Stop, step away.
I am not in narrative
Let's keep it that way.
the trees are budding
and everyone is sneezing
but I breath easy
i put my phone down and made this observation around me. very happy winter is gone.
I can see cleary the scene where we first met
I feel the warmth of your smile
I hear the glee in your voice
I am entangled in the thought of you
And when I saw you walk towards me
I felt as if the heavens blessed me with an angel
And When I saw you walk past me, I knew I was only in your path.
I am entangled in the thought of you, and why I am unwanted.
I hear the silence in your void, your words are never for me.
I feel the darkeness settle over me again, where it always is.
I can see clearly the scene where we last met.
Discarded. Forgotten. Unwelcome. Me.
I want to be your cliche
your now and your later
I want to wake in your arms
with my heart pressed against yours
I want to share your blanket
as we gaze at the stars
I want to protect you from all your fears
the way you protect me from mine
I want so desperately to see you happy
so when you say you love him
I can only hope he will make you smile
the way you make me
Thoughts or actions with no care ahead
you speak simply without worry about what you said
you can laugh without getting upset
or stand up without heat rushing to your head
eyes you know are there
yet how are they no where to be seen
I don't make a sound
for the fear of feeling drowned
that comes anyhow
but not for not making a sound
instead for not being allowed
why am I casted the spell on
when I see everyone around me free
yet I can't even plea
and you can't see me
If I could only make a wish
so that you could see
This isn't me
please do not confuse me
with the person i used to be
she does not live here anymore
we are no longer linked
we are no longer synced
she does not reside here,
I am not her anymore
Every day I wake up
I look at the ceiling
My soul goes back to sleep
Every moment I get up
My body is filled with sadness
Hopefull wishes that don’t exist
Black cloud that don’t belong here
Trying to perfect for the wrong people
Saying to myself every day “I’m not myself.”
Waking up to a smile on my face
But in reality, I really want to cry
I don’t want you to understand
Only I can determine that
Dark black hole
I keep falling in and I can’t get out
Please god help me
The more you say
The more I cry inside