The stranger in the bus..man in the black suit..who I seemed to know since ages now.. The man with a diminished smile, seemed like he had a taxing day to cuss..
We shared a bond of more smiles and stares and less words spared.. But in his eyes, he had the world locked like the pandora..
To open it was calamity, and to keep it all in was fatality.. but he was brave, went on burning his soul in the fire of the heist..
I always wanted to ask him about his plied, but I was scared of the explosion, he might endure his own Big Bang..
This stranger in the bus, the man in the black suit, who I seemed to know since ages now, was inordinately restless today. And I couldn’t guess why..
Flicking his fingers, frantic and hasty.. Teary eyes, who was once my persona for strength, put me to deep thought..
Deciding to trade a word today, this harmless stranger extends a clumsy mind, oh how he is like mine.. the trouble was little to wild,.. He was lost in his story.. and I was compelled to listen, pay attention.. because this man that I seemed to know since ages now, was peculiarly blue..
They said talking helped, but we shared more smiles, words lesser spared.. The lump in his throat did most of the work..
While I got lost in his unshared troubles, i learnt something tonight..
Melting cold nights, rumbling leaves at the height. Such loneliness and abandonment and the hurt that is caused, is all a game of our own minds.. they tell us of our existence, of the blood and flesh and the running emotions.. which would never loose weight.
And the stranger in the bus, the man in the black suit, who I seemed to know since ages now..
I finally sense him now. He held my hand, asked me one simple question.
"Why do we wimp ? Why are there storms and tempests inside our tiny hearts? Why do we feel wounded by the mighty loneliness ?"
How smoothly he filled all the blanks. The blanks inside my gut. The blanks inside me head in a rut. The blank in my existence. In my excitement.
I see the man in the black suit everyday now. In the mirror, in my thoughts, in my walk and talk and mindful tirades.
The stranger in the bus, the man in the black suit, who I seemed to know since ages now, is inside me.. he replaced my loneliness. After all, consciousness is a mystery less..
And now we look out the window together, and smile more often.. the storms seem sorted now and bitchy loneliness sits beside me, not inside me..
For the stranger in the bus, the man in the black suit, who I seemed to know since ages now, has taken shelter, camped in the void that was inside time..
i Thought the fields were on fire until you Reminded me thAt it was just dawn
you took me to your graNdparents' farm so i could ride horseS again
it had been a very, very long time
but i remembered theIr bodies as much as my own
and you were good
The animals knew you like a god
all bent and hIdden in the light
we didn't get hOme till late
your parents were asleep, they left dinner iN the refridgerAtor
it was the only ilLumination in the entire house
i saw you in the faint, shadowy glow
the walls of her fortress
dripping with sage
empty of rage
her gut, a tortured field
truth lies there
while battles were waged
kitchen of flowers
table a maze
lovers look across
not knowing each's gaze
moments of crime
within the lives of the "normals"
they laughed as they lay
bedridden with sex, long slow daze
south fly the geese, crows never go away
the sparrow calls morning
the owl flies today
blocks of comfort, boxed and weighed.
August burned slow
The sun clung to every branch, every petal
To every moment left in this old life
I couldn't hold on to each ray
Each moment, each day
None of the moments I stood in would stay
They lived in a leaving town
And all the little homes had locked up their doors
These moments were fleeting
And held grace in their hands
They tried to make her mine
But she had places to be that weren't me
The sun started setting
And the sky peeled back my pieces
Like the skin of something sweet
Falling like ash around my feet
August had burned up
And so did everything after
The moment I broke
Quick and then slow
Merciless and then cruel
When I could not stand up for myself
And you did not either
When I realised I could not do it all alone
And people started leaving
When I needed a way out
Not knowing where the exit was
When I needed peace and silence
And you kept disturbing it
When I needed a parent
And you told me about your father
When I took some time to reflect
And you thought I could handle you
It was when you grabbed my arm
And I wanted you to let go
It was when you let me go
And then you let me go again
Quick and then slow
Merciless and then cruel
I am at the edge of tears and edge of darkness and edge of greatness
So much heart, compassion, and love and possibility
Surrounding me and in me
Ready to let go of my old self concept
Standing at the edge of the cliff of the new me
THE EDGE IS HERE
The edge is in the space between
The edge is hope, creation, and possibility
It is the void
The beauty that lies within us all
It takes courage to stay here
It’s easy to step off