As I sit here we see what's lost
I also think of the cost
Though not lost but merely stored away
Knowing I'll stop being sad someday
We tore each other apart like hyena to prey
I wish that was all I had to say
I wish you loved what your worth was
Because I've seen your glow and what a buzz
One you don't take as a drug, one you soak in
But I don't think that's what you were sellin'
I swore someday's were my hell
But to you I couldn't tell
Captivated by your victims widow
To help you get strong, but not to kill me though
You need to have more self conviction
For something good not to sate addiction
For you sit upon a golden throne
But here now being a sense of all alone
You need to find that little you is hurt
And learn to find self comfort
Take care of you before you find a host
Your face is that of a ghost
Lost in expression of attachment and shame
Being pressured by self blame
The only advice I have for you
Is to only change the choices you do
Because the real you is always there
Waiting for you to take her hand and adventure
I wish my words to be of encouragement
But to bring light to your inner happy sentiment
I know you have the power of choice
But one more time, believe in me and rejoice
For you know the power of my words
Flowing like Sheppards to herds
Truth in my every breath
But I'm blind to your meth
Flawless in deliverance and passion
That make me start lashin
A regret I carry like a scar on my lung
My neck sore from always being hung
But I can't let this overcome my compassion
That I have to give, here, I cash in
I can't be a comparison anymore
I'm sadly, strongly, powerfully closing this door
I repeat once more because I know
That this will help you go
That I wish you the absolute best
And you are capable of facing your test
But remember that you can't give slack
Because you might tumble back
You need faith in your solitude
You'll find life in mind and passion in mood
I do not mean to appear rude
I say this calmly with no attitude
I say this lovingly not prude
You truly can be loved my past love
Know your grandmother sees you from above
Making another sick joke to you
As words of encouragement of what to do
Find love, get lost, go run around the world
Don't wait up please move on from me
Take what you've learned and go see
That there is so much better out there
But what I do know and dare
Is that I know this door will be unlock
If you find yourself going amok
Just don't abuse this right
Just go, don't knock, please find new light. -Lo
we counted the lady bugs
& sang to the trees
i love you, you love me
the night was ours
& we held the stars
in our palms
the clovers stained
our hands green.
the beat to our dance
thrived in our feet
spring was the harmony
melody in buttercups
round & round, song
in our lungs.
a dose of summer
reddened our skin,
quickened the pulse
night of lady bugs
in blackened mind.
His name was eby,
he was like her teddy.
Far away was he gone ,
and made her feel so lone.
To be back together she wished ,
his kisses which she missed.
Thinking of the happy times she lost ,
remembering it was pain that caused.
Sleepy was his eyes ,
yet she found them nice.
For hours they talked ,
together they walked .
So beautiful their life had been ,
with nightmares not forseen .
He was an elixer to her,
meeting him was an err.
Then she was all broken,
with nightmares she was woken.
was as if she was stabbed into the heart without a miss ,
thinking what she had done to deserve this .
She felt all crushed,
with her tears all rushed .
Forgetting was more pain,
so wiping her tears in the rain .
Brightly then the sun shined,
chucking away her thoughts in mind.
Moved on like a boss,
'cause an ass she was .
It was 6:00 PM
when you tear your way out of my rib cage,
and the night sky was bleeding cherry red.
I wanted to ask you to stay, but I didn't.
I was afraid that your skin will no longer recognize my touch,
that your body, your mind, and your heart were no longer mine to claim.
You vomited "sorrys".
You tried to kiss away the pain,
but the war had already left me broken before
it even started.
It was 6:00 PM
when time decided to stop breathing
and the universe conspired
to break the world into fragments
in order to keep us forever apart.
Since then, every day feels like
I've been living in our memory lane--
a different dimension
My mind has been shredding love letters
But there were times when my hands are missing
the warmth of your skin
so I just write and hide you in my poetry.
It was 6:00 PM
when I realized that gravity anchored my body
to the same ground
where you left me.
And I feel empty
It's Friday and now I'm on my half leaving you.
I realized that the more I tingle on you the more not a human I am. Like a falling star, such a beautiful to saw at the beginning but when I try to reach your tip, you're gone and left me wondering whys. All at once we were mad, hopelessly in love. And we're hoping to cross the intersection (joke, miles.) but Heaven knows to better not. The wound sticks of tears and broken paths and become our own death song.
Now I'm on my half leaving you. when I say I'm leaving you, it means I'm no longer flinch at your name even though when someone recites your name, still a part of me not fully recover. I cage my own rib firmly and one day, I put it on the right lion.
I have a big heart and someday, someone will capable to run the same floor with me, sharing the same universe of thoughts; wild, soft, raw, and tender. I know, those are the fantasy while I'm half leaving you.
And this, so on forever, I will get to love better on give and give, and receiving more than the refusals that came from my own mattress, and soon to be found by someone who proves the refusals are wrong.
While I'm on my way.
On my half leaving you.
Sa dinami-daming tao sa buong mundo
Bakit ikaw pa ang nahuli ng malalaking mata ko?
Iniwas ko ang aking tingin sa iyo
Sapagkat napansin kong ang aking mga titig ay kanina pa sayo nakapako
Tumalikod ako't nagdarasal na sana sa paningin ika'y mawala
Dahil kung hindi, ako'y siguradong magkakasala.
Sa aking muling pagharap, nandoon ka parin sa iyong tinatayuan
Hindi ko na natiis kaya lumakad ako papunta sa iyong harapan
Tinanong kita kung bakit ika'y nandoon pa
Sabi mo naman ay may hinihintay ka
Nainis ako't tinulak ka papalayo
Subalit bumalik ka nanaman sa kung saan ka kanina nakatayo
Ang isip ko'y naguguluhan sa iyong ginawa
Sa pagtayo, hindi ba ka talaga nagsasawa?
Kinulit kita hanggang sa ika'y maglaglag sa lupa
Ngunit ang iyong utak ay nakatulang parin kasama ang mga tala
"Sino ba yang hinintay mo't nakatulala ka diyan?" Yan ang aking tanong
Hindi ka sumagot kaya ninakaw ko ang dala mong bagoong
Tinitigan mo lang ako't naghintay na naman
Sa taong kahit pangalan ay hindi ko nalaman
At mukhang sa aking mukha, ikaw na'y nainip
Nagsalita ka na may halong pagkagalit,
"Bakit ba ika'y naririto pa?
Hindi mo ba napansing gusto kong lumayo ka na?
Pag sinabi kong dito lang ako, dito lang ako
Kulang nalang, ang aking mga paa'y aking ipapako.
Hinihintay ko yang kaibigan mong pinapahintay ako
Tangina, kailan ba talaga iyon sasagot ng oo?
Alam ko namang hindi mo ako tutulungan
Baka itakwil mo pa ako't ipaligaw sa lansangan.
Kaya dito lang ako
Hanggang sa sasagot siya ng oo
Kahit hindi man ngayon at baka hindi bukas
Maghihintay ako hanggang sa aking mga buhok ay malagas."
Sa sobrang haba ng iyong sinabi, isa lang naintindihan ko
Magiging martyr ka dyan hanggang sa magsasalita ang mga aso
Bakit ba ganon kung makipaglaro si Kupido?
Hindi mo rin ba napansin na ako yung nasa harapan mo?
At sa lahat pa nga naman ng pwede mong magustuhan
Napili mo pa talaga ang aking kaibigan
Ano nga ba ang meron siya na wala ako?
Sabagay, siya naman talaga ay isang perpekto
At ako'y isang babaeng kapatid ng isang demonyo
Maganda siya, maputi at napakabait
Mga bagay na hindi ko magawa kahit anong pilit
Kapag kaming dalawa'y kasamang maglalakad,
Parang ako ay isa sa mga natulungan niyang kapos palad
Lintek naman talaga buhay to o!
Kailan ba ako makakahanap ng taong magugustuhan ako?
Baka sa aking libing, oo, tama, tama
Sa ayaw at gusto ko, lalagyan nila ng kolorete ang aking mukha
Baka pag kanilang tititigan ang mukha kong ito
Mahuhulog sila sa akin kahit wala pang isang minuto.
Bumalik nga tayo sa kung saan tayo huminto
A, oo. Doon sa kung saan sabi mong iyong gusto ang kaibigan ko
Isa ka pa sa mga manliligaw niya
Sana, kahit maliit lang, magkaroon ng aberya
At kung kayo man talaga ang magkakatuluyan pagkatapos nang mahabang panahon
Sana maging masaya kayo't huminto na ang pag-iyak ko ng ambon
Ay, drama. Sige, okay lang naman talaga
Handa akong magparaya para sa kanya.
Kapag ika'y tinanggihan niya balang araw
Pumunta ka sa amin at sana'y hindi ka maligaw
Patatahanin kita hanggang sa hindi ka pa makakaiyak pa
Pangako yan kaya ipasok mo yan sa kokote mo ha?
Tumalikod na ako't inisip ang iyong galit na mukha
Sabi mo nga, kung doon ka, doon ka
Napangiti nalang ako't inisip ang mga pwedeng mangyari pagdating ng panahon
Kung kayo man talaga, masasabi kong iyan ay dahil nagparaya ako noon.