Hey there Delilah,
What's it like in your ******,
I'm a thousand miles away,
But girl, I smell that **** from China.
Yes, I can.
I've got a nice white mini-van,
Lemme tie them hands.

Hey there Delilah,
Don't you worry about the distance,
I will be there in a jiffy,
Give this song another listen,
I'm by your side,
I came fast and now I'll slap your thighs,
And cover your eyes.

Oh, you've got some nice tiddies.
Oh, I'll give you STD's.
Oh, I'll tie you to a tree.
Oh, I'll ******* till' you bleed.
******* till' you bleed.

Hey there Delilah,
You know my **** is getting hard,
But just believe me, girl
Someday I'll let you out of this here car,
We'll have it good,
I'll have your life, you'll have my wood,
Just like you should.

Hey there Delilah,
I've got so much **** to say,
Why write you ten thousand songs,
When I could rub your **** all day,
I'd rub it hard,
From house, to school, to pool, to plane, to yard,
I'll leave some scars.

Oh, you've got some nice tiddies.
Oh, I'll give you STD's.
Oh, I'll tie you to a tree.
Oh, I'll ******* till' you bleed.
******* till' you bleed.

I wish upon a summer star,
****** strings for my guitar,
I think that's gross so I must be gay,
My friends will all make fun of you,
Degrading lies like, "You're a Jew",
You'll try to run but I will make you stay,
Delilah, I can promise you,
That one and one always makes two,
And two people create the greatest games,
Great ***** games!

Hey there Delilah,
You be good, and don't you diss me,
Cause, you're the sub and I'm the dom,
And you will be history if you do,
You'll end up in some cannibal stew,
The liver to swallow and the skin to chew,
Doing like cannibals do,
Like cannibals do.

Oh, you've got some nice tiddies.
Oh, I'll give you STD's.
Oh, I'll tie you to a tree.
Oh, I'll ******* till' you bleed.
******* till' you bleed.

I will contemplate my boredom today, it's terrible,
I must dedicate my actions to something ethical,
So I'll go agitate all the photo chemicals,
It won't automate, it's not a technical miracle,
I will be the chaser of an adventure to set out,
To steal a stack of photo paper someone had left out,
Took it from "The Enticing Taylor", stole his photo clout,
I'm no hater but you better remember to take out,
Your **** when you are done in the dark room...

Okay... see... I really like this girl and I've liked her for a while. She's a silly type of girl that would go the extra mile for any guy that might want *** from the forest to the tile. They might seem as sweet as can be, but they turn out to be vile. There's this one stupid guy who's only nice perk was his smile. He got her pregnant last year and she's about to have a child. I guess this was bound to happen, cause she's that type of wild that would get married at 18 and then immediately file for divorce in the courts, of course this would happen. While I'm studying the art of pickup, she gets sitting on his lap and then he might decide to stick his **** up and start clappin, cause I was never able to man up and I was too scared to tap in. I guess my major hiccup was my constant state of rapping. Where has poetry ever even gotten me. Just a hobby while I'm stuck in this secluded monotony. I just hope one day I can say someone spotted me. In the meantime I'll be a lonely poet in the club of 'Forgotten Thee'.

Like ******* a **** and you can't get hard,
Like rolling a blunt that's full of glass shards,
Like a bowling stunt where the pins are yards,
Away and you must stay put loaded with gin and not on guard,
While there's jaywalkers walking cross the alley and snipers far,
Up both sides, moss covered camouflage dilly dallying,
Falling comets, planets and stars while you ***** black tar out your scars, Sick spurting **** out the pit of your face and tripped on a lace falling down along with Mars.

Faster than my **** grows when I'm hitched, race-cars, bullets, and the suicide of a suicidal emo ***** with a mullet, grab the **** and pull it off and roll it up like the glass when you rolled it in the paper faster than a rapers hips going twitch twitch twitch, ***** you know it, she's on the list.

But you're soft and no fist can fit and what the **** is this about, just **** I coughed up and spout out my mouth, if it makes sense, even a little, I am not dense with my rhymes, raps, and riddles, there's meaning to it all, whether its beaming or dull, but I guarantee it's full and fits and flows when I say it to a T, you say my **** blows, well that's just mean, you say it's great, my confidence ovulates, so use it as bait as I eat off this plate, this 5 star rated treat elevated to six star cuisine meat.

I'll continue later in few poems that are greater and like haters, I won't stop planning and plotting out **** like these lyrics, I'm a creator.

I'm shaking with fear and I want to ****,
That unicorn I see that has all my pills,
Those pills that give me all the nice thrills,
From codeine to NyQuil to Advil,
People stare at me and shake and shiver,
Pulling out a knife while my hands quiver,
Stab it into some small child's liver,
Today I'm a mailman, a death deliverer,
That child's name was Jon,
I killed him while he was mowing a lawn,
He was Mexican and trying to get paid,
I guess I had to come around and make his day,
I said, "Yeet!" as I threw the kids body,
Down into the river and then I yelled, "Gotee!",
I'll feast on the rest of the child's flesh,
Jon was a nice meal, probably the best,
I didn't find my pills in Mr. Jon the unicorn,
I guess his mom gave birth to a ***** that was born,
Without the pill portal that he should've had,
Their family is terrible, all members must be bad,
Now I don't have my pills and I've just had a meal,
I guess the kids meat was a good enough appeal.

Actually feeling like death is better,
Better than letting her borrow my sweater,
Cold but she needs the warmth more and pleasure,
Doesn’t come easy when we’re talking Heather,
Endlessly flowing love has nowhere to go,
Fire and water that will burn and will flow,
Getting pain and repose all in one blow,
How do you regulate love? no one knows,
Infidelity fills the atmosphere,
Just like how the mug and all of your beer,
Kills you over time quickly drawing you near,
Little voices, the insanity premier,
More drugs to drown the drastic discomfort,
No way you know how much I have suffered,
Open the blinds but keep emotions covered,
Painfully black and white out the colors of,
Quirky emotions that fall off the shelf,
Remind yourself that nobody can help,
So you end up understanding that the self,
Tortures you and you can’t blame anyone else,
Under pressure and stress twenty-four seven,
Violence seeping out pores till’ I’m deafened,
Woke-wise so I won’t make it to heaven,
Xenophobe so no change cause depression,
Yields surprising results in the face of,
Zipped up introverts in the place of poets.

I can tell you’re feeling nervous,
I can feel it near your ******,
But you’re fine, you’re doing perfect,
I’d like to thank you for your service,
I am seven inches deep,
And I’m hurting you on purpose,
My **** puts you to sleep,
With the excitement of a circus,
I hit the spot, you make a peep,
I think that moan of yours is perfect,
You’re a snack, I’m a treat,
Today the lust is lurking.

Dear Mama,
You would pause throughout the days amidst the drama,
And talk to me about why we should persist and what’s gonna,
Come of all of this and then climb out of the abyss to forget papa,
And reminisce in incidents of our time in home and in the old Honda.

Dear Papa,
It’s been a very, very long time without you,
A month after you were married, who knew,
You would be buried after a pew, pew, pew,
Shot twice in the upper back and once in the head,
We saw he was black as he ran off, up ahead,
Of your falling attacked body, we yelled as you bled,
Landed on the silver cracked and red stained cement.

Dear Sis,
I know we both long for and miss,
The man who’s gone for the abyss,
So, I wrote a song in honor of his bliss,
Haven’t kissed him since the coffin,
Church surrounded in a foggy mist,
Skin cracked and wrinkled, yet softened,
He will never be forgotten.

There once was a boy that felt kind of strange,
Everyone knew that this boy was deranged,
Out of his mind and that would never change,
All thoughts of success were far out of range,
But one day this boy felt a new feeling,
Something that felt like his mind was healing,
This was the first thing he found appealing,
This was love but sadly she was stealing,
The spirit that the boy couldn't get back,
He felt peace during her silent attack,
Felt stomach to stomach and chest to rack,
Then the ***** threw him out and stole a stack,
Now the boy was broke and left heartbroken,
Felt pain like never before and choking,
On tears from the heart, **** from the colon,
That is his life and that is his slogan,
He soothes the pain with drinking and smoking,
Passes the time by thinking and hoping,
That the ***** will drown in blood and soaking,
In memories of every dire moment,
She was gilded, thought she was pure golden,
Now I hope you know to never open,
Up to people because they're all just fake,
Treat you like a vampire and drive a stake,
Straight through your heart and your love they will take,
As they watch you sit in anguish and ache,
Don't fall in love if you don't want heartbreak.

Why can't I remember simple words and phrases for tests and quizzes, yet I can remember almost every conversation we have had in the last four months. I have unintentionally memorized all of your hobbies and favorites. This was a surprising, yet amazing perk to getting to know you and fall in love with you.

I wanted to be a better artist, so I posted this wish on a few social media platforms. I was just getting it out in the open thinking that nobody would respond. You responded. You told me that we could meet up some time and practice your preferred art style, which is drawing animals. We made plans and set a date. I texted you on the chosen date and got a response the next morning saying that you were sorry for not responding sooner. You didn't have internet. We tried making plans a second time and the exact same thing happened. Yet again, you didn't have internet. At this point, I just thought that you didn't want to see me and I accepted that. One day, me and my ex-friend Gavin were walking around, going from neighborhood to neighborhood, just talking about life. Reminiscing in the good memories and troubles of the past. Eventually, we got bored of talking and he suggested that we go somewhere. This somewhere was your house. I didn't realize that we were walking towards your house at the time. Once we got to your house, I noticed you sitting in the back of your fathers truck while you had a few friends inside and your entire family eating dinner together at the dinner table. You seemed like a lonely teenager. You confirmed this thought after telling me multiple times in the future that you wanted me to come over and hang out, because of that dreadful loneliness. I came over at least twice every week and that lasted for a good two and a half months. From the first glance, I noticed your beauty. From your first words, I noticed your refined charm. You gave me a sort of cancer every time I came over. Ever time you touched me, the cancer would diminish and there would only be an elegant light radiating from the both of us. Then, when I would leave, the cancer would grow and pain me. This was only the beginning of my painful, yet joyous love for you.

I fell in love with you, because you drew me in. You, at one point literally, took me by the wrist to a place that nobody would find us and showed me the love you were capable of giving. Just not being able to see you and enjoy your presence was an extreme pain. I didn't think that this pain could get any worse. But of course, I was wrong and the pain grew immensely. You found someone else to give your love to. I was old news. Onto the next. You still had a bit of human in you. There was a small part of you that didn't want me to parish. You didn't want to completely stop avoiding me. So, you just started hanging out with me before school like I wouldn't notice the decline in how much time we were spending together.

I'm not mad. I'm not even sad. These emotions want to be set free and rile up a storm, but I would rather stay numb. When you're feeling lonely and don't have your boyfriend there to eradicate the loneliness present, I will be there in a snap. When you're hungry and I have stocked snacks in my bag for Wednesdays, because I can't order school lunches on Wednesdays, because Wednesday's are half-days and everybody has the same lunch on half-days, meaning that I would have to sit down and eat in the presence of you and your boyfriend... which I'm not going to do... I'll give you my Wednesday meal because your comfort is more important than my livelihood. When I buy two hundred dollar tickets for me and my friend Gavin to see a YouTuber we really like, and I find out you like the YouTuber too, I'll tell my friend Gavin that I'm taking a girl with me and take you instead even though I told him half a year ago that he was going with me. That's why I put an 'ex-' before friend while mentioning him earlier, because in the process of doing this, he said that I was a ******* ***** and he didn't want to hang out with me anymore. I don't mind, because your smile during the concert was more than enough to light up my days for weeks after the event. When you're wanting to walk with me and you're walking slow because gym class made you sore, and I'm walking fast because I have crippling anxiety and all I want to do is get the **** out of this highly populated school... I'll slow down and walk at your pace. When Satan comes knocking at your ******* bedroom door and asks you to **** one and save one, one being me and the other being your boyfriend, I will gladly run to your house and jump on Satan's blade so you don't have to make any decisions.

No matter what the circumstance, realistic or not, I desire your happiness above everything else.

I love you...

I ran like I said I would,
Something I never thought could,
Possibly happen to someone like me,
A depressed sailor that is lost at sea,
It's mid-day, but it's so cold,
Out in this dumb tale untold,
My mom has probably called the police,
And tried to put my sisters minds at ease,
By telling them some white lie,
So they don't worry and cry,
Probably tried calling all of my friends,
Which might just cause a reaction which sends,
Their parents out to find me,
This is realistically,
The current outcome of this sad, sad day,
Maybe I am also lost in my ways,
Just like my eldest sister,
Gives two *****, but I still missed her,
When she was at the mental hospital,
Doesn't have a way to cope, like riddles,
Poems, playing music or just listening,
Acts ******, but wants to grow up and sing,
Then there is the step-brother and father,
A couple ***** I try to not bother,
With even though I have to live with them,
Living is ******* bile, mucus, and phlegm,
All mixed into one "delicious" dessert,
Continue eating but it ******* hurts,
As I'm freezing in the cold and writing,
I think I realized the lie I'm fighting,
Maybe I'm trying to see who still cares,
Mainly the girl in all of my nightmares,
I dream of her at least once every night,
Nothing scary either, never a fright,
Dreams of fairly normal activities,
No matter what it is, puts me at ease,
Because her presence is what I care for,
That's how I know it's love deep in my core,
Boiling for someone who doesn't love me,
At least that is how I've come to perceive,
The relationship between me and her,
A lovely ***** that is obsessed with fur,
Sometimes I like to see how long I can,
Go on in a poem without the mention,
Of heartbreak or the heartbreaker, Heather,
As fierce as a lion, yet a feather,
Something delicate, couldn't hurt a soul,
But could tear a heart and let em' just roll,
On with life and never mention a thing,
Like there was nothing there, like it don't sting,
I guess I failed and I mentioned her name,
I am the only person that's to blame,
I might just attempt round two tomorrow,
Meanwhile, leave me to drown in my sorrow.

There was a man that sang in rhyme,
Every time he found a dime,
But by the time that he found nine,
He’d forget how to rhyme,
Then go back in time to rhyme,
Until he found another nine.

Anxiety ******* tearing up inside of me. ***** ******* **** with some *** stained cavities and now shes coming onto me entirely. I should be like finally, but instead the anxious brain of mine avoids the blankets and gravitates towards the rhyme cause reality... what the **** is reality? My extended ****** up morality, apprehending the shortness of mortality or all these sexualities?
He, she, they, them.
See me hock phlegm.
Maybe stock them.
Lay low till' ten.
And then when,
They stop,
My pen cap,
Pops off,
Stabs lead into the head of the said ***, already wishing they were dead, but the use of a mag would cause attention, so I'm carrying a handbag full of pens. This is my pencil pushing, pen pushing straight into the gay neck, rushing to **** the wreck of a man and get paid through bills or a check again.

From my anxiety to killing gays, cause I'm willing to get lost in my ways of letting my mind wander, even though I kind of wonder why the gays were on my mind. The ***** that broke my heart was bi, but that's fine. I got nothing against you, unless you hurt me or the ones I love. You get two feet up your *** at once if you harm or speak bad about any of us.

"What a little ******* *****,
He’ll never come cross a chick,
That will wanna **** his ****,
So why the hell does he think,
My mouth gonna be his kink,
Imma let him drown and sink,
In his vast tide of loneliness,
**** his wavy-haired holiness,
Just there to steal his coziness,
Nah *****, **** the harmonious,
And **** humans, they’re odious,
Leave em’ rotting in moldiness,
Let em’ express their emotions,
And question all of their notions,
Cause they’re all losers and broken,
Why not speak, you’re all unspoken,
But let’s not cause a commotion,
Cause I think now we’re approaching,
The part where I tell you something,
When music had the bass bumping,
And mons push and our lips touching,
And to your **** blood was rushing,
I was high, think you’re disgusting,
******* *****, please become nothing."

Although the things that I said are probably not true,
I'm just seeing the worst outcome from her point of view,
Now I'm going off with my old friends and my new crew,
Starting a rap group called Dugtrio, gonna make our debut.

An hour goes by, and a raindrop falls,
I look up to the sky, while receiving no calls,
No texts from my lover, because she’s sound asleep,
So, what happens to me, I get lost in a dream…

I walk into school ten minutes after seven,
I sit down all alone and then I am beckoned,
Over to a kid who wants me to teach lessons,
Based on Japanese culture in a matter of seconds,
Cause school’s about to start and he didn’t study,
I couldn’t care less, I’m like, “Bro, I’m not your buddy.
Stop bothering me and stop trying to act funny,
Go ask your Asian sister, that *****, Mrs. Chun Lee,
She’s a smart Asian girl, so go ask her for advice,”
He just glares for a second and then he leaves my side,
I see my girl walk in the room and I’m quickly tongue-tied,
No words come out my mouth, but the mouth is open wide,
In-between inconceivable mumbles I kiss her,
But words aren’t enough to express how much I’ve missed her,
I feel so clingy wrapped around her like it’s Twister,
The guy from earlier walks by and has the ***** to diss her,
I slowly get up from my comfortable position,
Right hook to his face to remind him his decision,
Lacked any compassion and my perfect precision,
Broke his glasses in half, now in school that’s called division,
My math teacher walks by and quickly gives me an A,
The bell rings and my girl says, “I don’t wanna be late”,
I say, “But, baby… first period is our date.”
Too my surprise she takes my hand and says, “Okay”,
We walk to the dugout and find a bench to sit,
She sits on my lap and I feel her ****,
Keeps my hands warm, but not as warm as this:
She undoes her buckle and I go towards the ****,
Slipped under jeans and underneath the *******,
Feel her up everywhere, yeah, every nook and cranny,
A little bit of teasing, because that’s what she fancies,
After ******* quick, I ask if she can scan these,
Two big ***** and my six-inch ****,
She buckles her belt, gets up and checks a clock,
We got forty more minutes and now she’s looking shocked,
Cause I whipped it out fast and she eyes it like a hawk,
Cause it’s throbbing and hot and ready to be used,
I’m sitting there wide open, ready to be amused,
Like a magnet she lurches, and she’s quickly fused,
Mouth to ****, I said, “Slow down!”, but then she refused,
This girl has got it down and I’m soon to ***,
It feels so good that my mind goes dumb,
I start thrusting my hips and her eyes spun,
Back in her head and she’s choking on gum,
That’s exactly what it sounded like at least,
Until I convulsed a few times and then I ceased,
Cause I came and that **** had sprayed and then leaked,
Straight down the throat and my girl, she had shrieked,
A gurgle of a shriek, but a shriek nonetheless,
But you could see in her eyes that she had no regret,
As a matter of fact, she looked practically possessed,
Possessed with satisfaction upon my request,
We were both ready for round number two,
I pulled my pants down, she took off her shoes,
To take her pants off so I could abuse,
Her tight twitching **** with five-star reviews,
She hovered a second and slowly lowered down on,
My quickly recovered **** and then went to town on,
The **** like it was the only thing she could count on,
To bring her joy in this world, but then I turned the frown on,
Her face… well it was more of a hungry pout,
I steadied her body and told her all about,
Slow *** and its greatness, but she had doubted,
That it was that great, so she rerouted,
To rocket speed and I grabbed that ***,
I never thought that hips could move this fast,
I’ll tell you one thing though, this ******,
Could never in one thousand years ever surpass,
Any other experience, but I say that every time,
Cause *** with her is sure to be sublime,
Then after we finish, she likes to climb,
All over me while I tell her she’s mine,
Snuggles after *** is the greatest thing,
Cause you’re out of energy and just want to cling,
Closely to your partner and that’s all during,
The cooing and protecting and the safely securing,
Of my baby in my arms, it’s just the greatest,
Right after this happened, school was canceled,
I had to make sure my baby was happily handled,
I took her out to a movie and candlelit dinner,
At the end of the day I felt like a winner,
Her parents invited me over to spend the night,
I happily accepted with surprised delight,
They sent us too her room to get out of their hair,
And at this point, I was finally aware,
I was sadly dreaming, and my baby was still in France,
This figment of my imagination can’t get in my pants,
Sadly, I woke up misconstrued a few minutes later,
And thought to myself, definitely one of the greater,
Dreams I had in the past few nights,
Most of my dreams have been full of frights,
Nightmares come more often than not,
Now I had dreamt of my baby, I had got,
A taste of whatever was soon to come,
I laid back down, this time feeling numb,
Missing my baby with all of my heart,
Felt like I was being pulled apart,
Piece by piece with a small pair of plyers,
Fell asleep again and had a dream of a fire,
The fire burned everything including my baby,
This was a normal dream, the dreams that I hated,
I woke up quickly in an irritated sweat,
Got out of my bed which was soaking wet,
With sweat and *** and tears and drool,
I was unmotivated and out of fuel,
I walked to the closest road I could find,
Sadly, my mental health rapidly declined,
A car came at me and I thought it would stop,
But I was hit and dead without a second thought,
After this happened, I woke up again,
I was twenty-three years old. I swiftly sprung out of my sheets and studied my surroundings. I was in quite the stunning house and in the bed I had leapt out of, lay my silent sleeping sunshine, the love of my life, Mia. Now I had to ask the significant questions… am I still in a dream? In this specific reality, is Mia my girlfriend, wife, or perhaps a close friend that happened to stop by and passed out in my bed? And the most important question of them all… where did the poetry format go?

Frightful ******* aching feeling,
Fleetly filling till' it's full,
Soon to smack the central ceiling,
When she pushes, then I will pull,
Pull her right back into my arms,
That is right where she's meant to be,
Metaphorically, so no harm,
Will ever come to her or me,
Avoidance will heal,
Getting closer helps,
Avoidance will hurt,
Getting closer pains,
Duality exists,
And life persists,
Always a good side and a bad side,
And life goes, so live, I insist.

Do not try to force out rhymes you cannot make,
Deplorable bars oftentimes makes me ache,
If you have nothing to talk about then keep your mouth shut,
Leave open mouths to the poets and the *****,
Your words are a disgrace to poets everywhere,
I read your new "poem" and saw you in my nightmares,
Visualized a grotesque brace face in a wheelchair,
Not only your verses, but your looks give a scare,
Don't think you created magic and will be big tomorrow,
That would be tragic considering what you will undergo,
A world of pain realizing you're nothing more than,
A miniature grain of Sahara Desert sand,
That doesn't and won't ever stand out in the slightest,
I'm burning you everywhere, I'm the sun, ***** I'm the brightest,
I will leave now but I will be back in the morning,
You better leave without a bow, this is your last warning.

I'm constantly checking Snapchat and Instagram, and instantly decoding your posts like a cryptogram. In a millisecond my brain goes from using a gig of ram, to oozing out ten petabytes, like *******.
It won't slow down and I'm trying to stay chill, so I gotta down another bottle of pills. This also helps with the hunger that I'm trying to fill, going from starved, to full, to just feeling ill.
Nauseating dizzying feeling and I'm flustered, populating my stomach with crackers dipped in mustard, I don't like food, but I've started to wonder why my ribs hurt, might be the undying hunger.
I can't pull my eyes away from it as I slit upon my thighs and think of a beautiful ***** I'll never get, so I get lost in distractions to forget her. I've come to accept that this is the truth as I accept the cold and give her my sweater. Attempted controlled suicide at a park plus the letter. If she goes in for anything then I guess I will let her. But every time she touches me it lights a fuse that only activates when she's not around, only clutches me closely when there's nobody else in the vicinity inbound making me feel deader.

I was used as a temporary coping device.
I am trying not to be ignored, but also trying not to be seen as clingy.
I will continue feeling pain without changing anything and just see what happens.

Hey, it’s been a while, nice to see yuh,
I didn’t think that due time I’d have to greet yuh,
It’s been three years, 2 months, and a day,
Now I’m feeling speechless and I don’t know what to say,
You came around the corner so ******* fast,
An immediate blow to the head and blast to the ***,
I wish you didn’t have the ***** to come back around,
I’d lost you for a while, but now you’ve been found,
Found under the influence, influenced underground,
Away from the police, so I pop at least a pound,
Of fentanyl, morphine, ******, and coke,
I mean, “Please don’t come for me, this is all a joke”,
If they ask if I want some, I always say nope,
Deadliest drug I ever did was dope,
I didn’t even use the **** **** to cope,
I hated the feeling and hated the smoke,
I used the stuff to sit a socialize,
And I despised my girl smoking with other guys,
I am selfish and constantly jealous,
She would be confused, sit me down and say “Tell us...”,
“Tell us why it pains you to see me this way”,
I said, “Girl, it’s destroying your lungs every day”,
So I stopped using and she kept going,
With guys and girls with or without knowing,
If she is safe and indoors or scared and outside,
Either way I’m worrying with fears like the tide,
Not as intense during day, but insane during night,
I was manipulative and stupid one day,
I asked her choose between smoking and me,
She made me cry and chose the ****,
So now I’m stuck up high in a tree,
Contemplating suicide and for some reason you’re here,
Meeting me again and telling all my fears,
That I’m a ***** and I dont deserve,
This life and it’s glory, man, you have the nerve,
That I had to ask the stupid question,
That ended it all and let’s not even mention,
That she was attracted to every other guy,
And said it was normal and constantly lied,
Depression is back, that is your name, right?,
Been a while old friend, I don’t think I’ll fight,
I’ll let you take over once again,
I think you and I could be pretty good friends.

Losing you would be the end of me.
I couldn’t deal with that atrocity.
Sometimes I think you don’t understand, so I must find a way to reprimand.
I close myself off.
Anxiety fills me.
I ain’t making laws, but you think that these bills be controlling you.
Manipulation.
But I just want a simple stipulation.
An understanding of the sorts.
So I don’t have to feel this pain.
You’ll stop other painful activities when I ask.
But when it comes to smoking, I’m the one to blame.

These feelings,
I know them,
I’ve felt them before.
I was reeling,
In feelings,
I felt from a *****.
But now I’ve moved on,
That’s all in the past.
She’s out of my life, she’s gone,
I knew that **** wouldn’t last.

Then why, I ask,
Do I feel this way?
Towards the girl I love,
The girl that loves me.
I sit and I think,
About the feelings and thoughts,
That seem to come about,
When it seems I’ve forgot,
That she really cares,
Like nobody before,
Much more than Heather,
That stupid-*** *****.

Let’s think a second here,
She smokes and drinks beer,
Along with these habits,
Comes unending fear,
That she likes other addiction,
More than our love,
More than our friction,
Cause when push comes to shove,
I’ll let her shove me,
Right down the stairs,
Before I create some part of her,
That will need repairs,
Years and years from now,
If she ever left,
If she ever up and,
Stole my heart out my chest,
And ran and ran,
Blood spewing and spraying,
Like love was a game,
That is just meant for playing.

And she talks to this guy,
A past sugar daddy,
He thinks that he’s sly,
With Britney and Maddie,
And Courtney and Tia,
In all corners of the world,
He’s got girls that will be a,
Nice ***** for him,
And he likes my baby,
And she says she misses him,
So maybe... just maybe,
If she goes to Canada,
And decides to meet him,
They’ll get in a situation,
Where she decides to treat him...

I know this will never happen,
But there will always be the fear,
That one of us will **** up,
So I worry the end is near.
Soon I’ll gain trust,
This won’t last forever,
But, until then,
Trust issues I’ll sever,
I’ll cut them all off,
One by one,
Because feeling this feeling,
Is anything but fun.

You are so cute,
No matter what,
From head to toes,
To ***** to ****.

You are the little,
I’m the caregiver,
Just ask for anything,
And I will deliver.

You are so pretty,
Every single day,
Please take my hand,
And I’ll show you the way,
To a happier place,
Just you and me,
No matter where we’re at,
From land to sea,
I’ll be there for you,
And try my best,
I want nothing more,
Than your happiness,
I love my lovely little girl,
My everything, my entire world,
I love you, I love you, I love you so much,
To this terrible life, you’ve become my crutch,
I’ll try to learn to stand without you,
A dependent strong man I’ll be,
The future, together will be seen through,
Together, soon we’ll move in and marry,
And have a nice life with a house and money,
Always and forever, through crying and funny,
Things that we’ll do like eat each others chins,
And share our past stories onto our kin,
But before all that,
I have something to say,
Please hear me out,
This will probably sound gay,
A lovers gay,
The cheesy type,
That makes me want,
To maybe write,
A poem for you,
On our 92nd day,
Here I go,
What I was going to say:

Is that you are the sub,
And I am the dom,
Do me the honors,
Of letting me take you to prom.

I understand pain can be found worldwide,
And pain can teach us things in life that can be applied,
To love and relationships alongside,
The fact that she has me feeling like Mr. Brightside,
What's the lesson I'm supposed to learn here,
To be strong, secure, solid, stable, and preserver,
I would rather trash feelings and disappear,
Getting right up and out of this putrid atmosphere,
Kiss me when you're high, love me when you're sober,
Reject me when you're sober, then crap, it's all over,
I can't portray reality like Donald Glover,
And I can't make you feel better in this month of October,
Getting with you would be like finding a four-leaf clover,
But I'll continue writing until I get a lot older.

Saw them holding hands the other day,
So, I tried to stay away,
If I got close they would see my sadness,
But last week she was on my mattress,
This is why I'm so confused,
Either way she is amused,
She's between my sheets,
Then he's between her legs,
Anger continues to increase,
So, stay out of my bed,
Or don't do what I say,
Just keep clinging to him when he's around,
Then cling to me,
When I'm the only one inbound,
Don't stop the fake love you're spilling out,
If you don't want to,
You'll break more men, the dishonest and devout,
But don't be surprised if out the blue,
Some man breaks your heart and cheats on you,
It'll be something that you can't construe,
But if you come back to me I'll say, "Who knew? ",
Do what you must, and I'll go along with it,
Drink your alcohol and give your **** another hit,
I'm trying not to care,
Trying to take my feelings and smother it,
But now I'm done,
Although I could go on forever,
Once the ramblings begun,
I couldn't be more clever,
How do I end this,
Obviously not with a kiss,
Or an I miss,
Although I really do,
And I'm feeling blue,
I guess this is my cue,
I'm out...

I would rather have a panic attack in the dark room than be alone at home in my own zone depressed on my phone. Then staying up an insomniac, at the park, rising gloom, falling rain, feeling pain, like it's all I ever known.
Attempted suicide, but then revived, choking phlegm, thought I died, I was there, in the hospital, bare naked riddled with needles, poked and prodded, dead skin rotted, almost cried, but I fought it.
Now I knew, I had to go home, and to school, to ******* and moaning and drama, and talking, and floating back to normal society, choking on tears in sobriety, kind of wish I stayed dead cause she gives me glee, ignore what I just said and don't pitty me, as I escape again to a place you flee, when the lit fuse of my bomb rapidly, rushes towards the end, she's gone and done it again, she's wrong and loving other men, I'm right here and paying amends, for **** that I never did, all I ever wanted was to please a kid, with a rotten heart, that was full of sin, I hope the goal was never to win, in this game of life, strife ridden knife stuck on skin.
What doesn't make sense is how she makes me so happy, cause I'm dense headed every time she calls me pappy, or *** or says, "I Love You", it was two months of a misconstrued, confusing relationship thing, now two months without it and it ******* stings and aches when I'm not around her, I want to love her, I want to ground her, ram her, straight into the floor or wall so maybe she can feel my pain, bash her head in a door and make her choke on a wedding ring, while I smoke **** out her mouth like toking while she's bleeding from the throat down to the feet and... in this verse I just finished a talk and I understand that I've been gawking nonsense all along and she isn't with me because she doesn't want to hurt me, but sticks by me because she really likes me.
I feel fine now because I've put the puzzle pieces together and I've calmed down now cause I think I understand Heather.
That's what I'll tell myself as life goes on, living in the prison cell of pain and beyond.

Love you the slightest? Love you off the scales!!! Feeling like nukes dropping and trains derailed. Like pill popping and **** inhaled. Like time stopping and towers scaled. Like the whopping beauty being all unveiled. Super intense like fifty different drugs being shoved down the throat all at once. Super serene like a beautiful view on an oceans shore, classic music on cue. Super insane, like who in their right mind would fall for a guy with half a brain devoted to **** that seems basic and plain and cant ******* flirt without a bottle of champagne and the other brains half is going through pain  and my current life path has me in the wrong lane and I cant go through anything that causes major change, cause I'm a xenophobic ***** that likes to complain. Yeah, sure, everybody's got problems. Yeah, sure, there's always a way to solve em'. Yeah, sure, I look like a hobo druggy. But **** yes, I'm hella ******* lucky! I'll continue to love you off the scales while I'm slowly spilling out my entrails through lyrical stunts and poetic rhymes. I'll continue this until the end of time. <3 <3 <3

I'm basically a poet that likes to read fast,
I won't perform it unless I'm formally asked,
I'm finally devoted to the universal cast,
I could leave if I was promoted but that would come last.

I have allowed her,
To take my underwear and shirt,
Nine days without her,
And now it really ******* hurts,
Pride has been swallowed,
My feelings have all been destroyed,
Now I feel hollow,
My heart is simply just a void,
A dark empty space,
Only one way to recover,
I must see her face,
Her soft lips I’ll rediscover,
Slow kissing a while,
As essence is being restored,
Pull back, see her smile,
Now the essence is in the core,
I can feel again,
She has given me back my soul,
She’s the only one,
That can make me quickly feel whole,
I will reach for her,
She will reach for me,
We will be happy,
For eternity,
She’s my other half,
She would say that is gay,
I’m gay for this girl,
Forever and Always,

I should be sleeping, but my heart is being squeezed by something unknown. It can't be conceived. It has to do with my girl, I couldn't live without her. I'm the clam, shes the pearl. Open the mouth and I'm prouder. I show her off to the world, cause she's such a beauty. I'm scared she will leave me cause it's not in her duty to stand by me forever and cherish my name. But I'll cherish hers forever, whether Mia or Aim. I'll never stop the love, it will keep pouring out. Out of my heart and my mind and my soul and my route is the route that leads to her state of content. Yes, take my worn shirts if you really want the scent. Take my heart while you're at it, baby it's yours. Drain all the essence from my glowing core. You are all mine and I am all yours. I won't stop caring for the one I adore. I want you to be happy and left satisfied. I want you to have fun and soon be my bride. I'm rambling now and I dont think I'll stop making poems out of love and setting you atop all things that may try and stand in our way. Have a goodnight and tomorrow, good day. I miss your head on my chest as we fell asleep. I felt your breath on my neck and you listened to the beat of my heart that constantly yearns for your presence. I'm a stupid buzzkill that is constantly jealous. So I'm lucky as **** to have someone like you. I'm not by your side, so what the **** do I do? I sit and write poems until I fall asleep. I've tried warm milk and music. I've tried counting sheep. Sure, now I'm alone in my cold empty bed. But soon I'll have the grace of my chest under your head. Please dont give my heart back, cause it's not for borrow. I love you, baby girl. I'll see you tomorrow. I'll remove the vice that's been squeezing. His name has been fright. I love you, I love you! <3 <3 <3 And with that, my love, goodnight.

Learned to live in despair, with no repairs, to the massive tear in my heart, replacement parts used up on fascist dipshits sifting through **** and sniffing farts, playing a game of blood and crypts and ****** body parts flung out into the black market and loaded into carts for a nice stack and that carcass that sold for a fine price never made it very far.

Almost two months through our story line. Today is day number forty-nine. Since the beginning, you've proven more benign than any past girl that was stuck in my mind. You're careful with my heart. You won't drop and shatter it. Sure, this is just the start. But, that doesn't matter. It will go smoothly for the rest of eternity, On the road of love, I will drive carefully. And so will your captain on your trip to Paris and Venice. ****, that's tremendous. We won't focus on the past and we won't focus on the premise. Our future seems bright so I guess I should let us part for a while, while you're on your trip. Make sure not to stumble onto some Frenchmans ****. I know you value loyalty, and so do I. I promise to take care of myself and stay alive, as long as you are taking care of yourself, cause daddy won't be there to help you excel, and he will get sad, but he knows you'll come back. Every day that you're gone is yet another crack in my heart, but it's fine. You'll come back in eight or nine days and I'll write for you every day, putting my appreciation on display, Don't forget me while you're lost in your fun, This is the first day of poems and now I'm done...

You are back.
               back in our city.
               back in my time zone.
                             my beautiful baby.
          Soon to be my own again.
          Soon to be in my arms again.
          Soon, her and I, and nobody else.
                                   I won’t have to share her.
Her body will be mine.
                  Will she enjoy our time?
                           She will!
                                   Will I?
               Of course I will.             And I shall take every  course  of action to make sure she enjoys herself.
She will.
     I will.
     I will be in heaven.
                         Heaven will be on earth.
                          I hope I will see her soon.        That is my only hope.
      Without my hope, my lover, my everything, I am sure to go insane.
    How can I tell?
   Is it what I can feel?  
     Or what I can’t?
                       Can’t you see it?
                    I think you can...
                    I am losing all control...
                    I am going insane...
                    I am.

I have come to the simple conclusion,
That everything is for naught,
Cause there's an inevitable intrusion,
Of death that is soon to be brought,
So emotions will be covered,
Beneath the look of a poker face,
Close the doors and close the shutters,
And remain in my secluded space,
I'm in love with a furry *****,
That I will never get to have,
I'll just ponder games and glitches,
And ignore the heart that has halved,
It has been a year and I made some friends,
From bed to school to school to bed,
I have lived through my persona and trends,
Of pretending and playing dead,
My new best friend that I thought I trusted,
Was caught making out with the girl, he got busted,
That furry ***** that once I had lusted over,
Now that makes two nasty *******, I'm disgusted,
I pushed myself away from friends,
And pulled myself towards planning their death,
I will figure out how to make amends,
Once they've both taken their final breath.

Can't think about hanging out with friends,
When I'm with them and bonds can not mend,
I have to pretend everything is fine,
If they ask me how I am, I have to lie,
A broken heart is too hard to explain,
A feeling, not a word, nothing that plain,
I feel the force of a tsunami and all you see is rain,
Now I must draw blood, because I'm feeling this kind of pain.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

One will cut to feel something that is real,
And intense because you leave me in suspense,
When I can't feel you and I don't know what to do,
And I'm having withdraws, *****, get a ******* clue,
You can't just subdue a man and make him love you,
Then throw him away and go on to someone new,
But I guess you are allowed to do you, that's true,
So give me your fever, inject me with the flue.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

You make me sick to my stomach,
And I really wish I wasn't,
Stuck in this hormonal mindset,
I haven't found my way out yet,
I can't go to sleep anymore,
When I'm thinking about a *****,
That has swept me off my feet,
And let me fall on my back,
Only feel her heat when she's,
Launching a full blown attack.

You are the only thing that crosses my mind,
But hey, that's fine.
I'll play in the pain and use a laugh and a smile,
But only for a while.

I end these off with an I love you,
Or there's nothing I wouldn't do,
But now I'm done with that stuff,
I'm ending this abrupt because I've had enough.

I can't wait for winter break,
Too much work and my brain aches,
Could just stop that's all it takes,
But I'm doing this for their sake,
Learn things for tests no mistakes,
Relate fingers to great lakes,
Superior till' I break,
To Michigan that's the stakes,
Get her on to take the cake,
Ontario has the steak,
More eerie than poison snakes,
To remember words and shapes,
That's what's done rewind the tapes.

Find a word,
Of inward,
Origin and
Ordaining,
Hidden meaning,
He imagined,
A land of peace,
Of cleaned,
Out souls,
So lust,
Is gone,
Ego sin,
No more,
Omen.

Please, just go very far away,
And remember you create the pain,
In spite of your elating presence,
No, you don't make me feel pleasant,
Full of good memories from the past,
Untold tales that never did last,
Lying in yore while I hurt in the present aghast.

Love:
          I found a person that I can't describe,
          I think she is perfect, she is my type,
          Never too somber and never too daft,
          She will talk and laugh and design and craft,
          Beautiful art all winter and summer,
          She understands pain and gives me comfort,
          Recently I've thought, "This can't be real life.",
          This is too good to be true, somethings not right.
Hate:
          I was correct, it's too good to be true,
          I can see past her beauty and UwU,
          And **** it all, she just acts like she cares,
          Now she is part of all of my nightmares,
          Does she want me or not, I'm so confused,
          I want to end it all, this is abuse,
          Mental abuse that I'll never forget,
          I hate her and wish that we never met.
Insanity:
___________NO__­
_________I1I1111111I_
_YU111­U___KILL111111111YOU1
_Y?1KILL111111NO_­DIE1DIE11111111I1NO
NOT1I1111111111¶¶1_US1¶¶¶1111111­111111¶¶¶
GA1YUI1111111111111¶¶_¶¶¶1¶¶¶¶1111111111111¶
­NOUI1111111111111111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶11¶111111111111¶
11NO111111111­11111111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶111111111111TO
STOP1111111111111111¶¶¶¶_­1ME11111111111111TO
STOP11111111111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶_1I1YOU11111111­111111I1
ME1I1111111111111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶1111111111111TO
ME11­111111111111111111111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶1111111111DIE
1NO11111111111111­1111¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶11111111111I1
BITCH11111111111111111FAG­¶¶¶1111111111111I1
NAHBI111111111111¶1¶¶¶_1¶¶111¶111111­1I11I1
1FUCKI11111111111¶¶¶¶111¶¶¶¶111111111I11DIE
­GHAAA1111111111111KILL1IKILLYOU11I11TO_
_PLEASED­IE11111111111I111IDIE111I1DIE__
_QUICKLY11111111­1111IDIE111DIE1__
__1KILLME11111111TOSTOP111­¶¶___
___STOPBEAT1111111DIE11TO1__­
____1BEAT1111YOU1HATE___
___­BREATH1DIEIT1I____
______I1DIE­1DIE_____
_______11I__­_

A
Big
Complication:
Dealing
Emotions
For
Great
Heaps
Inasmuch
Jea­lousy
Kicks
Low
Medially
Now
Over
Passion
Quickly
Running
Strands­
Triggering
Unexpected
Voices
X-Ray
Yields
Zest

Yet another day I can't go outside,
The walls closing in, my tears like the tide,
Plotting during day, crying during night,
How much longer must I put up this fight?
I must find a way to escape his wrath,
Marriage was obviously the wrong path,
During day work or during his night bath,
I'll sprint out the house, but I must run fast.
-       -       -       -       -       -       -       -       -       -
The door squeaked as I quickly closed the door,
Key in ignition, the engine did roar,
Quick prayer to God, then pressed pedal to floor,
This evil mans wrath I shall feel no more,
I realized I had nowhere to go,
As I drove in silence, through the thick snow,
I decided to turn around and drove,
To the only place I ever did know.

Hearing sirens and sad music,
The worlds gone and I'm acoustic,
I live for the amusement,
Of getting picked then I refuse it,
Cause I'm the master of my own domain,
Cause I chose to ride on this ****** up train,
Which puts all of these messed up thoughts in my brain,
For you it's called life, for me it's called fame.

She smokes **** and she gets high. It hurts me and I don’t know why. I hate when she brings the **** to her mouth, when she throws her head back and her mood goes south, and she starts coughing hard and her eyes roll back.
The brain goes dumb and the smoke starts to attack her lungs and she already has a breathing problem and sleep apnea and smoking doesn’t solve em’. Doesn’t make em’ better. Just makes em’ worse, like my stupid-*** worries in every single verse. It’s like a curse that won’t end because she won’t stop, even though it hurts me and makes my heart drop into my stomach and crush the butterflies that we’re nesting and formed colonies enshrouded in her lies about using marijuana and she knows how much it hurts. So I retaliate and stop giving her my shirts. I stop being so clingy and I see her less and less, until I’m comfortable enough telling her not to undress, because I’m not that ***** and now I just feel sad almost every single day. If not, then I’m mad. This used to be a love parade where I would jump into her arms, but now this feels unhealthy and I think I’ve lost my charm. I think I’m not okay and I think she feels the same. She’s busy with her drugs and I guess I’m busy being lame, cause I don’t participate in illegal activity, so I’m a buzzkill with an abnormal affinity for a high school teenager, which is being healthy and staying out of danger. My trust seems to be the only thing that I’ll wager. I won’t stop loving her no matter how bad the pain gets. I might just need to ignore the unending thought mess, brain *****, **** yes, rid of it, I can’t take it, I’m done with this **** and I’m done with her baking it. I’m hating it and disliking her at this rate and my mind has trouble analyzing an ongoing debate whether or not I should leave her or stay by her side. My choice is a choice that will rise the tides and turn the tables. The tides of loneliness and tables of fables that are partially true, but basically biased. Breaking up with her would cause the highest form of tension that I’ve ever known. She would fall to the dirt and I’d vacate my thrown. I couldn’t give up the only love I’ve ever known. I couldn’t leave the intimacy, the whisper, the moan. I couldn’t leave the love that she shows me when she’s around, but I could leave the pain she gives me when she’s not inbound. It’s easier to love her when she’s by my side and I can hold her close and I can tell her she’s mine. She loves that noise and so do I. I’m ending this now. I need to go cry.