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Jan 2017 · 561
Sad song
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
Razor blade razor blade
Let's sing a song
Let's erase the pain
Even though it's wrong

I'll press you. Against my skin
And wait for blood to come
My eyes full with tears
The ***** deed is done

The pain is gone
Even if it's only for now
As I smile to myself
And take a little bow

Razor blade razor blade
We sang our song
And now your time is done
Was it really that wrong
Jan 2017 · 737
Today I feel..
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
Abandoned
Ugly
Hurt
Like I don't matter
Useless
Invisible
Like I don't belong
Not worthy of love
Jan 2017 · 1.9k
I am...
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
The fat friend
The ugly sister
The dumb classmate
The second choice
That depressed girl
The hated child
The *****
The ugly duckling
The girl that will
never be good enough..
Jan 2017 · 1.5k
How do I feel?
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
I feel alone. I can't let any people in, I will only get hurt. I feel scared. Not only of people and places, but myself too. What if I lose control? I feel guilty. It's all my fault I'm like this, I just cant seem to change myself.

But how is it that I feel all these feelings, and still feel nothing?
Jan 2017 · 421
Missing
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
I don't know what I feel anymore. One minute I'm happy, the next minute sad. One day I hate him the next, I miss him. My feelings are everywhere. I can't control them. But this time it's true. This time I know. The darkness lingering inside of me tells me, I do truly miss him, I do want him back. But the emptiness has came and is unbearable. He is gone and I cannot control it. For I was to selfish to see before that I was the luckiest girl ever. But that is gone and I am unsure that I will ever get it back.

Do I deserve it back? Do I deserve to have him? I wish, but I a doubt in my mind that he will ever forgive me fully for the mistakes I've made. Life will go on, dark, empty, hopeless. I wish it could get better. I wish I could see light At the end of the tunnel but I just don't see it.
Jan 2017 · 4.3k
Untitled
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
I used to fear depression. Now I look in the mirror and want to smash it into pieces. I put on fake smiles, I have no confidence, no one likes me, I hate this place. Now I know why I feared it.
Jan 2017 · 353
Not Winning
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
Every thought is a battle,
Every breathe is a war,
And I don't think
I'm winning anymore.
Jan 2017 · 1.4k
save me
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
Save me. I am trapped. Inside my head.. No one to talk to, no one to help me escape.. Help me, free me, save me. I need out, now. Please I need out, I need an escape. I will go insane. Save me from drama, school, life, myself.
Jan 2017 · 1.2k
Untitled
Erin Nicole Jan 2017
The loneliest people are the kindest, The saddest people smile the brightest, the most damaged people are the weirdest... all because they don't wish to see anyone else suffer the same as they did.
Dec 2016 · 1.9k
The A Team
Erin Nicole Dec 2016
White Lips,
Pale Face,
Breathing in Snowflakes..
Ed Sheeran ~ The A Team ~ Great Song!! Melts me every time.
Nov 2016 · 703
Complicated
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Uh huh, life's like this
Uh huh, uh huh, that's the way it is
'Cause life's like this
Uh huh, uh huh that's the way it is

Chill out, what you yellin' for?
Lay back, it's all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see
I like you the way you are
When we're drivin' in your car
And you're talking to me one on one
But you've become...

Somebody else 'round everyone else
You're watching your back like you can't relax
You're tryin' to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this
You, you fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get and you turn it into honesty
You promised me I'm never gonna find you fake it
No, no, no

You come over unannounced
Dressed up like you're somethin' else
Where you are ain't where it's at
You see you're making me laugh out
When you strike your pose
Take off all your preppy clothes
You know you're not fooling anyone
When you've become...

Somebody else 'round everyone else
You're watchin' your back like you can't relax
You're tryin' to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this
You, you fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get and you turn it into honesty
You promised me I'm never gonna find you fake it
No, no, no

No, no, no
No, no, no
No, no, no

Chill out, what you yellin' for?
Lay back, it's all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see...

Somebody else 'round everyone else
You're watching your back like you can't relax
You're trying to be cool,
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this
You, you fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get and you turn it into honesty
You promised me I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no

Why do you have to go and make things so complicated? (yeah, yeah)
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this
You, you fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get and you turn it into honesty
You promised me I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no
My story right here.
Nov 2016 · 759
When Your Gone
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side

[Pre-chorus:]
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

[Chorus:]
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you,
I love the things that you do

[Pre-chorus]

[Chorus]

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do, I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe, I need to feel you here with me, yeah

[Chorus:]
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
When Your Gone by Avril Lavigne
Nov 2016 · 1.0k
Because of You
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face, it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
All of me... All of me... All..

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you
true for me...

Because of you by Kelly Clarkson
Nov 2016 · 438
My Immortal
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face, it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
All of me... All of me... All..
AMAZING SONG!!!!!!!!!! My Immortal by Evanescence
Nov 2016 · 886
Bring Me To Life
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb
Without a soul my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)
Bring me to life

Frozen inside without your touch
Without your love, darling
Only you are the life among the dead
All this time I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
Got to open my eyes to everything
Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul
Don't let me die here
There must be something more
Bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can't wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
Call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
Bid my blood to run
(I can't wake up)
Before I come undone
(Save me)
Save me from the nothing I've become

Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)
Bring me to life
Always loved this song. Bring Me To Life by Evanescence
Nov 2016 · 1.6k
Terrible Things
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
By the time I was your age, I'd give anything
To fall in love truly, was all I could think
That's when I met your mother, the girl of my dreams
The most beautiful woman, that I'd ever seen

She said, "Boy can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I can't help but notice, you're staring at me.
I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe,
I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me."

Now, son, I'm only telling you this
Because life can do terrible things.

Now, most of the time we'd have too much to drink
And we'd laugh at the stars and we'd share everything
Too young to notice, and too dumb to care
Love was a story that couldn't compare.

I said, "Girl, can I tell you a wonderful thing?
I made you a present with paper and string.
Open with care now, I'm asking you, please.
You know that I love you, will you marry me?"

Now, son, I'm only telling you this
Because life can do terrible things
You'll learn, one day, I'll hope and I'll pray,
That God shows you differently.

She said, "Boy can I tell you a terrible thing?
It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks.
Please, don't be sad now, I really believe,
You were the greatest thing that ever happened to me."

Slow, so slow I fell to the ground on my knees.

So don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose
If you're given the choice, then I beg you to choose
To walk away, walk away, don't let her get you.
I can't bear to see the same happen to you.

Now, son, I'm only telling you this
Because life can do terrible things
Good sad song. Terrible Things by Mayday Parade
Nov 2016 · 434
Erin Nicole
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Here are ten good things about myself..okay...? this is ANDY'S CHALLENGE!!
1. I care about others
2. I love to help others
3. I have faith and hope
4. I try and be truthful
5. I put others before me
6. I try to do be a good person and do the right thing
7. I put trust in people
8.(I guess) I'm smart
9. I have pretty hair
10. I don't give up (easy)
these are as good as there gonna get with me. just saying.
Nov 2016 · 656
Bub
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Bub
Years ago we sat there in the church.. talking away. You were the only one that got me. The only one that understood my life. You are my old friend. Best friend. Brother. Bub, I miss you so much! I can't wait 9 years. I can't wait till I am 23. I would do anything for you. When I have the money I will call you! When I am 18 I will come see you! There is no one on earth that could hold me back from seeing and talking to you. My parents don't like the fact your in my life and they don't like you. But ***** it. ***** them. I am done and nothing can stop me now.
To my loyal and trusting brother Richard Allen Lima.
Nov 2016 · 6.5k
Scars To Your Beautiful
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
She just wants to be beautiful
She goes unnoticed, she knows no limits,
She craves attention, she praises an image,
She prays to be sculpted by the sculptor
Oh she don't see the light that's shining
Deeper than the eyes can find it
Maybe we have made her blind
So she tries to cover up her pain, and cut her woes away
'Cause covergirls don't cry after their face is made

But there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
Oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful

She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving
You know, "Covergirls eat nothing."
She says, "Beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything."
"What's a little bit of hunger?"
"I could go a little while longer," she fades away
She don't see her perfect, she don't understand she's worth it
Or that beauty goes deeper than the surface
Ah oh, ah ah oh,
So to all the girls that's hurting
Let me be your mirror, help you see a little bit clearer
The light that shines within

There's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful

No better you than the you that you are
(no better you than the you that you are)
No better life than the life we're living
(no better life than the life we're living)
No better time for your shine, you're a star
(no better time for your shine, you're a star)
Oh, you're beautiful, oh, you're beautiful

There's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
Whoa-oh-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh
And you don't have to change a thing
The world could change its heart
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful
This is truly my song rn. Scars To Your Beautiful by Alessia Cara
Nov 2016 · 56.1k
I Love You More
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
When I say I love you more, I don't mean I love you more than you love me. I mean I love you more than the bad days ahead of us, I love you more than any fight we will ever have. I love you more than any obstacle that could come between us. I love you the most.
Nov 2016 · 399
Check this out..
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Check out my new Website..
https://sites.google.com/site/erinnlehman/
Nov 2016 · 3.0k
Diamonds
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Diamonds, pearls, gimme that gucci
Theres more important things why we trip pin bout some loui
Then i hear the kids screaming with no food to go to school with
When i hear them bells ringing i just think we so clueless
We degrade each other, we degrade ourselves
We never read the books, we just knock em´ off the shelves
Judging by they covers, don't believe in nothing else
Coz a person ain´t **** if they win´t high up on that wealth
Right, wrong
We straying from the purpose, we disrespect each other
And the people that have birthed us
We hatin on our loved ones
And loving who have hurt us
We forget about what means the most
And dwell on what we purchase
Forget all of that it´s not worth it
And stop thinking you gotta be perfect
We all different, we all shine like diamonds
Sometimes you gotta dig deep just so you can find them
Listen to my voice, put the blade down
I know you think that´s you only true escape now
Them scars on your arms ain´t worth the pain now
And them screams that were silent have regained they main sound
If they don´t love you for who you are that´s their issue
When you lying dead on the floor could they fix you?
When you on the news you really think that they´d miss you?
They pretend like they care, turn around and forget you
And all the racism truly makes me sick
We hating on each other cuz the skin we born with?
We take from each other, stab and **** one another
Stereotype a person cuz they white or a brother
I'm confused
We ****** up like the drugs we use
We go killin motherfuckes just for upgraded shoes
I´m a tad disappointed in this new generation
I done grew up in the jungle i´m just tryna find my way in
Really, i´m just tryna find a exit
I'm running to the end but its like a maze with no direction
Im passing every corner nd I'm feeling disconnected
Its like hate is a disease and I'm the only one not infected
So god, let em´ not disregard, that the beauty outside reflects from one good heart, and it don´t matter where you came from, it don't matter where you start
We gone make it to the finish line together not apart
Together not apart
It don't matter where you came from, it don't matter where you start we gone make it to the finish together not apart
Together not apart
Great rap by Clariyah

TRUTH HURTS.
Nov 2016 · 2.8k
To My Parents
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I'm sorry mom and dad I know I've messed up bad, I should've, should've done, should've done better.
I'm sorry mom and dad for all the time I had to get my life, to get my life together, but I didn't

1993 you gave birth to me, sweet little baby girl had the world at my feet, before I could even stand.
Cradled me in your right and your left hand a precious bundle of un-made plans.
Hopes and dreams of bigger things, a bright future so it seemed
But that light grew a little less bright as I grew up we began to fight.
When I was 13 I was so **** mean, running away had nothing more to say then I hate you.
But that's not true now
I just don't, I just don't, I just don't know how to say;

I'm sorry mom and dad I know I've messed up bad, I should've, should've done, should've done better.
I'm sorry mom and dad for all the time I had to get my life, to get my life together, but I didn't

You never talk about me to your friends
Because you must be so embarrassed
I dropped out of college without any plans; I moved back home I couldn't even pay rent.
I was living on your couch trying to figure it out, cutting myself up, tearing myself down.

I'm sorry mom and dad I know I've messed up bad, I should've, should've done, should've done better
I'm sorry mom and dad for all the time I had to get my life, to get my life together, but I didn't

I'm sorry that I couldn't buy you that house upon that hill
Or take care of all your medical bills
I know I didn't make you proud; I should've been someone by now but I never figured out how
I'm sorry that I couldn't buy you that house upon that hill
Or take care of all your medical bills
I know I didn't make you proud; I should've been someone by now but I never figured out how

I'm sorry mom and dad I know I've messed up bad, I should've, should've done, should've done better.
I'm sorry mom and dad for all the time I had to get my life, to get my life together...

I'm sorry mom and dad I know I've messed up bad, I should've, should've done, should've done better.
I'm sorry mom and dad for all the time I had to get my life, to get my life together, but I didn't

Sincerely, Your Daughter
love this song.
By Anna Clendening
Nov 2016 · 674
Love and Loss
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
The sharp stinging of the pain. The pain of heartbreak, loneliness, and loss. I mourn the death of you, my friend. I shall be brave as you were. I shall not shed tears of sadness but tears of joy. You are in a far better place than even imaginable. You may have gone, with the wind on an autumn day but my love for you will never leave, never parish. For me and you have a bond that shall be forever unbroken. This my friend is a bittersweet blend of love and loss. For my love for you will never be lost.
Nov 2016 · 2.4k
Her Last Words
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Just an average girl
She always wore a smile
She was cheerful and happy for a short while
Now she's older, things are getting colder
Life's not what she thought, she wished someone had told her
She told you she was down, you let it slip by
So from then on she kept it on the inside
She told herself she was alright
But she was telling white lies
Can't you tell? Look at her dull eyes
Tried to stop herself from crying almost every night
But she knew there was no chance of feeling alright
Summer came by, all she wore was long sleeves
'Cause those cuts on her wrists were bleeding through you see
She knew she was depressed, didn't want to admit it
Didn't think she fit it, everyone seemed to miss it
She carried on like a soldier with a battle wound
Bleeding out from every cut her body consumed
She had no friends at school, all alone she sat
And if someone were to notice she would blame the cat
But those cuts on her wrist, they were no mistake
But no one cared enough to save her from this self hate
Things were going down, never really up
And here she is now stuck in this stupid rut
She knew exactly what she had to do next
Just stand on that chair and tie the rope around her neck
She wrote a letter with her hand shaking wild
"Look at me now, are you proud of your precious child?"
But she knew that her parents weren't the ones to blame
It was the world that should bow down its head in shame
She stood up on the chair and looked out at the moon
Just don't think, it'll all be over soon
The chair fell down as she took her final breath
It's all over, all gone, now she's greeting death
Her Mum walks in, she falls down to the floor
And now nothing can take back what she just saw
The little girl that she raised is just hanging there
Her body's pale and her face is violently bare
She sees the note and unfolds it with care
All she does is stare, "How can this be fair?"
She starts reading as the tears roll down her face
"I'm sorry Mom but this world is just not my place
I've tried for so long to fix this and fit in
I've come to realize this world's full of sin
There's nothing for me here, I'm just a waste of space
I've got no reason to stay here with this awful race
It's a disgrace, I was misplaced
Born in the wrong time, and in the wrong place
It's OK though, 'cause you'll see me soon
You'll know when your time has come, just look at the moon
As it shines bright, throughout the night
And remember everyone's facing their own fight
But I can't deal with the pain, I'm not a fighter
You'll make it through the night, just hug your pillow tighter
So let the world know, that I died in vain
Because the world around me, is the one to blame
And I know in a year, you'll forget I'm gone
'Cause I'm not really something to be dwelled on
That's what they used to tell me, all those kids at school
So I'm going by the law majority rules
My presence on this earth is not needed any longer
And if anything, I hope this makes you stronger
You're the best friend, that I ever had
Such a shame I had to make you so very sad
But just remember that you meant everything to me
And to my heart, you're the only one that held the key
Now it's time to go, I'm running out of space to write
And yes I lost my fight, but please just hold on tight
I'm watching over you, from the clouds above
And sending down the purest and whitest dove
To watch over you, and be my helpful eye
So this is it, world, goodbye."
Nov 2016 · 624
Thoughts..
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
My thoughts put me into a deep slumber sending me deeper and deeper into the woods of thinking. The thoughts flood my mind, the thoughts of good and evil. The thoughts of you over power the evil, the good takes over and I smile in the deep sleep. I love you, I want you by me, you are life, you are love. You save me.
You awake me from that deep sleep. Every good thought is you. Wishing you were by me, Fearing that I will lose you, how I have never known love till you, how I will always be there no matter what, how I will never do anything that will risk my life again, and so much more.
As my mind explodes with thoughts of the most amazing person person, my world brightens, the thoughts of you flooding thru.
I love you with all my heart, to the moon and back.
Nov 2016 · 1.8k
I Will Trust In You
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Letting go of every single dream
I lay each one down at Your feet
Every moment of my wandering
Never changes what You see
I’ve tried to win this war I confess
My hands are weary I need Your rest
Mighty Warrior, King of the fight
No matter what I face, You’re by my side
When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!
Truth is, You know what tomorrow brings
There’s not a day ahead You have not seen
So, in all things be my life and breath
I want what You want Lord and nothing less
When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!
You are my strength and comfort
You are my steady hand
You are my firm foundation; the rock on which I stand
Your ways are always higher
Your plans are always good
There’s not a place where I’ll go, You’ve not already stood
When You don’t move the mountains I’m needing You to move
When You don’t part the waters I wish I could walk through
When You don’t give the answers as I cry out to You
I will trust, I will trust, I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
I will trust in You!
Great song!!!
Nov 2016 · 2.1k
Last Resort
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
Cut my life into pieces
This is my last resort,
Suffocation, no breathing
Don't give a **** if I cut my arm bleeding
This is my last resort,

Cut my life into pieces
I've reached my last resort,
Suffocation, no breathing
Don't give a **** if I cut my arm bleeding
Do you even care if I die bleeding?

Would it be wrong, would it be right?
If I took my life tonight,
Chances are that I might
Mutilation out of sight
And I'm contemplating suicide

'Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

I never realized I was spread too thin
'Til it was too late and I was empty within
Hungry, feeding on chaos and living in sin
Downward spiral, where do I begin?

It all started when I lost my mother
No love for myself and no love for another
Searching to find a love upon a higher level
Finding nothing but questions and devils

'Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

Nothing's alright, nothing is fine

I'm running and I'm crying
I'm crying [4x]
I can't go on living this way

Cut my life into pieces
This is my last resort,
Suffocation, no breathing
Don't give a **** if I cut my arm bleeding

Would it be wrong, would it be right?
If I took my life tonight,
Chances are that I might
Mutilation out of sight
And I'm contemplating suicide

'Cause I'm losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine
Losing my sight, losing my mind
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

Nothing's alright, nothing is fine

I'm running and I'm crying
I can't go on living this way

Can't go on, living this way, nothing's alright
Great song. No doesn't mean I am being suicidal. I am obsessed with this song tho!
Nov 2016 · 2.4k
Lifesaver.
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I scar my skin, you get upset but still love me.
I say no one truly cares about me, you get upset but love me even more.
I have a panic attack and you sit there by my side calming me down.

You are the one Keeping me from what feels like my only friend. Its sitting in there in my closet hiding from the world till I bring it out to draw along my arms and legs like before.

You are my lifesaver. You are the reason I stopped you wanted me to so I did. The blade is not my only friend. You are. Thank you, my lifesaver.
Erin Nicole Nov 2016
I thought I was gone. Thought you took my heart with.
Turns out you weren't even the one who had it. He did. My best friend. The one I'd go to about you. The one that threatened you and never left my side.
I love him. Not you. Never did truly love you as I thought.
I thought i lot of things that turned out to be false but I am sure about him. He is  caring, loving, sweet, truthful. All thing you'll never be.
I would say I am over you but honestly one good look of you know and I realized there was nothing TO get over. haha. Now bye. Friends right ******?
Truth hurt don't it. Well for some people.
Oct 2016 · 752
Left. Locked.
Erin Nicole Oct 2016
You left.
You took the key to my heart with you.
It's locked away deep and hidden in the sorrow of
my loss of love that is swallowing my soul whole.
Oct 2016 · 936
Drama..
Erin Nicole Oct 2016
Drama. Don't put me in the middle of it. Don't start any with me. If you do then you ****** me off. If you ****** me off then you have just awoken the demon hidden deep within me and its coming out to play.
Sep 2016 · 2.6k
I'm yours. You're mine.
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
You're my babe, baby, ***.
You're my love, life, miracle.
Your're my one and only.
You're mine.

I'm your babygirl.
I'm your babe.
I'm your love.
I'm yours.

You're funny, sweet, loving.
You're sporty, cute, caring.
You're trusting, loyal, smart.
You're mine.

I'm loyal, loving, trust-worthy.
I'm caring, sweet, respectful.
I'm smart, peaceful, protective.
I'm yours.

You might not win the game, but you sure have won my heart. <3
Sep 2016 · 750
<3 <3 <3
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
You give me chills.
You make my heart beat faster at the touch.
You make me feel safe
You make me feel loved
The thought of losing you scares me
Every dream I have of you, I smile in my deep slumber, thoughts of you running through my mind.
I thought I knew love but you have proved me wrong.
I love you with all my life, heart, and soul.
You're mine. I am yours.
I'd die for you
I miss you..
I
  Love
          You...
Sep 2016 · 1.3k
Demons Are Everywhere
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
Abuse, Addiction, Anxiety
Depression
Disease, Failure, Fear
Heartbreak
Jealousy, Madness, Neglect
Pain
Racism, Sadness, Self-loathing
Violence

Then two brothers came along -

Teaching us how to fight.
Teaching us how to survive.
Teaching us how to move past
the apocalypse that is our Lives.
Teaching us to be proud of us.

THEY GIVE US HOPE!
For Supernatural fans and everyone going through a rough spot.
Sep 2016 · 3.3k
My Love
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
My love for you is strong
so strong I don't think I could carry on
without you here with me.
Your my everything, my life, my love.
And babe your the best part of me.

My love for you will never end.
My love for you is forever.
My love for you is unstoppable.
My love for you is unconditional.

Your my life, love, and best friend.
Babe your my life..
For my love, my life, and my world.
Sep 2016 · 872
Dean
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
Dean is beauty
Dean is grace
Dean will stab you in the face.
Sep 2016 · 455
For Me or Yourself
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
Time flies by in the blink of an eye.
Love goes away before you knew it was even there.
Life goes by and we still don't know why.
A tear falls down my face whenever you walk by.
The hole in my heart rips bigger and bigger when hear the sound of your voice.
Yet, when I look at you with the hoovering darkness I see you frown, a tear go down. Is that a tear for me? or a tear for the yourself? A tear saying i miss you and I truly love you and know it now. Or is that a tear of selfishness, a tear of sadness and regret for yourself.? Are you regretting your decision to date me, to pretend to love me? Tell me now or tell me never.
Sep 2016 · 2.4k
When I get where I'm going
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
When I get where I'm going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly

I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

[Chorus]
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck

[Repeat chorus]

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do

But when I get where I'm going
And I see my maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm going
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah when I get where I'm going
When i get where I'm going
By Brad Paisley and Dolly Parton
~song~
Sep 2016 · 1.2k
Gone
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
Your leaving. Your going. Going to serve your country. Going to serve the Red, White, and Blue. My brother i love you. Don't leave me. You have been there for me through everything. Grandmas death, moms breakdown, soccer tryouts. Everything. You've been there for me since I was born. I will miss you. I don't know what I'd do if something ever happened to you. I watch the videos on Youtube of those soldiers coming home and surprising their families.. I don't want to be that little sister that hasn't seen her brother in two or three years and he just shows up during her school day in front of everyone or that girl that think her big brother that was always there cant be at her graduation. I wanna know your safe and nothing will happen to you. If I freaked about your motorcycle accident what makes you think I could go two or three years at a time without you and without knowing you WILL come back. I miss you already. Don't leave me. Please. I can't take this world anymore. they tell me you will be okay and that you will be fine and nothing will happen. I don't believe them. How do they know you'll be okay.. How do you know..? Stay. Friend. Best friend. I love you bubby. Don't join up... Please...
Sep 2016 · 995
Jail
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
My friend, you tried going clean. But the drug had you hooked so bad that you didn't even come back to me. My Brother, why would you be so stupid? Why would you steal...? To pay drug debts? Why...? I broke down. I was in tears. Seeing the photos, watching your name come across the TV screen. Hearing people speak badly of my friend, buddy, Brother... It was to much for me. Now your home is a cell. The cold empty hole they like to dump you when you make a mistake. You left me here. I wanna call. I message you everyday.. I miss you. but you left. you stloe. you went to jail. Your gone and I'll probably never hear your voice again...
Sep 2016 · 4.0k
My love..
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
Dear my love,
You are the greatest thing that has happened to me in a long time. The feeling I get when I hold your hand. The happiness I feel when I see you smile or when we look each other in the eyes. I couldn't imagine life without you. I have known you forever now.. I love you babe. Your amazing. I miss you. Your mine. I'm yours.
Sep 2016 · 924
I'm back
Erin Nicole Sep 2016
I have a love. I have my home. I have my spot in this world.
I plan to keep it. I am back with my family, friends, life. Its nice
to be in a familiar place. I'm back at the place I love and others hate.
This town is home and the townspeople is my family. I love them and I wont give up on them. If i have a future... then so does my Home and Family.
Jun 2015 · 1.1k
True friends
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
A true friend doesn't care when your broke, being a *****, what you weigh, if your house is a mess, what you drive, about your past, or if family is filled with crazy people. They love you for who you are!
Jun 2015 · 906
Happiness...
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
You want to know what happiness is?
It's waking up in the middle of the night for no reason. Shifting under the blankets and feeling the warmth of the person next to you. You turn around and see them in their most peaceful, innocent, and vulnerable state. They breathe as though the weight of the world lays on anyone's shoulders but their own. You smile. Kiss their face in the most gentle manner so as not to wake them up. You turn back around and involuntary grin forms on your own face. You feel am arm wrap around your waist, and you know
it doesn't get any better than this.
Jun 2015 · 718
dont wanna loose you.
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
Every night I lay awake scared of one thing and one thing only, Loosing you. We may not be together. But im scared of never seeing you again. Never talking to you. I don't ever wanna loose you more than I already have.
Jun 2015 · 2.7k
so confused
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
Do you really love me or do you love her. You know I love you and I want you back. But you want her. You deserve better than her. You told me to get her back to you. But now you are calling me saying you don't know what to do. Help me please tell me what to do cause I am so confused.
Jun 2015 · 553
I wont change.
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
I wont change for you nor anyone! I dont care about your judgement. If you dont like me then you can leave me alone. I wont change for someone thats selfish, doesn't respect people who care.
Jun 2015 · 538
The demon brings me down!
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
I gave you a warning! I told you to stay away.
I'm poison that kills everything that comes to contact.
I care for you too much to let you get close to me!
I don't want to loose you.

You say nothing will happen to you but I know I will hurt you.
I have a demon hiding inside of me, just waiting till I get close to someone, then it will escape and take down everyone I love!
I hate that **** demon!
It always brings me down!
Jun 2015 · 279
My love for him.
Erin Nicole Jun 2015
I wish he knew how strong my love for him is but now its too late, I cant talk to him. Im too far gone, too depressed, too hurt. He will never know how I feel so I shall know forever forget of my love for a great person.
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