A veces la vida es mucho mejor cuando usted no sabe nada mejor, y lecciones dolorosas de toda la vida no ha desgarró usted corazón abierto..

I feel thoughts
Discussing,
Struggling,
Fighting,
Screaming,
Shouting,
within my brain...
An endless war,
The lank bloodshed...

You are all words and no action
Never meaning things you said
Empty threats and endless pain
Screaming through my skull
Into the recesses of my mind.

Don't moan his loss
For the things unseen
Far surpasses this
Celebrate his gain
For all he's done we will miss
He will never be forgotten
While he lives in our hearts
The angel he is and was

The stars have forsaken me
My love,
Will you do the same

The sun has long taken departure
It's me that I blame

My rights have long written away
In those others name's

My love is all I've left to offer
You,
My only claim.

too much has passed
too many regrets and memories
but there were those times
you made it all worth it
you made my whole life
a new dimension

It was never a conscious decision
Yet i walked into my own deceit
As though it was only a stroll
Regretting only after the mistake
Why do we ambush ourselves
Why do we fall for our lies
Why are we our very victims
Why is this riddle endless
When will we solve this quest
How can we cure the wounds
This very self inflicted agony

Love is the drug we take
Turning our lives into a disaster
Addictions are uncontrollable
They never make you happy
Forever
They never stay the same
Forever
Suffer the consequences
Of choices you make
Of mistakes you make

I see you in bikes on the street,
I see you in my bed.
I see you when I fall asleep,
Babe, you live in my head.

I see you when I'm lonely,
I see you when I smile.
I see you when the sun's shining,
Babe, you walk me through every mile.

I see you while I read,
I see you while I'm down.
I see you while I'm losing sleep,
Babe, you light up this town.

I see you in these night lights,
I see you in the sky.
I see you when planes take flight,
Babe, you kept me alive.

June will kiss you and spell the extent of your beauty.

July will ******* senseless and leave you with a wailing heart.

August will pick up your broken pieces only to get cut.

September will brutally bruise you and jeer at your absurd fragility.

January will snap you in half and watch as you scream and cry on the floor.

February will be an ocean of self destruction, washing over you and gently cradling you in it’s arms.

March is broken records all over your apartment floor and getting wasted at ten in the morning.

April is blood in the sink, crying yourself to sleep, shaky hands and breaking down everywhere you go.

May is a storm forming in your eyes when you realize that you need to save yourself, because you stopped loving yourself for to long, and they stopped loving you too.

When they tell you that wounds will heal, you know that its all a lie.

No bandage could cover the wounds.
No love could cure this heart.
The world has not technically stopped.

But it has, down deep, inside of me.
A flame has been extinguished,
My voice, left incapable.

Each muscle, each breathe.
Lapsed into a numbness so ******.
My heart beats, against the walls encasing it.

Holding it there, steadily,
in case it tries to break free.
Like the caged animal it is.

The throbbing in my veins.
The pounding beats of my heart.
So powerful they invade my thoughts.

Hijacking the only thing I have control over.
The only thing I have left.
But they're unceremonious murderers,
Entrapped, could defeat.

painted for me
a picture you laughed at
a house on fire
forcing me to call it home

locked in there alone
i tried to scream
no sound came
for my breath was stolen

only now i realize
i'm not sorry anymore
you stopped me
from burning my wrist

only to do it yourself
a scorching stake
deep in my heart amplified
deep in my life

This is such a place of agony.
Why is everyone so angry?
I wish fists would stop clenching.
"Hate" should have no meaning,
Nor voice.

If the Devil were real,
He would be too powerful.
Fed with our anger
And this endless rage.

We could have been so much
So much more peaceful,
So much better.
Why did we have to start a war?

If only the people could smile
From deep in their souls.
If only darkness did not leak
From the corners of all our hearts.

If only smiles rang true true,
And demons stayed under beds;
Out of our lives and our days,
Out of all our minds.

If God does not smite you down,
The world will.
we should've understood definitions.
"Human" is not a compliment or gift.
Humanity is the curse,
and it's closing in.

There's a devil in each of us,
And an angel lives there too.

I saw the angel inside me,
Begging in tears to be set free.

But the devil stepped up,
shutting her up for so long.

I almost forgot her plea,
So I carved to set her free.

No one did understand,
How much this meant to me.

They stopped me for good,
Which stopped me from good.

It's been too long since then,
When i last saw her,
I'm afraid they killed the angel in me...

behind this elaborate facade
i am unravelling
ripping at the seams
crumbling down
like a house of cards
still none wakes up

every choice is a unmendable mistake
every day is governed by fate
every soul is glass delicate
every smile is fake

inside our minds ourselves we fight
inside our dreams we take flight
inside our lives stories we write
inside our heart is fright

I sense you feral presence
Hidden in my very essence
The foreboding calm before
The storm in my every pore

In the midst of word she was trying to say,
In the midst of her laughter and glee,
She had softly and suddenly vanished away ---
For the Snark was a Boojum, you see.

A torn, blue dress,
Body of straw.
Stitches apart,
As they pick and claw.

Once beautiful,
Now all but gore.
Her prince led astray,
Broken Elder lore.

No faerie godmother,
But a trickster.
Smile broken and chapped,
No chance of a lover.

She missed the deadline,
As it struck ten.
Thought she had 'til twelve,
But her house morphed into a den.

Her eyes turned to buttons on their own,
Face contorted into a scowl.
She cried out as her heart turned to stone,
As the faerie took her soul.

We all had to pay the toll,
For no one heard her screams.
Wreaking havoc on us humans,
Deceiving our dreams.

love is like a broken thread
beads of water rolling off
a once beautiful band ruined
ripped to nothing like before
never a chance to hold back
to rewind the past written
carved into every droplet
falling off our cheekbones

...
...
...
                                                     ­                     you never saw me
finding comfort in liqueur
nicotine
and your empty promises

                                                       ­                   a walking hurricane

vengeance and fury
my niche
love was weakness

                                                       ­                    the things brewing under

ruthless sphere's of words piercing
you
                                                    ­                       like a crack of lightning
never knew you feared thunder
my pretense
                                                        ­                   till my skies turned
grey
                                                     ­                      a color you created
                                                         ­                  i became
the storm
                                                           ­                your fears
                                                           ­                your torrent of bad dreams

Innocence is not ignorance
Innocence is more than naivety
Innocence is the moment
When two souls collide
And you feel
A warmth
So deep
You know you will never be alone
Again

They were children tasting sugar
For the first time
Without all the artificial layers
The raw sweetness
Making them gasp and shiver
Anticipating for more
Turning them into wild animals
Ravaging its meal
Showing their true identities
Buried in these colors

Moving in sync with the others
An unspoken dance of grace
Gasps of breath fogging
Tongues seeking out new territories

Beyond written promises
We spoke a thousand words
In the silence we wrote
Documenting our mutual stories

Weaving a web of secrets
Melting into each other arms
Burned in our memories
This eternal unbreakable flame

I am here
Though i am gone
Just a shell
Empty and souless
I listen to you
Without hearing
I look past
Not really seeing
Fearing feelings
I never dared to feel

This is a fabricated
Fairytale
Our days tumbled dry
Laundry
Those memories a draught
In our city
I am but cracked china
Ruined

I could've sworn you knew
When I met you, that day
Fidgeting with my sleeves
Arms scarred, a battlefield
Tears unshed for which I bled
Crimson, ounces I swear
So many words unsaid
Yet you still, left me alone
Nothing but much less
A crumbled heap, torn petals
Not worth an ounce of taffy
Still I needed you with me
Or at least whats left, my ashes
My soul, written on my epitaphy

Why, why me? But
I slept, ate and swam
Eight months. Make it nine
In your extremely ****** up
*****. The hell, you said
I could be sold, for cash.
He said no, then why did he
Go around. No business
******* people, with a family
Back waiting. My loss
They say. But still I'm considered
Lucky, now with them.
I want to say, sure as hell
You never know. There ain't
No difference.  No
Ain't an ounce.

Words, thoughts, like chords;
Sewn, printed, onto paper.
Works, strewn, unwanted;
Taken to ground like ashes.
Owners forgotten, children;
Stained, broken, like old dolls.
Worn, exhausted, crippled;
All to become their elders.

the instant our eyes met,
i felt an unspoken understanding.
my heart ever so silently,
made a promise never to leave you.
i'm withering by the second,
every moment without you by me.
only reason my heart beats,
is to keep up to the rhythm of yours.
please don't leave or say no,
your existence in my life is my elixir.
it's you that keeps me alive,
for you are the last breath within me.

Friends, lovers, mothers, love;
the things i've never understood.

My life a pool of now murky water;
it's beauty i've never seen.

The fear of experiencing this pain;
a damp blocking out all's true and good.

I wallow in my endless fears,
terror and melancholy awaits in tomorrow.

The beat the momentum
of my heart
their urgently ringing conversations.

My mind empty as vacuum
yet brimming
with fears and unsolvable problems.

This machine is not who me
as humans
we all have our own certain limits.

People never remember history
choose not to
they keep pushing though i'm broken.

They never seem to realise even
when i'm long gone.

Just looking at her with pure sincerity,
now that she knows;
I wished she'd like me for me.

But the disgust in her eyes,
told me otherwise.

It was another start of one of my fears,
mercilessly coming true;
nothing i could do to amend.

The things i never did.

Standing stock still as your eyes
bored into mine.
Ambivalent of whether i should
stay here or leave.
Ignorant about the situation
i have been in.
Screaming in my blank face
i'm just hopeless.
Tears remain unshed inside,
i broke apart.
Watching you feed the flames,
i stepped right in.
the moment i was engulfed i knew
that i was home.

Sneaking in silently,
whispering
secrets and conspiracies.

This is a puzzle,
scattered by
your thoughtless actions.

Voice still as stone,
I am held
prisoner of my mind.

The hands around my throat,
are not your's
but my very own.

My hands trembled,
looking at
how bleak my world seemed.

I looked down to see
a red line,
running down my arm.

Closing my eyes,
swallowing the same pills
for what i hoped was the last time.

My hope of eternal sleep,
eroding as i awoke
dizzy and empty of all things.

Maybe i killed her,
or maybe
I killed me.

The skies cloud over,
the smell of thunder taints the air,
and the rain begins to fall
from my eyes.

There's a book of poetry
in the lines of my hands,
that no one wants to read.

I've lived my life,
rooted in her darkness,
arms catatonic as a tree.

Unable to run or cry,
when her other prunes my flowers.

Se soltanto per un attimo
potessi averti accanto.

Forse non ti direi niente.
ma guardo solo ,
da vedere ...

Petals flew through the wind
among the overcrowded
morning sky.

Patches of clouds splashed
onto the canvas
that’s my sky.

A seemingly perfect picture
really broken pieces
of glass shards.

It is not
a good idea.

But

This is not
a cliche.

Truth

I’m pulling
no prank.

Please

I mean it
free me.

People never realize,
Or recognize,
The touch of a broken soul.

The despondence,
Fear and need,
Skilfully masked beneath.

Pain never shows,
On their poker faces.
How battered they still fight,
Still live.

I blew smoke into your face,
You smiled laughing it off.
I didn't understand how you did it,
Neither did you for me.
Two individuals living it,
The life we both feared.
We looked so different,
You exhilarating but broken.
We looked so different,
Me cheerful but insecure.
We hide the parts we deem,
Are the most unbearable.
We show the parts we deem,
Are most socially accepted.
Two of us so different,
But truth to be are the same.

You seemed so distant,
I was so scared.
You have no idea,
What's in my past.
The scars I've collected,
Pain ingrained in me.
I try to break free,
To recreate this piece.
But it's not possible,
Just like fate.
So i just hurt and fear,
Yet again that you'll leave.

I tried but never realized how hard normalcy could be.
Sitting among the others tourist or people one and all.
I pretend I’m fine and say hi but really I’m not even the least.
Meals are never just meals to me so as apply for the rest.
Trips with my family feel like torture but they are not wrong.
I put this mask on and blame others for hurting me.
Turning it all inwards I craft the scars on my limbs my story.
Every time I think things are gonna be different this time.
I am forever disappointed because I never change myself.
This impassible task is my mission in life to recreate.
To make things just a little better for me and everyone.

The dark has always been part of me,
it still is
and forever will be.
I try to break free of its touch,
Only to
Realize its me.
I am the daekness which lives within me,
We are one
Its true all can see.

I starred,
more through you than at you.
My eyes,
vacant as a desert.

You took,
my hand and whispered in.
My ears,
its alright it'll be fine.

I tried,
to come back to the present.
To you,
me and everything real.

But still,
I linger in between.
A place,
None can fathom or see.

Scientists have discoverd
the same flexibiliy in thoughts
that leads to creativity;
can also lead in some individuals
to mental illness.

I silently paryed
You would see me,
The fear and torment
Reciding in me.
As my arms
Wrapped you in an embrace,
Wishing you could
Eternally keep me safe.

Sitting here in the ruins of my life,
the future i foresee;
A chequerboard of black and white,
no middle ground to be.

These questions and expectations,
surround me like the seas;
I'm lost with no lighthouse in sight,
no one will hear my pleas.

I need to know what I've done wrong,
so i can hide the flaws;
Without locking down my whole soul,
closed up behind these walls.

I'm not a ship on the ocean,
but a shipwreck beneath;
i'm not a man on the tower,
but one who's off the cliff.

we always see her
but never beyond her mask
hiding all her feelings
know you won't even try to ask

lying all the time
this whole life is a charade
no one knows how broken
she is behind this strong facade

that permanent smile
makes us all believe she's fine
clueless that her pain
she masks in laughter drowns in wine

thinks she has it all
for they only see her best
not knowing how she tries
she's never good enough to rest