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Do not go far to listen to the praises of my heart
Listen to your heart
— the praises come from there —
I am there.

Do not go far by your actions to call me to yourself
Come closer
I am not far from you
By your voice, I shall hear.

—JIBRIL ABDULMALIK ©2019
mia 5d
I hover over fractured water
the porcelain compels me to lean closer

"I am not lovable"
I am not here, I am not there
You will not find me… Not anywhere

I have not run away, I have not disappeared
I am close. I am closer then I appear

Not sure how to type what I feel
When all of these feelings just make me feel so lost and ill

This is not a rebellion. This isn’t out of frustration
You are not the enemy; I have nothing against your radiation.

In the night I have gone like the wind
But I am alive and well, this is not out of sin.

I am not gone, just hidden away for a while
You know all my locations, all my places, you know my style.

I could be anywhere, but you know where I go
I am not gone; I’m just no longer home… I’m solo

My number code now a mystery, but you know my accounts
You know and have more then what you realize. You have the amount.
You know my people, you know my spots
Although I am physically cold, my heart is burning hot

Forgive me for the pretty little lies, and for my acts and stories
My wrong, my bad, I am sorry. I greatest my apologies.

I am not fooling around with strangers, or with the fools of this earth
I am safe, and I am close by. I am not shutting you out, I’m building my own turf

Watch the black now fade away, the spikes dim and become dull
For I am independently going on this journey on my own, it’s quite the hull

I’m sick of disappointing, I’m sick of the back and forth, I want to truly know
Jesus in the desert for days, Moses on the Mountain, and Elijah with the birds sought Him alone.

Days, and weeks of isolation, alone with Him.
I want to know!!! I Need to seek and find!!! I am so sick of guess’n!!!

As far as I can tell, this is God’s leading, and if it isn’t, He can work it all out
I won’t know until I take the first step into this unfamiliar world. I promise I am safe and sound

Trying to be discerning, and wise with every step I take, as far as I can tell
I can’t hear him when many are shouting. When too many feel the need to yell.

Not abandoning the problem. I’m not abandoning His Call
I am looking for peace and answers. I want to be his Princess. He won’t let me fall.

I don’t hate you, there is no anger or disappointment in this heart
I swear I leave in peace and love, for I am hurting with this part

Dad, I know everything you said and did was only out of love
I know you didn’t mean to hurt and scar me, so I hid my scars with gloves
I know I disappoint, but I contain no anger. I need a moment and time
To ask and then receive, and to seek what I am trying to find
Answers

Mom, you are wonderful and beloved, I’m sorry if I made you feel so worried
I promise you; I am fine and safe and treasured and in good care. Please have no fury
I loved working alongside you and doing what I could to help
You did so much for me, and prayed like a warrior, breaking every spell
Blessing, that is what you are ♥

Rachel, it’s time for me to be trained on how to be a woman of service
I am on my knees like I’ve seen you done so many times. I’m encouraged
I’m sorry… But He has shown me his leading… So, I am just walking forward
I may not know where it takes me… But I swear it is HIM I am walking towards
Boldly

Dennae, I am praying for you and the things you struggle and ache with. I know the look
I’m going to miss your *******-up phrases and your unintentional jokes
But I need to go on a journey with my Savior for a while to know Thy way
He will change your heart, and your desires, you keep seeking His face.
Everything will change when you pray

Amy, I am sorry, but I tried to do what I could to be there for you
I tried to be the big sister I needed to be. I did what I could so you could see Him through
I love you little one. He has an amazing job planned for you ahead.
He has not forgotten nor abandoned you. Because for you, he bled.
Remember His Love

You can come, and see, and visit! You know where you can stop by
I am not dead; I can assure you, that I am very much alive.

Take care of my baby fluff, and the fish down below
Trying to follow His leading, and not drench myself so low…

Time to grow up, time to discover and learn.
He is the greatest teacher; He will protect me from the fires that burn

Gone indeed… But to really seek and discover what is in store
Alone and Solo, I depend on Him to really speak and show. My body on the floor

Don’t be worried, scared, or frightened, for I am in good hands
I love you; I miss you. You are not locked away from my stands

From the darkness, I escape, but only to seek the light
Forgive me, my beloved family… but I need to take this step… I’ll be alright

I may have crossed the line
But I know as long as I seek Him… and Surrender to Him, He’ll make everything fine…

Till I can see you again, Beloved Family
April 13, 2019 - 1:00 am

My Move-Out Poem Letter to my family before I left...
A M Ryder Feb 27
I am stone
I do not move

I take my time
I let him come closer

I have only a single bullet
I aim for his eye

I hold my breath
My finger presses on the trigger
I do not tremble

I have no fear
Pandora Feb 21
If i could go back in time
would my mistakes always haunt my mind?
step by step; i'm closer every day
Tomorrow seems a million miles away
TIIIIMMMEEE TRAAAVVVEEELLL!!!
JOURNEY WITH ME TO THE DEPTHS OF MY MIND
mjad Feb 1
It's been a month and a half
Since my eyes laid on you last
At first you're nothing much
No hard abs or glowy tan
But you grow on my vision
The more I stare
I wonder how you would look
Standing not as far as over there
rin Dec 2018
“Ever-shining star,
so innocent,
yet so bizarre-
how do you shine so bright?”

well,
if I told you,
that it’s burning-
hot, vile and untamed
would you still really love me,
the same?

bright light,
glowing your day.
my pulse,
steadying your nerves.
if I told you, I wanted more,
would you run away?

like the stars in the sky;
so lonely, yet so near,
is it selfish, to want to be…
closer to you?
[the star waited for an answer. but how silly, it must've seemed, when the moon decided to kiss the star's forehead and laugh. "it doesn't matter, as long as you keep shining for me, I'll always be here for you- as well"]
Johnny walker Dec 2018
Trying to remember the time I last held her In my arms the last time I kissed her sweet tender
lips
The last time held her real close, the time I looked Into those beautiful blue
eye's
The the last time I felt her sweet breath on my body, last time she laid softly her head on my
chest
The last time I felt close to Heaven was the time I held and loved her , the last time I  felt the love and her passion
Is the closest to Heaven I've ever been, A Heaven I so clearly remember
Never felt closer to heaven than Helen you were laid In my arms
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