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Nylee May 2017
Just expect sun
     to come every morning
and nothing else
Nylee Nov 2017
My wings don't open
when it is time to fly

My hands shiver
before even I try

My mouth stutters
before I can explain why

My head shuts down
as I blink my eyes

I have aged
still I want to cry

nothing works fine
this piece is faulty

there is something seriously
wrong with me.
Nylee May 2020
I am unnoticeable
Hardly visible
You can see right through me
I am part of the air
My presence is an absence
Void is my existence.

I don't exist in anyone's mind
I don't have place in anyone's heart
My shadow is so faded
No one sees it, no one minds it
Believe me you won't believe me
Cause you will not see me at all
.
Nylee Oct 2019
Wondering about this
this memory brings up that
that night was so cold
Coldness after the fight
Fought with sharpest words
Words fell like bullets

The day was chilly too
Too silent the next morning
morning light was faded
fading memory but guilt
Guilty feeling blues feel
Felt the silence ****

The evening was short
Short conversation starts
Started random talks
Talked everything but problem
Slowly we forget
Forgotten why we fought

It is a routine
Routine continuing
Continuous cycle running
Run to same beginning
Beginning of another talk
Talk that ends with fight.
Nylee May 2020
I haven't been myself since a long time
I've been lost since the day I was born
Looking into things to find myself
I've forgotten to look what is inside
The conscience has now gone silent
The light inside has gone dim
In this life ride, I've run after manufactured dreams
The world has designed and defined
What success and happiness should mean
But the words never have seen to come true
I've wasted many seconds, I have lost years infact
Believing the lies I've been listening throughout life
To find happiness, I've sacrificed the peace of mind
There is no way I'll find
What I seek if I continue ahead with this path
Look inside, find the divine
It is obvious, the answer is me
but, who am I?
why
?
Nylee Apr 2020
I am most true
in poetry,
sides of me
which i never knew
comes alive
writes verses,
disappears.
Unaware me,
cannot identify
a soul to soul
melody
passes through words.
It is gold dust
touching the being
vanishing out the window,
through walls
and in the deep blue sky
.
Nylee May 5
I'll belong if I am me

But If I am anyone else
All I want is to fit in
I won't ever win

the game is twisted in design
And I am forbidden
To cross the drawn line.
Nylee Sep 2019
The more we know, the less we say
All the spoken words have its consequences
The more is told in silences

The words omitted but heard clearly
What we listen, the words crafted carefully
They deceive the ears that surrounds

Every other agenda works on
What favours whose manipulation
The smile contains no smile
The efforts put to take another mile
Snooping and buttering on sides
Friends and foe, no one decides
Act so nice, what is inside
no one knows till the very end

Dress so good, please all eyes
Give help when it is noticed
Out of sight then eyes vanished
Deceptive tricks up the sleeve
It matters not whom we believe

All playing game with roll of dice
Keeping friends close, enemies closer.
Nylee Nov 2017
I
am
going
to
get
lost
on
this
page
as
you
scroll
down.

Nylee Apr 2017
Be like mirror ,
                 give what you get
Nylee Mar 2019
When you keep on compromising
      forgo something for someone
          you are building someone's expectation
        and a slightly false picture of you
  because they will make you let go of everything
thinking it is natural for you.
Nylee Mar 31
You know one day would come
where I would learn
everything I did do
what was it for
Maybe it was all a bit nothings
the all little that makes me worry
it was just without a meaning
in the bigger picture of things.


And all the things I don't see
I see it all in retrospect
Loving that it all connected
Making it so seamless, breazefull,
Gripped and vengeful my soul now
Calm down, and hold your horses.


Destiny is a gamer,
In foreground, it is not apparent
But let these leaves change colours
and we'd see a beautiful scenery
Of a human's journey.
Go
Nylee Feb 2021
Go
Jet set
Let's leave
Leaving no trace behind
Like we never existed.

Let's escape to another world
It is not strange
If we stayed any longer
We'd bleed out
sweat, dreams and blood,
eventually like all others do.
Nylee Jun 2023
It is surprising to find all the things I have written in the past
with what thought were they even be crafted before,
I see all of it as a brand new thing on the screen
It invokes the mind with a different view while reading,
I don't agree with many things, yet I believe in those words
dancing on my eyes, a continuity of my mind.
Nylee Feb 2021
No one catch up to me
I am far too gone

There is no map to place I go
There are no lingering footsteps to where I am

You'd miss me
for a day or two
but then, time fixes it
and I'd be a distant memory
Nylee Nov 2017

Even my good days are
pretty bad.
Nylee Mar 2017
Not every morning shines bright
Not every night is without the light
But everyday is a fight
so hold your fists tight
to remain awake and aware till the goodnight!
Nylee Jun 2023
I saw you the other day
by the bus stop,
on that rainy saturday, hey!
I have you stuck in my mind
and when you smiled
I saw the entire universe
right in front of my eye,
a spell you did on me.

It was magical,
In a trance,
dazed and lyrical,
I made plans of you and I
but, wait,
let me catch my breath!

I have sailed to the next shore
why do I weave hope from you
To do something I never could do
Love me so
so unconditional
how do I know,
You'd treat me better than I treat me?
Nylee Oct 2019
Wet paint!
Well it is.
Obviously I'll try
The sign was right
Now,
stuck to my hand
the colour green
I facepalm!
Nylee Apr 2017
Hello , how are you ?
Hope you are enjoying a nicer view .

Hope you know and understand
the mistakes , I am making these many days .
And even in future  , making new set of them ,
But I hope you are braver in the face of problems .

You know ,
Life could have been much easier
if you could write back .
But ,
that way , maybe
each time , I would be re-writing you
Talking to future me
Nylee Apr 2023
I gave my everything
I was a disappointment
I see it now,
stamped all over
I have no cover
Everyone knows it
I have no one to blame,
Nothing to claim.
Nylee May 2020
It's a routine
and there is a disruption
Everything is fine
On the surface
Dig deeper, an eruption.

Let's believe in it
but worry is constant companion,
Hope is whimsical
It flutters and breaks
And burns again with flame.

It was a dream,
A beginning and the end,
A living breathing trend.
But a life is beyond imagination,
Ups and downs and a show.

Now to this slowdown,
We don't know,
The time in abundance
Is going to drain
A fear turning to a new name.

The year has been
straight out of some ******* movie
It is building and building
and no one knows
what kind of end it will bring.
Nylee Feb 2017
Unaware and Distracted
Walking through the path
leading to endless darkness
following a bright illusion
keeping my hand forward
closing my fingers to hold
but as I touched it,
It disappeared in front of my eyes,
Leaving me dazed and alone in the dark,
Not knowing where I am,
and how to get out,
I am Lost.
Nylee Jan 2022
I don't get nights sleep
I hear your words repeat
in my mind's reach
I need a break,
Please don't speak.

People like to preach
Assure their life is perfect
Have their hands on mine to dissect
Maybe I am nature's freak

Don't need your poke of stick
But a part of your speech
Found a place in my heart to creep
Makes it harder for me to breathe
Your sharp edge cut this deep

I need a break.
I am still awake.
Nylee May 2017
I exist
in this very minute
as you read it
Nylee Mar 2020
Every thing has changed,
Nothing is the same.
I know more about not knowing
What will come next,
Just holding my breath.
Nylee Jun 29
Sun dips, paints the sky ablaze,
with monsoon on the rise, the gloom yellow daze.
Folds of the bed, a sunken cove,
Hours swallowed whole, oblivious of.

Confined to the bed, my hold constricted,
Out there so much, vibrant, unrestricted.
I look to the lime yellow wall space,
more than a year, a neglected chase.

The vast unknown, I look from the window,
look at the people, come and go,
while I see them afar, are they happier than me
Do they feel as imprisoned as I be?
Nylee Mar 2017
The light flickers in my head ,
The idea comes and goes out ,
But none of them will be much help ,
Because I feed all my doubts
And I do not have the support
I do not see much positive scope
There is nothing good there
I feel I am tied to a single rope
And there is no one to care
Insecurity has power over me
Says that I will never be good enough
It leads to nothing but misery
For I do hear all that stuff
Nylee Apr 2018
Will I find you
in the shadows
looking over me
Will there be you
or it is just the continuation
of recurring hallucination.

It is getting trickier
to place you between
the imaginary and real you
both out to mess around me
your madness is catching me
the shady creature
filling my head space.

Manipulative ways
simply tracking my businesses
connecting into the web
stalking at all time
triggering an all kind
paranoia.

Invading in was easy
but the red light is on
between the scenes
the mask flew away
true colours will come out.

Holes in your plans
aren't as visible to you
the green figures
through the night vision
has come to play too
this exposure to the truth
keeps me sane
you got a new player
in this game.

I am counting the days
waiting for you in the shadows
to watch you
fall into your traps.
Nylee May 2017
I see the mirror in your eyes
Which shows the truth about the lies
                         I lie to myself
I see the emotion in your eyes
Which shows the pain you try
                          hide from yourself
I see myself in your eyes
There is the same emptiness
               I don't want to ever see again
Nylee Mar 2020
Why do you do what you do

What is my folly

You and me

Why me

You do this to me

I exist too

With pain and hope

This is not the first time

Please.
Nylee Apr 2018
not important
not me
not much
not enough
no one
none.
Nylee Sep 2018
little longer
a bit more stronger
and so much more
I hope for.
All the papers
I just tore
my dreams not
reaching their shore.
Well before,
so much better
heart sheltered
I, not deserted.
Everything I wore
all filtered
refined to core
expressed.
Could go ahead with
all that
keep quiet
be that
watch and mimic
being sick
in head.
Nylee Jul 2020
Amazing
how the day spins
There are chains in
All entwined in

Amazing
How little my life means
To those I give my everything
it is humbling, to know your meaning

Amazing
In the scope of greens
I am a tiny speck of red
a very lonely feeling

Amazing
Cannot say anything
Without meaning other things
Deciding against it
The purpose defeating

Amazing
It is so small and beautiful
I am noticing the life beyond my life
I cannot help dreaming

Amazing
Every good thing
That happens after bad ones
That helps us forget
The last thing

Amazing
I am still living breathing
It is gratifying
How human is still a thing

Amazing
is my heart still beating
And it always for me.
Nylee Sep 2020
Things are happening in the shadows
I am aware, but unaware
What takes place in those dark places
Then I think, should I care
Should I not,
Is it okay, if it is not.

Time is of essence, I am losing it
What's to come, it is happening
I am affected, should I be affected
It is out of my hands
Should I try to grasp it
Maybe there is more to come.

It is dark, the day hasn't began
No truths have come to light
It is all well hidden
The plotting and plans unfold
The sequence it uncoded
I should have been prepared, no?

But no, there comes a fall,
A dive, trust shattered
Heart battered,
It is all too fast
Yes, I would move on
Leave behind the baggage I don't want.
Nylee Jan 30
This is how you lose it
there was momentum
in the beginning you had nothing
And it follows you across till the end.
Nylee Dec 2023
Within my heart, a flame so bright,
A beacon in the darkest night.
Though others may not see its light,
It guides me through, with all its might.

Alone I stand, but not afraid,
For inner strength is my sweet aid.
My solitude, a gift so rare,
A time to breathe, to heal, to care.

Little joys, like morning dew,
Refresh my soul, and see me through.
I close my mind, embrace the day,
And let my worries fade away.

No need for others' approval now,
I've learned to love myself, somehow.
My worth is not in their embrace,
My inner light, my saving grace.

Though I may stumble on my way,
My inner strength will guide the way.
With conviction strong, I'll walk alone,
And find my path, my destined home.

My heart beats strong, it doesn't break,
For inner strength is my sweet stake.
Though others may not understand,
My inner light will guide my hand.
Nylee Apr 2020
I always felt that i was rare
my name was written
for a beautiful fate ahead
i believed and I cared
but maybe I was just a spare
it is evident as of late
or it was like this forever
my eyeglasses weren't clear
so now that i see
as I compare me and her
and them, it feels so obvious
but there was nothing
I could have done different,
so I was blissfully unaware
I don't have another pair
and there is nothing to repair
it is a line to follow ahead
where life is not fair.
Nylee May 2020
every bit of kindness will
          find you again
.
Nylee Aug 2020
Be ready to be locked outside
I am scared of all things that are happening
I keep all the doors and windows closed
I'd rather be alone inside
please do not knock

knock, knock
who is there?
Nylee Nov 2020
I've been sitting on the top of the ladder
looking at the world from the high I can reach
every once in a while someone glances my way
I look back straight in the eye till they look away.

There is peace which I can attain here
no one looks down on me even if they want to
But there is nothing straight up to my height
Everything is placed below my sight.
Nylee Dec 2019
Do what your head tells you to
Before it tells you not to.
Nylee Jul 2020
It is so beautiful to see
In the memories we'd be.
Nylee May 2021
Why bind me to my own words
You are free from all the strings
I am not moving in years
But you've been flying ever since.
Nylee Mar 2017
Many things in my life, unsorted
many thoughts in my life, uncategorized
many mysteries in my life,unsolved
many potentials in my life, untested
many emotion in my life,unlabeled
many problems in my life,remains unresolved
many days pass away, unnoticed
                          and still, my life continues...
Nylee Mar 2023
My chest is heavy,
The inside is hollow
All the thoughts in my head
I can't keep them all.

In many ways
Little of me losing away
I keep pondering
Why me, why indeed?

Unbearable at times
The misery madness
The reason of existence
unanswered and the end.
Nylee Apr 2020
Everything is a jigsaw,
I need to piece it back
Together
.
Nylee May 2023
I too get the scores that i hide
But to whom will i confide
It is the time of trouble
The world doesn't smile
Why should I smile back
I got nothing to crib but I crib
Because I have nothing
The life didn't happen to me
I got no disclaimers
What this to expect
Now I have to figure
Do I even live
Am I part of this world
Or should I just edit
the words I use to tell you my story.
Nylee May 2018
Burning the last of her
             to be their only source of light
.
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