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clmathew May 30
Some songs have no name
written October 19th, 2020

I come back to the same theme
of pain and the past
manifesting in my present.

I have tried ignoring them.
I have tried fighting them.
I have sought therapists and seers
who teach me new ways to battle,
but what I fight and avoid
just seems to get stronger.

Forgive they say.
I  WILL  NOT
say it was ok
tell you to go peacefully to your death
with no stain on your conscience.


I try accepting
living with the demons and memories
the hurt and betrayal
where there should have been safety and comfort.

Will I die an old lady one day
still crying and hiding?
Will I find a peace of my own?
Can origami cranes and butterflies
fill my skies?
This poem has sat in my notebook for months. I keep wanting to make it something else. The last line came from a conversation with someone about the goals of writing. I struggle with speaking these things, or erasing everything except for the last 2 lines. Erasing the first part, erases a kay part of my reality, but I don't know what the resolution will be, and so the ending feels unfinished and rushed.
Grey Jan 19
It wasn’t “I love you”
but at least it was goodbye.
1/19/2021
Things to learn

How to feed a cat
How to hack, self
How to dance cerebrally
How to stay more silent
How to memorize, what needs to
How to forget, what most
How to stay busy, productive
And yes
How to feed black dog
And a white dog
And a brown dog
And a mouse
A red mouse
A brown mouse
And likes

It goes
Genre: Abstract
Theme: Stay learning
Author's Note: Do anything what calms your soul. Don't waste time over temporary calm
David Jan 3
Maybe I just forgot to make them
Or perhaps its the lack of interest

But this year

No new years resolutions.

I’ve tried all year
To change the person I am

But last year

I didn’t change

So what makes people think,
That I’ll change this year?
Ah, I know why they think I’ll change!
It’s because expectations exceed reality.
I am
Casting down imaginations
To the pulling down of., strong-holds
Gearing up for the., long term
But from the outside looking in?
May seem bold
or  quite
MAD
( Well )
Just referring to the thoughts
that I have
that are really not that far off
while dreaming of.,  REVELATION
No fabrication on my part
As I try to separate the Light
from the Dark
with high hopes and
Aspirations
Which is.. a sen-sational sensation of flying high.. being.. elevated
High on  Elevation
Or something like a planned
Evo-lu-tion that is so
True
Staying true to my elevation in 2020
leading into 2020 one
Now seeing  Double
Vision
Here to fix it?
Well., I would beg to differ
Cause it takes.. Twice.. the listen
Care to listen?
Just to see things
Different
And at the same time?
Shuning the carnal mind's version
of seeing  Double
Vision
May call it.. Twinning
Which is the true definition
of being  Double
Minded
So to combat this?
I just never
Mind it ( meaning )
There's no rules or
bars of
Confinement
For no 20 or Eye is missing
from my
INTUITION
Raised suspicions?
Well., Just hoping that you will
tread.. carefully
And stay
Centered
As you enter my center of words
and.. penning
As I write the vision
I'll make it plain and simple
No Subliminals
Or either I'll keep it at minimal
While maintaining the
Visuals
As usual
As I keep on gaining in
WISDOM
Do not follow your heart follow God
Good morning.
Lean into the good,
even if a hangover fug
has you in its grasp,
breathe deep.

We still have grey days
to argue with, some tears,
til greenery ensues
when lost, hidden and new truths will return.

So make the morning good,
with toast and jam
or salt, fat and shenanigans.

And for your soul,
despite the impotent bitterness
of prevailing winds,
prop open the door a little.
Hammad Dec 2020
On the New Year's Eve,
As the clock hits midnight
and marks the new beginning
- The show begins
In a flash,
the night sky
gets lit on fire,
Fiery flowers hissing and fizzing,
their crackle and boom
steal the silence,
and in the midst of this frenzy;
I begin to ponder
that with each passing year,
we are racing towards - our destiny,
so I look back
and question myself
to contemplate
the mistakes I made,
the promises I break,
the unrealistic goals - I set,
and in this moment
I know why many of us
(when entering into the new year)
misses the mark
just like the kids who were
shooting rockets - in the dark...
Steven Dec 2020
let me not dwell on things i lost, forgot.
who gains from memories of memories fought?
ce-walalang Nov 2020
...i resolve to tune out
...write more
...nap more

...i resolve to embrace confusion
...keep discovering
...keep listening

...i resolve to be more self-aware
...refuse to act my age
...say less no and more yes

...but let my yes be yes and my no be no
for new year's
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