no one knows,
everyone wants you,
you're never alone
beaten down, stumbling,
compassion for wasted beauty,
speaking for beauty of a generation,
I walk the earth with the undying feeling of all my insecurities being engraved into my skin, beaming for everyone to see.
Every encounter with a human being i'm attacked by a deafening melody of inadequacy.
In a crowd my flaws inevitably come out, bounce off of every soul in the room and come back to burn my bones.
I am blinded by the reflection of my distorted self in every pair of eyes i come across.
Self consciousness - unpredictable, untamed, merciless - she shoots out of my brain, makes a trip around the world at the speed of light, comes back to stab me in the chest. Multiple times. I stand no chance.
I'm crippled. I'm vulnerable. I'm retreating behind my fragile little glass wall.
I'm trapped in my own hidy hole again.
I haven't even said "Hello" yet.
I loved her,
Bought her lavish gifts and fur.
But all of a sudden things became blur.
I searched every corner, no sign of her.
I could conquer anything,
Choose wisely, Love better.
Don't be casual. I would prefer
Don't judge the book by its cover.
Love will abandon you.
Like it left me a loner.
Felt and wrote, alone in these quarantine days. Has anyone suffered a breakup during quarantine?
Sometimes I wonder what made you do it...
I hope it wasn’t pride.
But if it was, I can’t judge
Because I haven’t swallowed mine.
I guess pride is gonna be the end of us after all.
I used to long for you
even when I knew,
I didn't belong to you.
High above the prison cell
I started to itch, I started to smell
A loud cry broke out in the darkening sky
We were desperate
Desperate to die
To be rotting in soil is better
Than to be stuck in here forever
I am alone
And I refuse to believe that
People are my friends
It’s true that
They all just pity me
I’ll never accept the fact that
They like me for me
I can see that
They barely put up with me
I’m tired of hearing
It’ll all work out fine
I know that
I’m a loner
And I’m tired of thinking
I’m fine by myself
I’ll never say again that
I need people
And I won’t believe that
These are the lies I believed for so long, until I flipped the script.
Read it bottom to top to see the truth.
Check out my Instagram account @words_ofgrace to see a video of me reading this.
I have spent my life
looking through a window
at the colourful parade
my search for a door was futile
I really can't see a way in
no one notices me here
banging, shouting, waving
but I will make them look
I will make them stare
aghast in disbelief
I will cause a reverberation
around the world, steal screen time
in news reports and on tv
people will ask why, why
what went so wrong
how can we stop this
from ever happening again
Well there are all kinds of crazies in the world, sometimes you just have to let them in, but above all and most importantly, keep them away from guns.