you showed me
that even though
my sky is dark,
there are still
stars

and now that
you are gone,
they are going out
one by one

I SHOULD NOT
FEEL GUILTY
FOR SNAPPING
TWIGS
WITH HESITATION
WHILE YOU
CRUSH BONES
WITH EASE

you showed me
that you can still pick a scab
off of a scar

you were made of stars;
im honored you tore me apart.

cold hands
around my throat
dragging me under

i hold my breath
and clench my sheets
as if they were
an anchor

but when the wave hits
i am always swept away

i deserved the
whole universe
and you wouldnt
even give me
a single star

she is nothing like you
but then again neither was i
and i am thankful for that

why rot in hell
when you can rot anywhere

save the heat
for warming your bones
after the flesh has decayed

i never realized
that cutting you out of me
would mean
ripping my whole body apart

you planted your roots
in my veins
and tangled your stem
within my stomach

leaves are curling
out from under my fingernails
and petals are sprouting
from my scalp

i am vomiting up your flowers
and they are
the same shade as your eyes

midnight fireflies;
kisses gone up in smoke

the day she turned lesbian for her best friend,
and the first time he cut himself

the kids will raise their bottles,
and their parents will raise their fists

they will turn the dial on the stereo
until their eardrums burst,
or their fingertips break

all of these
masks
look down
on me,
and they
do not like
what they see

for what use
is a puppet
that broke free
of its strings
if it can
no longer stand?

i sometimes hope
that i plague your mind
as often as you take over my own

because you are the only
consistent thought i have

and though youve become
more like a stain than a memory

ill never wash myself again
as long as your imprint
remains on my body

youve taken my place
in the back of his mustang,
but i hope you find
a strand of my hair
on the floorboards

you are standing
right in front of me

but your gaze
shows that you are
honestly
thousands of miles away

like the rings of
saturn
you spin in endless
circles

and catch up to me
every so often
but then continue on
within your orbit

i slept inside of your ribcage
until you purposefully broke all of your ribs

you threw yourself down the stairs
and didnt cry until i disappeared

i tried to repair your broken bones
but all i had to my name was some dental floss

now my teeth are rotting out of my skull
because i stitched you back together

you have your hand on my curtains
you wont let the light in

the only thing in my medicine cabinet is cough drops
maybe i should take all of them

you filled my bathtub with sand
and hid my dogs leash

you washed all of my clothes
and wasted all of my bleach

every utensil in my drawer has turned to plastic
and the channels on tv have all turned to static

so i sit in the corner and hold my breath
but you wont allow anything
to bring along my death

you tried to repair
the home we made,
but every stair
buckled under your weight,
and every wall
peeled at your touch

every word you speak of me
is mixed with poison,
but you created it
with your own tongue

i said id never
rip you apart,
but that was
before
you turned me
into a monster.

im cold
inside and out,
but at least
i wont get
burned

you have all of me
and you will not
accept
what i have
given you,
but you will not
give it
back,
either

i feel so
heavy

every thought
is another
weight
on my shoulders

it is only a
matter
of time

before i am
pushed
down
into the
darkness