Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Kitts May 2015
You call me your lover, you call me your friend
But boy you have to realize our love has come to an end

You try to make me remember when all i want to do is forget
You know perfectly well I haven't just yet

Holding me close only makes me want to run
Just loosen up and let me have some fun

I don't love you, maybe I never did, for you never satisfied
All you ever wanted to do was play games, cheat and lie

You make me remember the times good and bad
You make me remember all the times you made me sad

I am not the girl you used to love, I am not child you fell for
I am a woman, not a girl, I have fought and over came the world, I am no cheap *****

You tell me you love me, you worship me still
But boy you don't know that you're heart I'll ****

You broke me, you hurt me, you made me cry
And yet you're still wondering why I said good bye?

You call me your lover, say that I'll always belong to you
But baby, the thought of loving you makes me all shades of blue

I have found a guy who treats me so very right
I spend most days talking with him long into the night

You tell me you love me, you don't know a thing
You tell me you want to buy me a diamond ring

Boy you know nothing, all you do is make me cry
You're like a fat catfish and I'm ready to fry

So run away child of my past, don't you know we were never meant to last
You should have run away from me, should have run so fast

I held you close once, couldn't live without you
And now that I am happy you come running right back, wanting to make me blue

I used to burn your sign into my skin, just to my loyalty
But you treated me like a slave, he treats me like royalty

He loves me, you never did, You wanted to maintain the life that you hide
He know me deeply, knows exactly what is down deep inside

What can you offer that he can't offer more?
He treats me like a queen., you treated me like a *****

You call me your lover, you call me your friend
But darling this torture you call love has come to its end

I have found someone who just cannot be compared to you
He is a King of the night, you're just a Prince dying for a fight

So go to hell and take your feeling with you
Because darling, we are now through
May 2015 · 802
Not To Me
Kitts May 2015
You say you're just a savage
But to me you were always more

You smell of blood and war
But to me there was always more

You love to laugh in my face
You call me foolish and push me away

I stand so still, for you are
a Mountain Lion, I'm just an outside tabby cat

If you wanted you could hurt me
For in the past you have, you've done it before

You called me names and stop
You stop talking to me, you've made me cry

But there is a beauty in your madness
You make me want to walk beside you, I don't know why...

You say I have a heart of solid black
And if my heart was black then yours is that of space

You make me crazy, I want you that much
You tell me to go away, with snarl in your voice

But how can I go away? How can I leave?
When you are like a black hole and I can never be free

There is beauty in your eyes, like space without sunlight
You once wanted me... but now I am just a nuisance

You told me once that you cared about me
How happy I once was... When you cared

But I was fool...
For Mountain Lions tend to eat outside tabby cats
May 2015 · 932
ツ I'm Dead Inside ツ
Kitts May 2015
People don't fall in love with the death they see in me
They just notice the glimmers of life left in me

I like to run away from their love because
Everything that is around me goes madder then the hatter

I try to save them all from myself, from the monster in me
But tonight I am all alone and I need someone who isn't friendzoned

I lay in my bed, dead thoughts float in the deep water in my head
I would love to have a lover or two who know just what to do

But an undead lover is hard to find, they don't make them anymore
And I certainly don't want a human manwhore to come knocking at my door

So here I lay hating all that is alive and wishing even more of me were dead inside
I run all throughout the day, from the sunlight I try to get away

For the sun shows off my morgue styled scars and the blueness of my skin
But at night no body knows, no one gets who I actually am

I dress to impress and wear perfume to mask the rotting smell of my breath
No one seems to care that the putrid smell lingers everywhere
May 2015 · 440
Our Hearts
Kitts May 2015
Our hearts beat faster then fast can be
It runs in our thick blood, you see?

I was nineteen when my heart took control
My breath ****** into my chest like a black hole

My body shook and trembled violently, I fell to the floor
I started to cry, begging my heart for no more!

Against my rib cage it crashed like the tides of the sea
You would have been just as scared if you had been me

With my hand on my chest, I breathed real deep
From my eyes long drops of tears I did weep

I tried to stop my hearts beat, so very frantic
I was oddly calm as I wept tears of physical panic

I knew it would happen to me... I just never thought it'd be so soon
The physical discomfort of my own heartbeat was like a monsoon

I held my breath and counted to ten... Trying to get my rhythm to still on it's own
My Mom from 47 minutes away frantically told me to go to a doctor, for what for my body to be shown?

So I laid in my bed and let my heartbeat go wild...
I listened to Modred's Lullaby remembering the lyrics from when I was a child

"Hush, child
The darkness will rise from the deep
And carry you down into sleep
Child, the darkness will rise from the deep
And carry you down into sleep"

Finally my eyes closed, and I thought to myself as a lines from  Haelstorm's song Mz Hyde
Resounded in my skull until it was deep inside

"Welcome to the nightmare in my head,
Say hello to something scary,
The monster in your bed,
Just give in and you won’t be sorry,
Welcome to my other side,
Hello it’s Mz. Hyde!"


I actually faded...faded away
How amazed when I woke up the very next day...
Fear terror heartproblems serious ER Music fading away crying faint
May 2015 · 994
Are you still there?
Kitts May 2015
are you still there?
underneath all that anger?
do you still care?

or is my dead heart reading
too much into your words again
do i still have a part

of your heart that still beats?
or is your heart as dead as mine?
do you still burn for me?

or am I just a faded memory?
I miss you daily, the you I knew
when you didn't hide from me

are you still fire or are you now ash?
should I mourn or rejoice
at you coming back...
May 2015 · 879
You Were Fire
Kitts May 2015
You Were Fire
Once upon a time
How cliche is that?
But it fits with you

I read a poem you wrote
And I knew I had to meet
The dark fixated poet

And I fell so long ago
Though it seems like yesterday
We were wrapped in each others

Lustful digital arms
You stared in my dreams
It was you I wrote about

You, the darling torturer
I, the willing victim
Sometimes I remember how you burned

Seemingly just for me, what a fool
I was to think you wouldn't change
What a little girl I was

Hoping to catch you and put you in amber
Keeping that fire burning forever
As I'd hold you up in the moonlight

But you changed... And so did I
I wanted things to be set in stone
And I didn't know fire... when caught tends to burn...
May 2015 · 2.7k
My Soul Has Color
Kitts May 2015
My heart can be compared to the northern lights
It is reflected in my dark brown eyes
That flash colors that no one can explain

Blues the base of all the other colors
All colors fade and melt into the blueness of my soul
My red passion mixed with my blue depression turns into a lustful purple

My hearts deep blue depths sparkle with life
Flashing strands of neon green rise from the depths to the surface and pool there

Embers the colors of vibrant oranges, violent reds and golden yellow burn in the deep blues
Making my soul look angry and aggressive
Though when the brave reach out to touch

They are not burned with the heat of fire but by the fierce pain of pure ice
I watch as if in a dream as my soul changes shape and color
Sometimes it's icy beauty takes my breath away

And causes tears to fill my dark flashing eyes
My soul has seasons like the Earth
Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall
Each season brings its own colors and feelings

It is an endless color wheel that is alive and fills the room with it's life
But sometimes there is no color...
And my soul goes black... and it takes love to bring the color back...
May 2015 · 899
Please...
Kitts May 2015
Make me forget who I am for a night
You can do what you want just hold me tight
My pain is evident in my dark eyes
My mouth painted red with loves lies

My nails dig into your back deep
As you make me forget I weep
Something about the man that is you
I forget the things that make my heart blue

You press your lips against mine consuming my soul
But that is what you do... that's your goal...
You make me numb with this thing called love
But to handle the beast you're going to have to wear more then a satin glove

My heart slows as you give me what I want
But I know my actions tonight will haunt
I know you are doing what you do best
By causing me to forget the pain caused by all the rest
Apr 2015 · 936
"ily, bby"
Kitts Apr 2015
You tell me on facebook "ily, bby"
Not even taking the time to type it out...

You ask me constantly if I am going to leave
I lay in bed crying at night because you forget me

So many guys want to be in my life that it hurts...
It hurts that I have to break their trusting gaze

Because I'm looking towards you...
Looking, hoping praying that your love is true

When I met you I told you to call me Kitty or Blue
But instead you call me by my real name, something few people do

When we first got together we were hotter then fire and gasoline
Now we're barely a half empty lighter on a chain smoker

When did things fade away? When did things start to change?
When did you finally get sick of being with me?

You still tell me you love me... But I have to say it first...
Am I just a nuisance? Do I actually annoy you?

Tears fill my eyes as my feelings I compromise...
You are getting away with my ******

The ****** of my heart and soul, the flash in my eyes
I become the meekest child under your gaze

And I just no longer know what to do...
Because I fear I no longer love you...
Apr 2015 · 3.2k
I Searched My Whole Life
Kitts Apr 2015
I have searched my whole life for someone like you
Though I have lied and told others that, it's different I mean it with you

I have ****** up every relationship I have ever been in...
Fear has wrecked my love for anyone before you

But with you I am not afraid... I am strong
You are what I want... I will do whatever it takes to keep you

You don't ask me to do anything... You never have
You read my poems about other guys, pure fiction

I thought you would leave then... That you wouldn't let me explain
But you stopped and let me talk to you... let me explain

How I cut up my memories and glue them together to make a poem
It was simply astonishing how your anger faded, how you excepted my fiction

You are the Sun to my Moon I reflect the love, the light I see in you
Everything about you I simply adore, I wait all day until the night

For that's when we can talk for hours on end
You have no idea how cold I was before you...

I hope you never learn all the things I've done
I know you have an idea but you haven't heard it from my mouth

How I sought to break guys hearts, how I'd lie to make them love me...
All because people broke my heart... But then you tamed the beast inside

You made her love you as much as I do, you disarmed my traps
With your honesty you won my respect... I've never respected any of my lovers from the past

If I could I'd tell you everything I've ever done... But I'd run out of words...
I was a beast before you loved me that's about the simplest way to put it
Apr 2015 · 1.1k
He Says
Kitts Apr 2015
He says I am the most interesting person he knows
I just laugh and pull him towards me and hug him close

He gets distracted by the T.V and I understand
That I mean the world to him, but his mind wonders

I always shiver when he tells me he loves me
Me, not anyone else, just me that he loves me

He knows that I've fallen in love so many times
Yet he believes in my broken heart, he knows I'm faithful

I fell in love with his honest ways, the way his eyes shined
I didn't fall in love with his body, as I have done that before

I fell for his truth, the way he came right up to me and talked to me
He talked to me first and he never knew how much that meant...

He fell for me before I fell for him, but once I fell, I fell so hard
I've always been afraid of love, afraid of needing someone so much

He knows I'm the queen of fictional love... And yet he trusts me
I do not understand this kind of faith... Yet I have craved it my whole life

Gone are all thoughts of past lovers, no more poems about them
He has gently dominated my mind and conquered what others only dream about

I know I'm not the best person in the world, I'm not the most prettiest girl
But when he tells me he loves me, I literally shine, at least my eyes do

A warmth comes upon my cold heart, soul and mind
When he comes around it is like I become Alaska in summertime

He melts the ice around my soul and makes me want to sing
I have never felt so safe with a guy... Have never known such comfort...

If he were a food he would have to be the most cheesiest of Mac And Cheese
I hope my darkness doesn't seep into his soul... I hope he doesn't change...

My fears are real, so very real... If he leaves me now I don't know what I would do
He makes me so happy and yet he calls himself boring

I just laugh and hold him so very close, for he doesn't know just how much
I love him... How much his love has changed my life...
Apr 2015 · 5.3k
Feathers and Beads
Kitts Apr 2015
I have in my possession
A collection of
Fine feathers and beads
Of pretty colors
So wonderful to see
My collection of
Fine feathers and beads
Apr 2015 · 3.7k
Racist VS Culturist
Kitts Apr 2015
I am
not a
true racist...
I am
a culturist...
I do
not like
certain...cultures...
Even though
that culture
is my
own....
Kitts Apr 2015
My Mother called my Grandmother a  "***** Gypsy" a long time ago
I never knew what it meant until I gave that part of my heritage a go

The Romani left India about 1,500 years ago, traveling, running ever since
The White people of the Medieval Ages hated them, at their very presence they took offense...

In some areas of Europe it was a common practice to mutilate the woman, **** and stolen kisses
And they branded the men with hot pokers... Who can understand this?

They were forbidden to speak in their native tongue
Yet their songs of joy and laughter are still sung
My heart breaks for the Gypsies For my Grandmother was one...
Apr 2015 · 2.5k
I Curse Anciently
Kitts Apr 2015
I sometimes curse in Cherokee

ᎪᎳᎩᏂᎨᏒᎾ means stupid
ᏗᎦᎵᏯᏅᎯᏛ mean donkey
Just add them together
It means stupid ***

ᎤᏗᏆᎸᏕᏯᏛ means *****
ᏂᎯ means you
Just add them together
It means ***** you

ᎧᎵᏬᎯ means perfect
ᎪᎳᎩᏂᎨᏒᎾ means idiot
just add the two together
it means perfect idiot

I love to create insults in Cherokee
My Grandfather would be so proud of me
I love it, it's so addicting
Why don't you try it? You might like the way they taste
Apr 2015 · 869
She Eats Pocky
Kitts Apr 2015
I saw her as I walked down the street
She was the kind of girl I'd love to meet

She wore the blackest of bikini tops
With cut off shorts you can't get in shops

Her hair was long and fell down her golden back
Just from looking upon her I lost all tack

In her small hands I saw something so right
In those lovely hands she held a box so tight

A pretty red box you can get at the walmart Asian aisle
Seeing that box just made me smile

I watched her as I walked on by
I listened to the way she sighed

I loved the way she took such tiny bites
Oh, the way that girl swallowed, it made me forget her rights

I forced myself to continue to walk
Knowing that girl would never want to talk...
For my pocky lovers everywhere
Apr 2015 · 5.6k
Nightmare Exhaustion
Kitts Apr 2015
I...
    
                    Can't...
                                      
Sleep...

                      For...

The...    
                                        
               Fear...

                                  
Invades...

                         My...
                                                            
                                                                          
Dreams...

                                   Making...


Me...

                      Cry...
Apr 2015 · 1.2k
My School
Kitts Apr 2015
I have always struggled in all grades of school    
Teachers always thought of me as the angry fool    
    
I love to read, I love to draw and I love to write,    
But no one won when they got me to actually fight    
    
So very lonely, I dreaded going to school everyday    
There was no one to stop that in a loving way    
    
No one understood my issues that had yet to be reveled    
I had yet to learn that what was broken could be healed    
    
No one cared to know what was the matter with the freak    
That knowledge was not for the average person so weak    
    
I grew stronger mentally each day, my mentality growing hard    
I didn't know that in the future I would be given a lucky card    
    
A card called Lincoln, the home of the Phoenix    
People don't always go willing there, and few actually picks    
    
Almost in the center of a town I didn't really know    
There is a school like no other school in the USA, you'll wish you could go    
    
Once you hear how the teachers actually help you    
How the food is kinda good most days and people actually care, it's true    
    
I didn't believe it at first, no, not at all    
I didn't talk to anyone; I hid in a dark hall    
    
Then I met a boy in Physical Education, P.E. who called me Gypsy, thanks to my skirts    
He introduced me to the rest of his friends and they eased life's hurts    
    
My school saved my life; they helped me so very much    
My school may be called Lincoln but it has a mothers loving touch    
    
And when I was homeless they helped me find a place to stay,    
They made sure I was safe and secure each and every day    
    
They helped me overcome my issues with math and taught me more    
About poetry and rather than any door I could have opened I opened Lincolns Door    
    
They taught me that I shouldn't be afraid to learn and no one would hurt me    
If I got things wrong, with praise and love I flourished and it is clear to see    
    
I will always be a part of Lincoln and Lincoln a part of me, for only the lucky go to Lincoln, the place only the few picks    
That with college coming up Lincoln the home of the Phoenix  
  
That High School will always have a part of my heart
Apr 2015 · 3.1k
Aries, My Father
Kitts Apr 2015
My Mother has always been attracted to violent, cowardly men
So one night she went to a local, seedy bar located in the bad side of town
She was barely 19 but had a fake ID bought from a clever counterfeiter
As she sipped her third Black Russian in walked an attractive man
He wore far too much black leather; leather pants, jacket and vest and biker boots
When he took off his helmet his Grecian looks were extremely apparent  
He noticed my Mother right away... She was the most beautiful of the woman there
Her blonde hair fell around her shoulders, her blue eyes flashed
And sparkled in the light of the dimly lite bar
Their eyes made contact and she brought her drink to her mouth
Her light pink tongue ran around the rim of the glass
The dark man raised an eye brow at her and made his way to the
Bar stool my mother had her legs propped upon, her incredible long white legs
He looked at them and touched her ankle without a word
He ran his thumb over her pale and soft skin, with just one touch
He had my Mother completely under his spell
Finally after seconds that felt like centuries he lifted his hand from her ankle
He asked if he could buy her a drink and sit by her
Breathless she nodded her head and moved her legs to allow him to sit
He bought her another drink and they sat and talked for awhile
The ****** tension was almost tangible between them
He loved how brass she was, how she argued with his beliefs and how she flirted to get her way
She asked about his motorcycle and he offered to take her for a ride
She responded with a puzzled "Now???"
And he laughed a deep laugh and responded with an accented "If you would like"
She got up and whispered in his ear "I'd like to very much get a ride"
My Mothers heart raced for she had never done anything like this before
But she had to have this man, this man that she had just met
With a smile that nearly blinded her he got up and placed his hand
Dangerously low on her back, exactly where her shirt ended and the small line of skin was
He had kept his hands on her the entire night but this touch almost burned
My mother let him herd her out of the bar and once they were outside
He walked over to the meanest looking machine she had ever seen
With concern she looked at her mini skirt knowing a lot of leg would show if she got on that bike
He laughed at her face and climbed onto the bike
He tossed the extra helmet he had to her and beckoned for her to climb on
When she did he ran his right hand down her each of her legs making sure they were pressed against his
My mother was in for the ride of her life...
For this man was not a man at all but a God...
FICTION
Apr 2015 · 410
Would You?
Kitts Apr 2015
Would you travel across the oceans for my love?
Would you love me enough to fly in the sky above?

Would you do what others have always failed at?
Would you give me each and every brutally honest fact?

Would you cuddle with me after we've ******?
Would you just get dressed and drive away in some truck?

Would you leave me when you see how messed up I can be?
Would you stay and never let me be only me?

Would you? Could you ever do that for someone you haven't met?
Would you? For that kind of person I haven't met yet

Would you hold my hand in public and not care when others looked?
Would you forget to plan a date and make me laugh as you argue with the waiter for being over booked?

Would you just stay up and lay beside me and talk about everything?
Would you stay up and tell me just about anything to get me to sleep, even sing?

Would you? could you do it? For I just haven't met anyone like that yet
Would you wipe my tears away as I cry myself quietly asleep? Even if you are tired and for sleeping you are all set?

Would you do it or should I pack my heart up and move on?
Would you? Could you do these things for me? Or has the Heart Break Fairy won?
Apr 2015 · 718
Once Upon A Broken Heart
Kitts Apr 2015
once upon a time there was a
girl with dark hair and dark eyes
who met a boy who broke her
fragile heart into several pieces
the pieces then flew to the
arms of several different boys
the boys the pieces flew to didn't
know exactly what to do with just a piece
so from their calloused hands
the sharp broken heart bits fell
to the hard cold frozen ground
where the cold kept them safe
but then there was a boy who
began to pick them up from the ground
and held them tightly though the
pieces were sharp then there was another
boy  who picked up the pieces too
two boys picking up the pieces of one girls broken heart
each piece individual and unique and so unlike the rest
one offered his heart after the other and the girl now has to choose
which part of her heart she wants to live with forever
*Fiction*
Apr 2015 · 745
Shut Up And Tell The Truth
Kitts Apr 2015
Stop it...
Just stop it...
I love you
You drive me INSANE
You tell me all these
Flat out stupid reasons
How it would be "Reasonable"
For me to dump you...
Do you want me to go?
If you do just say so...
Out the door I'll go
I'll leave you alone
But this constant talk about
Why and how you would understand
If I left you and found someone new
The last guy who did this to me
I dumped in a cruel way...
So shut up and tell the truth
Do you even want me to stay...
Apr 2015 · 652
Just Watch Me
Kitts Apr 2015
Watch the blood hit the floor  
As I don't care anymore  
I gave you my very life  
You cut me with my own knife  
Just watch as I bleed out  
If I lived would you pout?  
You took what was left of my dreams  
No, nothing is what it seems    
Why did I let you in?  
why did I let you hurt me again?  
You aren't worth this pain  
As I stand here bleeding in the rain  
Just watch as the anger burns in me  
As the beast comes out in me  
With my back against the wall  
You're the one who's going to fall  
I made the mistake of trusting you  
Now that you've hurt me we're through  
No, I won't die, won't go to hell tonight  
I won't go without a fight, I'm going to burn out bright  
Just watch as I bleed because it's the last thing you'll ever see  
Watch as the anger to live takes over me
Apr 2015 · 712
Knife To Wrist
Kitts Apr 2015
Sitting on the ground
Sobbing without a sound
Wicked black blade to slender pale tan wrist
Long brown hair
Tears running down her still child like cheeks
Black shirt
Black skirt
Hand trembling as she tries to take her own life

Go on!

Do it!

No one cares!

Not about you!

Ugly!

Stupid!

Slow!

No one loves you!

Cut it already!

Chicken!

The sobs become louder, more frantic
As she tries to take her own life

the voices cheer her on
Taunt her, tease her, cut her

The laughter of the other children
Echoes in her small ears

The fights of her mom and
New boyfriend flash in her mind

The sting of the willow branch across her bare back

Girls running circles around her making fun of the way she talked

Boys laughing, throwing rocks, breaking her things
And laughing as she cried

So here she is on the ground in the corner of the schoolyard
Ready to slice her veins, to watch her life drain

Finally a still small voice, just a tiny whisper
Made it through the rest and somehow through all the noise
The little girl heard it say...
Someone out there loves you...
the little girl dropped the black knife
And jumped to her feet
Ashamed that she had almost excepted defeat
Apr 2015 · 2.0k
The Girl Hunter
Kitts Apr 2015
Light weight, black glossy, perfection
You must hold such a weapon with confidence
Slender black arrows with green feathers
Bundled in the fine homemade black leather quiver
The silver steel tips made to ****
Sunlight playing peak a boo
With the shadows all around you
The ancient trees look down upon you
The wind picks up and gently plays with your hair
You breathe in the familiar smell
Of the ancient forest you call home
You haven't caught an a-wi in days
What will the hungry little ones do?
You see a flash of movement and you freeze
Draw a single arrow from the quiver on your back
Without a sound you take your position
Silently with practiced ease you aim and fire
You hear the death cry of the animal you have shot
Swiftly you run to were the cry came
There lays the plumpest most beautiful a-wi you have seen in moons
Thanking the a-wi with the words you were taught as a child
"Thank you dear sister/brother for giving your life so that my family could continue to live theirs"
With the sacred whisper you end the a-wi's pain with a quick slice from your blade
Smiling and whispering you’re thanks to the Great Spirit
You run as fast as you can to get the villages warrior braves
You are small but you are part of the Tsa-la-gi
Therefore you are never alone
Apr 2015 · 351
Lay Me Down
Kitts Apr 2015
Lay me down to sleep
Ignore the way I weep
And when you realize that I'm dead
Don't let the pain go to your head
Remember how I used to be
Or better yet forget all about me
Don't let me cross your mind
Don't remember when I was kind
Forget the way I kissed
And let it be said "She won't be missed"
Just burn my body and bury the ash
Save yourself from wasting your first love; Cash
I know you will forget all about me
As soon as the life leaves this pale, scared body
Apr 2015 · 576
Live!!! Live!!! Live!!!
Kitts Apr 2015
Gray flesh sown and stitched to blue flesh
Staples reflect the silvery moonlight
The professor scurries about like a crab around the massive human-like Creature on the cold metal slab
The monster isn't alive, not yet anyway
The professor is hurrying now
To make sure everything is perfect before the time comes
Wires and cables run from the monsters flesh to an assortment of Machines that whirl and flash with color
The machines look like monsters themselves, far more scary then the one on the operating table...
The professor, my master, says that this HAS to work...
I do not doubt my masters genius
But I fear the monster I helped him build
From bodies we stole from the morgue where the professor works
He says that if it works he will make more
I do not understand how the machines, lighting and moonlight and all that complicated things work
My mind is too simple for such things
I simply serve my master and do what he asks
The monster will be my masters greatest achievement
The greatest achievement science has ever seen!
I know I won't be remembered, my role is too simple for that
It will not be written down how I cut up those smelly corpses
And sown the dead flesh together to make something new
It will not be written how cold it is to sleep on the uneven castle floor With no more then straw and a moth eaten blanket for warmth
No, it will not be written down that I was the one to pull the switch
No, I will not be remembered but the monster will be
The monster my master would not have been able to create without me
Me, his faithful servant
Me, his pitiful slave
Me, the sower of flesh and assistant of a mad man
A crazed genius, with skin as white as paper
And cold as ice, how my masters eyes almost glow as the time draws near
There is not trace of fear on my masters white face
With a wild grin that reveals his crooked tombstone like teeth
He commands me to do what all the others before me were born to do
I reach out my green/grayish hand and...
Obey... I pull the black cold lever with the red *** on top

The artificial lighting flashes!
The moonlight quivers!
The machines scream as if alive, as if in pain!

The monster writhes and convulses with life
Suddenly as if someone had turned a switch everything dies
The machines the artificial lighting even the moonlight is gone
Pure darkness, solid almost tangible blackness
And just as quickly as it had left all the light and noise came back
And there strapped to the cold metal slab
The monster lay still
The defeat,
The utter hopelessness,
The grief that now was etched so deeply in my beloved masters pale face broke my simple heart
And as I was about to take a step towards my master
Something, I don't know what made me look towards the monster

The monster opened his eyes...
Apr 2015 · 870
Hero Syndrome
Kitts Apr 2015
I'll protect you,
Do what ever I have to do
To make you smile, to make you happy
I'll save you  from everything
I'll buy you whatever you want
Because your love is all I want
Please, just smile my way
I'll pick up the pieces of your broken heart
I promise, baby, we'll never be apart
I'll be your hero
I swear I'll never leave, no, won't ever go
Baby, I'll never hurt you
Not if I can help it, I promise my words will always be true
I hate to see you mad
And it **** me seeing you sad
So, please don't cry
Let me in, I want to be your guy
I know you say "We'll always be be friends"
But is that where our story ends?
So when you're wanting to go
Think of my hero syndrome before you let your true colors show
You're my damsel in distress
My Meg to my Hercules, I don't care if you owe the devil
Every encounter I'll level
I want to be your hero
But you don't need to be saved, but I can't walk away, no
I have this urge to save you
And you tell me that's not something I need to do
I see you in pain
And it drives me insane
You want to save yourself, you want to be strong
But how can I see you struggle on this road so long?
I want to save you
But you say that I'm just another boy with hero syndrome, how can I just be another guy?
Have they ever wanted to stop the tears you cry?
You laugh in my face
And when you run I can't help but give chase
I want to be your hero
But you tell me to just walk away, to just go
You try to tell me you're trying to save me from who you are
But I love you so much, I don't care about what you've done or how far you've gone
I'll join the crowd of the boys who love you
I'll be there when the rest of them don't come through
Girl, I want to be your hero
And I'm making no plans to go
Dedicated to Cory
Apr 2015 · 763
Cursed Beast
Kitts Apr 2015
My hunger grows day after day
All boys should stay far away
Or I'll rip open their chest;
Take their heart and leave the rest
Even though I hunger and thirst for love
I am but a raven acting like a dove
For behind this oh so,"pretty," mask
Is a monster who has only one task
To rip open, break apart and devour
The hearts of boys who do not cower
For where my own heart once did beat
Lies that which several boys did defeat
And though the pieces lay true to form
My broken pieces will never again reform
I am the one monster, the only blue beast
On which little boys hearts, loves to feast
I sound and look like a victim:You are the prey
But the prey never listens to what predators say
I long for someone to break the spell, this curse...
  
  
  
But Who Could Ever Love A Beast?
Apr 2015 · 593
Look Up And See
Kitts Apr 2015
Just look up and this is what you'll see
Me swinging gently from our favorite tree
So you once said it'd be forever, and ever
But what you really meant was never, never
You left me so crippled and so very broken
Took the cornerstone of my heart as a token
All I wanted was your black and twisted heart
All I received was my small world torn apart
Now here I hang, waiting for forever and ever
Might as well've been the one pulling the lever
How useless i have become, how can I ever forget?
I happen to be broken, I haven't forgotten you yet
Was it something in your stormy blue/gray eyes?
Or in the way you caught me in your web of lies?
The lies that you hung me with and now I swing
Forever doomed to love the boy who is my suffering
Kitts Apr 2015
It's always in my dreams that you slap and hit me around
It's always in my dreams that I'm a little girl again
Helping her bleeding Mom off the ground
It's only in the night that I remember being
So tiny and to just live was a huge fight
I remember crying as my great aunt washed the lashes on my back
The way the blood swirled in the clear water of the bath tub
The lashes coming from the fishing pole that had met
My flesh during your drunken attack, How it hurt...
I ran into you the other day at the store in broad day light
And no matter how big I get you will always scare me in a fundamental way
I never backed down from you and I never will, no not ever
I will always remember the bruises you left on me
We still have the scars you left, me and my family
I remember the hatred that would flow through my little body
Because my Mom wouldn't tell anybody
They like to tell me that you have changed your ways
That you're better then you were back in those days
But people like you never change that much
Because I remember your fierce anger,  your hurtful touch
I am full of hate for you, and I wish to forget every memory
But I haven't, no not yet... I wish I could
My nightmares are memories of you
True Story
Apr 2015 · 1.3k
Endless Nightmares
Kitts Apr 2015
A black fist
Rough hands
The smell of alcohol
Smoke in your lungs
And in your mouth
Tears don't stop the pain
Welts and bruises are the evidence
But no one looks, nor cares
Who notices what is hidden well...
Apr 2015 · 1.5k
Queen of Mistakes
Kitts Apr 2015
Back and forth gently she sways
Many masks around her at the end of the day
Tears fall slowly from her sad brown eyes
Her nervously bitten lips red from her lies
Aimlessly wondering from place to place
She's always hiding her sad but true face
Scared,and always alone she does go
No one to cares to really ever know
What does this strange girl hide
In who does such a strange girl confide?
Diamond tears fall from her sad eyes,
But she never lets anyone come close
She is truly horrid at telling lies
Her secrets no living body will know
Her heart is an ocean of secrets and tears
There has never been anyone who knows her fears
Those who get close to her always end up hurt
And for those who reach towards the fire gets burnt
Back and forth, from lonely place to lonely place
She moves aimlessly, always hiding her real face
Drowning on land in her own ocean of mistakes
What kind of hero will ever have what it takes
To rescue the hopeless and lonely Queen of Mistakes
Alone she rules the Island of Mistakes and regrets
She's set up her palace that to her no body gets
They all get close but the doors always closed
They won't love her if they get glimpse of her real face
But so many are willing to give a good chase
Kitts Apr 2015
A porcupine doesn't have many friends
Due to the needles that stand up at the ends
No one really cares when a porcupine cries
No one is there to weep when one of us dies
No one ever approaches a hurt, sad porcupine
Can't even attract a drunk with a case of wine
No one wants to get close enough to start to care
No one, for a small porcupine, is ever there
Tears fall down their cute, small needled faces
No one ever pays any attention to their small cases
From place to place, we porcupines wander so slow
There isn't a warm welcome at any place we go
Seems like porcupines just can't please anyone
Apr 2015 · 1.5k
Unbreakable Above The Clouds
Kitts Apr 2015
Behind her back they call her cold,
But death has taken hold
And they whisper that she hasn't a soul,
But they can't see the huge gaping hole  
Where her heart's supposed to be
She cut it out herself, she's tired of misery
She finally put her heart away
Saving her blood for a worthy day
Son, run as fast you can,
Because she isn't the one for you man
Her fire will burn you alive
Her words hurt worse then a knife
She walls are so **** high
Not even angels fly that high, don't sigh
She may cry herself to sleep at night,
But don't trust her, don't try to make it right
For the battle she fights is one inside
It's with her own demons she's trying so hard to hide
Not even the bravest can handle her at her worst
And fragile egos around her spontaneously burst
No one can ever find a way to her hidden heart
The Minotaur in the labyrinth always tears them apart
So high above the clouds, she only seldomly calls down
When she does they always trick her into coming to the ground
Where they cut into her chest trying to find her heart
Then the monster she becomes rips them all apart
For she's girl as well as a beast
Apr 2015 · 538
You Have No Right
Kitts Apr 2015
You have no right
To know who I hold at night

You Have no right to tell me you still care
For you are never even there

I know you are with her now
So forgive me if I do not bow

I won't tell you that I love you
Because I am done with you two

So please don't come crawling back to me
I won't take part in that form of misery

I'm getting over you a little everyday
Forgive me if I no longer care for a word you say

I might not say those three words out loud
But who can blame me? I've fallen from loves cloud

I have loved you more then you'll ever know
But I have to, need to let you go
Apr 2015 · 707
Vampire Sisters
Kitts Apr 2015
We seem fall in love but never can seem to just stay
We try to give our all but only give the worst away
We try to convince everyone that we are totally sane
All the while hating the taste of hatred and blame
We shudder, sigh and moan so under the body of a lover
But we are feminine variety of a simple gypsy slaver
We are the ones in control, your body and your soul
We break stallions when they are but a gentle wee Foal
We gypsy girls  only charge one simple easy to pay toll
We want control, we want the control, we want all the control
Be yourself we won't change you, just make you want to change
We will kiss you softly to numb the pain while our sisters
With their needle like fangs litter your body with pale blisters
Blood thirst, the steamy way of seduction is our disarming tool
With the lack of blood flowing to your head, you become our fool
Your mind will weaken with a daily overdose of physical bliss
Together we are what the succubus of the night creates, huh, sis?
Apr 2015 · 964
I Used To Believe
Kitts Apr 2015
I** used to have so much faith
I  used to believe love would last
But now all I know is that love
Can be over so very fast
  
I have loved so many boys and men
But never has it lasted for very long
Either my feelings fade or theirs do
Either way love has done nothing but wrong
  
I hope to someday find a reason
To believe in love again
But until that day comes my way
I believe saying pointless "I love you"s" a sin
Apr 2015 · 1.9k
Dream Native
Kitts Apr 2015
I dream of the perfect
Man of Native blood
With hair to his shoulders
And skin tan as natural leather

I thought he didn't exist
Until I met him in a store
He was my dream man
Everything I ever wanted

I know only of his heritage
For that is what we discussed
We talked about tradition
And how most of it is lost

He kept my focus which is hard to do
He made me feel accepted,
Which is even a harder feat
With his Native looks and attitude

I couldn't help but fall a little
But it was just a conversation
About Native American things
And whole lot of talk about archery

I hope the world ends someday
So that I can go to the blue mountains
And find my native man
He made a promise that few would make to a stranger

He promised if the world ended
Like we both know it will
He would meet me in the Blue Mountains
And make sure I'd survive

Who makes a promise like that anyway?
Certainty not anyone I know
For everyone cares about themselves
And forget the unmade friend..
Wrote this about a Stranger I met in a store...
Apr 2015 · 1.1k
Honor Of The Great Nephilim
Kitts Apr 2015
There is a war we wage on God
When the heavens open up, his angels fall
Down to the ground at the end of our feet
Giving death to all that oppose the great Nephilim
Even Lucifer himself wishes to topple us with sending his demons
We just laugh at their pathetic attempts
Crawling up our legs like little ants till we just flick them away

The ground littered with a mix of crushed bones and mud made of blood
Blood flowed faster then wine from a Nephilim clay urn
Demon blood and angel blood mixed with human blood
All under the disproving glare of their God
War was the way of life for Nephilim, Humans, Demons and Angels
Godly and ungodly armor covered their rotting corpses on the battlefield called earth

As others fought a war, we played
Played with the bodies like children
Thinking nothing could ever stop our might
But what happened next not even the great thinkers could imagine
Watching as the sky weeped with water down onto the earth
Hearing screams echo across the land with my only thought being “how desperate can God be?

In all the history of man there was never rain
The Nephilim had never known rain either until that day
But neither did the demons and the angels
When the first drops fell the fighting stopped
the screams of panic rang out from all of the beings on earth
Forty days and forty nights the rains fell on earth

Many of lives were lost, but not all
Demons still continued their ongoing sins
Matting with humans to create more Nephilims
That was till an agreement was met between God and Lucifer
Locking away all those that dare touch the human females
All the remaining Nephilims fell to deaths hands
The mighty abominations finally died off
Killed from the fear that we put into Gods eyes

Humans soon forgot about the Nephilims and their ways
But humans forget a lot of things...
It did not help that the angels destroyed what evidence there was left
And history by word of mouth is bound to become just myth, just legend
But the bible of the christians still talk about the people
Born of demons and humans, the heros that are forgotten
I wrote this with a friend...
Kitts Apr 2015
You tell me you adore me
You tell me that then you ignore me
You play these games with my head
You do these things that make me feel dead
You are beyond any kind of repair
You are the poster boy of the guy who doesn't care

Once I adored you so much
Once I ached physically for your touch
Once I did, I swear I did but not anymore
Once again I am done playing life's *****
Once more listen to me and what I have to say
Once upon a time is not the way we begin our day

It's over I can't say it enough
It's no longer strong or tough
It's no longer what we had
It's not like you want me so bad
It's like this... You are never there
It's like when I try to talk you just sit and stare

All you do is say you're sorry and that it won't happen again
All you do is lie to my face and turn around and behind my back you sin
All I want to do is stab you in the face repetitively with a rusty blade
All for nothing... The NOTHING you do, so sleep in the bed you've made
All I wanted was for you to take the time to notice me
All you ever do is make me bleed tears of remorse, so let me be

Let me be free of the things you used to do
Let the person you used to be come back to be true
Let me go if you can't change from this creature you've become
Let it change before the damage is done, before it can't be undone
Let me turn my back on you for the last time
Let me let you pay for your hundredth crime

For the last time... Good Bye

© 2015 Kitts
Apr 2015 · 317
My New Secret Place
Kitts Apr 2015
I'm running away
Hopefully here I stay

Not sure if I will
But I'll give this a try still

I'm not that good
Don't even care if I should

I needed a new home
Needed a new roof, a new dome

So I say hello to you
I hope my poems don't make you blue


© 2015 Kitts

— The End —