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Karijinbba Jul 2018
The night under the mirror
went through a revolving door.
~~~~
Eventually I did put a face
to  your loving cues your emails
It had been so long since your destiny had asked you my King
to marry her
that hunting jealous day that began much earlier under a 1975 degree celcious and did burn us to a crisp
Nothing would have given me more assurance more pleasure  such a gracious challenge to a  mysterious
proposition to dig my heart
for the final blow
one queen for his other
prior queen bee me
Karijinbba
and a winner I would have been
all night with my King
under the mirror!
to obliterate her wedding band
from his hand
how loving of you cupid of mine
always digging at my heart
for my heart of gold
then came cause and effect of karma blowing up our plans
another King Brad appeared with roses and diamond ring
in hand he had no mask just an hidden agenda
he took my children to his Mom
to make his other queenjealous and I took the bate
for just one hour both my King and Brad
had chosen he same photo E-mailed among several
to both single men seeking bride at Kiss com.
my lovely picture was the same summer dress I wore with the king I loved
as someone something from above and beyond
mirrored the scene in my life a kind of cause and effect
it showed my
old beloved a simple approach to a woman's heart
and me that the woman he married giving her a diamond ring taking her and son to his Mom was more to make
me jealous too fight for his love
an invisible revolving door had opened up
both to win my lover back
or to lose both Knights
fate life karma G**
had bid the greatest game
of love and twin souls
remained split bleeding
both men found a way to another
woman playing their game  

I was sent to worship my Lord Jesus Christ mocking me
beware of Karma
or THINK and get rich and happy
to catch a true king FOCUS
don't take bates, don't settle for new when the heart is taken 
by a true love not followed.

My king was found by his mate
and I returned Brads diamond
lesson played leasson learned

Then came the clock ticking
tax collector King Mr Time
he took my hand
paper INK and pen
to script a new
poem
its Winter he said,
HOW DO YOU
WANT ME TO KISS YOU?
and a new revolving door
appeared here at H.P.
~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
Copy Rights
ASG/BBA -revised 6/2020.
How do you think a and how do we feel about the one we truly love a nail can't take another out its the heart that will break and the loss is an unsurmountable abyss beware open your eyes FOCUS one single thought two hearts that beat as one cannot distract nor settle and never take a new lover if our heart loves another
Karijinbba Aug 2018
Love Story byAndy Williams
'Unforgetable"
"I'll Be Seeing You."
"Can't get enough of your love"
"Are You Lonesome Tonight."
I'll Make Love To You"
"What a wonderful world"
Red red Wine
At Last.
"Yesterday" J.Lenon
~~~~
[ Nathan, Joseph-Pat-Rick ]
Close your eyes, make a wish
And blow out the candlelight
For tonight is just your night
We're gonna celebrate,
all thru the night

[Shawn Pat.Rick, J Paul Taylor ]
Pour the wine, light the fire
Guinevere your wish is my command
I submit to your demands
I will do anything, Karijinbba, you need only ask

[ Joseph-Paul-Patrick-Richard]
I'll make love to you
Like you want me to
And I'll hold you tight
Angelina-babe
all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to

[Wanya, Shawn, Pat-Rick]
my true love AnKarijin,
relax let's go slow!
I ain't got nowhere to go
I'm just gonna concentrate on you the whole night through
My Kariginny are you ready?
it's gonna be a long night.
Throw your clothes (Throw your clothes) on the floor (on the floor)

[Shawn Wanja, Nathan, Pat-Rick]
I'm gonna take my clothes off too
I made plans to be with you queen bee mine Karin whatever you ask me, you know, I could do

[Angel'Q Karijinbba Chinny Chin]
I'll make love to you too
Like you want me to Rickie babe
And I'll hold you tight
My baby Pat
all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to!

[Wanya,Shawn,PatRick, Nathan:]
Angeli'q Babychin
tonight is your night
And I will do you right
Just make a wish on your night
Anything that you ask
I will give you the love of your life, your life, your life
love of my life.
~~~~
Boys To Men: For:Karijinbba.
start 54-(74-95)-05.end.
This songs I choose to play on my HeadStone...when I die.. To all the man who sang and danced with me.
even if it was only a Scripted love. sigh..PLEASE DON'T LAUGH BECAUSE WHEN I WAS DONE HERE I LAUGHED SO HARD MY TOMMY HURT;so did my daughters.
Karijinbba Jul 2018
My twin flame here I am
Do with me as you please
I surrender to you
Other women complain asking
you why do you love me more then them and you replied...
"why do I not love any of you like I love her?"
"If a blind woman and one who sees are together in darkness, they are the same.
Light comes, the one who sees will see light. The blind one
stays in darkness."
I am yours beloved I see your light my teacher my guru Sage twin flame my everything!
Caress me dance me oh sing me
Lay with me among the wild
flowered fields and bunny meadow prairy land
Spread you my wings I am
in full array near our nudist hill
My Adam your Eve
Or skip this previews
just take me now
Touch me taste me
Climbing becoming one we do our Macchu-picchu mountain each time we touch
many a mountain we shall climb
I won't ever let you down
Reciprocate my lover
I am your true love
I've been waiting for your scripted promises of old for decades to manifest.
Help me bridge this old gap bridge the chasm with
a leap of faith
Help me come out of this world of unreality our old prenuptial script lets jump into life
Let me spill my heart to you
Spill yours and play some nice music no more sad songs
Its sunny and beautiful outside
What a wonderful world
Loving the outdoors
Loving you loving me
Lay me down under the sunny
blue sky by day, let the pine tree aromas after the heavy rains to heighten and sharpen our senses
the evenings long.
Let's lay us both down
under the pomegranate trees examining their sensual hanging fruits that get us so high
Feed me your ripe fruits
I so hunger for you love.
Embrace me gently or grab me
download yourself into my hybrid vessel your inter galactic antivirus, lets wait untill dark falls for the stars to blanket us all night long I am your star seed
ENTER ME the evenings mornings long.
You raise me up like mercury on a thermometer pumping me
Earthquaking me
Fireworks crackling us
Volcanic booms exploding
with each pump fly me higher and higher raise me up, and up
You are the perfect lover
Protective husband amazing father
To this truth I surrender to you
Mate with me jump into Karijinis's hole fly us a honeymoon trip to Australia.
Protect me from the wild beast there here guide me make me into your own image God of love heart of gold like me!
King of hearts
here I am your Queen bee 2
glued together baby two
plus eight more!
There isn't a tree a rose a
Hilton hotel a Travelodge
A Laundry's restaurant
a garden a mountain
Paris Egypt Australia Africas starry sky
Not any place on Earth
Where I can't find you
You are omnipresent in my world even crossroads and street lights define you
You love like I do your eye moves are my own!
your smile is my own!
There isn't a Space Center rocket
Not any Star System
That won't remind me of you:
looking at me, waiting
Longing praying
for me to understand you.
You were the only one who
truly loved me just for me!
Everywhere I look I see you
I died amnesic in Greece and Veracruz there I wished I was never born
we all have our ways
of jumping off cliffs.
I fell into the abyss and I died again when Nasus answered phone in our home in Kemah
saying you two had a son!
I believed her lie
Lover of  life!
Giver of life
Love of my life
Lord G* heaven i missed you all my life
I sing and dance for you
Lord son of G
omnipresent
miss you my E.T divine
I surender to you
do with me
as you please.
rdd/pjc I'm bba/asg
remember me as
something very
dear and precious
you promed me
my true love
I love you adore you forever yours in
mind heart body spirit soul.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
All rights reserved:
excerpts from my first memoir
Aplicable {1974 through 1995-
up to 2006) sorry we didn't change the world where rich
marry poor
and women not men rule
no more wars
no more wars!
Karijinbba Aug 2019
My Mayan Cross: DEATH/TRANSFORMER
is Karijinbba's
Mayan birth chart
character, traits blessings gifted upon birth

So, Karijinbba/ASG

"Your Mayan Cross is comprised of six integrated, archetypal energies (also called Nawals, Day Signs or Day Lords) represented by Mayan glyphs and numerals from the Mayan sacred calendar. According to the Maya, this is your cosmic blueprint, your energetic signature, your personal Tree of Life. It is used for mapping one's life towards a destiny aligned with divine cosmic forces.

The energies of the Cross are viewed as a human form facing out. The Vertical axis represents your head, heart and feet, and the Horizontal axis represents your left and right arms.

The Year Bearer shown on the right constitutes additional qualities to the make-up of your soul.

The following is a breakdown of this Mayan Cross.
Karijinbba
Feel free to dive deeper into the meaning by rolling over and clicking on each component of the Cross, calculate other Crosses

Interpretation

Overview of Death/Transformer Energy: the great cycle, ancestors, skulls

This energy encompasses the mysteries of life, death and transformation. A profound understanding of other dimensions is deeply felt within their bones. Their clairvoyance and clairsentience leads them to Mayan priesthood and, like the day sign Dawn, is considered an auspicious day to be born because their spiritual path is certain. They are very familiar and comfortable with death and will be protected from violence, illness and accidents.

To realize their true merit, Transformer signs Aries Ram people like you should spend time in sacred places and listen to ancient voices.

The Vertical Axis, Death's Cross is strongly influenced by the direction North, where the color is white and the timbre is intellectual, analytical and cold, like the energy of winter

Heart Sign: The predominant sign of your Mayan Cross
There is an uncanny allure to people born on a Death/Transformer day which is attractive and magical to those in their process of awakening. They experience emotional ups and downs as they play out the karmic debt created in past lives, but they are wise and lucky in love. They need to remember and respect their heritage and will receive their power and direction by doing so.

Conception (head) Sign: Flint
The person born on this day is engendered by Flint which provides a good childhood and protection from any problematic situation or person. As youngsters, Transfirmers may intuit thought processes like intuiting voice like thoughts of their spirit guides.

Destiny (feet) Sign: Jaguar
A fate ruled by Jaguar provides an intense life, both good and bad experiences, but clear recognition as an authority. This energy helps Death become a master of their own land as well as match making. They often carry the gift of lightning blood and become adept healers.

The Horizontal Axis reveals those energies that need to be balanced in order to reach the destiny, influenced by the direction South, where the color is yellow as the Earth brings fulfillment, like the warming energy of summer

Left Arm – Challenges:  Road
The challenge of Road energy is to be clear about the direction in which you may lead others and to know your purpose as you travel. Staying focused with work on service projects and/or spiritual tasks can keep Death people on track. They will travel and be influential leaders.

Right Arm  – Gifts: Sun
This energy keeps Death people from being too heavy. Instead, they are vibrant, attractive and very successful. With Sun, the praise and respect are earned and well-deserved. This energy provides Death all the ingredients for becoming a highly regarded prophet or healer."

All these above in real life I am exactly.

I was born with a "knife Etznab"on one side
spiritual kind of knife that is
it cuts through the pain fire and ice of life's harships as it comes and on the other side my
Death sign Mayan
protects me from death by enemies, its
The sixth day sign of the Mayan zodiac is Death also known as Cimi, Worldbridger or Transformer. Cimi is considered a lucky day to be born because death was a day of transformation, not dying.

The sign of Death symbolized the ancestors and getting guidance from the ancestors was central to Mayan cultural practices

If knowing me is loving me understanding who I am is better
thanks for reading about me
~~~~~~~~~
BY:Karijinbba
grateful for your comments hugs to all stay blessed
Karijinbba Dec 2018
I could say it to his face
all I felt like calling him
good or bad and he smiled
and immediatly I purred.
We even made a wtitten promise
of such enviable love
yet, we didn't put it in practice.

All stressed a Mom deceived battered threatened,
I parrot phrased to him his evil woman's cursing my MOM birthing me, and I lost him
He forgot his old love letter
free speech oath to me.

My ancient king of hearts continued brewing my twenty year old wine in a barrel of heartache and pain leaving me behind amnesic, and death calm.

My Angel ran brewing an older woman's wine
in his bed married to her
wedding band
and in cellar her wine next to mine.
Running from her many a time leaving her with a cold marriage contract handy
while his heart and brain remained ever ONE with mine.

As her personal lubricant got dryer and dryer it was harder for my beloved to be intimate with the ugliest lawliar twoface snake
surgically enhensed
drug user insignificant other called wife.
And as her hatred malice greed and jealousy blew, out of proportion so did her nasty brew on Outer Limits Twilight Zone
along with a breach of his trust
in her,
spoiling her own brewing wine to a nasty bitter moldy vinagar.
Yet to him all her potions remained ever secret
hidden behind smc sunflower smile, daughters and son used
to blindfold her selfish agenda.

Ever so covertly taunting cursing showing hate to me and my children was her banner.
Smc threatened us
by e-mails behind his back.

Blindfolded unoticed all went 
his alcoholic stuppor was foe.

No justice he could brew on either of us yet my wine remained gold fit for kings
but susy viper apropriated it as her own
killing our free will dreams and promises of old.
My wine brewing pure gold
and his other woman smc's covertly brewing hatred where he held her in high regard.
There can't be peace without justice! BEGIN HERE!
if you ask where!
No peace he bestowed upon
his death calm, silenced slandered beloved Karijinbba!
he left behind...Me

Assassination of character is a method lawliars use to
succeed treachery stealing my perfectly aged wine and man

fooling my weary king of hearts
Jpcrdd

I felt so distant and small so,
I let his black hole crooked seol stich anchored to his drunken down free will and bank accounts
JUST HAVE IT ALL!

My dearest beloved deserved that ugly viper for being such a low self esteem coward!
blind blndfolded drunk *****.

And I changed my name to
"Amazing Grace"
~~~~~~~~~~
Angelina San-Gutier..is my birth namefor short
(April, 16 10;30 AM.)
~ my Perupecha tribe, Mex~
and my wings Bba=Ginny
5-19 -legally given by a judge
as a witness protection's new identity (not that I was hiding any deceptions.)
~~~~~
By; Karijinbba
All R. R. a memoir excerpt.
Have you been been so heartbroken by the insensitivity of the one you loved that you rejected who you loved the most in this life??

Have you ever been hurt so deeply that you deprived the object of your devotion of everything they ever loved the most to gain in you and from you?
It happensnto passinate firely lovers
like us..but I never **** to hurt anyone.
I LOVE LIFE!
if I didn't I would be
six feet under earlier.
Karijinbba Apr 2020
Not a poem,;

A Repost:
Stay healthy beloved readers. I send you all my healing love:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Use apple cider vinegar or any vinagar asap even if you feel no tickle add sea salt gargle gargle gargle every hour if possible before and after eating! Or blend garlic and add vinagar gargle it!
men please do it! Go bathroom kitchen sink and look up at the ceilling open mouth wide gargle deep it shall burn a bit spit it out  do it sgain many times until it hurts no more.
Acid gets virus hiding in throat to come out and avoid getting the bicho nano bug into your lungs!?

A healthy immune system begins in the gut with a healthy balance of beneficial bacteria.

For far too many Americans, Candida overgrowth compromises the immune system, as it is constantly fighting the battle to keep Candida in control
If you do become ill, DO NOT feed the virus or the Candida with sugar. Yes, you need to drink a lot of fluids, but don’t drink sodas and sugary juices at this time. Cranberry unsweetened read lable cocktail has sugar get unsweetened one or grandberries fresh into blender or lemonade with stevia is a good choice. Try it warm or cold.

Gargle. Gargle. Gargle. Gargling lowers the viral load, leaving your throat body with fewer invaders to replicate.

So sip on this Mother Earth Organic Root Cider warm. Cold’s and flu often start in the throat or the nasal cavities.
At the first sign of a sore throat or sinus infection, sip on the root cider! If you don’t have it, use apple cider vinegar
Also flush your nose deep each side lean over sink to right and left sides flush nose for God's sakes alternate sea salt baking soda or use vinagar to nose too!? Rubb garlic on your nails eye bows.

Also, remember that a fever is one of nature’s means to fight infection.
Of course, you don’t want it to get too high (higher than 102) and drink plenty of fluids to prevent dehydration.
Filtered apple juice has boron brings down fever fast 4 to 6 onz every hour or if too sweet delute it half water half juice!
Vitamin A, vitamin D, vitamin E, and vitamin C are all vital nutrients for the immune system.
If you have any lip mouth sores you need to ballance minerals too much vitamin requires minerals fulvic humic

If you take high doses of vitamin C to fight a virus, remember that you should not abruptly stop taking vitamin C.
You should titrate down.
Vitamin C is needed by the immune system to make interferon, which the immune system produces to protect healthy cells from viral invasion.!!!

Zinc has been proven to be effective against the common cold and to be effective as a topical treatment for ****** sores.
ZINC It is believed to be effective due to preventing replication of the virus.
The immune system needs selenium to work properly and to build up the white blood cell count.
Berberine is an alkaloid compound found in several different plants, including European barberry, goldenseal, goldthread, Oregon grape, Phellodendron, and Coptis chinensis.

It has antibacterial, anti-inflammatory, antiviral, anti-parasitic, and immune-enhancing properties.
It’s been proven effective against a vast array of bacteria, protozoa, and fungi.
It can be used topically on cuts and other wounds, and it’s perhaps most commonly used to treat gastrointestinal issues.
Probiotics are always helpful in maintaining gut health, especially when the body is under a viral attack that involves the digestive system.
Probiotic foods and drinks without added sugar can help maintain a healthy balance of bacteria.

Garlic is anti-viral, anti-fungal, and antibacterial.
You can take garlic in a tonic or if you can handle it, chew raw garlic.
It not only will help fight the virus, it will help **** any secondary infections trying to take root.

Echinacea not only supports the immune system, it also has been proven to reduce the severity and duration of viral infections.

Colloidal silver is believed to interfere with the enzymes that allow viruses (bacteria and fungi as well) to utilize oxygen
A double-blind trail showed elderberry extract’s ability to reduce symptoms of influenza and speed recovery.

It also showed elderberry’s ability to enhance immune response with higher levels of antibodies in the blood.
It is believed to inhibit a virus’s ability to penetrate healthy cells and protect cells with powerful antioxidant S. Elderberry has also been shown to inhibit replication in four strains of ****** viruses and reduce infectivity of *** strains.

The flavonoids in green tea are believed to fight viral infections by preventing the virus from entering host cells and by inhibiting replication.

Though double-blind clinical trials are needed, olive leaf extract has been shown to inhibit replication of viruses. In one study, 115 of 119 patients had a full and rapid recovery from respiratory tract infections while 120 of 172 had a full and rapid recovery from viral skin infections such as ******.

Pau d’arco has been used in indigenous medicine for generations. One of its compounds, lapachol, has proven effective against various viruses, including influenza, ****** simplex types I and II and poliovirus. It is believed to inhibit replication.

Studies have shown that glycyrrhizin, a compound found in licorice root was more effective in fighting samples of coronavirus from SARS patients than four antiviral drugs. It reduces viral replication, cell absorption, and the virus’s ability to penetrate cells. It is also being used to treat ***.

St. John’s Wort has been proven effective against influenza, ****** simplex, and ***.

If you’re prone to viral infections or are dealing with a chronic infection like ***, as mentioned above, the first step is to get your gut in shape. This is absolutely imperative. The best article to do that with is Best Supplements To **** Candida and Everything Else You Ever Wanted To Know About Fungal Infections & Gut Health. Everyone who is chronically ill has an abundance of Candida. Yes, everyone.

Provided your gut is healthy, or if you just feel the need to skip that part, here are the supplements to take in order to make sure your immune system is able to fight off viruses:

While there are most supplements listed above, the combination of these listed here is more than enough to balance out the body and ward off viral infection.
~~~~~~~
A Repost By Karijinbba.
love kindnes helping one another
call neighbors help or ask for help...ask.
Karijinbba Oct 2018
To increase good fortune
like a tree of life.
A
AB
ABR
ABRA
ABRAC
ABRACA
 ABRACAD
 ABRACADA
  ABRACADAB
   ABRACADABR
     ABRACADABRA.
I changed!
got Wiser!
I didn't share my Knight
his destiny cursed Mom
birthing me! unprovoqued
playing us both
lover against lover
by chicanery deceit duplicity
backfiring deadly on me!
for his destiny to appear
wholly good being
more evil then good.
~~~SO NOW~
I create as I speak!
I won't disappear like the word
I was wholly good long ago
now I am more good than evil
ballanced rising beauty
Take heed though!
this really happened to me
not remembering this magic prescripted incantation
nor understanding it
a temporary memory loss
due to brain blood loss
Oh! many years ago
missing the mark
this timeless riddle
My loss was imeasurable!
I lost my true love.
Understanding it would have boomeranged me
joy happily ever after
Great fortune fame
True love priceless
along with saying
just TEN to fifty two
magic words
bellow:
I AM SORRY
I never meant to hurt you.
me fierce unborn protector
twas wrong medical advice
I love you, I will marry you
I will sing for you
No birthing task will ever be too hard for me to show love
love of my life
I surrender to you
do with me as you please
if your LOVE is my prise!
~~~~~
I demeanish misfortune
ABRACADABRA
in reverse below.
~~
why fail to question
my exasperated response to
ur e-mail why not ask about
original offender e-mailer!
the poisoner coiled
to your bed waiting
was your breach of trust!
irate culprit setting up discord
your destiny wrote saying
"I was unhappy because I didn't like the WAY my mother's p...y looked when I was born!"
all out of jealousy!
malice greed evile way of
deceiving a man to see
an ugly deceiver
in more favourable light
it hurts doesnt it?
I returned fireball to smc
thinking viper still on to me
but it was you who got it!
uran back to wine-reward!
original offender dragging
you into her collapsing
black hole where
not even urlight escapes
your capricorn's revenge!
victims aren't fools!
foe is now exposed
youmemeuwins
ABRACADABRA
ABRACADABR
ABRACADAB
ABRACADA
ABRACA
ABRACA
ABRAC
AB­RA
ABR
AB
A.
~~~~~
By;Karijinbba
~All copy rights reserved~
~pc=rc=jpt-asg=aa=bba~
Abracadabra;
Take thee all thy wealth and treasures buried loot precious love
I wish for no other wealth from thee then to be thine wife from my virginity to have only thee one man one husband for the father of many of our children and to never know NO other man in this life or in many more, my Lancelott My King of Prussia PA Mont Davis,
Macchu-Picchu my highest
mountain climber lover
Hymalayan thee!
Abracadabra!
Its my wishing well coin wish for today since 44 Springs back.
Karijinbba Oct 2018
"Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play."
sang Paul McCartney in his song
and my first lover to me a long long time ago in the Atlantic mystery by the golf of Mexico.
I believe it's better that,
"when we love someone,
we do so un conditionally- without any expectations no riddles or fill in the blank games or cold computer screen mirror- button- pushing disaster!
Like my wealthy elite did to me just to show me how troubled he really was. Even though hurting to test a woman's heart is acceptable if worthy material.compensation exists.
Nothing really beats the face to face dialogue
embracing his lady with a hug and a passionate smiling kiss
an adorable " I love you"
from a true love lover
who was Lost and~~~~?
~~~~~~

Lost~~~~~~~~
passion~~~~~
change~~~~~
earth~~~~~­~
(Fill in the blanks  please.)
~~~~~~
Revised:03/30/19
By: Karijinbba.
(Asg/Bba)
WHO WHEN WHERE HOW WHY!
"fill in the blanks."
Karijinbba Nov 2018
My old true love rdd=PC
wrote this poem to me on HP.
~~~~~
"I fall in love."
"Death would be liberating
but I wouldn't suggest jumping off a cliff"
                                               NO
"And for the life of me I hold on
to shaddy realities,
and an odd feeling of never being enough."

"I don't know what will happen"

IT IS ALL OUT OF MY HANDS

IT'S ALL OUT OF TIME"
~~~~
( my spontaniety of first thought)
my response 2018 is:

I fall in love too I choose life.
dearest true love of yore
from your holy hands
your love unto my heart falls
joining my spirit soul
precious twin flame
and here with me  love won't die

nor can unconditional love
into my hands ever perish

true love needs not be liberated
as no TREASON ever existed
you just got me ALL WRONG!

And since when orphanes
in protective custody hiding for their life after Feds and murderers buchered her family and loved ones in childhood

and throughout adolecence years  a faulty weak covert adoption witness protection program forcing victim to live as an exiled fugitive??
due to a horrendous loss of life

You simply didn't know me
for the task you and your brother assigned to me dearest ones
and isn't it treason on your part to abandon an amnesic loved one
only because it wasn't written in an old script?
some lovers being in love
feeling betrayed and hurting
do jump off a cliff
like you did It hurts do much to understand your pain physical and mental too
Still others jump into amnesic shocks becoming like I did
DEATH CALM! its very painful
i had no shell shick therapyst no councellings just hell left behind
I don't recomment either one
ways to hurt for living one another presence was needed!

both ways of hsndling pain
are equally distructive unfruitful look at me now!
you have support family bank
structure how do I win from here  I healed living in denial.
my ignorsnt ways ended in heartbreaking tragedy more for me than for you
You were my hero my knight
I loved you always will i was in love with you I hurt too
We were so identical twin flames from the inside thinking modes
both feeling so small
and never enough for each other!
because we were apart!
And both so brightly colored in the outside with Gs light
very rare occurance
a triumph for the finding
worth the fame intended
worth the pain of defeat endured
for the best can only be bought at the cost of great pain and sacrifice!!
my pain went to sleep in an amnesic transformative shock
I have always loved you
and as you see I did jump!
Right into 'death' and 'knife'
i transformed to survive
Read my birth chart both Death and Knife remain a blessing and a curse to me such mystery
but both protecting me just the same!
two protective mechanisms
per the Mayan calendar.
such a mystery we both are.
Death saving me from 'death'
and knife'cutting' through my pain a cold ice blade
there transforming me
Death Calm and silent!
I am not insensitive I feel love
death needs not be liberating
my soul knowing true love
will rest in peace with some regrets
I promised our unborn childten that no love fame nor great fortune would be greater then the love I feel for them all
and I kept my painful promise
but it was the end of me
In your eyes
I must have shrank smallest yet
misunderstood I go unless you read me here on HP the final fronteer unless you read
my memoir but we are both running out of time
lovers die in more ways than jumping off cliffs

precious love thank you for loving me
it hurt me very deeply to let you go so long ago
I am the woman who loves you the most in this whole wide world
I could have given my life for just one day though to have understood you grabbed you!
to have known what to do
what not to do,
where to go, where not to go,
what to say, what not to say.
what to think and what not to think!
i didn't understand you!
so I feared you
I couldn't fight every greedy jealous woman for your love as the left behind gap how?
forgive me please beloved
I felt too small and worthless

I had no idea anyone on earth would love me too back!
much less enough as to jump of a cliff to hurt that much for my life to benefit as new Eve
even changing earth with you
a worlds new adam Back then

I sincerely did not understand what you had planed to do after my impatient ignorant fall

Life had only taught me
to feel insignificantly tini especially when being taunted
mistreated and challenged
abandonement syndrome
was my demise dince childhood
your mind games and head riddles smothered my dreams
of you me for us.

loving you more than
I loved myself was understood
very well that's what life
had taught me to do
to let go of everything I ever loved the most
when all life did was take chunks of my family and my life.
You were life's reward to me
without you by my side
I became speechless Dead Calm
stump like on Mothers day.

'sorry' can't depict the black hole
that has swallowed you
and me apart
nor pain depict the bottomless pit that living without you is

I too fell into my death
heartbroken as you announced
a JaneHilton freeway driving
in oposite directions was agony when in your letter
you wrote you had a wife!

I fell into the abyss and I died
I was only nineteen then

Then came hell getting me stranded at the fork road
all the way to hell Greece

smily kind penpal demons helped me up a plane ticket

two in all even married me not to avert authorities of my impending death with their treacherous agendas
IT WAS ALL STAGED
as was much of my life on earth.

I am glad we met
glad we loved each other
near or far
in G
s hands we both are.
~~~
By:Karijinbba-Copy Rights
2017 revised 03/ 29/2020.
excerpt from my Memoar written throughout my life.
Unto Him I am glued
my King of Prussia.
oxytocin- dopamine dilated
his pupils inside his blue green
as I entered Him, eons ago,
and never came out
He left but returned to my abode
for me or his Tequila.
I wanted to fall down crying beg him to take me with him to his heaven
Saving me from the hellish existence
But pain was greater then tears to convince HIM.
~~
Into his song YESTERDAY I merged 
and with one voice we often sing it
from that time on and on.
I became his song his moon and stars.
Although our fame sleeps
as beauty rested in a glass coffin;
with one leap across the gap
chaos that one butcher
with medical ignorant lies
opened up and three
 of us got evaporated.

With one song each in heart
we bridged that chasm.
In his art we thrive yet for long.

To Him to his heart of gold
I slowly walk to, his ancient bride.
Into our holy temple of forever,
straight to his heart and open arms
United in one single thought.
Our own Taj Majal
to reign we did plan to build.

Into mine eye pupils, grasping
all of his substance in
his light projecting all was received
My intergalactic time traveler.
Interchangeable we are.

In me he finds more than wisdom
he finds truth a true artist.
Our true love bittersweet.

Before Him I Joyfully crumble kneeling
As he embraces my swollen
teary eyes and merging me
Into to his heart and arms
I surrender grace, charm
and complete trust.
There!
In confining solitude
In the darkest of mine nights
My brightest sunny days
it's him I hear, love and seek.
I understand, worship
and adore him forever more
He's my true love! Luna tell Him!
That I love him the most.
~~~~~~
Mr. And Mrs Andrew
And Karijinbba.
All rights reserved
https://youtu.be/6JlGL88HG8c
Karijinbba Aug 2018
Nor dread nor hope attend
A dying animal;
A man awaits his end
Dreading and hoping all;
Many times he died,
Many times rose again.
A great man in his pride
Confronting murderous men
Casts derision upon
Supersession of breath;
He knows death to the bone
Man has created death.

- W.B.Yeats
For:Karijinbba
Me just a child confronted
murderous men at only age five
nearly killing me men in uniform Greedy Feds killed my father and every man child in my Purhepetcha Indigenous tribe for the greed
of my father's land I hid iñ the chicken coop and lived
Man created death repayng evil for my good from the riches of my land they ate and lived as kings
while I barely survived, I did rise I grew up and I also was Loved and kissed.. Again betrayed injured I was and dying I still rose and still I rose and still I rise again and again¡
I guess I am supernatural. Something always tried to **** me and something else rises me and kept me stumped but living. I love life babies children the wise eye of the aged. I love the Knight spirit breath of life  side in men, .music, poetry song with these I thrive I rise and rise..
my friends Poets and poetessess thank you for RISING up to read.
Karijinbba Oct 2018
I Rose Again and Again

Nor dread nor hope attend
A dying animal;
A man awaits his end
Dreading and hoping all;
Many times he died,
Many times rose again.
A great man in his pride
Confronting murderous men
Casts derision upon
Supersession of breath;
He knows death to the bone
Man has created death.

By: W.B.Yeats, for Karijinbba
~~
The malice of thiefs injured me nearly killing me st only age five;
Men (beasts) in uniform Greedy Feds killed my father five brothers and all grown man and boy in my Purhepetcha Indigenous tribe for the greed of my father's land
Man created death repaing evil for my good from the riches of my forest land they ate and lived as kings while I barely survived, but take heed I did rise.

On my father's shoulders my seahorse kind of dad beloved
he carried and adored me
my future he could read perfectly in our starry night sky and love for me happened exactly as dad had predicted it would be
from my fathers heart I thrived and I rose
and men I did love despite treason by few
~~~~~
By:Karijinbba/AA.
THREE HEROS LOVED ME MY FATHER MY OLD TRUE LOVE AN AMERICAN AN ELITE WISE KING OF HEARTS AND MY ADOPTIVE MOM ROSE WHO LOST HER LIFE TRYING TO PROTECT ME
BECAUSE OF THEIR COURAGE AND FORESIGHT TO BET ON MY FUTURE
I RISE EVER LOVING AND WISE
Karijinbba Aug 2018
Speak
When you speak I see cascades of life.
Life and light tend to look the same.
Your light is turquoise and the color of jade sitting just beneath the surface of choppy water.
When you speak I feel heat.
You have yet to burn me.
You are the steady warmth of new born embers of a fire
yet to blaze. When you speak I smell salt water.
Even with a sting, you’re the most refreshing thing.
The ocean is not as paradoxical as your passionately
calm surface. When you speak I taste loneliness.
Bitter sweet like underripe tangerines.
I cannot know this beautiful mind of yours without encountering  cold, rusty, metal walls
When you speak I hear midnight.
You know how to play the silences.
I hold my breath waiting for the next sentence you’re carefully, mysteriously orchestrating. Whisper or shout
speak to me againHole in my heart
Speak Karijinbba Beloved!
Never had a problem speaking was friendly yet cautious--bit shy when meeting people who seemed to have me under a microscope as an adult yet still enjoyed listening to them speak my true love was my best teacher in the above but he never hung around long enough to break the ice nor he just poped the question I was to beg cry sing for him ask him to marry me but I was a hybrid  ET Cindi couldn't order the mice to help me out much less ask a king to be mine
i observed body language what they say and not say i deciphered the in betweens the thing NOT revealed All gets recorded in our memory bank. As a child I was silenced in a nunnery five years not allowed to speak but only with Yes or No by an evil nun as a hate crime.a form of turture
The subconscious sees hears feels tastes eats drinks it all-it's our photografic memory recorder for everything good and. bad!
We get to experience, right?
the tangible and intangible things we are that thing which God created in his image I did learn to Speak read even other languages in time i overcame that grip of evil, uderdtanding the beauty and ugliness in SIlence!. By the way Karijin my poetic nick name is a lovely hole in Australia it looks like a woomb giving birth to blue waters a honeymoon trip I missed along with my beloved groom Pc/rk.
~All tights received.~
Karijinbba Jul 2021
Personal REPOST - Not a poem.
~~~~~~~~~
My guardian Archangel is Ariel
known as the Goddess of nature
like I am
Ariel Archangel heals
the planet animals responsible for natural elements
Earth, wind, water, and fire.
Ariel's role as an archangel
relates to inspiration.
Aries people treat breaking up like a sport, and they do not want to lose. Aries would rather dump than be dumped, and so if tension has been building, they're likely to be the ones to initiate the split.

Since Arians want to move on faster than their exes, they're often the first to rebound, but they're rarely malicious and will self defend
as last resort!
Aries-born people are favorited
for theirfierce and independent approach to life being attracted
to their uninhibitedness
and a wild personality.
Aries-born people are attracted to the quirkiness and weirdness of
Aquarians and both get along like a house on fire!
Unlike any other zodiac sign,
Aries is more hung up on the memories they created with the ex-partners than their exes themselves
they avoid competition
For Arians, it's not at all about getting back together, but it is all about the nostalgia that ~hits them hard.~
Aries cannot stand people who try to set the tone in their life!
Aries hate ~intrusiveness.~
Do not push Aries or give them ultimatums-they alone will decide when to call and see you!
Aries are quite confident
energetic and a bit of a daredevil
it's no surprise that their biggest fear is the fear of going unnoticed
or being forgotten.
Aries poeople, Arians, want to make a mark on the world, and they like to have many accomplishments
achievements under their belt.
~~~~~
When an Aries is hurt, they will let you know with their blunt and impulsive actions.
Aries' element is fire making them naturally very passionate,
inclined towards exploration,
and a little bit scary
~when set off.~
Don't tell an Aries a greater lover roams your head
spinning your inner thighs
Your Aries will become
a puff of smoke
and be GONE

Aries born women are
fire and ice cold and hot
symultaneously
in your arms
If you are ever kissed
by an Aries
you are truly loved
cherished and adored
but only if,
if, you reciprocate fully
~~~~~~~~~
Defined by: Karijinbba
Don't betray Arians

they got powers to END you
or to bless you near or far.
if you attempted against them
everything evil is
returned to you hundred fold

you are already dead
no forgiveness granted
if you do not ask
you'll have to make amends.
if an Aries loved you
you are in luck.
Karijinbba Jul 2021
~ lover poet friend~
~~~~
Do with us as you please
CONSPIRING UNIVERSE
~RD for angel K~
You aligned us but we the lovers turn the keys to accept or decline even our frantic tantric joy where we rhyme.

For too long I shot my doors fearing flinching distance will have the last laugh.
~~~~
then came my love RD
and I can touch Raj places
no one can and he
Mine that much more.

  I am over being out of time  
Not taking more blows
I exude security confidence power value my yes and nos are good I am myself

If you must to her go who
waits for her younger half
green needing wear, Go.
And you keep your love and Angel K me on hold;?
I rather keep your sword
And Z dagger in hearts orb.
~~~
The cosmos needs nothing
Why should I? I showed you how my journey can prosper us both and our family!

not you and ur other Z.
~~~~
We mirrored each other searching for long lost lovers yet all you see is distance.
And your Z.
There are so many songs to play many lovely little things to live for yours and mine.

Remember make up your mind for our gates to open up your tiny window z must close-respect my freedom of speech.
My love and feelings matter
Yours matter more to me.

We are at crossroads
I've been here before
~~~~
Dignity whispers
I am disciplined in the art of love and boundaries.
I ain't door mat for lovers rainny days.
~~
By Karijinbba.
https://youtu.be/qtRw72ia4rk
Karijinbba Jun 2020
JEALOUS

Poem lyrics dedicated to Karkjinbba
in memory of pjc-rkrdd interstellar
Traveler on another mission.
~~~~~~
'm jealous of the rain
That falls upon your skin
It's closer than my hands have been
I'm jealous of the rain
worshipping in ground as you may walk on splattering all down

I'm Jealous of the waves at sea that rock your boat with her not me
spilling out on you our old wine reserved for us to spill on each others unintended wounds

I'm jealous of the wind
That ripples through
your clothes;
the exotic perfume aromas
you bought for me alone
but now she wears.
along with my diamond heart ring.

I'm Jealous of the way she combes her hair each night
looking in our ancient
mirrored vanity desk

While you looking at her
moon light to guide
may you look at me
my stary constellation
sky high glide  

I am jealous of the tennis rocket
you swing to her meant
to swing back to me
Darling;
it's closer than your shadow
left behind to comfort me.

Oh, I'm jealous of the air you breathe in the same room, with her alone  dancing to songs
and tunes meant for us two alone
on your master lovely bedroom;
moving dancing rdd/bba style!

Still I wish you the best
all this world could give
Love of my life.

I wouldn't sacrifice my love and life for you again though;
instead, I would, earn your love,
right back forgive me sweet love divine elite great among great,
peace be with you

As I told you when you left
In every lifetime for another girl,
you leave me
all I wanted was an airline ticket
to fly to you in Carol Lumbard's skin

Dear runner mine
poverty was my foe I couldn't chase.
but I always thought you'd come back,
or even pick me up
on your limousine
for a joyful ecstacy filled ride!

Telling me all you found without me was heartbreak and misery!
Because darling that's all I found
without you.
It's hard for me to say,
I'm jealous of the way
You're h a p p y without meeee.

I'm jealous of the nights
That I don't spend with you
watching the billion stars from our bedroom bed with your patpapa
Aquarius and my Aries telescope.
I'm wondering
who you lay next to!
Oh, I'm jealous of those sacred nights.
I'm jealous of the love
your love that was all mine
gone for someone else to share.

I'm jealous of the love
cause I wished you too
the very best
all this world could give.
~~~~~~~
For Karijinbba
By: Kear and Natalie Hemby.
06-11-2020
Copy Rights.
I have nothing to do with jealou malice or greed..as
Jealousy is a very distractive emotion
And if I had to be jealous of another woman
Something was really wrong with our relationship.
I was hurt still i wish you well instead but not jealous I let you go
your happiness was above and beyond my own for I loved you the.most in the whole wide world for I forgave you the most
Peace.
Karijinbba Jul 2021
(rddjpc-Asgbba)
~~~~
Some people miss their mark
they find His and Her God and Goddess looking straight in their eye writing sharing giving sighing,
smiling in their face, thus
awakened by true love divine
gift of the Universal heaven;
and yet, remain oblivious
to the treasure found without looking.
Both fail to relish cherish with sweet abandon the new love found
continuing praying to their imagined other God's for true love to arrive.

Unbelievably one or both
go back to dreamming and sleeping
living in a world of unreality.
Their dream never breathes nor lives in search of the love that swiftly
had already passed them by.

Ignoring their bird of love it
flew away, searching for faithful
embracing lovers.
Surely the gods and goddess grant blessings to those who embrace love
in the eye of the beloved.
The just Gods simply
grant them wisdom grace.
A goddess a God in our embrace
is better then any other
out there in the cosmic
vaccum space time continuum
of cruel Mr time! Sigh.
~~~~~~~~~
By Karijinbba
07/2021
Live in present time honor your dieties but do not fail to ignore honor cherish the love true found or forever regret
the gifts the Gods sent you and you never grasped.
Karijinbba Jun 2019
Just like Goddess Kali
I am feared when not
understood
my enemies know my loving passion are my kids
those demons slander me
fearing the mother
goddess in me
I gave life and inadvertedly heartbroken waived it
I give life
birthed my children
against all adds
motherhood apeaces me
injustice enrages my dance
I am Goddess Kali Karijin
~~
Precious daughters
Elena Rose Jeanette fear not
I save I protect I write
it's my frenzied dance
surounded by demons ferocious
you and me won many a
gruesome wars
to protect you three your
children alike my light
I have deamed
Remember Mother Kali
I love you miss you
more and more
and for you my life I lay
~~~.
The goddess mother
(excerpt)
~estranged from kids ~
~~~~~~
"The stars are blotted out,
    The clouds are covering clouds,
It is darkness vibrant, sonant.
    In the roaring, whirling wind
Are the souls of a million lunatics
    Just loose from the prison-house,
Wrenching trees by the roots,
    Sweeping all from the path...
The sea has joined the fray,
    And swirls up mountain-waves,
To reach the pitchy sky.
    The flash of lurid light
Reveals on every side
    A thousand,
thousand shades
Of Death begrimed and black."

love & motherhood apeace me.
~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
inspired
by Hindi ink Durga-Kali
Shiva Lord's Wife
revised 06-5-19
~~~~
the poem shows how the whole universe is a stage for the goddess's terrible and frenzied protector dance.
only motherhood
apeaces the mother in me
estranged motherhood ends me.
thats why childless foe slander me
~~
my grown children imagine
their enemy's darkness in me.
~~
Durga is Kali Lord Shivas wife
represent good & bad apeaced
by being Loved cherished
and motherhood instict
RH O negative Mothers like me
may abort on medical evil advice
if no Rhogam vaccine is
affordable by Mother to be.
not that we ****** child to be.
Karijinbba May 2021
I have fought sprouting
the common ardurous way
known by most Earthlings,
through mean suffering pain
that life is filled with.

I sought to sprout of pure joy
immense happiness only,
true love found grasped.
faintly,
that joyful way of sprouting
great wisdom
like a lovely butterfly
from rose bush traveling
to rose buds
flew by me
eluding my white
gardenia rose garden.
Or stealing what it could.
My wisdom now bleeds.
and many avoid me
like a bad owmen.

They wear blindfolds
drink heavily and do other
cruel things to themselves
seeking paradise blindly.
The wisdom of profound joy
that never arrives to stay.
Some asleep walk in their pain.

I won't ask you to walk with me
we all crawl, walk, run, or fly
following our own dreams
roads not taken weeping.

I wait for one traveler only
who would share any ride
To happier easier greener
serenity pastures.
Perhaps together learning
Not to bleed for wisdom,
  and working out troubles
as they come along
One day at a time.
~~~~~~~~
By Karijinbba
All Rights reserved
2021
Learning comes unplanned
embrace it and discard
Leaving all for tomorrow
Mostly tomorrow arrives but wears masks

I am a tired but willing traveler
Karijinbba Nov 2021
You in your wait,
me and in mine,
we've brought to a halt
our whole LIFE for awhile
your garden sprouted new seeds
I don't want to live nor die
without you
You've gone willow on me
I blame only me
Hear my plee and re-appear
bless me ágain babe
Pick me up from this dessert land
where only evil passes by to steal
my last portion of bread.
my last earned dime.
I am homeless near your
gold mine and frozen wind
turbines
in your power bless me.
Please fortune maker
build me an abode.
  Save me from this homeless
exiled purgatory.
I've paid for my mistakes
I am only human spare me.
~~~~~~~~~~
Karijinbba
https://youtu.be/7dtjpC6Oyrw

need your help need you be my friend. 1678-517-5066
loving you only you eternally bless me only you can stop my slippery slide you got power to stop it help me please
Karijinbba Aug 2021
Love me like you do.
Like a needle in a haystack
is true love me and you.
Trustworthy friend also you.
An hp's haystack found, miracle.
A loving soul, treasure icecle.
In the law of attraction, true love
attracts like, and in a notch of good fortune opposites must intimately attract true lovez entanglement
Is an intricate weave,
of LOVEz for two in one loop.
I found a twin matching soul.
A magnet in both our midst,
receptiveness open mind exist.
Intellectual genius in heart.
its gist, portal and bridge.
Uncovering vast blessings
his needle in my haystack,
just came to me, as bee
to pollen in essence,
his needle found me.
Now retaining such find and
price takes sculpture in mind.
Keeping it requires an equal
enterprise a twin needle's vise
Or my fire and ice!
In love and war it's wise,
To tingle our rhyme with rice.
To never part, it takes more pie
than luck, poem, or needle in eye.
I once was blind, but now I see
Through our fire in ice.

~~~~
BY: Karijinbba.
All Rights Reserved - revised
08+2021.
https://youtu.be/mHONNcZbwDY
Oh swaying willow tree
lower your branches cover me.
I am so cold without thee.
You're so green and gentle..
give me oxigen and shade,
you bow down gently
as in reverence yet detached
I feel more than gratitude
I too am detached as breeze!
In wonderment of your face
feel my breeze under
your starry sky

You like a hungry kitten
sensing timing to run for it
may it be that my pyramid's
wise winds shake your trunk,
to leaveless ****
blushing in your branches?
Are your hidden
fruits any ripe
you do sway delightfully
My frozen cocoone is detached
my tiny feet from my butterfly
might slightly tickle your fancy
as I voraciously neeble on
your green golden leaves?
will you fear my strong breeze
wild Autumn winds
as your branch may get
detached.?
~~~~~.
By;Mr and Mrs Andrews.
With Karijinbba.
https://youtu.be/w82NHDRRGJ0
Poet ancient dear
Stay with me ink lover
I take the heart not just a hat"
The sweetness you given me,
poems ink more mystery
takes my breath away
stay with me.
Timeless hour glass.
Where you hold me tight 
In your arms deep in the night  
you enchant me with your charms
all of the night I hear your heart
beating against my own
you paint my gloomy sky with
each one of your sighs
wrapped around me
many lifetimes can't suffice
I crave to see the me in you
silver E.T mine melt my gold
I live under your willow's
dream spell, stay with me.
~~~
Mr and Mrs Andrews
@ Karijinbba
https://youtu.be/sq-7sFxxlns
Once a year its champagne!
I feel calm passionate and teary.
It gets my head to Paris
  As life is broken down goes out
in transition or revelation,
there's a greàter darkness then the one we inadvertently fight,
the darkness of the soul
that has lost its way.
I was chosen by great sages crossing paths the sting of my blindfold lingers noone sees hope or their future, or where it leads we know only that it's bought in pain and sacrifice.
Letting go what I loved the most.
was eternal loss, having
no reparation, neither in time,
nor in eternity.
My love river is truth it's mouth is
cosmic creation.
He measured sensuality
secretively, and in shadows 
he showed me feathers of half
a man syllhuette of him,
and feels guilty I just fill in blanks,
why smack a devolving face?
And what the heck!
I first measure people in trust.
then love, as true love is rare.
Trust tells love where to roam.
Love can't be made perfect
in distrust nor fear of rivals.
When I give my heart I do,
When I share my dreams too.
I do not drown in midnight
   dew not retreat;
but I won't take sand in my eyes.
After the loving I go from rags
to riches in his love or shine
to wiser horizons..
~~~~~~~~~
Mr and Mrs Andrews.
At Karijinbba
https://youtu.be/NRt6YZV0Fz0
Karijinbba Jul 2022
✓\
JC
✓\Baby✓\
✓\baby baby✓\
✓\✓\✓\✓\✓\✓\
✓\babe babe babe✓\
✓\✓\✓\babybabybaby✓\✓\✓\
I do I❤️u
I miss you
✓\b✓\
✓\a✓\
✓\b✓\
✓\y✓\
✓\baby baby baby✓\✓\
✓\✓\✓\✓\✓\✓\✓\✓✓\✓\✓\
By: Karijinbba
@JPC-rdd.rd.
https://youtu.be/BwqH7l9xSgo

✓\MUST USE HEADPHONES✓\
✓\✓\
It's been 4 decades since I could say the word baby it now is bittersweet.
since I lost you both my child and PC dad
Karijinbba Oct 2020
Respectability boredom
The basis of your
very happy marriage.
Added to it my painful
everlasting suffering.
My heart-ache,
and heart-break.
It all came to it's
inevitable end.

Everyone as everything
comes to a holt the"end."
I roled your deceitful dice back!
You now rip back
what greedy ones have planted
in your ***** garden's door
and my suffering.

This universal law applies
as a balancing Libra scale!
It just never fails for anyone
It's all an ever
pendulum Oscillation.
~~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
Copy Rights apply.
10-2020.
Yenson Sep 2018
Oh I wonder if I mean pounding
Or maybe it's pondering
Hell what do I know, spelling isn't my strong point
I've always been envious of all those brainy lot
To see me you'll know why I can never be an alfa male
So its better I hide behind a keyboard and troll
I can't help feeling inadequate when I read the good poems
All I do is steal words and ideas then twist them around
I pownd and pownd and pownd till I drive them away
I am a  Pownder that pownd and get a pound for every pownding

I am a little person with a little mind and something else bothers me so much it leaves me with a Napoleonic complex
But I hope other men don't know about it but anytime I see a hot dog, wish I could just disappear and die cause I know that's one pownding That leaves me unpownded.

Excuse me I got a job to do
There's a poet here, I've got to drive him away from here
He's Benson or something like that and I just feel so small
Can never write like him and being a stinking bully and a Hater
I feel so inadequate and it's stressing me out, how good he is
He leaves me feeling so carri gibbanoius and useless pownding about
My job and aim is to oppose anything positive and good
I was born to destroy cause I can't do better
guess that's why I can't even spell an ordinary word like
POUNDING....
That benson fellow will soon leave and coward inadequate me
will rule with my mediocre drivel again or go copy from someone
and pretend its my work like I did at Junior High and college.

My good friend below wrote this to me:

Karijinbba › In His Grace..............

I hear the pownding waves of God in every day or written silences. I hear Gods loving waves in everyday's life's harships and struggles; even when God in his silence blessess, me in imagined lovers arms, and in dreams, when my breath away.....is taken.

He copied a poem written by me and improved on it and then
posted it back to me to show me how to improve on my work.
So I must learn from him and be a better writer
And stop feeling bad and envious about other people's poems
And writing privately to them to intimidate them and making
them quitting this site.
My thanks to Kainjinbba who helped sharing his collaboration on this poem and has done a lot to make me feel welcomed and appreciated on HP. Please note that Passive Aggression is not something that Karijinbba indulges in, neither is karijinbba a bully or a troll who tries to antagonise talent and endeavour ...
RhettlvScarlett Oct 2018
A repost:
A Roman poem written before The birth of Christ, inspired the title Gone With The wind
with Scarlett and Rhett Butler

But here you see only old
confessions of a man's true love for his beloved who is all gone
-Or-
(Or a woman's true love for
her beloved runner wishing she could have chased.)
~~~
CYNAR*A.
~~~~~
Last night yesternight, betwixt her lips and mine
There fell thy shadow, Cynara! Thy breath was shed
Upon my soul between the kisses and the wine;
And I was desolate and sick of an old passion,
  Yea, I was desolate and bowed my head:
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.

All night upon mine heart I felt her warm heart beat,
Night-long within mine arms in love and sleep she lay;
Surely the kisses of her bought red mouth were sweet;
But I was desolate and sick of an old passion,
  When I awoke and found the dawn was grey:
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.
I have forgot much, Cynara! Gone with the wind,
Flung roses, roses riotously with the throng,
Dancing, to put thy pale, lost lilies out of mind
But I was desolate and sick of an old passion,
  Yea, all the time, because the dance was long:
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.

I cried for madder music and for stronger wine,
But when the feast is finished and the lamps expire,
Then falls thy shadow, Cynara! The night is thine;
And I am desolate and sick of an old passion,
  Yea, hungry for the lips of my desire:
I have been faithful to thee, Cynara! in my fashion.
~~~~~~~

By:Ernest Dowson
For:RhettlvScarlet.
to honor Karijinbba
in her great loss and healing
of her memory chip.
~~~~~~
Copy Rights.
~~~~
Ernest Dowson (1867-1900) died of alcoholism at the age of 32. His downward spiral began at age 23 when he fell for an 11 year old girl who would spurn him at 14 when he proposed marriage.
The following year, in 1894 his father died from an overdose. Dowson's mother
hanged herself within a year of her husband's death.

Soon after this dual tragedy Dowson left for France before returning back to England in 1897. Curiously he lived with the family of his unrequited love. Penniless, heartbroken and filling the empty voids in his life with alcohol, Dowson would spend the last six weeks of his life in the cottage of the Oscar Wilde biographer Robert Sherard who had found him
drunk in a bar.

Speaking of Oscar Wilde, he wrote after Dowson's death of a,"Poor wounded wonderful fellow that he was, a tragic reproduction of all tragic poetry, like a symbol, or a scene.

I hope bay leaves will be laid on his tomb and rue and myrtle too for he knew what true love
unrequieted love was."
~~~~~
Rhett Buttler might have married other women but he never stopped loving Scarlett his true twin soul.
IN EVERY LIFETIME!
I am ice cube
fire put out
no other love rules
in your sbsence
In love our hearts are.
trust energy the courage
eyes like air to breathe,
poem the food devoured,
To nurture stain or drain,
our ancient lovers aim.
Patience key passion luck
Lock is temperate heaven
And you my vine all mine  
To relish, cherish to trust
  my groom my Adam
your bride your Eve.
Tree of life
willow divine.
~~~~~~
Mr and Mrs Andrews
And Karijinbba.
https://youtu.be/UMGn__JFBO8
Karijinbba Aug 2018
My compass points to you
You are My True North
Love of my life
King of Prussia PA
Your photo and your Rose touching my lips is daily joy
keeping me company
  a tiny mirror here besides my bed my love giver of life
When I feel lost, I look into it
To know where I am
and who I am
My old True lover of life
you are my orienting point
my fixed point in a spinning world that helps me stay on track as an Aries leader woman.
It is derived from my most deeply held beliefs values and the principles I lead by.
It is my internal compass, unique to me,
representing who I am at my deepest level.
It's the best I can do while you are here with me in spirit
because I lost you in person
so you can't be here in person
To care for me you wrote
dearly beloved rddjpc
I love you so near and far
~~~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
All rights reserved
Revised 10-28-19
I myself a woman always have an internal compass pointing always north to some Camelot place over the rainbow where dreams that I dears to dream did come true
I failed to bind when the wounds that bleeded my womans heart were too fresh to grab his love at once
a passer by a king a photom of light streaming through space
thats what most all good things of true love in life can become
ALL but a whisper is Love
All but a sigh is life.
sigh..
Karijinbba Feb 2021
One of you continues to ****
my head E-mailing from HP
covertly unprovoqued.
Your hateful angry senseless
defecated words
are your property not me.

"My roses aren't planted in your dark
nasty places for your misery and pain"
You aren't the center of my Universe
come out from your dark cloud
stop your pooping rain
on me find another victim.

Satan doesn't want you in hell
and God won't let you in
heaven.
~~~
By: karijinbba, 2020.
Elizabeth Henry his child molester
girl friend nurse from hell
1983 present
the other Charles manson
advocates
susan WR ratano
Arthur Rat human predators
traficants
users haters womb less
childless **** have no life
Jeff A, John Ch no cojones only selfish agendas blind deaf mute
habitual drug user *******
snakes in every mother's paradise
sadistic Nazis hiding under a new flag named Susan W Rat ta ta no
HP and Facebook
should require finger printing
to create accounts on here to not allow bullies maggots the stalker, sociopaths
writing about their excrement
Cease and desist.
Karijinbba Jul 2021
My lala sassy Coco beloved.
queens of purple heart mine.
to those loving me near or far.
~~~~~~~~~~~
And you sweetheart
You the awakened one when I fought to stay alive eons ago precioso mio.
Don't worry you woke me up
this thunderous hail winter
upon waking up opening my eyes
transforms to eternal spring.
And as the decades passed revealing so many secrets that you scattered of gold bars and treasures throughout Earth
for enchanted frog little me
in a tini pond destined to search you in your ocean

All treasures now conceived in thought understood grasped too late,
slide like water through my fingers
lost in inaction
Recaptured
in memory  thought apeacing me giving strength.

The mind makes everything that's gone very real.
Amorsitos, hermosos you have many names I know you by a few
my precious king of hearts
I own only my heart of gold
jewels are my kids all grown-up
I love your family jewels.
Cariños mios your hands your voice
the way you walk talk as if you sway me and visit me unexpectedly
and it happens often
~~~~~~
Lover long sun kissed limbed
It all lingers true and clear.
Any woman queen Angel or scribe
would go nuts just hearing your tantric sensual voice
but not the way like I can.
Holding your hands loving me imprinting me with
your fingers kissing your palm prints
all over my pristine remote
unexplored seashores.
In your Island for private
romantic lovers you and me
You must feel safe here dear
just a poetess dreaming of you.
My mind make it all real.
and it does again and again..
your voice bridges any gaps

Our dream breathes and lives
when I hear your voice you melt
me or freeze me evaporated me
I cry and laugh and hear God
speaking to me in your voice
it's all so amusing
And bittersweet
I miss and love you all so much
tini litt baby girls and boys mine
"I give my life to save yours
if only any of you ask, you wrote"
I love you adore you.
Te amo the amo.
~~~~~~
By Karijinbba
All rights Reserved
te camo yesterday today forever
Karijinbba Aug 2022
"Like a prayer in church to God
you are to me precious love: " "knowing you is loving you thus, Knowing me is loving me."
~~
How sweet lies sound near or far
how bitter truth tasted as
memories arrived so awkward
It's bitterness lessened with understanding true love
maturing sweetening and
cruel Mr Ttime relentless I'm
In silence and in time
God allowed me to see
where i erred and failed
.I ask God to show me to lead me
as head not as chopped up tail.

God showed me what I couldn't see
showed those I injured unintendedly
parroting unkind words in ignorance
what you want us all to see.
Please notice my lonely waves
Predictable unchanging.
Drop your pebbles in my sand pond
that everything in me may be altered in your grace Lord
Bless a peace my every loved one.
Remove all enemies from our paths.
Bring my loved ones back to my caring selfless Godlike realms
anchored in your mercy God..
~~~~
Karijinbba.
https://youtu.be/zRR1Lw5NW0o

We are one soul let no tongue fire in anguish untimely.
We got God's soul so we wait patiently
Even against all odds.
Karijinbba Jan 2019
Not all tree roots
need to be long or thick
to be strong mighty ever lasting.
trancending time and space

The strongest tallest trees
have SHORT roots tightly close interconnectedly
with many tree roots
by one amazing fact

being rooted from underneath very close to one another
Huddled in short proximity
it's how the strongest tallest trees thrive stronger live longer.
across time and space
lungs on earth for humans.

Nature teaching showing why
even poets lost in solitude
are as derooted weak trees
they shrivel and die

Here at Hello Poetry
we may willfully become stronger tightly rooted together
to grow taller stronger mightier
or perish for lack of unifying interconnectedness.
huddled root to root

I perceive a disconnection on H.P, among many poets
with thick long roots yet unable to stay connected with
one another in rampard discord  
some expecting benefits without any other concern but arrogance
and selfishness

Trusting unison powerful
indestructible succeeds interconnectedness.

Why not huddle up together
closer so noone deroots us.

i hunger for your view on this.
Nature is teacher at best
intermingling tightly
so closer in proximity
likewise
poet to poetess poem to poem
so that i may follow you
confident follow me
huddled up
root to root.
~~~~~~~~
By:Karijinbba
revised: 01-07-19
Union is power
I thank everyone who reads
very few honor me with your reposts
and i feel like a star when your own awesome impecable poetry
ignite brain storm magnificence
pure mind bending magic
i am learning from your greatness and i feel honored. In fact i learn even from those who jump the gun to judgements instead of asking me questions i am very sociable.
PEACE.
Karijinbba Sep 2021
Not in voice?
If I want to know
if he really loves me so
  in his kiss there's fire,
nowhere else I can know.
I felt this flame in one love
I find it again!
Because it's right
because I own this fire
and my lover owns same

No it's never too soon
or too late for true love
to meet half way masked
The Kiss! Anxient fire
ages asleep awakens díer
twin flames unrequieted.
Memory ignition the key
We long to see that face,
we die to hear that voice
our beloved breaths on.

Our grail lost found
so many times before
so many lifetimes on and on
twin soul ancient divine
the cosmic law of attraction
pairs up beings knowing
what we cannot unravel
we ask to see to marvel
as life times we struggle.
May we meet to tangle.

Let's not live of trinkets
dreams and memories
alone, sharks we are
no liquor can makes us
a sharks meal.
Why become ramora!

We're rascals Rhett
and his Scarlet renewed.
This world will never
own us, let's own it
we are the authors
of our own life and destiny
We know, we intuit
we are loved cherished
in ways so deep no words
exist to describe our
joy and happiness
the battomless loss
abyss free us in courage.
what we ask to see lifetimes before
is now reveled and revered.
~~~~
Oh the silky breath
my Angel once withdrawn
in sadness
my love returns priceless.
Softly as rose petals tikling
memory chip's lock snapping
the long gap banished.
~~~
By:Karijinbba.
https://youtu.be/i3mAG5TuS98
Karijinbba Mar 2022
His light house amidst
his mystic fog, signals belated
in triumphant decore,
Enamoured with ancient joy
of his blue green dreams
I chant.
“His rod and his staff
comfort me and all surrounding
gore departs.
I breathe in gasping
about my true love.
as he spots my battered
vessel into the wind sailing.
  Ecstasy twinkles his teary eye
   in the magic water dancing glare,
of our mystical full moon light.

For too long I've traveled
jeweled triumphant
yet unable to reach
his promised treasure vaults.

To the greed of legions on
treacherous paths all alone I wept,
through enemy's territories,
but all those from me have fled.

I roamed alone yester woods
I reach his safe private harbour
his peaceful shores.
As trustworthy jeweled queen
regardless of grave loss.

Willfully he reveals his home key
to come open up his door
as photographic memories
on new calming waters
get anchored deep.

At last I shall rest in love
on my bittersweet bed of roses
red, and flowers wild;
   white sad lilies on hand,
saluting my beloved glories
recaptured and retained.

Enduring rhythmic ways
with courage, heart
brain and hope and off my
survival modes into éasier dwelling
  into my grave but neither there
I shall trod alone no more.
~~~~~~
By Karijinbba
All rights.
https://youtu.be/rFEv_ZjCTuE
Karijinbba Mar 2019
Nothing hurts me more deeply,
then your
physical silence
and
indifferent
absence
so dead calm
not knowing
if you're living
or colder
in your grave

Speak to me
darling
I love you so.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
All rights reserved
Indifference as cold
as forgetting
an absent loved one
a painful un necessary tactic of "less is more"
in the solitary life
of a precious lover
left behind. Hate me
I beg you,your rancor hurts me less then being forgotten!( Revised comment 03-22-19)
Karijinbba Sep 2020
Your Joy is my joy
Your happiness my own
Our beginning bittersweet
Premonition of it's end.
Those I love the most
think of me today.
My dearest darling
beloved forever
m
o
r
e
Omnipresent remain
our treasure tree of life
our paradise lost and found.
~~~~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
~Copy Rights apply~
Sep-2020 revised 03-21.
https://youtu.be/67oftdPmix0

— The End —