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1.9k · Apr 2018
Suicide note
Everyday I wake up with the storm in my chest
No, you don't know nor understand
I am okay or somehow I look okay
My mind is clear,
My heart in turmoil
The knife in my hands ready to stab my heart out
I am exhausted, yet I want to ****
End not your life but mine.

I am ambitious
Sinner for her ambition
Deserves nothing but a life sentence
Behold, the disappearance of my presence

Eyes are watching.... judging...
Do I deserve their piercing gazes?
Probably.
I've let down the people in my life,
The ones that really matters

Now, I am surrounded of booming laughter
Thy name, hold up to shame
Ridiculed for trying to achieve a star so far
I should have known that it's impossible to fly.

This suicidal note is not for you
It is for me, for I need to calm my nerves
For I am holding the knife that is ready to rip my heart.
1.7k · Jan 2018
Happy New Year
Let everything be in its prestine condition
Hold on to your ambition
2017 has already ended
But don't worry my friend
Here is a new year
A new beginning for us all
No need to fear
Because God will hear your call
So let us welcome 2018
And it will be good to us all
Here is a new year to reaching our dreams and leaving the bitterness of the past year.
*HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS
Greetings to you all!! :*
1.2k · Aug 2016
Mem'ries of a Ghost
Memories, nothing but memories
It is over now.
Time to cross the light and set my spirit free.

Once in a lazy afternoon
A door opens to a new wonderland
Another fairytale to tell
A man white and shining
Has captured a damsel laying on the floor.
He is her perfect prince charming
Memories this is nothing but a memory.

Beauty in the coffin,open your eyes
From this Charming's kisses, you'll be entice.
I will break the spell.
I will take you out of hell.

Memories, nothing but memories.

My friend. My lover.
My savior. My everything.
Let's be together, and live happily ever after.
Together let's be Gods.
With you and me, we'll survive all odds.
Memories, nothing but memories.

Same scars, same wounds.
In the forest we will fight those hounds.
Prince in a white and shining armor
Together we dance in glamour.
Memories, nothing but memories.

A kingdom we've built
With every drop of blood and sweat
Has somehow turns sour
On each passing hours.
Memories, nothing but memories.

On her's
On the damsel's
On the princess'
On the queen's
On my mind.

Slowly these things passes
As my body fades and turns translucent.

*Gone amongst the wind.
These mem'ries I keep.
Just my thoughts on a life being forgotten.
930 · Apr 2017
Averted Attention
Something inside my chest is creeping
A void of darkness that keeps me blinded.
As the fog covers my eyes I lose every drop of humanity
Without my humanity I'll lose my sanity
To maintain my sanity I indulge to ****** activities and found a *paradise in hell
Pretty bad.
873 · Sep 2019
Sunday Moon
Take a seat when you're tired,
Wipe thy face till your tears dry.
I just hate seeing you cry.
Listen to me as I sing a lullaby,
And to your concerns say goodbye.
Your weariness takes a toll on me
So do your best and to your sorrows, breakfree
Sleep now, my love, for our tomorrow
Be jovial and leave your sorrow.
Don't let my heartaches get into you
'Cause I'll be fine on a Sunday moon
And who knows, we might see a baboon.
But, in case we see a doe,
Please, don't say **.
Just a note.
873 · Aug 2016
One Night Stand
Kisses and secrets being shared among the shadows.
But in the morning,
we're just two naked bodies sharing an empty bed.

I **** a friend, I'm just that low.
But who cares?
We're fair.


Lovers for one night.
Strangers right after the first sunlight.
To those friends who had *** with their friends, welcome to the club.
So sad.

So much for my regrets.
745 · Oct 2016
Message in a Bottle
In a piece of paper, my hopes and wishes are written,
Every pain and love, everything I keep hidden.
Placed in a bottle of wine
Together with all the pieces of my shattered heart
I seal this bottle with my soul.
A kiss will guide it to its goal.
In the ocean, my message in the bottle goes,
Hopefully, one day, it will reach you
Maybe my essence will be able to warm your ice cold body.
May you have happiness and peace,
Then I'll be at ease.

Once again, I say my sincere apology
In a parchment, I say it all,
In your hands it may fall.
This message in the bottle that travels the ocean.
Time doesn't change how I feel, distractions didn't work. For now, I'll sing songs for you. I vow my fealty and love, now I am forever condemned.
730 · Aug 2016
God of Olympus II
Gods of Olympus
I call to you once again
Remember the little cherub?
She is dead, isn't she?
Hades, you saw her in the pit of hell
Burning, dying every single day
Just like her humanity
Slowly fading
Her love turns to anger turns to hate
Cruel Eros, he planned her death with Aphrodite
Together, they succeeded
A battle between the mind and heart.
Once again, they prove Athena and her kids can be conquered.
The Gods watch her die but still kept her body alive.
Why are you all staring at me?
I'm not her. I'm not questioning you from your actions.
I feel less emotion.
I'm an empty vessel.
A reincarnation of an angel who lost her way.
Gods guide me, for I am a new born
In the body of this dead angel, I'll inhabit.
Her body. My soul.
I would like to revise this but I'll do it later.  I need sleep.

If you were able to read SM cherub's God of Olympics, this is the second part of it. I feel sorry I deleted that account.
714 · Nov 2018
A Stupid Story
Your word kills me more than this knife pierced in my chest
I was your saviour
And you are the death of me.
Here is our story:
The beginning still plays on my head
The images are vivid and alive
You are the one that needs saving,
Lying naked on the street at a cold winter night
I was a passerby who got a glimpse of the homeless child
Our eyes met, just like that
And we became meant to be

Both wearing their birthday suits
In a home built for two
The love burning like a wildfire
As two bodies intertwine
Pushing each others limit
In every passing hour,
You go rougher each time you are inside me
And always finish before me
Leaving me craving for more every **** ******* time

What happened next was a disaster not worth telling
So, let us end it here and not open old wounds
You must go in your own way
And I on my own
An old poem that I decided to finish. Not that I really care.
665 · Apr 2017
LIFE Rumors
People talk and words fly
Here goes again, the crooked man
His face is ugly and he is a fatty,
Women laugh at him, men throw punches and stones,
Children scream and live in fear.
He is a monster for the naked eyes
Killed his own children, they say he eats them whole.
His wife is a witch and burned to hell.
Don't listen to these rumors though,
The crooked man is not a monster, the people around him are.
Just a thought about how human ruin another human's life.
629 · Sep 2019
Drum's Noise
Dum dum dum
The dreaded sound of drum comes.

My corpse is painted, full coverage of red
How can a body be alive while the soul is dead?
Words,  words are knives that aims to ****

Killing is no fun without suffering
Pleasure grows when pain last longer
Break the victim slowly
Just one at a time and don't forget to help them up
Bring them hope and see them stand up to their knees
Now, time to throw more knives until they fall
Let the crumbling hope be their last straw

Do you feel more pleasure?
Watching the hope crumbles as life disappear

In martyrdom I suffer
Yes, such idiocracy still exist
While my identity is gone
no more hope for this unknown entity
But in the same fate, you should not fall.

Dum dum dum
The dreaded sound of drum is gone.
I'd like to remind everyone that verbal abuse is real and it affects a person's mental health. Let us fight it.
601 · Aug 2016
Responses
How are you?
I'm fine, thank you.
Are you really okay?**
I'm fine as a day.

Why are you lying?
My dear, everyday I can see you dying.
And it hurts me every time
Because I know I did that crime...

Can't you forgive me?
Can't you stay with me?
You can but you won't
You say you love me but you don't.

You may treat me like dead
But always remember, I'll be your friend.

I may be an annoying *****.
But I will always care for you, my dear.
Those little white lies.
600 · Nov 2016
Midnight Playlist
Midnight and I'm finally awake in my hospital bed,
There was an accident which almost cost my life
Rushed, rush to the emergency room
A man in white cloak says "Bring another bag, replace all the loss blood in her system. "
Eyes were focused on the lightings above.
Consciousness has left the body in the hands of a stranger.
Limbs were broken but wait, there's more.
I reached for my phone to play its tunes,
Browsed chrome, and spot myself to a familiar page
Nothing fascinating, only a sentiment of a man
I read through the pages as Sam Smith sings "Lay Me Down"
Water in my eyes started to flow while the moonlight glows
Like an empty shell in the ocean, I remain still.
Days ago, I had everyone introduce themselves.
The back side of the brain was hit, but the frontal lobe was damaged badly, a contracoup.
Doctor says this won't be permanent, just a temporary amnesia.
I listened to the ramblings around, I am lost.
Attention deficit disorder makes it hard to focus
My thoughts keep on going back to the man behind those lines
Who are you?
How are we related?
I dig my mem'ries
Deeper I go each ******* day
Blank, nothing but a blank parchment
I lost it in the seven seas.
Let's try and retrieve it.
No, once gone, there's no going back.
No, don't say no.
At least let me do my best.
Such a stubborn woman.
For once, listen to what they say
You're at fault for your misery
I don't give up, I never give up.
This is just a temporary memory lost, nothing that much.
The blood started dripping again,
I stared at the stars and the moon above.
In the realm of dreams, I return.
As an old love song says **"Till the day my life is through, this I promise you. "
****, my head aches.
597 · Aug 2016
Juliet's Poison
A burning sensation is building up in my chest
I feel my heart burning as it pumps as fast as the fastest train.
My body is ready to blow and make the night glow.
This is an illness I acquired ten years ago,
I went to see the smartest doctors and not even them can let it go.
As time pass  this feeling is somehow disappearing
or so I think
When I saw you in another woman's arms, when I see you go
I feel my soul being burn in the pit of hell,
My body ready to die and my mind realize.
You are the poison which caused my illness
But you're also my cure.
I am alright now. Such lies I said to everyone but they know that I still am suffering from the pain that my first love brought.
582 · Aug 2016
Prayer
Gods i ask you
Why bring me this pain?
Am I evil or is this a payment for all humanity has done?
Gods I ask you
Why I, who does nothing but serve you, is being punish?
How come everyone is happy while I'm not?
Why are those little raindrops are in my eyes?
Gods I asked you
How come the sun never shines on me?
Why didn't you **** me on that incident?
Do you want me to suffer more?
I want to die.
I can no longer keep on living while my heart is on the darkest pit of hell.

Gods thank you!
The spring has finally come
Flowers covered the fresh earth
A much brighter and bigger star shines at night
Birds are singing song that awakens the good fairies
The dirt and blood that covers me were washed away.
I am cleansed now
The storm has finally end.
I'm free and born a new man.
I'm breaking free.
550 · Oct 2016
Restless Moron
I seek for peace
Only you can give
Forever I'll seek forgiveness
As I walk the lonely seas

I'm the one who's lost
And I'm the one who seek
Empty my soul, fill my mind
My being is at void

Peace is now just a dream
Dreaming without any sleep
Restless as I am
I must find who I am

For ten months, I've been hunt
Of the nightmares of the past
I don't know how long I will last
'Cause now I'm on the verge of dying

The light that shines upon you brings me hope.
With this hope I'll continue living, living but will remain dead.
But with you this empty vessel will be filled with its soul.
Then I shall rest in peace.
So this is what you get after listening on those empty songs.
545 · Aug 2016
Wrong Turn
Days are dark
Roads are bare
Birds and all sorts of animals are hidden.
Everyone is gone.
Hiding from the monster that I've become.
A realization has occurred to me.
This is all my fault, no one else is to be blamed.
Hahaha
This is  so funny, I can't stop my tears from flowing.
Where are you? Please come back.
I don't want this. I didn't mean to do everything I've done.
I will never throw you away.
Who am I fooling?
I don't want you back.
Stay away from me.
YOU! You who brought pain in my life should die.
I wish you happiness.
I wish you death.
Once you cross this road I will make sure that no one will ever see you again.
Today the sun will never rise.
Not a single creature could live in this hell I created.
Prepare to die if you dare step on this land.
This is mine.
Mine alone and no one else.
Based on the movie "Wrong Turn" and how I feel about everyone.
541 · Jan 2018
Untitled
Mercy the one who no longer feels
She has been through a lot
Bless her who gives to people
She has nothing for herself
Love her who loves everyone
She has always been alone.
Have pity on her.
She is tired.
Death is her only resolve now.
And there i felt something. A realization that i have a lot of friends but i am always alone.
504 · Apr 2017
Damn Night
Like whispers on the wind
He lays kisses on my body
His massive ******* between my legs
It's been like this every night
Being used by different men
Friends, strangers and foe on my bed

My blank eyes on the ceiling
His going faster and I can hear his rugged breathing
Shall I let out  a moan?
What is his name again?
I'm smiling but I feel empty
There is no emotion
Just a faux happiness.

The night is almost over
I'm lying down with an unknown cutie
More, I need more.
I want more.
To void the emptiness I feel
To stop the stabbing pain in my heart.
Do I love you?

I already forgot how it is to be ****** because you love the person and not because you need them.
500 · Jun 2017
Something Strange and New
Foams are flying everywhere
Music is just a blur
Bubbles soaked the dry land of Africa
The wolf with its magnificent fur has marked its prey
A butterfly as beautiful as the clear sky
There are much more beautiful creature in that desert
But the butterfly caught the monster's attention.

Unsuspecting with the danger that lies ahead,
allured by the wolf's gaze
Butterfly fly...not near but far from it.
Its destiny is already written.

Lured to the cave of a monstrous creature.
Draw closer, words were spoken. Closer.
Lips are now locked to each other.
But the wolf still made a promise, never will I break you.
The promise has been fulfilled, blood did not splatter on the floor.
Nothing is there.
Aside from a disappointed winged creature that can not fly
And a hungry wolf.
Parting ways.
I decided to write something about that strange encounter that I had with a new friend of mine.
473 · Jan 2018
Him
Him
He is a prince with no castle
A knight with no sword
A jester with lame jokes
He is a princess at the same time.

He cares,
He is quite but he listens,
I cry and he understand.
He wrote this poem about the sun
And it illuminates my life.

He stands up for you
That is what he is, a friend not a foe.
To my best buddy.. Belated happy birthday!!!
472 · Jan 2018
Hidden Company
Amongst the crowd, is a wolf hiding
Sympathize and sooner it will be biting,
Take a chance and you will lose it
Be extracareful my friend before you will be hit.
Standing straigth with its full magneficience
Is a criminal hiding its presence.
Criminals are just around.
464 · Aug 2016
Irony of Life
In this world full of evil and lies,
How will you know whose naughty and nice?

The beautiful ******* a wedding dress ,  who'll stay by her side till she dies?
The person who promised her forever
Has left her in the altar for another.

The man sitting in the bar with those companions he calls friends,
He asks himself: "Are they a pal? Or are they a fiend?
He hears them talking while his gone.
The harsh words penetrates his heart like it has been shot by a gun.

And these little children's enemies,
Pushing and shouting in their faces
They never stop till they hear those screams and ugly faces.
Why do they exert effort in making them smile in each cases?

I'm tired of this ****,
So tired of those red eyes
That was a result of all these lies.
Everything is so complicated
And as a result everyone is being hated.

My head is aching and my heart is breaking.
I'm tired of figuring the beauty that lies on evil from everyone.
So away from all of you is where I'll be.

Tonight I'll just rebuild my palace of ice
You can never melt it and I'll freeze everyone who tries.
I'm in a limbo, want some ice cream and fries.
461 · Oct 2016
D.R.E.A.M.S.
I dream a dream,
A dream that i always dream,
In this dream that I always dream
I dreamed about the one that I always dream,
For now I will just always dream about the one that I always dream,
For one day that one that I always dream will no longer be a part of my dream,
It will be part of my every dream and reality.
Each one of us has a dream, hope we will achieve it all.

Inspired with the dream I had the other night and tonight. :)
449 · Jan 2018
My Only LOVE
To my only LOVE
I will stop falling for you
Will hide this feeling
Because we never work out
You were my lover and my friend
I do not want to lose
Let me stand right next to you
Baby,  I am afraid to be alone and forgotten
Our *
LOVE STORY, its over.

                      
To my only LOVE
Embrace me, Push me
I ****** up a million times and so did you
I am sorry so forgive me
Let spend time together
I will pretend not to feel
I will stop falling.
I will stop loving my only LOVE.
And **YOU
are my ONLY LOVE.
My bittersweet goodbye.
445 · Dec 2017
I am a MONSTER
I am a beautiful creature in the picture
a master of my own disguise
If you'll see who I really am, you'll be running to mountain Heiss
A **** princess in the light
But prowling every night for a prey lurking in the dark.
You are the one in my sight
You should run for your life.
I am turning to a monster
Right before your eyes
A merciless killer, this is what I've become.
My fangs and claws are hidden
I'll come to you when you least expected
And I strike.
This is what I've become since the rainy night.
I am a MONSTER.
This is inspired from a song, I also wrote this recalling what I have become after people i loved hurt me.
407 · Aug 2016
Reason behind the Hurt
You are crying
because you are hurt.

  You're hurt because
You're in love.


The love you feel is true.
That's why.
Everything has a reason.
376 · Feb 2017
Meeting a Stranger
A lone figure in the moonlight, a child with a future so bright
Altered beyond recognition when fire and storm collide
Created by a chemical reaction with every change of tide
Alas! An alchemy, maybe that's what it is
But what have we in here?
Its head held high,
Wasps flies every time it says Aye!
Ready to sting every inch of thy skin
Eyes in the middle, its gaze will surely make you fiddle
Blood runs rancid on its veins
Circulating its every inch
But beneath its chest is a golden treasure that you can't even measure
A creation of Frankenstein, a monster in disguise
The child in the shadows who is ready to tell you lies
Face it with all your might or run and take your flight
Some random thoughts.
376 · Apr 2018
Horrible Time
The scene was horrid,
It is during the midday or late night
I hope my memory serves right
Prisoners are on their cell, innocents everywhere
Just one guard at bay as I tend to the babies
I heard them, I heard them right
In the swine of criminals, only one deserves death
They say.. they'll **** her
I have no evidence but believe my address
Listen before it's too late
For these people are full of hate
But who am  I? Just a child attending to your babies
That is when they ransack the place
So I cover the nearest child I see, as we all drop from the highest ground
Such a horrible night
For the same night lives were taken by million
And my blood dripping at the back of my head.

**** I wet my bed.
Just a nightmare to share.
It feels so real.
374 · Nov 2018
Human Shifters
People are shapeshifters
They change their skin from time to time
Sometimes they are preys
Lovely and faerie
Innocent lifeforms
Unlike the evil norms lurking on earth.
But mostly, they are killers.
They'll **** you upfront
They'll **** you while you're not watching
There's no catching for there is no justice
For no one notice

No one notices because they've changed their skin again.
Just a random thought.
365 · Jan 2018
The Dance
Created for a special purpose,

Be the reason of my existence

Take off your skin for a cause,

I know it is what you desire most.

In your presence, I am vulnerable

But together we will be untouchable

Feed the fire with our desires

Ignite it to burn the sky

Let our heart beat be your rhythm

Listen to the music as it slows down

And match your movement with mine

As we dance in the moonlight.
Nothing really special.. Still i feel so numb.
349 · Jul 2018
Friendzone
Heya, sending me random messages again
Ain't you cute when you smile?
It's been almost three years
Do you recall?
I met you from the other side of the world
Calling me thru Skype to hangout
You with your friends on the phone
Playing these games
You're accent awakens my sexuality
March, after the man I've gave my heart to torn it in two
You stayed by my side
Laughter from each side roars
We get naked and listened to one's desire
Confused, I asked us to stop
It's too much for me to handle
I've never been alone for you've been here with me
Months passed and you met a girl
Loved and took care of her
You've come seeking for me when she left
Constant messages with each other, keeps the fire burning
You make me smile, your words comforts me
Your videos makes me laugh
Can you hear me? My heart is so loud, screaming.
I want your *** and your love.

Don't send me this video of you being drunk.
Don't ask me why you have that *****
Don't ask me why we are just friends


Don't randomly ask me to make love with you
My feet were weak.

Do you want me or my love?
It's hard to tell.
Just writing this for I don't know how to express it to my friend. Share your thoughts?
336 · Aug 2016
Only You
Hugs and kisses,
Things I misses.
I try them with every man,
Only to find that you're the only one.
You're once a lover,
But now a stranger.
My heart still skips a beat,
Whenever I feel your heat.
I can't stop this addiction,
Despite having those premonitions.
Am I blinded with love or just a fool towards you?
I can't go on like this forever
Dreaming and wishing we'll still be together.
Days and months had past
But my feelings towards you can't be cast.
I wonder when will this last. My chest is tightening still but I must say I can smile now. I may still love that person but I'm okay now and letting him go.
317 · May 2018
Over
You're something beautiful
Something I call mine
Our bodies intertwine
But it is cold without the love
There is more that we could have.
I guess it is over
For I know you hate me
It is okay.
I’ll hate you if you did what I did
It's okay, it is over
Just got inspired while listening to a song.
316 · Mar 2019
Thank you
Thank you for being my ray of sunshine on a dark day
Thank you for being my backbone, when it feels as though I’m spineless
Thank you for being my voice of reason when I speak nonsense
Thank you for showing me that true love still exists among infidelity
Thank you for showing me that I can be strong and still show my emotions
Thank you for your care, endless support, and affection
Thank you for allowing me to be myself, and live judgement-free
Thank you for being with a hopeless romantic
and giving me the chance to be with the greatest girl I could have ever asked for
Thank you for being my girlfriend ❤️
From the sweetest man that I have ever known. He writes rap but tried poetry for the first time for me.
314 · Dec 2017
Unspoken of
A song sung by the chimes as the door closes goodbye,
I am alone again, hollow more than ever
Who would have thought that an empty heart could feel more emptier?
Am I a mistake? Did they ever really care?
What I feel is none of your business but listen.
I am screaming but none can hear.
I am dying but none can see it.
None but my demons.
Maybe it is better for me to go
Yet i want to live.
I guess I will try to write again.
302 · Dec 2018
My Life
Can you feel my heart?
It's squeezing but never breaking.
For it is not letting go of the pain
How can I complain?
I brought this to myself.
In exchange for my dreams
I sold my soul
Now, I do have no soul and no dreams.
This is my new life.
301 · Oct 2018
Message
In my mind, i already forgot about you.
But why does my chest hurts so much?
Seeing you suffer because of another woman, why don't you look at me the way you see her?
Don't you know that you're the only one I love?
After all these years, you're still everything to me.
Till now I want to hold you tight
Turn around, I want you to see me
Yes, i am not pretty but i will give you everything you want
Call me crazy but i still love you
Why is it her? Why not me?
Does she kiss you better?
Is it because of ***?
You're so unfair, you know that i can also give that to you!
You never really understand how much I love you.
How scared I am to lose you.
How miserable my life is without you.
All this time I pretend to be great but then, I am only perfect with you.
Just crazy stuff on my head.
294 · Nov 2018
Piercing Gazes
Gazes turning to arrows
Crafted and sharpened to ****
Try and avoid it but it will follow
Snap it and there will be more
Ready to tear your core.
I'm just saying.
288 · Apr 2018
Untitled
I said i am sorry but you never forgive me.
I hurt you for you banished me
Some past draft... never really had the guts to finish it.
241 · Aug 2016
Untitled
Tears is the price of the happiness you felt.
240 · Sep 2018
A PLACE I CALL HOME
Home is not a beautiful place
In the ruins, I was born
I grew up and live
My mind wanders around the world's beauty though
Never contented with what I have and where I am.
I was born a dreamer and forever I will be.
Searching for a place I can call home.
Is this where I belong?
NO
The only time I felt that I am home was at that time.
In his arms, I feel safe. I was happy.
I was contented and being greedy at the same time.
I want more of him.
After that, never have I felt at home.
Not even in this paradise, I am in.
I'm alone with no home now.
I beg you, give me shelter, give me love
I'm dying.
The truth is I just want to go back home.
I just realized that I've got no one.
199 · Sep 2018
Your Teddy
Your teddy, once your favourite toy
Now, dumped in the trash like everything else
Tattered and covered in dirt
Teddy is thinking
Did he miss me?

Your once cute teddy,
Walking in the dumpster
Looking for a way home
Poor teddy
Still hoping..

Kids throwing stones at the poor little fella
Rats gnawing its skin
But still it goes
Moving forward in your direction just to see you smile

Knock, knock!
On the front porch, he lays
You took it and take a close look
It face lit up, for at last, it is home.

In your arms it found peace
Its heart is filled with joy
For now it can see, embrace and love you
Such beauty, even angels can't compare

Ouch! A shrill of a small voice can be heard
You gashed it apart for you want your new toy and not the old fella
Poor little teddy...
Life has finally taken away from his limbs
As its shreds scattered on the ground.
I don't know..

— The End —