the moment i saw you,
i knew all rules
had to be broken,
just so you can be **mine.

i just want to sleep peacefully
and never wake up.

it's time,
to move on,
and forget and forgive,
all the mistakes,
all the regrets,
because if we carry
them for the rest
of our lives,
we will die with
a burden on our hearts.

change can be good,
change can be bad,
but eventually change
comes,
and if you aren't prepared
for it,
it might leave a mark
on you.

today,
i heard that you had
a bike accident.
you hit your bike
into a **** tree.
what were you focused
on, that you didn't
notice a **** tree?
maybe it was her.

she always catches your attention,

and this is the part
where i realize he's
not even worth my tears
or the scars on my wrist,
his eyes are not worth
my pain, and his
sweet smile isn't worth
my sadness.
                                         *but everytime i look at him,
                                          this feeling appears, where
                                          i can just leave my world for
                                          a second and enter his, where
                                          i feel almost infinite standing
                                          next to him, where all i wanna
                                          do i hold his hand and kiss his
                                                               thin lips.

01.00am--                                                                    
she is sleeping peacefully,
dreaming of him in an alluring dream                                  
that she knows will never come true.

02.00am--
she is now fully awake,
sweating in her wet clothes and
sweat dripping from her forehead
due to the nightmare she just had.

03.00am--
why can't she fall back asleep?
the horrifying dream is still a clear
image in her twisted mind.
she needs him.

04.00am--
all the numbers are written,
the only thing she needs to do is press
the green button on her phone
and call him.

05.00am--
he was *******, to say at least.
nobody wanted to be awaken by a stranger
in four in the morning.
it was a mistake.

06.00am--
she still hasn't fallen asleep.
she stayed up all night.
she couldn't bare to have the nightmare again.
and now she has to face reality.
she hates it.

07.00am--
her makeup is applied.
and her clothes are clean and perfect,
as they always are and should be.
how is she going to face him after
she called him in four in the morning?

08.00am--
she couldn't find him anywhere.
she knew where his locker was,
but still he wasn't there.
she was now worried that
perhaps she was the reason for his absence.

09.00am--
she couldn't hold it in.
her tears fell and fell on the hard ground beneath her.
she couldn't believe it.
he was gone.
and it was all her fault.

10.00am--
she ditched school.
she didn't care about that anymore.
all she wanted to do is be with him.
and that was what was she going to do.

11.00am--
she watched as the blood slowly started
dripping from her newly cut wrist.
she held the tears and the pain in.
she didn't let out a sound.
soon her lifeless body will be found on
her bathroom floor.
but at least, she would be with him.
and that was all that mattered to her.

You whisper to me,
"How would you describe us, baby?"
I take a long look at you, eyes filled with desire,
and I say
"You are simply honey,
the one that's raw,
the one that warms your lips and tickles your tongue,
the one whose taste you'll remember, but still long to taste it again 20 years later.
You're the honey that I don't want to, and neither I can, remove from my lips."
You're stuck in between my teeth, love,
sweet and irresistable,
that's what you are.
There's no other honey in the world like you, you know?
Even those dark eyes of yours
resemble a dark colored honey.
They sparkle and dance while you're gazing at mine
and I can't help but smile.
"But, long story short,
this is the way I would describe us:
You? You are the most delicious honey that has ever touched my skin.
And I? I'm just **** allergic."

12.00pm--
now she was floating
in thin air.
she couldn‘t see herself
because she was not
even there.

13.00pm--
she barely heard
the police siren in the
far distance.
she could feel her ghost
slowly separating from
her bleeding body.

14.00pm--
all she felt were hands,
number of hands touching her,
all over her body, examining
her like she was a science project.
she didn't like it.
but soon she was going to be with
him, and that's what calmed her.

15.00pm--
finally, she was finally gone.
she didn't exist anymore.
all she was now,
was a spirit, while
her lifeless body was in
an old coffin.

16.00pm--
before she went and saw him,
she wanted to know how her
mom was holding up.
she certainly didn't expect this,
her only daughter to be dead.
nobody did.

17.00pm--
she saw him.
just a glimpse of him,
but still.
he was here, with her.
finally, they were together,
where they truly belonged.

18.00pm--
she was now in london.
she left the rainy and dull
germany and went here.
she was just a ghost,
she could go anywhere
she wanted.
after a long tine, she was
happy,
whatever that meant, now.

19.00pm--
she hasn't seen him.
she was exploring the world,
but she could sense something
was missing.
it was him.
and she would do anything
in her power to find him.
after all, she killed herself for him.

20.00pm--
he still wasn't found.
she didn't even know where she was,
heaven or hell?
it didn't feel like any of those.

21.00pm--
she was torn.
this wasn't heaven.
nor it was hell either.
it felt like something,
bittersweet.

22.00pm--
she went by her house.
she shouldn't have.
she saw her mom,
crying her eyes out on the
dinning room table.
she felt quilty, for once.
and she kept watching as
her mom screamed and cursed
at the world for her daughter‘s death.

23.00pm--
it wasn't in her nature,
but she gave up.
she shouldn't have,
but she was worn out.
her death, her dying,
was a mistake.
but she realized it a little too late,
and now it was impossible to
turn back time.

laughing at nothing
specific,
you said you could
swim the pacific.

i didn't believe you,
of course
and that's when you
headed for the doors.

i laughed harder,
at your blunt escape.
but you thought
that this was a date.

i gave you a
disapproving look,
and you stared at me
until your hands with
mine hooked.

you kissed me out
of the blue,
and you smiled against
my lips because you knew
it was true.

and i realized that
with a couple of drinks,
you can do a lot of
brave things.

i siт неre,
оn тнis old
вus seaт,
neхт то тне
dirту window,
drunк and нigн,
analyzing and тнinкing
aвouт нow мiseraвle
and fucкed up му
life is,

and тнis вus is eмpту
and sтill driving,
and soмевоdy нasn‘т такеn
тнis seaт nexт то ме,
and мayве,
iт will sтау тнат way

he is confused;
because he is unaware of her miserable ways to make him notice her,
because he does not know why does she keep being nice when he is constantly mean to her,
because he is planning ways to see her and he does not know why,
maybe he is just losing his mind.

she is confused;*
because she does not understand how can he be so blind and stupid not to notice her love,
because she keeps being nice to him even though he keeps being a ****,
because she is always trapped in his net, whenever she is around - he is around.
maybe she is just crazy.
__
soon enough they will both realize that love does not exist in this cruel world and go separate ways, until they meet each other again..