It wasn't funny,
I'd used every spare sock.

Every newspaper that had past my letter box..

I couldn't use my ******* magazine
           as the pages had mysteriously



stuck together??

So I walked like a crab
         into my back garden..

My hose pipe connected,

I know how Sylvester Stallone felt
            In demolition man,
            three sea shells..

              F##k this S##t,
but no morality machine
for spare sheets....

F#########ck....

Ok lets get the water pressure just right,

I turn it on and my ***** swing like a pendulum.
               dam that made my eyes water..

This time I put it in the right place,
a unique sensation,
                but just as I was clean,

my back porch light turned on..

All I heard was,

"Frank don't worry its cold,

As he laughed out loud.

I walked back in my ***** sore,
                                   but **** fresh clean,

even though embarrassed..

We were none the wiser, I shopped the stalls,
for bread, for father was treating us to a
                                                                ­­          luxury.

He'd been offered overtime, and we didn't have it
      very often. But he knew we were down, and hungry.

Feeling the earth move, the gods were either hungry,
                                       like our empty stomachs.
Or they were punishing us for not giving enough praise
                                             for there gestures of kindness..

We heard the rumbling of Vesuvius, like an empty belly
                                                       rumbling for worth.

Then we heard the screams, as the mountain spat its
anger towards us, we had no where to run.

To hide from the mountains anger was futile.
             We huddled together,

praying to our gods


for salvation..

But our plea's  were unheard,
   had we put our faith in the wrong god!!!


Hearing the dark snow fall like pebbles and then the
                      ash of concealment.

Suffocating in our prays, we huddled tighter than
             life's last breath... and then we
            were like statues
frozen in a moment of futility...

A once flourishing moment, buried in times
                   concealment.

We were found, shells of our former selves,
                  huddled in eternity a love.

Fossilised in a last moment,
           telling the future we died together,

a moment of love shown through the ages...

To see truth
     we must always wear clear glasses.


For ones that block  out certain truths,


             don't let us see


the truth in the shade.

My room is empty except a
                     pillow...

But I drown in the feathers
             that carry me
   to illusions of flying


but I fall every time.

I wasn't like a bird, my
  wings were decapitated  
                 hard every time


I slept alone..
  

there was no one in my nest I
                was alone..

I thought I was warm,
    but in a nest of thorns I bleed
  slowly...

I drowned in my own loneliness..

My nest was a tomb of never flown dreams...

We show the fatigue of Twelve hours
       of duty, to care for those that
Cant even breath without our care..

When we leave those that we wish
could survive till our next shift.

We go to grocery stores to find
             our next meal,
but shelfs stripped clean...

By those who don't need,
but horde more than there need,
                          for either greed or profit.
                                                      We weep,
for we are holding our hands out like Oliver!!

        Sir, Madam do you have anymore,
As we weep with empty stomachs..
      making do with the scraps left behind..

            "Sorry not till our next delivery,

                             But ill be at work then..
A tear drops lonely down a cheek.  

             Yes I've seen eBay, or online selling sites...

They make me sick to my heart,
        to think I may have to save these gluttons
on an empty stomach.

But I don't judge
              I just drop a tear for those I lost the
night before.

I tried,
               they tried
              but this venom, sinks in fast..

I wear the scars on my face, the masks digging in,
                   the cracked skin that I don't have time
to moisturise as I know its been a twelve hour shift.

                                                       I only sleep a few,
     my moments of peace and tranquillity woken
early...
        My beeper goes off, were on call..

At least I got more than most,
           I give myself a two minute stretch,
  
and a wake up call, then I'm in fresh gear,
          sanitise my hands, and put gloves on.

I'm fearful of this virus, as many have fell like
warriors on the battle field, now breathing through
                                masks of life and death.

But my vow of care is strong and I shake off
              this fear, and walk into the ward a warrior
of positively.

"I will care for the fallen,
           I will hold a fearful hand,

never will I let anyone go.

But I'm only one in a sea of many.

If I can keep on breathing till they have strength

             its a win..

I'm more of a ******...

            than a nymphomaniac

on **** hub...

you ****... but not as good as a

                             tongue piercing..

And then I smile as I bleed..

               no pleasure with out pain...

I want the kiss,


                      but the venom

you craved, dam I'm addictive...

And when we French kissed it wasn't

            the beauty you wanted..

But the thrill of the poison passing

thorough the movements of your exhilaration...

I died every time you kissed me..

but when your palms touched

                  upon my face...

I was revived...

Your my sarcophagus of resurrection..

And every time I open my eyes,

I say


               "I love you now more then my last breath,

I walked the street,

               I was the lottery,

and when you span the wheel


you were a winner...

Jackpot, you got all the chambers..


And I wept..

Your rhymes were a bin bag thrown
in the trash, couldn't even write a
         sentence, dyslexia of meaning


and ****** up sentences that
    weren't even spelt write.

Couldn't even spin a line,
   as it was meant to be straight


but your words were more wavy than
                a bad perm.



  There isn't room for a failed wanna be,

                    alone in your room *******
hard,

But your more empty than the raisin
                   ***** your trying to spit out of...

Non consequential wording that doesn't flow
down stream,
                   more like your floating bloated
breath  releasing putrid gas

that stinks more than what they were belching out.


I never insult the cadavers of dead lines,

but your words were buried even before
          you opened that hurse of dead beats.

a handful of rhymes that were more powerful than
           your buried career,

sorry you were a foot in the grave even before you
                                                   opened your mouth.


Song I wrote after I used your girl..


I wasn't the one she wanted it was you,
                but I gave her what she wanted

and that never included you..

Every thing you wanted I stole,
  and gave her fake wishes that were
tarnished but she never looked beyond
                 the moment seeing the stitching
of us was more fake than the smiles I gave her.

I knew she wanted to be with you,
   but I was the salesman of woman..

While you were the boy next door, I was the salesmen
                     showing her fake dreams..

Don't worry you can have her after I've used her enough,
          I'll even trade her in for a good price..

Ye, she'll be broken..

           But everything is always defective
after I've rode it enough...

Her crown maybe cracked,
  but she'll be yours even though she'll be thinking
of me even though your in her, I'm the length
        she'll remember but she'll be your crack queen.

Now this is enough of wording.

                   and I'm moving on to the next one.

You said I was the only step,
       but you always took one


back..

Never walking us forward,
   excuses, like I had to tie my laces,
         or my feet ache you walk on.

But I never looked back,
and you never moved forward.

We were a distance apart but I'd only
                  took one more step than
you.

But one can equal more when its
not synchronized with your heart.

The next day, you had walked off,
  we weren't even walking in the same
                                              postcode...

I took of the shoes I wore when we walked,
                and now I'm bare foot.


But you know what I'm walking further without


you.

My perception isn't clouded by your backward
        footing.

I'm free to walk without the pleasure
           of having to look backwards..

Just walking onward  without pausing to see
                           who cares how far my footsteps

have wondered,.

I'm strolling at my own pace
                                  passing with no goodbyes.

I drowned in the cushions  because you
weren't there to help me float above the
                                         sleepless twilight..

But while I was dragged beneath the waves
of quilted ecstasy, I was motionless...
           I was smothered beyond the grasp
of your touch.

I missed you on the opposite side of this
      boat of slumber, but without you
It rocked in the rough seas  
                                         of lonely nights.

I can still feel the breeze of your perfume
on the sheets
                   I sail on every night..


You were the anchor of my dreams,

         and now I drown every nightfall.

Without you,
it doesn't feel right to
          sleep in an ocean meant for two..


But now I drown in this bed,
                         suffocating  on cushions,

         drowning in this quilt of loneliness.

It started with a cough,
  a thousand little teardrops
hung about the air...

then one fell upon another
      and the story doesn't end

there...

For a cough fell upon another,
and another didn't wash his hands.
Then one became more until
a city was on lockdown..

But the world isn't big when we
can descend upon the many lands.
But manners some do not have
     to cover there mouth to wash

now ***** hands..

So now the world is coughing
       finding it hard to breath.
But some never took another
and now there friends and family

weep..

So we have a choice, to stay in.
           to keep ourselves safe.
but not only us, but the
  department of health
and others don't you see.

Who are we fighting for,
                   not just you and me.
For the elderly and those of
   ill health.
For we must be vigilant.
Yes we may get cabin fever,
but its better than being

   dead, don't you see..

Never think your next breath
is free,
   for you may unintentionally

drown upon it...

Life, were swimming in an

                  ocean...

But were all starting to drown in it...

be hopeful your next breath isn't your last...

Woeful of loss we bow our heads for the fighters
  who lost the battle, tears are shed for the memories
                               of those who knew them.

But alas can not say goodbye but from afar.  
                               We honour the fallen,

though we did not know them,
             we feel sorrow for all who knew them.


And hands to heart,
                              we say are sorrows


for there may be many more to come...

Every member of our family
              is a spark that keeps


the flame of hope alive..

Never blow out the chance

to know those far away.


Because  they could be the spark


that keeps us lit on our darkest night..


Family is all that keeps the obscurity at bay..


                 even though we don't realise it


                                                           there the little spark,
that keeps us from sinking into the darkest of places..

She blossoms every morning,
    Though she

may wither slightly

                      though the harsh
Breezes of  the daily life.

She still is a flower
     Of impeachable beauty.

Though the day may wilt her.

She is the fragrance,
     That will never fade.

And I will gaze upon
     Her for eternity


For she is my blossom
   In the garden of life.

Though we are separated, we will always be connected

If love is a chemical imbalance, I'll always be dizzy for you

A simple Hi, can be more powerful than silence to someone.

The ideology of hate, is uneducated minds.

Life is A butterfly
       With its
wings torn asunder.  

For when your time
     Comes, and it will.

There will be no flight,
   No beauty.
Just your last breath
         Torn asunder.

Don't follow
       .selur eht

Just bend them
    In your favour.

It's more fun..

I was talking to
       Myself..

Then made a mistake,

   It wasnt me,
       It was the other guy.

A raised eyebrow later..
         Okkkkk.........

Walking on your every breath,
          can I taste you upon I...

On the promenade of your
                                            words.
          It's a long walk,
but I take every step slowly.

As I'm the only one here  
                               listening to
                     what you say to I.

                      I've spoken to you,
but its like my breath is a ghost
of falseness,
and you either
               don't want to see or ignore I.

How can it be that I wonder
        upon you,
yet I'm not worth the stride to see
           what my words mean to I.

We need not heed to the jest of a wanting,
          for if it needs your praise,
then it is guilty of denial.

And embellish  on your need
to need, for it to have
                   its authority over you.


You are humanity.

What is beauty,
    if not bereavement
                    of exhalation.

Our symbiosis is just
elongated moments
   of perpetual pain,

and unending noise.

And when were void less,
         there is elegance
where our conclusion is

             peaceful silence.

Cradled by there eyes
as they convulsed me
                  in to oblivion,

with every downfall I was
closer to
              nihility.

Pools of crimson collected in
   my fractured sockets and
my tears
                       drowned within.


They mourned my silence,
       inscribing one last syllable
upon my stomach...
As blood flourished forward from
                                  my dead lips.

Droplets were like rain descending,
as I painted the surrounding
                                           with death.
They were covered also,
for they were close to the cradle
                          when it fell silent.

I kissed each one with claret,
     my mark was upon there façade.

Wild flowers drank upon me,
       seeding them with my last breath.
Where beauty once flourished,
Now blushed roses grow.

I'm a garden of remembrance
to what was,
                    what never shall be.

But my death has sweet aromas to it,
       for all one at a time came to see
What had befallen me.
              Guilt, remorse or curiosity..

To hide a truth, others may fall upon.

But where they expected death,
                                     they saw,
a sight of maroon beauty.

"Curiosity is a  live wire in water,
            with a please read note floating
above it.

           "*You know there going to read it,

And with that, they picked a rose pricking
there finger upon my vengeance.
I could ******* aura that I kissed upon
there last actions
                             so long ago.

There was no scream, just like you can't hear
             a tree fall in a silent forest.

I now feed upon them, for there all here, in
my garden of eternity rotting slowly..
   But there still alive under the surface..
my thorns negating there vocals.

       I'm there cradle and I'm rocking it,
                                      oh so slowly...

People often ask,

       "why am I an atheist,

  Did you not read the book..

                     And I answer,

you have just given the
                                 resolution  
for which you seek the answer to.

I put all religious texts in library
in the over
   eighteen fiction section.

For who would let a child ponder
           on the dualities of moral
discomfort, and the lessons of
  what ponders beneath the page.

For the lessons are a contagion on
      young minds. These books
choose the morals of an age bygone.

These books have been a disease on
the morality of humanity. yet they are
         fiction a duality of horror and beauty.

But lest we forget that the horrors within
should not be shackled on a mind young.

   So that is why I put those religious books
           in the over eighteen section..
In every library I visit,

              am I wrong or right...

               You decide....

I departed
with every occasion  passing.

        But I lived for the moments


yet to come.

I thought you were my
                       lemonade stand.

But with every sip,
   I knew that you were

bitter upon my every taste..

And I asked for my dollar back.

You told me,
  

that with every lemon there
                is always pips.

but that every taste is different.

Midnight claustrophobia dreams,
                           where the charcoal
suffocation presses on my chest.

My expiration has no date of
                elapsing.

But the animation of my expiration
            still lingers,
and I hold on to that moment.

You are my collection of recollection,
            and in the onyx covering
  that the luminosity clings too,


we suffocate on every


                  exhalation of the other.

Petals do fall
corrupted they descend,
acid teardrops decline.
The day after is nevermore,
yesterday never existed.
The sun will never sheen,
the night has fallen, nightmares ecstasy.

There will never be happiness
            without

sadness.

Like there will never be a rainbow,
   before the

                               rain fell..

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

We see the youngens, they little bait,
but once we hooked them,they'll be
piranha's in our tank, stripping the
dignity from out of your
                        voice in 20 seconds flat.  

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

We strung up your boys, gasping for air.
But once we got our hooks on you
                               were gutting you easy.
But not before we get what we need from
                                                     your pleads.

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

Look little fish you in a tank of sharks,
we grin our grills gravestones of  what you
                   see last before your dispatched.  
But don't you worry there are plenty to keep
you company down there, you ain't the first
                             and you ain't going to be the last.

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

We got nicknamed the fisherman, we sail into
your town catching what ever we want.
        We don't scrap the sea floor hoping
for a catch. We fish for the real deal.
  Disillusioned of the fish bowl they swimming in.

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

Making it even easier to catch, to turn them from
                neighbourhood trash to one of our sharks.
showing other that once we got you hooked,
the only way you leaving is dead floating at the
bottom of the tank.

                We coming to your postcode.

We got your crew like you were an
easy catch, cos once we got our
hooks in your postcode we ain't
                                              letting go, fact.

You cant keep a boat afloat,

                                      without
someone getting wet.

Woeful of degenertaive
        Misgivings..

I walk the streets looking
       For mister right.


Then I hear Neanderthal
      Callings....

"All right darling,

Fancy some meat in between
        Then bones....

I look upon there fingers,

   Looking for a rope of shame.

I smile, I play nice..


    Pulling them into an Alleyway,

        I asking them,
          does your wife mind.

What she doesn't know
    Won't hurt her...


"Maybe not her but you,

As bolt croppers loose his finger
    From his palm..


Screams were to ensue,
   But gagged by lace *******..

Shoved deep within
   his dry throats...

Did you know gold rolls
   when its not weighted down
  

by the fidelity of indiscretions.

He'll not be using that finger on
        another's crying tears...

They came up with a name for me?
    I was honoured,

The guillotine of divorce..


I giggled as the amount of rings
          that rolled decreased..

Finding those who were single just
         looking for a night of fantasy.

Ok, some never learnt,

                       my box of collectables...
so many little lies in my box..

I saved my ladies a lifetime of lies,
    and I have a reminder that some men
                             are worthless...
  

but some are just out for a some fun,
         just like me....

You were petroleum.

rhymes polluting the world..

          They were more deceased
than what your mouth ran off,

with your pollutive words..


              Clogging up others lungs.
    
You thought you were a driving force,

but you were a traffic jam...
    clogging up others lungs with
your stagnant rhymes,

              oh,  
you just stalled one more time..

But I'm rechargeable, neve missing
             a mile, while you ran out of
class about five miles back..

Your more extinct than the crude words
                                      you run off..
Dam I'm on the roadside choking on your exhaust.

But when I'm going, I'll never be polluting my
       rhyme, every breath is fresh.

And your extinct like what you run off..

What if I hadn't answered that
  Wrong number.
Heard your voice calling on
   The other end.  
Two people a worlds apart,
     But a once in a life time
        

                                 Error.


I said wrong number,
   But my heart was wrapped
Around your voice that captured
In the moment between me


   Putting the phone down

                                  and redialing my destiny.


I paused and I said,
     "Hi,


  Awkward silences lasts a lifetime,

Till you answered me,
                   "I said I heard you on the other end
and I just wanted to
    know who's voice could capture me

with so few words..

She said my name is,
        and I said my name was,
  we giggled and I wondered how far


could a destiny have called from.


And we realised that even though
our voices had connected

that we were just five floors apart
        for us to for so long ourselves
five years never meeting eyes,
            voices, not even a glance.

But I'd now found you,
       we rushed from our doorways,

down the stairways..


We reached the floors we were meant to
        reach, but you weren't there,
I wasn't with within your reach.

We stared out the opposite windows,
and found we were further apart than
we'd thought I saw you, seeing me.
            Waving at each other.

We didn't run we walked,
          down each flight of stairs.

Waiting so long for each other we walked
miles in tandem till we reached the
                                                            sidewalk.

What are the odds to meet this near
  on a crossing of life.
We waited a moment till red turned green.
That was our moment
                             to collapse in to each other,

and it seemed like we kissed for our last two lifetimes.

The best sight at a sunset is you,
     I'll never let the sun drop below us.

I'll hold up the day just to see you.
      Because observing your beauty is
the rising and falling of my life.


Your on the first rays of daylight
                    and I'd  never let it set on



you & me...

What if i
         Was..


But you missed
     The call.

And we missed our connection.


   We would be the

Answer phone messages of silences.

Let me be
     The soup,

That dampens
       Your croutons.

Well they knew it was coming,
                        But didn't do a thing,
building in secret, not many knew..

Two by two of species some
   Well known but 40 days
And 40 nights some never
Made it home..

As the waters rose,
And land was swolllowed.
A mother with a child.

"Please take my children,
  "They have not sinned,

"Nothing done against this God.

Noah looked and walked away..

As his children went to help,
                Stay your pity.
The mother is sin so then is
   The child..

A *******
         as out of wedlock born.

Cries lasted for hours,
        Then swallowed like

The land.

"Father why didn't we even
       Save one,

Noah answered

"They angered our father,
   Thinking they didn't need
        His love,

The children confused,

"But if they grew out of
     The cradle shouldn't a
        Father be proud

As self sufficient..

Noah agnerly replied..

"We will always need him,
    He is our father, mother, child.

To deny him is sin untold,
  So he cleaned the slate.

And we his children were
    Saved for we obey,
   His word is just.


As the dove came back,
   Land was fruitful once more

And on the shoreline a child
Face down..

But Noah didn't flinch,
    Walking past he said to
His family,
                    God is good..

Genocide was his gift,
    And not all the animals
That attended found this
                     New home.

There bones discarded
    On the ocean floor.
Two by two they deserted
   This prison ship.

And so Noah and his family
    Repopulated the earth..

Now for the mindful  just
       Think deeply on that.

We ponder outside,
                        where luminosity is dulled,

but no matter the dullness.

                  The beauty  of our view isn't stagnated.