Brighter than sun
Shiner than star
Glowed like a moon
King of my heart
Darkness followed no too far
Shattering the feeble
Glass of portrait
You painted so far
Monster lurking behind
Broke me apart
Left me too broken
Even to feel the rhythm of
You rolled the dice
I played along
Unaware of the pieces
Now it’s too late to
Dwell on the past
When future is too hazy
And present seems
A mess to sort
Glow lost its par
Disappeared shining star
A broken heart
Let's start new
We both sew
Ripping them out
Bleeding in process of
Inflecting more hurt
So, what you say?
Let's start new with
Love and no pain
I wish the stars c/u/t like
ripping op en
s k i e s I’ve never
I understand the intention wasn't to harm,
but each slash oozes a new hue of red
it leaks from my head, my eye sockets, my mouth
everywhere you could think
It jogs down my neck and mixes with stressful sweat
I'd look down at my feet, but I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to see them
I'm terrified of the possibility that if I thought to look down the only thing I'd see was a warm mahogany puddle
The neverending, searing pain contaminating my thoughts
dragging out and speeding up time
My hands have grown numb from trying to stop the gushing blood
You'd think by now I wouldn't feel the shooting stings, but I can feel it all
Every knife twist, or flea bite
I feel it all
the gnawing feeling at my heels begging me to double over
but I will not
I cannot let you know how you got to me
I will bite my tongue, and clench my teeth until I choke and drown in my own blood and gore
my cheeks will turn to a thick pulp before I admit I am in pain
Watch as my gallbladder seeps bile,
my appendix bursts,
and femur cracks
not knowing what to do with the pressure on my mind
i don't know which
I feel like ripping wet paper
and smashing mangoes against my lips.
I resent your heart
For ripping me apart
For shredding me to pieces
And bringing out weakness
Now I miss my painting.
While everyone was away, I decided to go for it and rip down my old art. I'd just been to the Royal Academy Art Summer Show and absorbed near 1000 pieces of art so I wanted to move on. Then someone emailed to ask to buy it. That painting had been on the wall since I was at school, about 19 years. Irritating me. Why now? Yes - life IS that strange. I think it was a test.
I could try sellotaping it back together.
The whispers that would once soothe now crawl down my spine like roaches invading wet wood.
My spine, turned to wood, splinters my heart.
And know it hurts to breathe but I do anyway because for a split second, pure air brushes against my lips, the way you once did.
I walk on broken glass, on my hands and knees clearing the way for you,
But you walk right over me looks across the ****** cracks on the floor. On my heart.
Why do I miss you. Why do I miss the cuts. Why do I miss the yelling.
Because I miss you. I miss the way you'd looked at me sleeping.
The way you'd watch me singing in the car.
The way you'd look at me while in your bed.
When did your eyes of love turn to lust?
When did I turn to a human being that meant nothing anymore.
When did 10 months of your life just hit ctrl delete and now you can't find the files but you are still my desktop picture.
How does this happen?
I try to rip apart your gifts on my dresser, and the pictures on my walls
but I can't because part of me is hoping one day you'll be at my door with my favorite flowers,
my favorite flowers,
my favorite flowers...
that I can't ******* think of because you have taken over my mind.
Tell me this is some sick joke
Please tell me this is some sick joke
Because I can't handle this sick life.
I see you walk. You don't walk the same anymore
I see you talk. You don't talk the same anymore.
I see you. You aren't the same anymore.
Tears streaming down her cheeks
Washing away her makeup
She looked a mess
This is the way she looked
The inside her heart was in pain
Her body was shaking
Her head was spinning
She felt broken
She was broken
The pain is ripping her apart.*