There is no why
For now
Only goodbye...
For now

In a world
That makes no sense
I feel like a book
I don't understand
Language is foreign
My chapters incoherent
Mixed up
I love my Title
My cover art
Illustrations are grand
But my story
Makes no sense
Is this how my story
Will always seem?
Will I ever learn
How to read your story
If unable to know my own?
Needing to look up my small
Words
To understand your bigger words
Somehow
Someday
I may
Understand
I just hope it won't be
My last words

There is a chord
In your song
That makes me cry
It touches me
So deep...
I wish
It was
For me

You made me
Put my heart away
I put it on the shelf
It kept wanting to jump back in
But you told it to stop
Hope and pray
You meant
Wait...
Not yet
But
Soon

I dreamt of a man
I did not know
Sitting next to me
In a crowd of people
Tired and needing comfort
He held me like a baby
His arm around my waist
My head on his chest
I felt so safe
Only a little while...
People started criticizing him
For holding me like this
He got up from me
Starting to walk away
As I was
Looking at him
Wondering "where are you going"?
I still did not know this man
All I could do was watch him leave
He didn't even turn around
As people jeered him
He went away...
I do not think
I will ever
Know who this man
Is

My cat won't cuddle
Lost my car, too
Forgot where I parked
I'll just watch some
Jeapardy clues
I have no snacks
And my boots are broken down,
Mary Lou
hates the word slacks, and with mixed drinks, she goes to town!
I lost my dog
I lost my truck
I lost my girl
I wonder what's on Cozy TV right now?
Pretty sure it's Monk
Sorry, I got distracted, Mary Lou
Sad you're
Feeling melancholy and blue
I mean it's my only pair of shoes
Can you fix my boots, please ?
With some whiskey
Or some twine
She said
"Try some shoestring
Even try some wine"
Walking all over town
Pondering
Mary Lou
That's actually how my boots feel
Right now...
Very blue
And it's not
Not just my shoes

If your heart breaks
Into so many pieces
Are you allowed
To pick any
Of
Them
Up?
Or do you
Leave
Them
Be?

Her......

We may not
Be able
To heal
Each others wounds
But we can
Compare
Share
And
Admire
Each
Other's
Scars

If your heart is divided
And both sides break
What is it called?
Quadruple
Heartache?

Today feels like a dream
Years ago dreamt
Of when you left me
Alone in the woods
In a dark colorless cabin
You took the warmth
You took the light
You took your family
And you left me there...
Alone.
Today
Feels like that dream

In the heart of darkness
Is
A delicate candle
Fragile
Way
Down in the corner
Waiting...
Waiting in smallness
Hoping to
Light up
The wick is burnt
To a crisp
Bring a knife...
A gentle touch
And some matches

The only cure for me
Is your voice
And
I admire the
Stunning
Bottle
It
Comes
In

The blood dried in my veins
Your soul was my life breath
But
In time
I could not feel you
Anymore
And that
Is what
I missed
Most

This rose has thorns
She let bees in
Needing to live
One sting from this
Protector
Can ****
That who pulls
The petal off a
Newborn rose
Before it blooms
Yes in sacrifice
Yet
Worthwhile
In my garden

The sun was so blind
Can't see in front
Of me
Good thing
Morndreaming
Exists
I missed my turn
And still you made it
Into my heart

I found a
Broken
Piece of a
Puzzle
And it
Fits
My
Chaos...
Perfectly
Belonging
In my
Universe

My adoring stare
Loves you
Like I'm yours
But I stay behind
With my eyes down
So you may not know
For fear you may erase
Both our smiles
With the doubt
In your mind

There's
A thick dust
On the horizon
Let's hurry before
They get here
The judges
Of our risky behaviors
Driving too fast
Because we are
Alone in a car
Tracing our veins
Like a road map
With the metal wire
I used to remove your
Prison bond
Smokin' tequila
Marinating our
Organs with some agave
In our new
Beautiful shiny home
While I shower off the dust
I feel your dark protective image
Standing so close like a
Shadow
You say let's go now
And
Do things we've never done
Because once they show
Up
We'll be gone

You know that little
Grooved space
Just above
Your cupid bow
Lip?
I read somewhere
It can be
Dangerous

I want to be wrapped up
In our own atmosphere
Our own fresh air
Where the breath
You breathe
Becomes
My lifeline ..
So make sure
It's minty fresh

Are the many
Shades of rain
Just
Umbrellas
In a crowd
Or my sadness
When
I have to say goodbye
Walking away
Leaving
Instead I wanted
An embrace
But
There's no room for
Us
So much
Crowding in our world
I wonder if I'll ever
Reach you
In all of these
Shades of rain
Maybe
Our sun will
Shine
For a short while
The shades will go down
And you will
See my happiness
When
You're coming
My way
Holding
Your hand out
To touch mine...
But that's all...
Putting my shade
Back up
For the next
Rain...
I know it's coming

Wishing for a pure love
The kind that
Wants to make me shine
When I hear your voice
Wants nothing for itself
In return
The kind that walks on white
Warm sands
The kind that comes
In a drop
Of rain
Falling on the leafs dry vein
The kind that looks like
A child giggling while
Twirling in the sun with her tresses
Entwined in flowers
Respect enough not to force affections
Or expect it as something in return
The kind that teaches
The kind that learns
Pure and innocently
That wishes everything good
For others
While it waits for
Its turn

Sometimes
I want to go back
In time
Collect everyone
I've ever known
And loved
And as a child  
Put them in a box
And keep them
Protected forever

There are people
Who can cause
Your pain
By doing
Nothing.
That nothing
Is something
For you.
There are people
Who can relieve
Your pain
By doing
Nothing.
That nothing
Is everything
For you.

Contemplating
Sitting
Sunny tinted window
Watching a little palm
Flutter in the wind
Not sure if it's the quiet
Creaking of the room
Or the lack of
Sound
I got an overwhelming
Sense of nostalgia
For peace of mind
It almost hurt
To think about...
When did I last have it?
...
It was so long ago

Changing
Your font
Makes you
Harder
To
Read

Gained a lot
From all the
Processed
Words
Put
In my mouth...
Now
Nothing
Fits

Not everything
Heals...
But
It
Tries

There are many
Layered shades of me
From light to dark
I always stop and think
Which one blends
Best
With
Yours?
And when?

I can only hope
For all of them
All the time

You can know
If a heart is tender
If you touch it
First

The dark clouds
In my window
The bright sun
Blanketing across
Those dark clouds
In my window
Knowing what was coming
Excitedly
Like a child
I ran outside
To capture a rainbow
Instead I saw
Your smile...
Captured
I was

I wish you could see
The depth in me
The strength in me
For you...
I think you see the
Weakness in me
Because the weakness
In me
Is for you...

I want you
To know
Both

Living from the longing
In your heart
Is something learned
It takes practice
It's sweet
It's innocent

Can I do it?
I don't know.
My longing
Is to know this
Feeling

If you're going to wait
Make sure it's
Worth it
By
Making sure
There's
No need
Keeping track of
The
Time
You are
Waiting

The absolute
Best part of
Good friendships
Is having that safe place
To land
No matter where you
Are jumping from

I saw a cloud
One lonely whispy cloud
In the very blue sky
The edge was on fire...it was blushed
Peach
I looked again...
I saw a cloud
On fire...for just a moment
The sun had kissed the cloud
Goodbye for the day
On the right edge of it lips
On the edge of its smile
The clouds smile
Then
I looked away
And pretended not to notice

A beautifully crafted design
The one thing I was drawn to most
Was a flaw
An imperfection
It stood out to me
As uniquely different
Not to everyone
Only to me
That's what I loved most
That's the one I wanted
That's how I knew
It belonged
Only
To me

My emotions
Get the
Loudest
In my
Safe zone

I wonder
How much ground
Would be covered
By the shadow
Of a man?
Depends on the man
I suppose.
And where
He stands
His ground

Standing in
Your shadow
Not able to see
Or feel
The light
Source...
Sometimes
It's not so easy
To just
Move

I soaked my heart
In the colors
Of your love
And everything
Came out clear

Seeing the soft red silk
White green yellow hues
The arrangement
It touched my heart
I nearly cried
I never saw anything this beautiful
And spoke so elegantly
Except you

I was never jealous of you
I was jealous of the people
Who were blessed
To be near you

Looked up to your atmosphere
Saw a little girl with wings
Painting the sky with the
Clouds
Brushing them up
And letting them flow
Like she did
With her mommy's hair

I rode by a Cemetary today
A very old one
I had never seen before
The headstones...people here
Long before me
Lay there resting
Did they know anyone
Who rest there with them?
Very likely
Did they love anyone
Who rest there with them?
Even more likely
It made me incredibly emotional
To know how much past loves
Were resting there
It made me happy to think love existed
But it made me sad that it also ended


(Sometimes I think too much)

In a world
Of potatos
Be a
Tater tot

Something about the light of day
Going away
Everyday
Makes me yearn for
Something more
Puzzled what it could be
Those minutes maybe?
Already missing the warmth
Your smile gives
Filling a heavenly void
I just saw you yesterday
But now you aren't here
Why do you break my
Fragile heart
Every day?
Please dont go
Away
I wish for once
You would turn around
And see my sadness

Do you learn to love
Yourself
By absorbing the love
Others give you?

The lessons we learn
Can feel empty,
I'd rather be a teacher

I listened
To the dessert you made
I tasted
The lyrics you sang
Your eyes got jealous
So I felt
Everything you
Touched with them