12/9/2021

Sitting in this parking lot, the blasting sirens wail outside,
I watch the flashing clouds, the spreading lightning,
I feel the pulling wind, the pressing sky,
I watch the empty streets, the waving trees,
I hear it raining on my roof, the crickets in December,
And I really hope I’m not an idiot, sitting in this parking lot.

you,
who acquire a very delicate heart
was hurt too many times
that you don’t feel pain anymore.

you,
who became numb of all things
has finally found everything tedious
and live in absolute indifference.

for you,
the world only holds the color
of black and white,
even with no shade of grey
or everything in between.

tt has become a part of who you are,
in solitude, utter numbness, apathetic

empty.
nothing.

No.
That’s all i need to say to make something stop
Why care for the things that once mattered in the past
When the ones that mattered in the past didn’t come to last
Honestly, it ***** to ****
We live this life with no breaks nor shortcuts
Suicide is simply an illogical solution
Doing so would diminish my own resolution
I’m growing tired and brittle
I may not be old but i’m hollow
No, not to be edgy in any matter
I wouldn’t care if you went and bantar
If you view me having the lack to emotion
Somewhat of a form of entertainment
I wouldn’t blame you
I invite you to do it
Know that I’ll give no reinvigoration
For your own amusement.