Some songs have no name written October 19th, 2020
I come back to the same theme of pain and the past manifesting in my present.
I have tried ignoring them. I have tried fighting them. I have sought therapists and seers who teach me new ways to battle, but what I fight and avoid just seems to get stronger.
Forgive they say. I WILL NOT say it was ok tell you to go peacefully to your death with no stain on your conscience.
I try accepting living with the demons and memories the hurt and betrayal where there should have been safety and comfort.
Will I die an old lady one day still crying and hiding? Will I find a peace of my own? Can origami cranes and butterflies fill my skies?
This poem has sat in my notebook for months. I keep wanting to make it something else. The last line came from a conversation with someone about the goals of writing. I struggle with speaking these things, or erasing everything except for the last 2 lines. Erasing the first part, erases a kay part of my reality, but I don't know what the resolution will be, and so the ending feels unfinished and rushed.
How to feed a cat How to hack, self How to dance cerebrally How to stay more silent How to memorize, what needs to How to forget, what most How to stay busy, productive And yes How to feed black dog And a white dog And a brown dog And a mouse A red mouse A brown mouse And likes
Genre: Abstract Theme: Stay learning Author's Note: Do anything what calms your soul. Don't waste time over temporary calm
I am Casting down imaginations To the pulling down of., strong-holds Gearing up for the., long term But from the outside looking in? May seem bold or quite MAD ( Well ) Just referring to the thoughts that I have that are really not that far off while dreaming of., REVELATION No fabrication on my part As I try to separate the Light from the Dark with high hopes and Aspirations Which is.. a sen-sational sensation of flying high.. being.. elevated High on Elevation Or something like a planned Evo-lu-tion that is so True Staying true to my elevation in 2020 leading into 2020 one Now seeing Double Vision Here to fix it? Well., I would beg to differ Cause it takes.. Twice.. the listen Care to listen? Just to see things Different And at the same time? Shuning the carnal mind's version of seeing Double Vision May call it.. Twinning Which is the true definition of being Double Minded So to combat this? I just never Mind it ( meaning ) There's no rules or bars of Confinement For no 20 or Eye is missing from my INTUITION Raised suspicions? Well., Just hoping that you will tread.. carefully And stay Centered As you enter my center of words and.. penning As I write the vision I'll make it plain and simple No Subliminals Or either I'll keep it at minimal While maintaining the Visuals As usual As I keep on gaining in WISDOM
On the New Year's Eve, As the clock hits midnight and marks the new beginning - The show begins In a flash, the night sky gets lit on fire, Fiery flowers hissing and fizzing, their crackle and boom steal the silence, and in the midst of this frenzy; I begin to ponder that with each passing year, we are racing towards - our destiny, so I look back and question myself to contemplate the mistakes I made, the promises I break, the unrealistic goals - I set, and in this moment I know why many of us (when entering into the new year) misses the mark just like the kids who were shooting rockets - in the dark...