i can't remember when mirrors became a thing to fear;
something to avoid.

i can't remember when food became the enemy;
something to hate.

i can't remember when makeup became a mask;
something to be required.

i can't remember when my body became a bad thing;
or something to be ashamed of.
Let me apologize, to begin with because of my body type.
I will NEVER be good enough for anyone to date due to current 'hype.'
You know, the battle of 'bones' vs curves?
Just let me inflate myself to the  right number so I can properly serve
As the perfect specimen for your delicate eyes.
Obviously no one is good enough unless they've got decent thighs.

But just wait a god damn minute, because here I am again:
So let me apologize, to begin with, if I offend
You or your friends who think they're too good
To date someone size zero with some extra love under the hood.
How many times have I heard you exclaim in disgust
Of how large she is and how you'd drown in her,
If you even got near her? I saw you shaking in fear.
From your head to your toes, you were trembling dear.

See I'm told to eat less and maybe, just maybe
But if I was skinny, and let's tell the truth,
You'd be so disgusted by my looks .

I could eat a salad and still gain a pound ,
She could eat a salad and the crunch is the only sound
You hear a mile away and yet you would assume
That burgers and French fries is all that she consumed.
Do you ever stop to think, ladies and gents?
The true beauty of someone isn't based on the number on their pants.

So, let me apologize, to begin with,
If I bruise your massive ego,
But the way to tell if she's the perfect woman is not by your ego.
I’ve always been insecure about my size and how I look. I still am ...  I don’t think I’ll ever be able to love myself .. but I’m trying to. It takes a lot of self love, confidence and courage to stand up to someone who calls you out.
Ishant17 May 6
She lamented, " How fat I look, ugly me..."
I consoled," baby its fine...follow some schedule and you shan't be fat".

I regret . I lament.
How beautiful it would have been to say its fine if you look fat... being fat is beautiful and the world won't judge you...
I just want these voices to stop.
I dont want to never be good enough
I don't want to starve
I dont want to carve "FAT" on my thigh
I dont want to exercise.
I just want to be normal.
I would rather stay fat rather than unhappy,
But these voices make it hard for me to do that.
Sometimes I want to scream for help,
I want my friends to know that I am drowning
But it's so hard to find the courage to tell the truth.
These voices tell me
That they will think I'm not sick enough
That im not worth the effort
That I'm not enough for them to care
So instead, I give out subtle hints,
"I'm really sore"
I spent all night exercising
"I slept for 12 hours"
I wanted to avoid food last night so I slept and slept a lot due to the fact that I stayed up til 2 am doing squats all week
"Im hungry"
I've been fasting for 18 hours
No one could possibly understand unless they ask
And if they asked, they cared.
So why tell them if they wouldn't care enough?
Mi vida loca
Natasha Apr 20
Guy One liked thick girls.
But I didn’t have curves so I started
Doing squats
When I would take a picture I would cringe
At the flatness of my ass
The thinness of my thighs
The sparseness of my arms.

Guy Two liked skinny girls.
And I had gained some weight so I started
Eating less
Running the treadmill
Pretending drinks were meals
I would stare at the toilet bowl and cringe
At the rolls in my stomach
The bulge above my jean hem
The loose skin below my chin.

I like strong girls
Who look in the mirror and smile
At their curves and dips
The stretch marks and bones
The freckles, the dark circles, the dry patches–

My body is a sanctuary
And if you don’t like it
Then fuck off.

When you call me these things
I melt
Because I'm used to

I Really Want food
But I Really want love
Love and food don't mix well

One day you're told you're perfect,
the next rejected because of body type

I wish everyone was hungry for love
pension Mar 22
ice creams, cakes and açaí bowls
fried food like fries and many more,
my palate can’t seem to get enough of these
scrumptious delights.

momentary joy and everlasting guilt,
I struggle to keep myself awake with these horrible thoughts.

my waist, my thighs have grown to be
superlatively unattractive and
my heart is twisted dry

how can I find solace in a world which values body

much less belly bloating
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