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The billion dollar smile,
I must plaster,
Every day versatile,
She’s sewing her bleeding dreams,
With twigs from tears of littered streams,
Your mother asks you right away,
Are you okay?
I’m doing fine,
But, I know that’s a straight-out lie, I pine
Today’s not my day...sorry
Chin up darling
Though the day feels so bland
I know that it's hard
Like youre stuck in quicksand
But soon the quagmire
Will ease and release
Soon I'll be home
For you to cuddle and tease
Until then, just know this:
I'll be missing you too-
So please dont be down
Or give in to the blues.
My coffee got cold
as I sat and took
a big scary test,
that I passed all of,
except for the portion I failed.

I sipped the cold sweet latte
for comfort,
and the room temperature
liquid
washed over me.

It was snowing,
and the wet icy flakes
stung my face as I walked
to my favorite used clothing store.

I walked out again
with a luxurious pair
of twelve dollar jeans,
and a few shirts.
I splurged thirty-five
painful
dollars.

My now boyfriend
saw my ex boyfriend
walking the grounds of his college,
a rude text massage
and I knew he was there to stay.

Confirmation of my failed math test
echoed in my ears
as I talked to a very nice lady
on the phone.

Only a few minutes later
and the words of my mother
sound in my ears
telling me she made a mistake
again,
and I have to figure out
an insurance plan
on my own,
and she doesn't know how to advise me
either.

I cried into my salad
that I'm only eating
because
I hate my body,
and I feel like no one
can love me with it.

Cold coffee,
failed tests,
no money,
clothing that should be cheap
and was too expensive for me.
Worry
in every much needed expense.
Hunger in my belly
and hoping it will shrink.

It's just been a bad day.
jaden Jan 2016
Some days I am so sad I feel like I could throw up.
I imagine it's all the words I've swallowed trying to climb out of me.
On days like this, I think about all the times people have told me I deserve to be happy.
And for some reason, I cannot stop crying.
On days like this, I find myself not able to get out of bed.
On days like this, I think to myself, "There are no good days; only days like this."
Sometimes I can't seem to shake the feeling that everyone's out to get me.
And suddenly, people start to smile brighter when I'm not around.
I know what I must do.

On days like this, I wish I could just cut this sadness out of me.


abandon ship
j.c.
Ken Mears Nov 2019
Some days,

Things go your way

Some days,

Others, you want to cry all day.


When the worst days come

And trust me, they will,

Just start to hum,

And keep going over that hill.


When it feels like the world,

Is tumbling down,

Deep into the underworld,

And you think you may drown.


Hold your head up high,

And just push on,

Keep your face to the sky,

And focus thereon.


When everything around,

Feels like it's ablaze,

While you are fear-bound,

Trapped in a maze.


Think back to the best days,

When you saw the future bright,

For that future is always,

Just within your sight.
CharmedlyJynxed Oct 2019
Today, i let myself cry hard over some stupid things. I was sooooo annoyed to the point na pag iyak nalang nagawa ko. It felt really heavy kaya bigla nalang nagburst out. Naawa ako sa sarili but at the same time mas nainis ako sa sarili ko kasi hinayaan kong ganunin ako at hinayaan ko sarili kong maramdaman yun when infact i know i am better than that. Kaso being the same usual me, mas pinili ko nalang manahimik, umintindi at umiyak. The feeling of Being taken for granted is sooo distressing. I always feel that way and believe me i super hate it but what i hate the most is the fact that i dont have the courage to stand for myself which led people around me to think that everything is okay with me. At times, I really want to be selfish and btch. Nakakapagod ding maging mabait. :(
10/21/19
Espresso manic Sep 2019
The genie inside the bowl
told me of his lowest day eighteen fortnights ago.
The day he did not feel like a genie.
He awoke yet his eyes cried for the return of rest.
The one wish he could not concede
plagued his mind.
He did not know
how. He could not bend
the rules of time
to fulfill the most human
desire which is to wish
to never have to wish
that the present day
was not a bad day.

Like the transaction
between a poker dealer
and the man with no fear
in his eyes,
we barter with life on a cyclical game of poker.
Sometimes the house wins,
and it hurts like a thumb tacker.
A pair 2s is so inconsequential against
life happening.
No genie can stand in the way
of life happening.

The genie in the bowl
told me to make the most of this low day
happening, go on a stroll,
to take care of myself
and recognize that today is just a bad day.
Perhaps tomorrow will be better,
in the meantime get some sleep
and to try again tomorrow.
The genie in the bowl did give me a wish. Now I know how to recognize a bad day.
Not a literal genie.
Amarie Jun 2019
In a place halfway between the sweet release of sleep and just feeling like complete and utter crap, I lay here collapsed on my bed with an elbow jammed painfully into my ribs while I ignore the pain, letting it blend in and start to numb just like everything else.

Caught up in a state of feeling like I should be bawling my eyes out but not having enough energy or motivation to do so, I lay here with my eyelids closed so tightly that a few tears seep through my lashes and down my cheeks.

With a shaky breath and a racing heart, I lay here ready to pass out from sheer exhaustion just so that I don't have to feel anything for a few hours.

Staring at the ceiling in the pitch black and empty darkness, I have nothing but my own thoughts and my mind's picture board to haunt me as I lay here contemplating life.

For the first time in what feels like forever, I questioned why I was still living, why I was still breathing, and laying here made me realize how **** tired I am.

Laying here, I questioned my sanity, why I am feeling what I am feeling at this very instant; not only is my heart racing, but it has this aching pain pressed around it and no matter how much I toss and turn, the feeling squeezes tighter and tighter until I am choking on my own breath as I try to gasp for clean air.

I finally let out a sob, and the tears start to flow freely.

It feels like someone has taken a pin and stuck it in me, and is pulling at my heartstrings for their own amusement.

I have no ******* idea why I feel like this, only that I don't know how to make it stop.

I can't tell whether this aching pain is the result of me longing to be with you, or my longing to not be alone anymore.

And the fact that I cannot figure this out makes me want to cry even more.

I don't want to be alone anymore...it feels like I have been condemned the fate of loving you -of loving everyone- for all of eternity only to have the void in my core never to be filled.

This is my suffering, this is how life shows me that being human is not all sunshine and rainbows, this is how I know that existence is sometimes pain and agony.

I clench my teeth until they feel ready to break, I ball up my fists until the veins in my wrists nearly burst, I tense my muscles until they start to cramp... I want to scream, but I can't.

I don't have a voice with any practice for yelling, and if I were to try, my mouth would be agape with no sound.

I would mimic the action of screaming, just so that I could feel the pressure build up in my neck.

For the first time in years, I bang my fists against my skull so that I can feel more, so that I can feel pain.

My hands are too weak to do any real damage, but just strong enough to make me feel that certain 'something' that can replicate the sweet elixir I have been looking for to fill this hole in my heart.

My stomach feels empty yet bloated all in the same and it is the eighth day I have gone without eating anything beside half a bowl of cereal for breakfast.

Why now, why right ******* now?!?

I was feeling so happy, so free, just a few hours ago, and I probably will tomorrow morning -but the emptiness will still be there, this I know for sure- and I will open my eyes, stare at the textured ceiling of my room, and shut them again so that I can inhale a deep sigh before getting up to brush the horrible taste from my mouth.
Sometimes we have bad days, and that’s okay. The bad days make us more in touch with ourselves and help us figure out what to do to make tomorrow happy.
Tommy Randell May 2019
I walk the dog before I'm awake almost,
when the streets are empty as I prefer.

I've found if you talk to anyone new, the next time your paths cross
before you disappear, they change direction uninvited,
even cross the road just to talk to you.

That's a Code Blue right there. Code. Blue


I'm into work and my monitor is down
And the guy cant fix it 'cause there's a flu bug going round.

Listen I've got deadlines, I've got problems to solve,
and the woman at the photocopier is just chewing and chewing
like she's still eating her breakfast and has all day to do it.

Blue flashes behind eyes, real Indigo needles. Code. Blue.


I'm sat at the Bar minding my own business.
I'm still checking my emails and Instagram.

Some people just wanna poke their eyes over your shoulder
to check out the screen view, being ****** nosey
by habitually climbing into other people's personal space.

That's a a big No-no! for sure. Code. Blue.


On the subway or the bus with all the other empty seats
They sit down next to you and they let out a sigh.

I don't want to listen, I don't want to share, I really don't care,
And there goes my stillness, and there goes my peace,
And one of these days there will go my temper and I will blow that fuse.

Then there'll be a Code Blue... MIGHTY! Code. Blue.
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