Don't say you are using pen to write
When you're typing it on your phone
No one will truly listen... Everything I want to say or feel out loud will get me locked up in an institution. It's unfair. I can't speak without fear of someone deciding for me that I should be locked up. Don't tell me you know better than me and don't ******* tell me that you know what's best for me. You aren't in charge, you don't get to decide. If that means I have to be suicidal in secret then so ******* be it.
Oh yes sure, but as friend then?
- Why would you say that?
- Remember talking about respect when you wanted to fight?
This is also to me the only thing that makes me angry and want to fight. As you, I have a high respect of myself and don't like to feel ignore, disrespected. It might be a big word just to explain that i don't appreciate when someone read my messages and decide not to reply.
Listen, it's not against you, i understand, you are busy, I might not be your priority. But i learn over the past year not to let anyone taking the chance to be able to hurt me. You might not be the kind of guys who like texting fine, then you should have tell me (same way as you asked me why i left and i replied).
It was really nice meeting you, i would love to see you again but not without disrespecting myself. That's a lot of feeling, but after what i saw in you, I am sure you will understand. I am free tomorrow, if you understand that we can meet. If not i want to tell you that i also feel this connexion and wish you a beautiful week.
Self respect is a high value i want to keep. I am mature enough and have been hurt enough not to let anyone getting this power over me.
Some people talk to you in their free time and some free their time to talk to you, i am learning the difference and i am looking to let people in my life only with the second option.
If you are able to rise you standard to meet girls like me.
Mimic all that I do,
it's not good for you.
Do not be a fool.
You can fool
So many people.
But not me;
I will not drool
All over you.
Giveback my life.
No, I do not care if copying me is how you survive.
No, I hate you a lot... so goodbye.
I shouldn't call you so:
You're a *****, and I hope that you know.
I appoint you head ***** from now on.
It's about time that you've gone.
Ahaha this is a phat mood
PleAse don’t pretend
Lie to a child that somehow we are friends
Even if I try to extend
Your moving back into the future
And we won’t ever be kin
If that’s a game you’d like to play
Take your misery I’m not afraid to walk away
I didn’t make the simple mans mistake
I saw a virtue in the struggle of the wait
So when I don’t care to even glance in your eyes
Don’t act as if it’s some ill willed surprise
You had a chance just as I
And just as in that sense we are alike
I too can choose to exile your kind.
So this is me saying with clarity
You’ve exhausted all of my charity.
Done forcing myself to be “nice”. The truth is ultimatelykinder.
I could forget you
the damage you've done
and the pain you've brought
but in the end
I want to thank you
for bringing the pain
that made me stronger
and the harm you brought me
because at the end of the day
I am who I am
with no thanks to you.
I want to forget you
you've brought so much harm
and for what
your own amusement?
because your harm didn't tear me
to the ground.
In fact it made me a rising star
The name of the poem (s0 called): Kid with a borderline personality disorder needs some help or “bye bye” then
Sometimes it’s hard to be me
Feels like I lose my identity
And I’m fighting with my own self
Sometimes to death
And it seems like eternity
I say I mean it, indeed
This is a real struggle of me and me and
Not many people seem to understand
When I say
Sometimes I’m straight
Sometimes I’m ***
Grandma says what she’s supposed to say
“I never heard someone say
When I was at your age”
But honestly I’ve never been engaged
At times I feel I need to be fixed
My papa’s sure I need some kicks
On my ***
No more no less…
Talks to my dearest mom lead
To “You need to find a job, kid”
“Boy, what’s wrong with this
This is simply how the life is”
Sometimes I feel like I am someone else
Start making up, painting my nails
Sometimes I feel like I am a complete mess
Look up at the ceiling, lying on a bare mattress
Crying my eyes out
Longing the whole world to be dead
Shout out loud
All of my hatred
And then again:
A rollercoaster of my mood gets down
I ask myself who I am
The answer comes and makes me frown
In this big world I’m on my own…
On my own
Today is the day you can go **** yourself!
I wasn’t just on your mind
I wasn’t just in your heart
I wasn’t just your thought
I wasn’t just your feelings
On your walls
In your writes
Your glimmering eyes
Your lovely smiles
The reason for your impatience
The reason of your creations
A part of your soul
What made you whole
The kohl in your hazel eyes
The lows and the highs
Your first kiss
Your butterfly feelings
Your heart’s beatings
The mystery in your eyes
The misery in your cries
The joys in your laugh
The colors in your life
Your summer sunset
Your morning lust
Your late night gossip
Your love of life
The love of your life
But perhaps that’s all I am
A past, history, forgotten
Thanx for your appreciation on my first write here :)