------------------------------------
 \ why is it that time slips /                              
   \she slides and slithers /
     \right through these  /
        \ infinite crevices  /
          \found all over /
             \my greedy /
                \ hands,  /
                   \ like /
                   /    •   \
                 /       s      \
              /            a       \
           /             n            \
        /                 d              \
      /                                      \
    / in the dainty hourglass \
  /sitting aloft my skew shelf.\
-----------------------------------------

his eyes are warm, a hazel brown
upon his head the devil’s crown
hell's fire reveals his true intention
it's why the lord refused his ascension
his lust it flickers, a candle in the storm
mine burns for him, undying, unnerving
he doesn't love me
he never will
but oh he's a man when he grips my thigh
he spreads me open and makes me sigh
asserting dominance he whispers sin
i cry for god but my voice runs thin
he's had his ***** way with me
I'm tainted, ruined, marked and done
he's finished with me, had his fun
yet
sometimes in my wildest dreams
I yearn for him and that wicked gleam.

if the sun disappears
and the stars say farewell
would you be the only light
for those left to dwell?

when i was young
ammi packed me lunch
one strawberry jam sandwich
cut neatly into squares

as i grew older
and my tummy much bigger
(along with my appetite)
one turned into two
two to three
and finally
for some unknown reason
there were no strawberry jam sandwiches
but ammi still packed me lunch

it was tuna or chicken
maybe tomato and cheese
sometimes a pastry
i wasn't hard to please

and it never occurred to me
that my strawberry sandwiches
were gone

till one completely random day
i'm sitting with my friends
taking the first bite of my sandwich
a burst of strawberry fills my mouth
sweet, rich with sugar
it tastes red, good bright red
my strawberry jam sandwich came back
and i was bombarded by my childhood
playing on the swings sandwich in hand
red coated crumbs dotting my shirt
running out of class as soon as the bell rings
to munch munch munch
on my strawberry sandwiches

strawberry jam was never my favourite filling
but it filled me with memories
so occasionlly
when i'm feeling nostalgic
i'll pick up a slice, butter it up
spread my gooey, red friend
and share a sandwich with ammi.

they say love is blind
some speak of it’s weakness
lack of existence
turmoiling persistence

oh how they’re wrong

i’ve seen what it does, felt it's affliction
falling in love, you can’t choose your conviction  

love isn't just blind
it's deaf and so mute

your words, how they echo
the feel of unrest
i will always remember you, as nothing but best
your memory won't taint
your image, clean, so pure
the meticulous thoughts, and prominent words
things you said, and phrases unspoken
your hesitation and pride
the look in your eyes
the expressive emotion
all led to my demise

i tried moving on
clearly, it failed
i'll never feel free
save yourself, leave me be.

through thick and thin
that’s what we said
but now i look across the bed
the empty space, so big and clear
it’s all that i could ever fear

close friends at best
never more
but now it’s gone
forgotten lore

why did we
entwine our limbs
embrace in passion
on such a whim

i regret that night
our thoughts astray
clouded by the playful day

now you barely look at me
and when you do I see the guilt
it’s ok
i feel it too
but if you’d just talk to me
i’d help you realize, you’re still free

please don’t regret my body’s touch
or how you sought the sheets to clutch
but most important
don’t forget
what we had before the end
a loving friendship, down to the core
never thought I’d see the door
i’m locked outside
you have the key
through thick and thin?
guess that was just me.

i like to look at things that shine

fireworks projected into the sky
and like a shooting star they fall
some wish
i watch
as it splits into an array of colours
a few seconds of beauty
quickly enveloped by the night sky

floating lanterns, so ominous
so pretty and mysterious
dots across the dark horizon
the endless darkness tainted
by blurs of light from a distace
but up close they truly are
an enchanting spectacle

camp fires are surreal
what stories do they hold
it rages and fights
it consumes, magnificent
so powerful and yet
so wise

candles bring out memories
if i stare too long
its rhythmic flame will devour me
the tiny light brings out the biggest shadows
like a trance it pulls me in
blow it out, then i'll be free

neon trapped within traffic lights
the red has immeasurable power
amber hues bring on despair
green commands attention
but in the dead of the night
when not a single soul roams by
driving past the glowing lines
of light upon light
i enter a realm of nostalgia

i see the flash of lightning
it is ferocious
commands respect
but when i watch it
from behind a window pane
with raindrops streaking down
the thunder muted, the dark clouds
they emit the most beautiful violet light
it comes and goes in simply seconds

and how could i forget the stars
always there
but only alive
in the depths of the night
scattered across the sky
they glow like an accessory
desired but unreachable
i stretch my hand out high
a little more and i can touch them.

it’s crazy how superstition works
any belief, sometimes even religion
can make you go completely bezerk

it’s 23.10hrs in the night
i’m lying here and thinking
it’s really, nearly time
ironic how I write this
for my mother always told me
it'll only come true
if you keep it a secret

but,
I just have to write this
and pray that you see it


It’s 23.11 in the depths of the night
I wish you were here.

isn’t it truly amazing
this universe
in which we co-exist
has evolved
through dinosaurs
evolution and wars
heartbreak and turmoil
happiness and moments of peace  
every single event
extravagant or minute
each occurrence played a part
to mould this space we live in
so many contributions
in the form of attributions
all the tongues created
words spoken, thoughts shared
stories passed down through generations
buildings assembled, torn down
life and death
diseases and cures
chaos and equilibrium
a perpetuous cycle playing out
continuously on loop
all of it comes together
to form this mess of an education system
that’s makes me want to **** myself.

let me teach you
how to dance
to the song that is my heartbeat

first; lay your head upon my chest
stay silent, unmoving, hold your breathe
nothing?
no, there it is
steady, unyeilding, comforting
but as I feel you slowly exhale
it’s tempo accelerates
of course you induce that
‘butterflies in my stomach’ effect
if I was talking, I would’ve stuttered
as your fingers absentmindedly
drew patterns on my wrists
i could feel the hairs rising
my body calling out to your touch
gentle, calming, peaceful
and when I peak at you
your eyes are closed, relaxed
savouring the moment
our pulses meld together
and dance a tranquil tango.

the worst part about you leaving
must be the doubt
that maybe, just maybe
i might forget.

your presence
is a reminder of simply everything
and sometimes when you smile
in that quirky way of yours
i’ll remember a specific memory we shared

so if your eyes aren’t here
to glisten just right
and remind me of our talks at night
then, maybe, just maybe
i might forget.

my advice is always
make a choice
you know you won’t regret
if you must choose between a few
darling please don’t fret.

it’s okay to regret the things
you didnt get to choose
but don’t remorse the one you did
means you didn’t think it through.

now here i am lying down
deep within my thoughts
maybe if I tweaked those words
i would have more than nought

it doesn’t really feel so great
to be the choice that wasn’t chosen
perhaps if i had thought it through
these tears would not be falling.

i'd take up a lasso to the stars
rearrange them

a bucket of water
extinguish the sun

walk a mile
in a second

lessen your pain
bear your burden

but don't ask me
to stop loving you
some things
just can't be done.

i use poetry to describe
a vast array of things
but
it has occurred to me
there are no individual words
i could possibly string together
to illustrate you.

it’s 3:06am
the demons
they seem to be running late

i pray arrival is soon
their presence
much more reassuring
than being left alone in my thoughts.

in a universe
full of drifting souls
you chose me,
the forgotten and abandoned

i warned you
all my pages were empty
but that didn’t deter you
in fact
you were more intrigued

and now i understand
it’s because
your pages were also blank

so we held hands
and scrawled our words
in writing that’s messy
only because there’s
so much to express
in so little time
and we just might forget
if it’s not written down

now my pages
they’re full
and yours are the same

two souls mingling
forgotten and abandoned
by all but eachother.

             you see they sang two different tunes
             but together, the masterpiece formed
            her                                                        his
            treble                                                  bass
            rang                                                     low
           out                                               ­         soft
           into                                    ­                    and
           the                                               ­           full
           night                                            ­         with
           joins                                     ­                  love
          his in                                                   for her
    harmony                                               soothing
perfectly in                                          perfectly in
sync.                                                     sync.

character development is truly amazing
every point of view, is constantly changing
and i have this habit; immensely annoying
of falling in love, with love

suddenly, i notice what she doesn't see (yet)
together we ridiculed him
too short, not my type
i've know him my whole life!
but suddenly
his shoulders; are they broader?
and that voice, its much deeper
stance gotten wider, masculine
more attractive.

this is unquestionably unacceptable
emotional whiplash
how did his eyes get more golden
no,
its just how the sun hits them
we never saw it like this before
a whole new perspective
this isn't healthy

he's defensive, possessive
hard headed and difficult
but
he looks at her differently
how does she not see it?
how did i not see it??
its more tender and caring
dare i say loving

character development
the bane of my existence.

hey there pianist
play us something please
wipe away those dusty keys
and bring us to our knees

why hum those tunes
when you can play
guide these voices on their way
and show us how its done

i know you miss those wildin' days
when your hands flew up and down
try once more, don't be shy
and stop with that ol' frown

i see your fingers itch and search
when you hear a melody
to replicate that very sound
this is your only remedy

hey there pianist
play us something please.

they think you're all
curly hair and pretty eyes
a charming smile
silver tongue
a living god

but

afraid of mice
you like tomatoes
allergic to bees
full of theories
bursting with dreams


theres just some things
that a late night
entwining of limbs
just won't reveal.