Forty seven coloured leaves
have fallen from the tree.
Some were green,
some are gold,
each one of them is me.

She knew where she was going,
she knew where she had been
and all that time
when she was young,
she knew she was still green.

Add all the springs
and all the falls,
the winters that have past.
This leaf of gold is 47
and she is ageing fast.

Kaydee.

Can't sleep for thinkin'
Can't wake for drinkin'
this place that I live in
to expensive to be in.

I tried just a taste
but that wasn't enough.
If I don't stop it now
I'll be back livin' rough.

Over populated streets at night.
For a doorway to sleep in
I'll have to fight and
hide under a blanket
until it gets light.

and repeat verse 3

Kaydee.

Ashes to ashes
dust to . . .
Sorry,
I didn't hear you scratching
but
I did hear your voice.

I looked into your eyes.
Nothing.
I tried your pulse.
Nothing.
There was no heartbeat.
Nothing,
but I did hear your voice.

I love you too.
Rest in peace.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Amazing how their memory fades.
Leaving victims, in their hands
the bloodied blades.
Amazing how they forget their ills.
In the hands of the dead,
a bottle of pills.
Sitting red faced yet silent at the wake.
Lies a blue faced victim
of the life you did take.

In violence
you used your hands for years.
In desperation
they used their hands one time.

Is this how you imagined
you'd pay for your crime.

Poetry by Kaydee.

She's a new born under
protective cover,
with a shield like no other from her
umbilical Mother.
Covered from head to toe by the
artists jacket.
In clear polythene for you to admire,
not attack it.
Or the mobster paid in Lira to stop
anyone going near her,
when all that she needs
is the unconditional love
from the bosum that
feeds her.

Poetry by Kaydee.

(Part 1, The Engagement)

Draw blood, draw blood for me.
Not with a crayon, do it with a knife.
Show me that you mean it, you need me in your life.
Tell me that you love me and need me always near.
Surrender all suggestion, your purpose and your fear.

(Part 2, The Controller)

Why, that's a lovely dress but why you wear it here?
I'm sitting with friends, we're trying to have a beer.
You make me ******* mental and I know, you know!
Now ring a ******* taxi, get in it and just go!

(Part 3, The Victim)

Hey baby baby, I missed you so tonight.
You know how I hate it when we
fight.
You don't know why you make me mad
and then you'll cry like I've done
bad.
You need to work out what you
want
but don't dare tell me that we're through.
I haven't done a single thing and all
this **** is down to you.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Tomorrow.
Wait until tomorrow.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
A better morning.
Afternoon.
Evening.

Tomorrow.
Wait until tomorrow.
Tomorrow will be a better day.
A better morning.
Afternoon.
Evening.

and repeat.

and repeat.

You're trouble, you're toil.
Yes, trouble and toil.
With you I think I'll bring to the boil.
A pinch of salt and a teaspoon of oil
but not too much, your taste it'll spoil.

I'll take off your beard.
To eat that would be weird.
But gristle that makes your knees
into crackling . . .
. . . oh yes please.

With mint sauce on each cheek,
two kebabs that are seekh.
Not keen on the chin
so I hope you don't mind,
that goes straight in the bin.

Chop, chew, swallow and digest.
Can you guess which part
of you I like best?
It's your nose that I grate
all around the edge of my plate
and because I've asked "Please"
that you try not to sneeze.
It makes a much better garnish
than parmesan cheese.

Savoury poetry by Kaydee.

What would I do without you.
You're always by my side.
Giving my life balance.
You open doors for me.
Point things out to me.
You're always right
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
and (then) left.
. . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . .

Kaydee

Upon finding
I am burdened
with this
glorious purpose
came the stark
realisation
that I must
one day
triumph or fail
and with that,
I awoke.

Kaydee.

Then,
with dice in our pockets
and places to see.
Hope in our hearts,
a bright future forsee.

Rock paper scissors,
agreement was made.
We'd ride on the bus
to play games in arcade.

In the ponds and the bogs,
There were tadpoles and frogs.
By the bushes and thicket,
we'd play football or cricket.

With time on our hands,
like a slowing of sands.
A keeper we'd pick
with a showing of hands.

Playing until too dark to see,
only then would we return
for tea.

Now,
With mercury fillings
and gaps in our teeth.
Saving what money
to spend on a wreath.

Kaydee.

He was warm
and shone bright like a son.
She was cold like a moon
and he knew he had to die that night
to make way for her.

Without regret.

Kaydee.

The opening night,
in front of packed house.
The story, a fight,
between a cat and a mouse.
The cat with her guile and
the mouse, all the while.
Powers up a ******' chainsaw
with a knowing wry smile.

So never bet against the mouse
with either money or your house
because the crafty **** takers
have slashed the odds at bookmakers
as to what's in the pies
at the new high street bakers.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Am I really that uncouth?
Have you lot yet worked out the truth.
The **** I write, it's so contrite.
I know you're dim
but I thought you might.
I've been feeding bananas to you all.
Big bananas, none are small.
All are bent, of course they are.
Enough's enough, it's gone too far.

Dear Voyeurs, to all my fans.
Some ride cycles, some drive vans.
for M&Y, yeah you're the guy.
So I bait my line and continue the lie.
But let's have it right, as well I might.
You wanted to play,
so pretended you're gay.
Now most I know aren't,
but one or two do.

Boiler repair guy with the twinkly eye.
Bent over in two, I spank with a shoe.
And all that he asks is, I call him Sue.
So I have him pegged,
for that's what he begged.
But now he knocks on my door
wanting much more.

******' Big Bent Bananas
by Kaydee.

(slurp, slurp)

The bones of the
not yet murdered,
hurriedly re-dressed
by the hands of the guilty.
Creating a cloak of invisibility
that no one can see.

Whispered words of
the guilty liars,
drowned in their own
breathy stench.
To conceal the truth
that no one can hear.

Words once tearfully written
still undiscovered.
(for time cannot heal)
that only I can feel.

The reaper knocks,
One, two, three
and I ask he call again.
Maybe tomorrow,
but I don't know why.

Poetry by Kaydee.

When we first met you re-lit the flame inside my heart.
You gave me a need to survive and I never thought we'd part.
But this world is too ugly for me
to bear
and I don't want you to think that I didn't care.
So I wrote you this poem to explain to you why.
It wasn't anything you did and I don't want you to cry.
I'm sure you'll find a new home to stay where they'll give you your
food and a place to play.
Finally, try not to **** too many birds or you and I will be having words.
I'll be watching you from in the skies and every time it rains, that'll be the tears falling from my eyes.

Love from Mummy.

Poetry by Kaydee.

I write about death.
My art depicts death.
My life is about death.
Maybe for me life is death,
. . .    . . .    . . .
or on my death, I will find life.

Poetry by Kaydee

Wear your muzzle
and do not protest!
Attendance with others
will end in arrest.
So, keep your mouth shut
and toe our line,
Failure to do so will end
in a fine.

Your freedom is gone
for you're just a pawn.
In this game we play,
human rights are withdrawn.

Predictively programmed
your mind now is ours.
You entered a ballot,
relinquished your powers.

When all said and done
this is your own fault.
Industrial complex,
I dare you revolt.

Kaydee.

The head fuckery of societies rules.
The indoctrination in our schools
has led to the homeless on our streets while politicians count their seats.
The privileged few, too rich to mention
fail to reveal their true intention.

The NHS setup to break by psychopaths all on the take.
Big business stripped of all its gold,
no pension funds left for the old.
Big pharma, they don't miss a trick,
they're making you & I feel sick.
They push the pills that ring the tills
even though they know it kills.

With the best advice and greatest will
our kids are on **** & fentanyl.
While we're divided black & white,
we'd never stand up to their might
So take your neighbour, hold their hand and together we'll reclaim our land.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Where is it that you find your wonder?
'neath the rainclouds with pitchfork
collecting lightning,
in thunder?
******* is king,
Ecstasy queen.
Phet is my thing
with morning caffeine.
Six days and five nights,
the things that I've seen.
The rabbits and spiders
in the *** noodle canteen.

Where is it that you find your wonder?
'neath the sun with secateurs
collecting the fruits
of agriculture.
Health is king,
love is queen.
In this new life,
sober this spring.

Poetry by Kaydee.

D                 is for dying
      i got tired of trying.
U                 is for upset
         but I couldn't cry.
S            is for sleeping
      in darkness i trust.
T          for triumphant
        now that i'm dust.

Angels with torches lighting my way
down grand, windowed hallways
I'll walk down one day.
With framed, pictured memories
highlighting my past.
Flickering candles,
a shadow I cast.
All the while,
wondering why I am here.
This is the story of my yesteryear.
I suddenly realise that this is the end.
A man holds his hand out
and says
"Welcome my friend"

Poetry by Kaydee.

Nothing lost is something won
in that awkward moment
between birth and death.

Kaydee

At Prophets gate
in front of a jury.
Cannot be judged when
we have the same story.

Defined by our actions
yet separated by thought.
The battle lines drawn
based on **** we were taught.

The matrix created,
money to be made.
Dependent on memory,
reflected in grade.

Well how did you do
with the lessons you had?
Did you repeat the mistakes
of your Mum and your Dad?

So who is at fault?
We're all pawns in a game,
consuming their poison
for fortune and fame.

and now that it's over,
here is your prize!
That's right,
you get **** all
'cause everyone dies.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Time to leave these ******* behind
and delete them all from my mind.
All had gone except for one.
He was the worst for hanging on.
He should have been just like the rest,
who didn't like how I was dressed.
Not to mention my high heeled shoes,
well I don't care, It's them who lose.
I'll need to find a brand new friend,
not like these who all pretend.
One who'd say "I don't care, do what you do.
I'll put the kettle on, you fancy a brew?"

I don't know about heaven
but angels, I do.
They've sent along an invite.
So go along, I might.

I hope to see the fireworks
and you enjoy the show.

A burning red, remembering
the venomous words you said.

A calming green, reminding
you of what could have been.

A cold and sombre blue, dead
thanks to you.
***

Poetry by Kaydee.

You won't change me
to suit your views.
It cannot be,
you'll always lose.

Your thoughts,
your chants.
For redefining,
I'll still repel
when I'm flat lining.

Under the birthstones
in the carcass yard
is where the flesh tombs lie.
Decomposing for three long years.
Eradicating memories,
dreams and fears.
Becoming next, the black gloop
treacle of putrification.
Now bones, just old bones
is the remain of what was once,
a spirit with a name.

Poetry by Kaydee.

For all we know
we'll meet again.
The in between,
not now or then.
If I go first
I'll wait for you.
Your guiding light
to see you through.
I'll hold your hand
when you are sad.
I'll cry for you
throughout the bad.
I love you now
like I loved you then.
I'll still love you
when we meet again.

Poetry by Kaydee.

One. Death
Spending a lifetime
before the big reveal.
Though constantly decaying
we still cannot (skin) peel.
Held captive in our own flesh tomb
we wait for a sign saying
'Mortuary Room'

Two. Birth
You've served your time,
you're free to go.
Oh yeah it's your (death) day,
that's just so you know.
But didn't I die
or was that just a lie?
Next you'll tell me I'm conscious
and that I can fly.

Three. Life
You're free.
Go fly!

Poetry by Kaydee

Kiss my bloodied lips before you go.
Remember darling, you reap what you sow.
I gave you that warning a few years ago.
So what's coming to you, you already know.
Now close your eyes and hold on tight.
I'll make it quick when I put out your light.
When you are gone, I might shed some tears.
Remembering back, we had some good years.
You chose a new ally, you made a mistake.
It won't take you long to realise he's fake.

Poetry by Kaydee

Then comes the danger,
pretends it's a friend.
Infamous liars,
ultimate desires.
Intoxication
and the ******' rest.

Hours and hours
to be the best.
A balance to be re-dressed.
The best ******' dancer,
******' chancer.
Don't get ****** . .
. in
sin
sin
Good luck!

Kaydee.

You're just above the water, just.
You know you're going, don't you.
You've hung on for ages, years.
You seem ok about going, are you.

Just go, now.
Just go.
Go.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Hello's come and go
but goodbye's stay forever.
So,
I'll never say hello again.
So,
We can't be together.

Poetry by Kaydee.

We're not all chicken heads Sister.
Just a piece of **** meat
to another ******' Mister.
I wear my knickers with pride
and not now, not ever,
will I have hide.
I'll walk tall in my heels
and not under red.
I sleep kissed in satin,
not prepared to give head.

So if you want some excitement
in your life,
drive back home Sweetie,
make up with your Wife.

Poetry by Kaydee.

In my mind I have a hive
where a million bees live and thrive.
The killer bees have left, they've gone
I have no need, what's done is done.

The honey bees, that now I keep
so sickly sweet, they let me sleep.
The bees and I now live as one,
they'll follow me when I am gone.

Each one of them and from above
a little sting, from me with love.
So sickly sweet into your mind,
memories of me are all you'll find.

So every day that you live on,
equal days that I am gone.
See, suddenly it all made sense,
A life of pain,
your recompense.

Poetry by Kaydee

I don't have much but I have hope.
I promise, I have hope.
Cross my heart and hope to die.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Please accept this receipt
as my proof of purchase.
I'm returning the Police
'cause they're not fit for purpose.
My bike it was stolen
I'd said who and where.
The Police didn't bother
It's like they don't care.
Well they've sent me a summons
because of non payment.
Now it's four times the cost
and a bike that I've lost.

I'll glue on a moustache
and wear a **** hat.
Eat sprinkled donuts,
do **** all
and get fat.

and that's how I became a pig.

Kaydee
(ner ner, ner ner)

"I'm not hungry" she said.
"Let's both get undressed
and go straight to bed".
Her eyes peer down,
I've read that look.
She's hungry only
that we ****.
Both twisted, posed,
improbable feats.
Entangled, stuck in
satin sheets.
Back arched from touch,
sensual caress.
Opening of *****,
a fingers press.
A wanting tongue,
it reads her look.
A throbbing gland,
throes north and stuck.
Perspiring writhe,
one, two, we slide.
Enchanted throws,
"oh God" she cried.
Seismic shudders,
twisted face.
One final cry,
a tired embrace.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Yes I am ace, do you know what I mean?
I need to be out there, I want to be seen.
I have done before and I may do again.
I can't say who with nor can I say when.
Now click on the heart,
say you like my feed.
Though needing you more,
you're more than I need.

Poetry by Kaydee.

I am analogue.
made of troughs and of peaks.
My medication offers
silence with tweaks.
I'm upping and downing,
either dreaming or drowning.
So I can't stay too long
in case something goes wrong.

First thought of the day
is of impending doom.
Rain clouds have gathered
and it pours in my room.

Later on that day,
I feel I'm okay
and I don't know why but
. . . . . I'll take it.

Poetry by Kaydee.

You stopped to say hey,
but then you must,
you were with friends
so you just,
what?
You must what?

We chatted before,
no friends,
lust?
What?
You lust what?

You can't be true to you!
So what of me?
Disgust or lust?

Poetry by Kaydee.

It's watching over you, my love.
and you
you fear nothing
more than
me.

and you
ought to wonder.
For the fake love and
the feelings that you plunder.

For I am the rain,
I am the clouds
and
I am the thunder.

Can you feel it?
I am electric!
I am me
and I am you.

Kaydee.

One day you phone
and all you'll hear,
a dialling tone.
Next time you call,
the battery is dead.
I'm unconscious,
plastic bag on my head.

Was it something you said?
One more thing before I'm dead
and I'm thinking . . .
as I lie . . .
as I bleed . . .
"What size screwdriver do you need?"

I forgot how to cry.
Like the porcelain doll
in a white summer dress.
But just like it, I couldn't care less

Nor could I care more,
It was just too much.

My once teary eyes were useless.
My mind was blind.
Until I learned to love a little deeper.

I would never find, . . .
. . . me.

Poetry by Kaydee.

Sorry I couldn't wrap it,
it's still warm and wet.
I thought you should have it
in case you ever forget.

Kaydee.

You turned so cold,
I thought you'd died.

Though your footprints
I could not find.

I followed to where
I thought you, I'd find.

But my mistake,
for with your love
I had gone blind.

And now I'll never know
If it was I . . . . . .

. . . . . you were ever meant to find.

Poetry by Kaydee.

To die is to understand
the cards you were dealt
and the cards in your hand.

You may question the journey
all the way through,
no matter the trauma

What makes you
IS YOU.

Take a pop,
Sling a shot,
Marble in a hole.
These are games
we used to play.
All strikers
scoring goals.

Now we're all
just goalkeepers
trying to save it all.
Hold on to things
we never had
without dropping
the ball.

Poetry by Kaydee.