The remnants of your influence
Echo down the halls of my concience
Long after I slipped away into the night
Here you are still
Whispering that I am not good enough
I cannot make on on my own

I told you I was a mess
You begged me to let you inside
So buckle up baby
And enjoy the ride

I am trying to blend,
In a word filled with the opressed,
Distressed, and self-obsessed.
It leaves me a little depressed.

Authenticity is hard to come by.
Everyone is medicated.
Facades often created.
The fakery I have always hated.

I don’t belong.
All they see is skin.
Doesn’t matter what’s within.
Could care less where I’ve been.

Show me something below the surface.
Give me something more.
Let your feelings out til’ your throat is sore.
Be real, that’s all I ask for.

And through the pain
I’ll find my voice
Turning this quiet violence
Into loud words

I am not my past
I am not my disorder
I am not my obsessions
I am not a victim

I am strong
I am smart
I am brave
I am free

She writes so for one brief moment
Someone somewhere understands
And in that moment
Neither the reader or the poet
Are alone and misunderstood

They take and take with no thought of giving
Leave you in the shadows, barely living

Drain your soul; leave you with scars
Then wonder why you don't reach for the stars

They continue to judge without any care
Then label you broken beyond repair

They ignore your struggles and trivialize your pain
Then wonder why you can't break the chains

Don't let their darkness consume your light
Don't let their words dim your inner sight

You are strong, you are resilient
Your spirit is unbreakable and brilliant

So let them talk, let them judge
They cannot fathom the strength you've trudged

And when they ask why you are so dark
Show them your light and leave your mark

As for my family
We like our drinks strong
Our whiskey neat
Our tequila straight
And our women silent

I am learning to love again
This stranger that is myself