I see no love
in your eyes
or in your heart.
Togetherness is
what I crave for
but your actions
keep breaking my heart.

I see no warmth
in your words
or in your heart.
Forever is
what I crave for
but your actions
will break us apart.

let me write you
an eight words letter.

“I don’t deserve you
cause’ I deserve better.”

if you would’ve asked me;
why do I like you?
I’d have told you
countless things,
your heart or mind
wouldn’t know.

if you would’ve asked me;
are you really sure?
I’d take your hand
to walk you out
of the gloom
cause’ I wouldn’t
ever let you assume.

you tell me
I am a flipper,
no I am not,
if I am loved right
I am a keeper.

it was not a long ago
when we were so close,
but people come and go
and that's how it goes.

No, we are not fine on our own,
and that's why we leave
for reasons unknown.

Only if you knew
how much I
torture myself
to be with you
“just as a friend.”

I used to long for you
even when I knew,
I didn't belong to you.

you’ve been trying too hard to fall in love,
but when love comes to you in pieces;
you walk away, thinking it isn’t enough.

you’ve been trying to find someone mature,
but when stability comes into your life;
you find it boring in the first place.

you’ve been trying to fill your voids,
but when warmth tries to touch you;
you refuse it because you’re cold.

you’ve been trying to find perfection,
but no one is perfect and no one will be
yet you don’t care about who is there
cause’ what’s available to you isn’t worthy.

I know we are not a thing anymore.
I know that we don’t even need to be.
I know you have people next door and
I am the last that you would like to see.

I am sorry that I misunderstood things.
Thought you weren’t looking for flings.
I am sorry that I tried to fool my heart
when I knew you’re going to break it apart.

you've broken me into pieces
and in ways I can't be fixed.
You took away my bliss and
I'll never forgive you for this.

you leave your chats unread
thinking it’s uber-cool to ignore,
but one day you will be dead;
I won’t hear you from any door.

around you I feel so different
like I am in another dimension,
but nowhere to look and go,
just lost and waiting to be loved.

around you I feel so high
like I am on several drugs,
but not hallucinating,
only dreaming of you.

around you I have tangled thoughts
like if I would speak,
I just won't stop.

if you think writing about you
makes you the one in power
then you are so wrong cause'
you are just another piece
of my unsung song.

if you think leaving you
makes me constantly sad,
then you are so wrong cause'
you are just another story
that I left unsaid.

will you hold on to me
even if I won't be around?
will you listen to my words
even if I won't make a sound?

will you still love me
when I won't be so lovable?
will you still reach out
when I would be unreachable?

will you even miss me
if I won't ever call?
will you try to find me
when I won't like to be found?

will you still save me
when I won't like to be saved?
will you still fix my pieces
if I won't be that brave?

If you can be cold,
I can be colder.
If you can be strong,
I can be stronger.

I don’t want to see,
whatever you post.
I don’t want to know,
in whose arms you’re lost.

I don’t even care,
if you’re behind or ahead.
I don’t even care,
if you’re alive or dead.

I don’t want to hear,
only lies you would tell.
I don’t want to be there,
but I do wish you well.

I don’t even care,
if you’re behind or ahead.
I don’t even care,
if you’re alive or dead.

you have turned my life upside down
and made me change myself.
you have made me cold from inside out
and made me hate myself.
I will not be able to trust now
only because you happened.
I will not be able to love now,
only because we never happened.

I am scared to write a hello to you.
Can you be brave and text me first?
I hope it will not hurt your ego cause'
I am already afraid when I'm at my worst.

I am really scared to give you a call.
Can you be brave and take the fall?
I hope it will not hurt your ego cause'
at my worst I just cannot stand tall.

When you have to
stay away from them
and always just be quiet.

When you are in the darkness,
but forever wishing them light.

When you have to get
over them and move on.
When you are the weakest,
but always trying to be strong.

When you have to forgive
them for  not giving you
what you deserved.

When you have to understand
that sometimes you are
just never enough.

When you have to pretend
that you are fine without
them and act cold.

When you have to pretend
that you are nothing,
but brave and bold.

When you have to pretend
that you are always happy and high,
but deep down, only you know,
it's a lie.

All the pain
that you go through.
Believe me,
that's love too.

He went downhill;
waited with color in his eyes.

She went uphill;
acted like she was blind.

The day will come soon
when we will be smiling.
Under the bright sun
when we will be shining.

That night will come soon
when we will not be awake.
Under the moonlight
when we will not break.

At the end of the day,
I was meant to fall apart.
I cared for the one
who kept breaking my heart.

At the end of the night
I was meant to be awake.
I only cared for the one,
that was my only mistake.

At the end of the day
I was meant to be alone.
I cried for the one
whose heart was a stone.

At the end of the night
I was meant to die.
I believed in the truth
but the truth was a lie.  


-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

My mind can't remember
the colour of her eyes
and my heart is okay with it.

I guess that's closure.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

Wondering what should I say, cause’
it feels like, there’s nothing to see through.
Wondering what should I write, cause’
it feels like, the words have left me too.

Wondering where to begin from, cause’
it feels like, in the end there’s nothing new.
Wondering whom to look up to, cause’
it feels like, I am leaving everyone I knew.

Wondering if I should stay or leave, cause’
it feels like, nothing would make me wise.
Wondering whom to trust now, cause’
it feels like, eyes are only filled with lies.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

Fall in love with the souls,
not just pretty faces.
Fall in love with the whole,
not just good phases.

Fall in love with the scars,
not just what you can see.
Fall in love with the battles,
not just greatest victories.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I miss you
like people miss peace
when they are at war.

I miss you
like people miss summer
when it’s too cold.

I miss you
like people miss comfort
when they are in pain.

I miss you
like people miss that
one friend who has gone.

I miss you
more than you can think,
the more times your eyes can blink,
and more than you will ever know.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

It’s really been so quiet.
Can I hear your voice?
I’m tired of being strong,
wish I had another choice.

It’s really been so dark.
Can I feel your light?
I’m tired of being fine,
wish you were still mine.

It’s really been so awful.
Can you heal my wounds?
I’m tired of being alone.
Wish I could move on.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

The emptiness in my eyes,
The truth behind my lies,
The fall before my rise,
And the goodbyes;

It scares me.

The dark beneath my skin,
The light within my sins,
The voice that loudly sings,
And my broken wings;

It scares me.

The wounds I can't heal,
The pain I can't feel,
The loss I can't deal,
And when I am real;

It scares me.

The silence in my little talks,
The stillness in my moonlit walks,
The thought of separate ways,
And my numbered days;

It scares me.

The demons under my bed,
The words spinning in my head,
The blood in my sweat,
And my cold breath;

It scares me.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

You stood by my side
when I couldn't sleep
on cold and lonely nights.

You stood by my side
when I was losing
everyone in my sight.

You stood by my side
when I kept over thinking,
felt scared and terrified.

You stood by my side
when I wanted to quit
and commit suicide.

You stood by my side
when I wanted to hide.
You became my best-friend
and that's how I feel inside.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I think of you in the running showers.
I think of you in the scent of flowers.
I think of you when I am asleep.
I think of you in the memories I keep.

I think of you when I am low and high.
I think of you when I fail and try.
I think of you in summer and snow
I think of you in dark and glow.

I think of you in wrong and right.
I think of you in black and white.
I think of you in scars and screams.
I think of you in hopes and dreams.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

A dark room and sharp blades,
where the light of hope always fades.
And when it is the pain I need to feed;
the more I cut, the more it bleeds.

A lonely room and no ears,
where no one ever hears.
And when someone I need by my side;
emptiness seek and everyone hides.

A long way and no right road,
where my heart always explodes.
And when my secrets echo through time;
I remember when you used to be mine.


-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I cannot really tell you,
if you'd ask me what's wrong?
I wish you only knew,
the lyrics of my song.

I cannot really show you,
if you'd ask me what's inside?
I wish you only knew,
the secrets that I hide.

I cannot ask from you,
to be there all along.
I wish you only knew,
the lyrics of my song.

I cannot expect from you,
to look for me and find.
I wish you only knew,
all that goes through my mind.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

Someone, somewhere is creating life.
Someone, somewhere is ending it.
Someone, somewhere is loving life
Someone, somewhere is pretending it.
Someone, somewhere is getting loved.
Someone, somewhere is getting hurt.
Someone, somewhere is making promises
Someone, somewhere is breaking trust.
Someone, somewhere is telling lies
Someone, somewhere is believing it.
Someone, somewhere is causing pain
Someone, somewhere is healing it.


-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

Tell me your darkest secrets,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me your forbidden sins
or what keeps you awake till 4?

Tell me your deepest thoughts,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me all the battles you fought,
or what keeps you on the floor?

Tell me your truths, not lies,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me your failures, not tries
or what keeps you behind that door?

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

Someone pulled me closer,
when you pushed me away.
When you told me to get lost,
someone asked me to stay.

Tell me what I did wrong?
Tell me what I did right?
One threw me into the dark,
and the other, into the light.

While you counted my flaws,
someone loved me anyway.
While you ruined my nights,
someone saved my day.

Tell me what I did good?
Tell me what I did bad?
One made me the happiest
and the other, only sad.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

It's 3 am, when you try to seek for help.
It's 3 am, when you've tears in your eyes.
It's 3 am, when all the memories hit you.
It's 3 am, when you regret the goodbyes.

It's 3 am, when the darkness scares you.
It's 3 am, when you've noises in your head.
It's 3 am, when you miss everyone at once.
It's 3 am, when you wish you were dead.

It's 3 am, when you can't save yourself.
It's 3 am, when you get hurt a little more.
It's 3 am, when you just hate yourself.
It's 3 am, when you only feel insecure.

It's 3 am, when you love lyrics more, not song.
It's 3 am, when you only know what's wrong.
It's 3 am, when you are alone, no one to care.  
It's 3 am, when you ask if you belong somewhere?

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

You shouldn’t settle for someone
who is not even worth a single try.
You really deserve more than better
and please don’t believe it’s a lie.

You shouldn’t settle for someone
who treats you like a second choice.
You really deserve more than better
if you would hear your inner voice.

You shouldn’t settle for someone
who won’t catch you when you’d fall.
You really deserve more than better
cause’ remember you’ve had it all.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I am starting afresh, starting new,
not with the many, only with a few.
I left behind what did not grow,
held the door open, asked them to go.

For this year, my head is very clear,
who doesn't uplift you, really ain't your dear.
For this year, my heart is very aligned,
who is not kind, really ain't worth your time.


-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

In January,
I had fun.

In February,
I ****** up.

In March,
I was in a dream.

In April,
I woke up.

In May,
I wanted to die.

In June,
I even tried.

In July,
I also scored.

In August,
again got bored.

In September,
I missed her.

In October,
I wished her.

In November,
I felt alone.

In December,
I moved on.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I took the high road
while you were catching a plane.
We didn't put efforts to decode
instead we became strangers again.

I took the yellow pills
while you were dancing in the rain.
We never climbed uphill
instead we became strangers again.

I took the therapy
while you were inside my brain.
We never resolved our issues
instead we became strangers again.

I disappeared into the thin air
cause' you never felt my pain.
We were never meant for each other,
that's why we became strangers again.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

First your expectations get hurt
and then you just try to blend in.
You pretend everything is splendid
and then there comes your ending.

Second you try to stay away
so you won't get into the bubble.
You forget what you had to say
and then there comes the trouble.

Third when you want to call
so you don't want to be forgotten.
You try and get up knowing you'd fall
and there comes your rock bottom.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

You did the right thing by losing me
and I thank you for not choosing me.
You did the right thing by fooling me
and I thank you for not choosing me.

You did the right thing by playing me
and I thank for you not saving me.
You did the right thing by breaking me
and I thank you for not saving me.

You did the right thing by hating me
and I thank you for not loving me.
You did the right thing by lying to me
and I thank you for not loving me.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

When life knocks you down
and all just turns to dust.
I’d never make you frown
‘cause you always come first.

When your lovers will drown
and you have no one to trust.
I’d always be around
‘cause you always come first.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

They are a reflection
flashing against me fast.
They are seeking attention
from the faces of my past.

The demons are here
and looking for a ****.
I might die tonight
If I wouldn't stay still.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

I am alone.
With just some people I'm moving on.
Some talk less, some talk a lot.
I don't know if they are friends or not.

I am alone.
With some fears I'm moving on.
Some are scary, some are not.
I don't know if they are real or not.

I am alone.
With some deep wounds I'm moving on.
Some hurt more, some hurt less.
I don't know if they will heal or not

I am alone.
With a fake smile I'm moving on.
Sometimes looks good, sometimes not.
I don't know if it works or not.

I am alone.
With some burdens I'm moving on.
Some are huge, some are little.
I don't know if I will repay or not.

I am alone
With some secrets I'm moving on.
Some can save me, some can lead me to death.
I don't even know my remaining breaths.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj

You met me when I had no light.
You met him when you had none.
A farewell to you tonight
for I am going on a run.

You met me when I was alone.
You met him when you had won.
A goodbye to you tonight
since I was never the one.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj