist?
Floating along time and space
Where should I be now?
Haiku #5
Sep 2017 · 328
Wake-up Call
Mister J Sep 2017
A cool August breeze kissed my warm cheeks
The sleepless night grew silent in anticipation
The ivory queen sat majestically upon her throne
with her children spreading out the sky like fireflies

The city skyline glowed splendidly in the night
The cold mountain breeze swayed the sturdy trees
Only my black, hooded jacket keeps my body warm
But I guess it’s enough as there’s no one to embrace me

My bloodshot eyes felt weary of all this agony
This shattered heart tired from all this distress
All insanity restraining my mind suddenly gone
My head cleared from years of being in the dark

That dreadful pain stopped after years of aching,
That deep **** that never closed ceased bleeding
A sense of peace suddenly brings my mind to ease
Absolution finally came from those daunting tortures

This youthful love I nurtured for the past 5 years
The one where I gave my all just to keep it going
The love that made me hundreds of sleepless nights
Everything I held on dear was cleared as a big confusion

Yes I was hurt, and yes I still suffer from the pain
Yet what can I do if this is the truth I’d yearned for?
Truth I’d always wanted to gain for my own freedom
Freedom from all the heartbreak I’ve endured until now.

My heart endured a lot for the past few years
I know she’s moved on and faced a better future
She loves someone else so dear to her, it pains me
But still, that’s how love is, as it had been for ages

I guess this is my final goodbye to past heartbreaks
Where this girl tried to love me as hard as she could
The girl I passionately desired to forever stay with me
Yet she found love in a different person better than me

So for her well-being, and for my own sake too
I’ll have to learn to live without her in my life
It will be hard at first but I guess this is for better
She’s done it before, so I guess this is my wake-up call

For this night, I finally sleep with a smile on my face
With a spark of hope lighting up in my battered soul
The kiss of the morning sun gives me a new will to live
The thoughts of waking up to a new day, warms my heart

Every day I hope that love will find me again someday
Waking up to a new day feeling much better than the last
Learning to accept the truth as is, as each new day passes by
This fear of getting hurt again decreasing in each new morning

Moving on is a hard task to do for a young heart
Yet as time goes on, pain makes a heart grow mature
But stay strong, because fate will find a surprising way
to mend your broken heart, and wake you up to a new love
Old piece. Free verse. Inspired by real events and a real person in my life.
Now that I think about how much of an Emo I was back then, I can't help it but laugh. :D
Sep 2017 · 2.1k
Hiling
Mister J Sep 2017
Ilang linggong puro nakaw ang sulyap sa'yo
Ilang araw na walang hinangad kundi pansinin mo
Ilang beses nang nilalapitan at pilit na nagsusumamo
Ilang beses pa bang magpapapansin para sa atensyon mo?

Hindi ko alam kung saan ako magsisimula
Hindi ko rin alam kung lahat ba ng ito ay tama
Ang tanging pinanghahawakan ay ang lakas ng loob
Ang aking hiling ay tanging maging sa'yo

Sa bawat araw na hinirang ng Maykapal
Sa bawat pintig ng puso, ngalan mo ang sinisigaw
Sa impyernong ito na ating ginagalawan
Ikaw ang tanging langit sa aking buhay na kawalan

Ako'y sa'yo, nais kong malaman mo
Ako'y sa'yo, sana'y pagbigyan ako
Ako'y sa'yo, hayaan **** ibigin kita
Ako'y sa'yo, sa lungkot at sa ligaya

Tanging sa'yo, lumipas man ang mahabang panahon
Tanging sa'yo, sa bawat pagdapa at sa bawat pagbangon
Tanging sa'yo, magunaw man ngayon ang mundo
Tanging sa'yo, at sa'yo lamang ang puso ko

Ikaw ang ilaw sa madilim kong landas
Ang parolang gabay sa bagyong malakas
Ikaw ang laman ng damdaming puno ng lakas
Ikaw din ang kahinaan, ang pag-ibig na wagas

Tandaan mo na kahit saan man mapunta
Kahit saan mapadpad at ako man ay maligaw
Sa libong tula at liham na aking isusulat
Tanging ngalan mo ang laman, tanging ikaw

Ang gusto lang makamit ay ang 'oo' **** matamis
At mamahalin kita sa habang buhay ng labis-labis
Hindi man perpekto, magkaron man ng mga mintis
Basta't ikaw ang kasama, lahat ng problema'y matitiis

Ako'y sayo, aking uulit-ulitin
Ako'y sa'yo, ika'y kukulit-kulitin
Ako'y sa'yo sa hirap at ginhawa
Ako'y sa'yo, dahil mahal kita
Second Tagalog poem. Feels a bit rushed though.
Sep 2017 · 303
Yours
Mister J Sep 2017
I wake up each day
With only you in my head
Why doesn't it stop?

I've never felt this
Strange in a very long time
What's wrong with me now?

I think this is love
It just took me by surprise
How could I face you?

I want to be yours
I just want to deserve you
Is it just too much?

I hope to be yours
Wishing you will be mine too
God let me be hers

Let her see my worth
Let her realize this truth
I am hers to keep

I love you so much
I can't stay away from you
I am yours only
Compiled Haiku-style. Yours to enjoy. 5am thoughts. :)
Sep 2017 · 329
Mirrors
Mister J Sep 2017
How come when I look
To see who I came to be
I feel its not me
Haiku #4
Early morning search for the purpose of my existence. Haha
Sep 2017 · 299
The Search
Mister J Sep 2017
For all my life I've been searching
I've tripped, stumbled and I had lost my way
For all these years I've been yearning
I was fooled and blinded looking for the one to stay
For all the broken hearts I thought I could endure
I stood up, picked up the pieces and restored what remained
For all the tears that fell before I grew and matured
I tasted and swallowed the pain more than what I could sustain

Someday I know I'll find someone
To share this burst of life we all possess
Some way I know I'll get to where
I could come give you my love and caress
Somehow I know I'll get my chance
To prove to the world that I deserve your love
Someday I know I will find you
The fallen one sent for me from heaven above

The search began when we were apart
The search bore fruit when I found your heart
The search ends when our love begins to start
This search for the belle who scribbled her name on my heart

I think I found you.
Sept. 5, 2017, 4AM.
:)
Sep 2017 · 310
Changing Seasons
Mister J Sep 2017
As the sun chases the moon in perpetual cycle,
As the ocean currents swirl in endless uncertainty;
As the winds come and go to wherever it pleases,
So does the heart changes its color constantly.

The young heart opens up like a flower in spring,
Gentle yet cautious, budding yet reluctant;
Love nourishes it like mild rays of sunlight,
Like an innocent child, forgiving and repentant.

As the days go by the heart slowly blooms,
Nurtured by love and care, by trust and faith;
With emotions growing in each passing moment,
The heart takes you deeper in its natural state.

When summer arrives, the heart becomes passionate,
As torrid as the scorching sun, driven and consumed;
Like a flower standing gloriously, beautiful and lively,
With all doubts and hindrances, all barriers removed.

Love is at its strongest yet most vulnerable phase,
Raging like a dangerous storm on a path of destruction;
When passion can inflict a wound with one wrong step,
Everything starts to fall, piece by piece into abolition.

Like the leaves of a tree shedding in autumn,
Hands slowly slipping, Love barely breathing;
The heart rapidly descending into paranoia,
shrouded in fear, in weakness and uneasy feelings.

Then the storms come to topple what was left,
The heart in a whirlwind of emotional disarray;
Which is why men has also called  the autumn ‘fall’,
because love falls, turning to animosity, hate and dismay.

Winter knocks at the doors of a cold heart,
Where it is on its deepest, most isolated chapter;
Where bitterness stings the like an unbearable venom,
the heart frozen in pain, growing ruthless and harder.

As the darkness creeps in, seeping through the walls,
The cold air suffocating, the temperature intolerable;
The snow growing thicker in the absence of warmth,
The heart stands still, its walls becoming unbreakable.

But amidst all the angst and the sorrows one bears,
The seeds of hope will never leave the young heart;
It wouldn’t abandon those who love purely and faithfully,
And it opens the heart once again for a brand new start.

Like the seasons of the year the heart needs change,
From passion to bitterness, from uncertainty to trust;
Like a rose in the middle of a garden, it needs to endure,
The changing phases of life, to learn and adapt, it must.

One day, the young heart will learn and mature,
Stronger and more passionate than it ever will be;
Then and there, God will grant it the love it yearns,
For it has learned to sacrifice and love unconditionally.

These are the different facets of the human heart,
Like the changing tides, it shifts and morphs suddenly;
It is wild, full of life and hope, like an untamed lion,
And it loves fiercely, unpredictable, and passionately.

Love naturally comes in a flash of light,
so one must learn to endure its sudden impact;
That's why the heart must change repeatedly,
To prepare it for uncertainty, not to be pushed back.
Old write. Enjoy :)
Sep 2017 · 184
Insomnia
Mister J Sep 2017
I can't sleep tonight
Thoughts running wild in my mind
They don't want to stop
Haiku #3
Sep 2017 · 602
Slow and Steady
Mister J Sep 2017
Don't stare at me with teasing eyes
Don't stir my feelings with playful smiles
Don't stiffen my muscles with soft touches
Don't leave me blank with inviting kisses
Don't melt my heart with warm breaths
Don't give me a rush with that passionate wanting
Don't give me a reason to desire you even more

We don't want a relationship filled with abuse
A relationship where wanton rage reigns
We don't want a love that turns into poison
A love that becomes ****** and repulsive

As much as I crave your every taste
Fall for your game, let no time go to waste
Breathe the same gasps of air with you
Freeze time whenever I share it with you
Rushing into your arms for the rest of our days
As much as I want to be with you this instant
Let's take the pace slow and steady
Instead of a quick and brittle love affair

Let's build a quake-proof connection
An affair with strong and sturdy foundations
Where our desires can freely be expressed
And our love meant to protect and caress
Just us indulging in our passionate wanting

I don't want any compromise for building "us"
I want a slow but steady path towards you
I will wait even for a long time, even if its a must
I don't care about how long, I simply desire you
You, the one belle that caught me by surprise
The one belle that drives my dreams every night
For that one belle that caught me by surprise,
The one that drives my dreams every night. ;)
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