Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Khoi Jun 18
The attic statics
Viceroys of the white noise
The devils finest
Daivik Jun 8
You are entitled to your opinions
And we are entitled to not giving a f..k
I ordered chicken at a restaurant yesterday,instead they gave me duck

I really want to leave this town
On my face i wear a tired frown
Let me tell you the story of the boy who wore gowns
He died

Love is at every corner
Especially if you have money
I love bees,but I hate their honey
The day is rather cloudy ,i hope the night will be sunny
I'm so funny

My imaginary girlfriend
She died in a car crash
Which reminds
I just have no cash
I'm so not funny
But I do want your money

Thank you for wasting your time
I don't care,I'm a hare
I really don't care
I care
Rob-bigfoot Jun 6
Cryptic crossword clue
Find film in 'springtime blossom'
Gone with the Wind - groan!

© Robert Porteus
Rob-bigfoot May 24
What I lack is a porpoise in life, or do I mean dolphin?
My head is full of This n’ That, brain all a’clutta,
Joan the Mad married Philip the Handsome, imagine!
Michelangelo designed the Swiss Guard uniform, clever fella!

Yes, landlocked Bohemia once had a navy!
A very dubious Shakespearean titbit,
‘The little dog barks but the caravan passes by’
Chekov, I think, but Star Trek chappie or Russian poet?

Sadly, Virgil hero of the Classics, is now barely known,
All hail the other Virgil! the Colossus of Liverpool!
‘You’ll Never Walk Alone’
No not that version! Carousel you fool!

Ambergris used in perfumes, is present in a whale’s whatsit,
Also, in the **** glands of dogs, but let’s not go there!
Think before buying an expensive bottle, best kept a secret!
Must be the vet’s worst nightmare, I swear!

There was a noble Italian Poet named Count Mario Stanza,
Did you know Nicholas Breakspear is the only English born Pope?
Mario cheekily claimed descent from Catherine of Braganza!
Nicky took the name Adrian IV, very lucky to escape the rope!

Catherine was the wife of Charles 11 of England,
Now this is getting silly! time for a nap I think,
End of history lesson, sorry getting pompous for a split-second!
In need of a large brandy, which tout de suite I will greedily sink!

© Robert Porteus
Bits and pieces of, well, This n' That
neth jones Apr 8
that devil Billy Brate got nerve
took me to the green woods all excited
but t'was all for piping like Pan
       just what he was giddy for
             and i a reclined detainee to fawn

hollow reed whittled finger holes
he challenged natures birdsong
      and came up shrill and dry
hollow reed
      and i am boredom fed under duress
(how a girl
      can mock up an impressed
                                       gaze of awe)
it's all exhibit
a picture for his court mates to deride
he can swell his fellas with the media ;
he mistook another girl
           down deep in Foxlease Thicket
Written for a contest. Contest closed early. This would have been the entry. The challenge was to do a poem inspired by an old print of a young guy and girl hanging out in the woodlands. He plays on a pipe whilst she lies there with a neutral expression on her face. The instruction is to channel Silvia Plath. I fell short on that front.
neth jones Mar 10
let rot my mental status                                                           ­       
to fruit the flies
billow the belly through the button                                          
                                                      throat the needle thru the eye
sleeve the lamb back into the mutton
and make a glutton
of our air supply
guff it all out
My Dear Poet Feb 2
A lizard and a tatt!
imagine that…
his lover left before she came
gone on a whim
leaving him
with a tattoo of her name

now full of regret
but soon will forget
when his words finally come true
his promise of change
never too late to arrange
a shed of skin and off with the tattoo
hey Mo I ain't ever seen you
looking so
why oh why are you
looking so
I really reallly
want to

well the reason why I'm
looking so
is cause I've been
my act didn't well please
the ones afflicted with that
cancel culture disease

cancelled for good
cancelled for life
cancelled like a six  
p.m. flight

hey Mo you can't get around  
looking so
you just got to get off that

don't let that cancelling
get you
cause I don't like looking
at your downcast
yeah a smile is the
thing I must
that'll show them
that I don't
Daivik Jan 27
"It is very important not to mistake hemlock for parsley, but to believe or not believe in God is not important at all."
-Denis Dedirot(idk who,some random old guy)
HTR Stevens Dec 2021
Merry Christmas and all that
Do put on your tinsel hat
Humour does not go amiss
To one and all blow a kiss.

Rules are for some - not for all
Well! this is quite a close call
Remember to doff your hat
Aye, the Queen can greet the cat.

Twinkling stars and fairytale
Flying carpets never fail
From all our eyes drop the scales
Re-mix and spare the details.

Living in a "Wonderland":
My eyes can feel grit and sand
Like floating in outerspace
With a mask across my face.

Earth has had a thorough shake
The world is due a re-make
We'll see what lands on the top
For success, failure or flop.
Next page