I fell
for my
own
assumptions
of you

Shrug it off darling,
all birds
need to fly
some know
their way back
others
find new ones..

Shrug it off..
some birds might
stay and dance
with every
shrug..

It knocked on my door
the cracked door the guarded
the core of what I call home

I have glued it so many times
sometimes with cheap adhesive
others, I thought I'd be artsy
and used gold
maybe something broken can be beautiful
or so I thought

It was cold outside
do you think that's why it knocked?
It wanted some sanctuary some ****** heat?

It knocked with all its might
I was alone inside, enjoying my aloneness
with glue, sticking together the remains
of time

"Go away"
I screamed, I knew who it was
the door was shaking with every pound
the core of this chamber was vibrating
rippling fear, well it's not fear per say
but something I've felt before
something familiar

"I don't want you here"
I yelled it the same way
I'd say it to a returning lover
******* and your doings

The wind blew and blew
and the pounding escalated
so did my screams

I can foretell what it wants
from the pounding
I can feel it again  
just like how a song can ignite
feelings from the past
just like a cologne can time travel you
to that moment, on that street
I know what it wants

Suddenly the pounding stopped
so did the nostalgia trip
I came back to reality
with a glue stick in my hand
and a shard of glass in the other
"caution fragile pieces can cause bleeding"

My mind was not completely at peace
curiosity kicked in, OH LORD IT DID
I jolted to the door
and peeked from the peep hole
there it was, in a raincoat
standing there, looking back at me

Frantic, I felt my knees weaken
the mind sparked some logic
but the heart, that stupid heart
embraced everything else

"Let me in
I miss my home, I miss the warmth
I can see that you glued the door
the one I jolted from
the one I cracked and broke"

I was scared, it was fear this time
mixed with bits and pieces of adrenaline
"I know this feeling, I know it"
I recounted in my head, making sure
it was engraved in my thoughts

"but if I do, it's different now
this house is no longer a home
it's cushioned with protection
glued with experience
decorated with time
and fortified by mental rationale"

It knocked again
like an angry lover
aching to touch his woman again
like an insane human
coming off of his prozac

"It's time, you're rotting
from the inside, I know your beauty is eternal
but it's time you let me in"

Tears ran down my cheeks
I do miss the feeling
of sweaty palms, of butterflies
that feeling of fading into one
of smiling, of pausing time

But I do know that if I open that door
I will be the
person
to throw him out again
breaking
my cracked door
starting from scratch

What do you think?
Should I let him in
this
time
around?

or shall I wait
for the person
who comes jolting through
burning my door with passion
surprising
my core?

I let my guard down
and showed him my skin
full of freckles
I let him connect the dots
creating constellations
each with a story
that he narrated

I let my guard down
and showed him my flaws
galactic bruises
thanks to my clumsiness
and let him float in each one
marveling at the purple and blue

I let my guard down
and showed him my bashfulness
as it colored my pale cheeks red
and imprinted goosebumps
everywhere...

I let my guard down
and showed him the ways
I like to sin..
having my fuzz stand in salutation

I let my guard down
and showed him the other side of me
the one basks in the nature of things
naked, bursting with energy of the sun
emitting sultry rays that
brighten his eyes in astonishment

I let my guard down
and showed him
myself
full fledged
imperfection
put together in a beautiful way

I let my guard down
and showed him how my piercing eyes
move waves of emotions
in his gut

I let my guard down
and waited to see
how he will
enjoy such
a mystery
feeding
my kind of
curiosity

It goes beyond
the voices in your head
to tap
into the
beats of your heart
reshuffling
your
plan

Your kiss
shunned
all the rest
to shame
made all the lips
tasteless
and  
turned tongues
cold

A blind man
can s e.e
how
I
feel

I have never
heard my thoughts
sing so loudly as
they did when
they went dancing with yours
in complete and
utter silence
the moment
your eyes
landed on mine

I breathe
I see
I feel
I yawn
I am alive

I shake
I stress
I moan
I grunt
I am here

I believe
I cry
I touch
I react
I am fine

I caress
I claw
I spank
I bite
I shake
I am ecstatic

I rest
I dance
I walk
I strut
I even run
I am healthy

I drink
I smoke
I talk
I hug
I like
I love
I am still here

I speed
I lash out
I headbang
I folk dance
I hold your hand

I fall
I stand
I tip toe
I walk in circles
I slide

I glance
I enjoy
I fight
I sit back
I sacrifice
I befriend
I help
I think

I write
I sing
I narrate
I block
I break
I create

I am blessed

I was seduced
by that plump apple
a symbol of poison or temptation?
but who says seduction has a
negative connotation?

I was standing there
eye-ing it across the smoke filled space
red and full
a true vision of beauty

It was very inviting
in a way that was deathly silent
Yet I bit my nails
in anticipation
of taking one step closer

what if it's deceiving?
what if it's just called sinning?

My heart pushed me forward
I felt it within my ribs
My mind pulled back
it always worries

what's a human to do?
stuck in the middle
between these two?

Knowing the nature
of curious humanity
I took a step forward
and took a bite

It filled my mouth
with sweetness
one that imprinted its taste
in my memory
for years
to come

Did I sin?

Why does my mind
race
without running shoes
to exhaust the
thought of
over-thinking?

I have always worn
my heart on my sleeve
and now,
summer
is around the corner
sleeves are no longer worn
and my heart.. well
it's torn...
between where to be shown
or should I play
a game and leave it
in the unknown?

Rock me gently
to the memories
of yester-past
as they leave your mouth
with nostalgic melodies
that tuned my days
with smiles

Run your hand through my hair
and untangle all sense of doubt
it won't be easy, my hair is curly
knotted and messy
and your fingers will have to smooth
them, to make their way to the end

Slide your hand up my spine
and enjoy the ups and downs
of every vertebrae, leading all the way
to my shoulders, broad and standing tall
they had to be, always.. for you
but sometimes, they did sway

Silhouette my curve
and familiarize yourself
with my body, the one that screams
"woman", and not "just for fun"

Cup my face
with hands whose past
vandalized your image
with graffitis of hate
and feel as my cheeks
burst with heat, the kind
that warms the coldest of moments

Lock your eyes on mine
and drown in the well of feelings
I have held for so long
I have circled it with beautiful blue hue
just to cover, what's been there

Slowly slide your fingers
down my neck, where my nerves
would melt for your lips
they would shut down their impulses
and bask under the soft feeling of your kiss

Rest your hand on my chest
and tame my heart that's gone wild
unsure of reality, it just reverted to insanity
my ribcage can only hold so much
my heart remembers, my heart feels
rest your hand on my chest
and feel the cracking noises of a once broken heart
glued together for someone special
maybe with potential, but this heart
was always careful
and beat for no one the way it once did


Make your way to my belly
who was starving for attention
days and nights alcohol infused
hoping you'd tell me I look pretty

Embrace my waist
pull me closer,
a big bang is in the making
I feel the energy burning
the stars are shooting
everyone's wishes are coming true
the world is anew
there's unexplainable energy
in your finger tips
on my skin
in our eyes
I feel it
going in circles,
orbiting ....

"I love you"
it slipped, you said

Open your eyes
look at the skies
a new universe
has been created

Here's to the poems that never made it
I will forever smile in your memory
clandestine

Your kisses
are snowflakes
that fall on my skin
like delicate lace
and slowly melt
as my passion
heats
for
more

Sometimes the rambling
of your thoughts
in the middle of night
alone
is the only music you need
to keep you company
till dawn!

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll strum the strings of time
to echo vibrations from someday
till today

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll rearrange the stars
to spell "yes, they are!"
because it's truly bizarre

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll ask the moon how he copes
with the sun, every time he rises
and she sets

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll get the jar of wishes
and plant them in all of
my today's, my everyday's

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll lie on your side
and listen to memories of your breaths
and let them carry me into
deep slumber

Someday
maybe one day, he says
this roof will expand
to meet the ends of the earth
to be big enough to fit all our dreams

Someday
maybe one day, he says
I'll erase all dark days
and force the sun to rise
to new better days

Someday
maybe one day, he says
will be
"the day"

A poet's curse
is the thriving
on extreme emotions
for what's a pen without ink?

I bit my fingernails
to the bone
only to understand
the pain
that my pencils
have
withstood

My body asked my soul
to take over
surrendering to what
age has imposed on it

My ears heard it from afar
that beat, those repetitive
jolts of energy
of life

My hands answered
and lifted themselves
in the air, that fresh
sweat infused air
my hands reached out
to the beyond
to the stars
they felt all that toxic poison
in that body released

My legs
stomped all that compiled wrath out
on that ground
merciless
free

My hands
my legs
my body
let go
to the beat
that's calling me from afar
from around the corner of Thursday
till the end of Friday
all the way till the dusk light of Saturday

Call me and I shall answer
I am here, I await my therapy
my stomping like a mad tribe member
of the modern world

Call me and I shall scream to the heavens
and shake the stars above
let them hear my "freedom call"
let them know that I
right now
belong to my original instincts
I am dancing with the contemporary cult of today
those going around in circles
no right or wrong
just here and there
up and down
exchanging powerful hugs
of energy from one intoxicated soul
to the next

The sun god is hypnotizing
us to dance to greet him
the beats, oh the beats
they get higher and higher
the energy is reaching
a ****** to numb
all mankind

Guilt free kisses to boys and girls
that beat
it's the heaven's calling for us
the heaven's begging up to let go
and become one
under the
sound
of
Music

Floating
poetry
is simply
a conversation

Words
paper cut
my skin
with unspoken
emotions
for my voice
failed to give
them their
proper justice

My paper
ached to feel stories of you
on its pages

yearned to taste the adventures
you had with my heart with every
curve of a letter

and craved to vicariously
enjoy the pressures of pleasures
on it's blank slate
every time
you trace bedtimes
stories up and
down my spine

I excel
at the sport
of
fal
(in love)
ling

Break away from the things
that change who you are

Pull the reigns
on your recklessness

Ride through your days
back upright and shoulders straight

Look ahead
squint and let your sight
pierce through your horizon
the vision of your illusioned future
that's as blurry
as your
eye sight

I  collected dust
over the years

They filled my hands
with worries and fears

Today I threw them
to the skies
they turned to stars
that glittered away

.

Elegance
em(b)odied
by natur(e)
(a)stonishes
the so(u)l
of every
s(t)anding
e(y)e

I saw a storm
brewing
I could have
easily stepped
over it

But the raging winds
the piercing rains
and you
were just too irrisitable
and the calm I was in
was too
stable

I used to look
now I see

I used to crush
now I love

I used to hug
now I embrace

I used to rage
now I engage

I used to jump to conclude
now I skate to it
taking my
time

I used to fall in
now I rise to
taking you
with me

I used to blush
and
I still
do

Actions don't dictate my behavior
let me latch onto the next bottle
sitting across my vision
settled, calm

Let me drink and word *****
on your shoes
leaving a stench that will remind
you of the hazy days
spent, boozed up

Let me smoke till my lungs
beg for a molecule of oxygen
to freshen it's dank corners

Let me wobble on the sidewalk
reminding my feet which one goes first
let me sway, cursing whatever
injected my heart with a dose
of forbidden feelings

Leave my vision of tomorrow
the same, swallow the the changes
like an unwanted gag
drown it with that burning liquid

Let me be, as if the next encounter
is just seconds away
let me
be

Dear Mugger,
I hope you are doing well
and that amount you withdrew from my card
is being utilized to your benefit.

I just want to thank you
for putting me through the ******* on a Friday night,
at 12:35am.

I want you to know that
I had no idea my anger can reach such great heights,
or even such a caliber.
Adding to that, my voice wow my screeching voice
made the rats rattle in the sewers of the city

I hope that pink wallet treats you well
along with all its memories
that might seem like just paper to you

I hope they crawl out of that rectangular purse
and paper cut their way to your throat
I hope they leave a mark on your skin
just like they have on my life

I hope every moment
engraved on a piece of paper
in that wallet
cuts you so deep so your heart feels it too
just like mine

I hope my family pictures
burn marks on your chest
so you can feel how much warmth
they give me when I am alone

I hope my sister’s lucky charm bracelet
embraces your wrist so tightly
that it clots your blood
and hey it wouldn’t fall off

I hope the note my grandma wrote me in 2005
rests on your face
covering it, protecting you from evil
like it did for me
and in the process
suffocates you with all its love and might

I hope my ID cards
melt in your hands
so you can feel the burn of my presence
the impact that I have when
I
AM
AROUND

I hope my bank card
slits your cheeks
so you know that smile I have
at the beginning of every month

I hope

I hope, dear thief
that my wallet gives you a taste
of life,
the life I have
and poison you with how much
I am
blessed and you
are not

****
you!

It all began
with a gaze, then..
a thud knocked on my valve
disrupted the blood flow
constricted it
jolting my own chamber of life
with a new life
foreign to my heart
to my being
I opened all 4 rooms
and welcomed it with open arms
warming the cold chills
that have overtaken
it over the years

A constriction that
turned my face red
and made my lungs ache for air
as I took a deep breath
to fill the void
I inhaled your aura
and it nestled in
the center of my being
turning it into
a warm
home

Once upon
a time
I listened
and my story's
plot
thickened

I have never enjoyed
the rain as much as I did
the night I bumped
into you
walking adamantly
to a destination
that I wished
conjoint
with mine

Ready?
(takes a deep breath),

Jump, the heart told me

eyes closed
serene smile...

I am a sucker for
               F
              A
             L
               L  
                 I
              N
               G
             (IN)
             Love

I have so much
I want to say
so much
                I want to write
a lot more

but I find myself
day
  d                          m
          r          a           ­       i                g
                e                  n

w­atching       it              all            like             a               movie

My vision
seeks you
like an
escaping sun ray
through a grey
cloudy sky
clear
and bright

I always showed you
how I shone
under the sun
but you never noticed
what happens
when I melted