They leapt at her,
Crept inside her mind and
Altered her thoughts.
They intervened with her emotions,
Caused her to imagine new worlds
Of which she was not a part.
They scared her
And with her rope of ignorance,
She strangled the words.

Aim for the history book,
Not the magazine.
Be remembered for good,
Not for bad.
Do what you want,
And want what you do.
Make sure people will remember you.

You can change the world,
You just have to believe,
That you are the one,
Who can end poverty.
Be the change you want to see,
Do it all with grace.
Make the world a better place.

Ignore all the insults,
Trust the compliments.
Stay by your family,
Despite the arguments.
Friends will come and go
But family’s forever.
Don’t give up. Never.

The people you miss,
Will be known to you until
The day you die.
If they’re in your head,
They are never dead.
For you keep them alive.
New people will always arrive.

Aim for the history book,
Not the magazine.
For in the end you’ll see,
Success is your ambition,
Never dream of fame.
The answer lies in your heart,
Even if you don’t know how to start.

Do not weep for the events that will come.
Treasure past memories, but do not fret.
All that matters is the moment.
All that matters is now.
What are you currently doing?
Sitting on a bus?
Reading a book?
Watching television?
Whatever it is, just stop and think for a minute.
When did you last thank someone?
When did you last tell her you loved her?
These are the things you should be thinking about.
It doesn't matter what you look like,
It doesn't matter what grades you're getting.
It doesn't matter whether you get that job or not.
All that matters is now.
Your friends, your family, your love.
They are all that will ever matter.
Are you making enough time for them?
Just forget about everything else.
Forget about it all apart from love.
The extent of your love is the extent of you.
Love everyone.
And be kind.
Because that is all that matters.
Love is all that matters.

There is a certain comfort in anonymity,
The ability to disguise ourselves as no-one.
But this disguise becomes too real,
Reality and fantasy reverse:
We are no-one,
Our disguise is now the person
We once were.
There is no desperation in regaining our
Identity.
Are we too scared to be someone? To have meaning?
Willingly we discard our existence and
Replace it with nothing.
We are nothing.
Nothing.

there are spaceships above the new york skyline
and the news says they are stealing the stars.
i'm trying to fight them baby
i'm trying to save the stars that you gave me.
but i think it might be too late.
did you already take them back from me?
because i can't find them.
the sky is empty of your love-
only your hatred is left
in the form of spaceships above the new york skyline.
it was you who started the attack
wasn't it?
please stop stealing my stars baby.
they're all i have left of you.

A year ago today I woke up.
And for the first time in years
The sun rose,
Its rays blinding me,
Not with helplessness
But with hope.
I stretched and the sadness slipped away
As the anxiety evaporated in the morning heat.

A year ago today I saw the world for the first time
All its bright lights and smiling faces.
I saw how wonderful it was to be alive.
I stood in the centre of the world
Consuming the beauty,
Breathing in the wonder.
To think I could've stayed asleep
And been oblivious to this place.

A year ago today I breathed a sigh of relief.
It had gone.
There was no longer a black hole within my heart,
Destroying my happiness.

Oh my god it is wonderful to be alive.

A year ago today I woke up.
And I smiled.
It was over at last.

How do I balance
Loving you
And not loving you?
The scales always tip one way
Or the other.
I can't maintain equilibrium.
I'm not even sure if I want to?

at first i saw only your petals,
a deep red blanket of acceptance
and i fell into you longingly.
it was a bed of comfort
that i had not felt before.
and for a few moments it lasted;
i felt your love
and i gave you mine.
but i fell through the petals
and became tangled
in the thorns of your true self.
you did not love me.
you needed to feel loved
and i was the only one
foolish enough to fall.
i am a fool.
i was terrified of you
and i did not leave.
you destroyed me.
with each thorn
you pricked my heart
and out seeped the
blood of my broken soul.
your kisses were not love,
they were saliva and teeth and passion.
desperation.
you never ******* loved me.
you used me
you forced me
you tricked me
and i believed you
with all my trusting naivety.

your petals withered
and died
and now you weep.
you tell them it is my fault.
all i ever did was trust you.
i saw your beautiful petals,
to me, they promised an escape.
but instead you offered me entrapment
amidst the thorns of your madness.
you are the one who killed my spirit
yet you act like i created sadness.
your tears are nothing
more than the guilt inside
the ruins of your mind.

you cry because you need attention.
do not be fooled:
attention is not love.
you crave pity
but no-one will give it to you because
you ******* killed me.

you ******* killed me.
i should be the one who cries.
i had the courage to escape your prison
but do not mistake that for the end of love.
it is you who ended the love
long before it even began.
you hid your thorns
you flaunted your petals
you tricked me
you lied to me
and it ******* killed me.
you ******* killed me.

why do you get to cry
when all you cry for is attention.
why must i cry in silence?
why must i cry alone?
when it is me who is hurting
because it is me who was blooming with love.

STOP

please don't hide your thorns for the next girl.
be your petals.

With black leaves and black clocks,
I fall and drift as the time I forgot
Spirals beneath me,
A whirlpool dragging me
Down, down, down.
It dirties my soul with every turn,
Blackens the lessons that I learn,
Removes my life that means nothing now.
Away I travel.
Exploring the world with a sense of unknown,
Pitter-pattering on the edge of reason.
My doom is inevitable.
It is imminent.
It is lonely.
Alone, alone I press on.
I take back the black of the leaves and the clocks,
And slow the seconds in the time I forgot.
It is now.

we are just two broken shadows
clinging to each other
desperate to love and be loved
we find solace in one another
equally hurt and destroyed
we have both witnessed the destruction of our own hearts
seen them obliterated into thousands of pieces
littering our souls with pain
but together we will survive.
i love you

i find it funny
that you think everyone
is bulletproof
when i know you
would shatter
like glass
at the slightest touch

You shine through the darkness,
A single flame in a sea of emptiness.
I am drawn to you,
Captivated by your secret beauty.
Wonder seeps through your every aspect,
An air of mystery surrounds you.
I watch from afar,
Observing your every emotion.
Hope emits from your presence,
A faith so strong it overwhelms nature.
Suddenly you go out.
And once again I am
Lost
In this
Sea of emptiness.

The rain falls,
Endlessly tumbling from frangible wisps of love.
Each droplet touches my bare skin with delicacy,
Pirouetting as they engulf the intricate curves of my naked figure.
I dance in the downpour,
Absorbing the joy as I watch the sorrow deliquesce.
It is beautiful.

She scrapes her scalp with the metal teeth
That promised to bring her beauty,
Then destroys
Each ringlet of pulchritude with burning tongues of fakery.
She slaps orange liquid on to her pale face,
Desperately disguising every perfect imperfection.
Darkening her sight and reddening her speech,
She puts up the barriers to prevent
Her emotions from revealing themselves.
Squeezing into pieces of bright cloth that accentuate her figure,
She smiles at her superficial curves.
Staring vainly into the mirror,
She grins.
Because she no longer resembles herself.

the tears are flowing
and i don't know if i am
happy or sad.
is my heart seeping through my shattered soul?
or is my joy leaking from the corners of my smile?
am i on top of the world?
or beneath it?
am i empty?
or bursting with emotion?
i never know whether my soul
is grinning or weeping.
are the tears
happy?
or
sad?

You beg me to reply
But I can't see the keyboard
Through my tears:
They have blurred my vision.
A puddle forms at my desk;
A multitude of guilt and sadness
Flowing endlessly from my pained eyes.
I wish I had the ability to disguise
Myself like others
And pretend that I'm okay-
Smile like I'm fine and
Shrug the pain away.
But I do not have the strength
For you have broken me.
So, for now you'll have to be patient-
Maybe forget about me?

I have run out of words.
They no longer flow from my fingertips,
No more do they glint in the light of your sight.
The letters that once formulated on my lips and kissed you
Have gone.
You say words are beautiful
But I have none.
Where does that place my beauty?
Share your letters with me?
And I will create new words for us to be.

everything is beautiful
and nobody is happy.
the earth hurtles round the sun
just for us
and we still complain
that nothing goes right for us.
the chances of us existing
were so minuscule
but we are here now.
isn't that amazing?
and didn't anyone ever tell you?
we have superpowers.
the power to love
the power to laugh
the power to save.
you are a superhero
merely because you are living.
recognise the beauty of the universe
and be happy

because i love you.

Every word of yours
Is like a knife penetrating my fragile skin.
And as my blood pours from the wounds you created,
I lie.
I lie to you
Because it is easier to hurt me than it is to hurt
You.
Beautiful, beautiful you.
The words leave your mouth with good intentions but
By the time they reach my delicate ear they are plagued with pain,
The pain of your love.
It is unbearable.
You see that you're hurting me but
I smile
That fake smile that I have become so accustomed to.
I reassure you,
Sugar-coating my comfort with little stars that formulate into kisses on          your sweet lips.
I am fine.
I am fine.
I am fine.

How can the beautiful think they are failing?
How can the most wonderful people be so
oblivious to their beauty?
Do they have glasses through which
Only lies can be seen?
Has sadness become a veil
Across their vision,
Obstructing the light of brilliance?
Are their mirrors laced with despair
So that their reflection is disfigured with doubt?
Or does society just fail those who are full of wonder and magic?

You are not failing.
Society is failing you.

I am falling
(for you)
Far too fast.
Every word,
Every touch
Makes me want
To dance
To spin
To leap
Into everything.
But I'm scared
You'll disappear
And I'll continue
To fall.
But without you
To catch me
What will happen?
I am falling
Far too fast.

But baby it is wonderful.

Everything is okay
And then
"I miss you" she says
And your heart disintegrates
Into a thousand tiny pieces
Of forgotten love,
Pumping around your body,
Poisoning you with pain you once felt,
Causing everything to stop.
You stutter
And gasp
As her beauty destroys you.
Then she looks at you,
Her bright blue eyes stare into you
And then everything is gone.
You are over.

my head hurts.
your love is pounding against my thoughts.
the whispers seep out of my skull
like the secrets that were hidden for far too long.
it's beautiful in a way,
the pain that your happiness has caused me.
how lucky i am to have been hurt by your smile.

My heart leapt
But my soul fell
Into an eternal abyss.
Further and further away
From light,
From hope,
From love.
I am empty and alone,
Unwanted and abandoned.
I am drowning,
Struggling to reach the surface.
Still there is a smile:
A pretence,
A façade.
My soul still falls
But my heart continues.

I held him as he cried himself to sleep,
The tears of his past trickling through my bones,
My comfort merely a sieve
For his liquid sorrow.

life was so dull
until she swept in,
a beautiful hurricane,
rendering me speechless
with her love and kindness.
oh god, she was so kind.
her heart beat for everyone else,
not an inch of her soul
belonged to her.
she was one of those people
who you could just trust.
you could look into her eyes
and you knew everything would be okay.
she saved my life
and so many others
in so many ways.
i owe her everything
but i'm too scared
to tell her
how much she means to me.

i
love
you

She doesn't care where she ends up.
She just keeps on going.
Hiding away until she reaches
What she came for.
A smile plastered to her worn face,
Hiding the pain
Of growing up too fast.
More mature than her age.
Her laugh hides an injured soul,
Within her eyes
A sense of longing.
Terrible beauty
Hiding
Deep within her

Leaves tumble to the ground,
As if surrendering.
They fall softly,
Scarcely louder than silence.
As they drift the wind decides where to take them,
It whistles and blows,
Separating clusters.
Now there is a carpet of leaves,
Laid out especially
for her.
She finds delight as they crunch under her naked feet.
Destruction pleases her.
The leaves that were once high above everything else
Are now crushed
Beneath her.
She indulges herself in the knowledge that she has reduced the highest to
Nothing.

he was the kind of person who spoke so beautifully that you wanted to write down his every word
and instead of oxygen, he breathed in stars, lighting up the universe with the supernovas he exhaled.
his laughter was the question i wanted to spend my whole life answering and i knew i would never tire of searching.
some people aren't just people, but a place - a whole world.
he was the kind of person you could live in for the rest of your life.

i am not strong enough
to bear the weight of your gaze.
i will crumble under your touch
as you shoot me
with your heartbeat bullets.
one word from you
will burn my soul
and i cannot
put up a barrier against the pain
any more
because you already destroyed it.
one of your beautiful kisses
will poison me
and the antidote i used before
no longer functions  
because you took everything from me.
i am not strong enough
to cope with your love.

and then you were gone.
you rushed into my past,
tearing through my heart as you went.
you littered my soul with the shreds of love,
each one piercing me
with such force that i swear
the world ripped open.
now there is a rift inside me-
you forgot to close it when you rushed into my past.
it's pulling me in,
i'm folding in on myself baby.
i'm imploding.
maybe this is how it was always meant to end:
not with an explosion;
i didn't go out with a bang
or even a light.
i ended with an implosion.
how pathetic.

Your skin emblazed on mine
Gardens of the night reach out to us
And I can’t escape the time
That I was free.
Floating away from the stars that call to you
They were never enough
Inadequacy surrounds my every move
And wishful thinking never got us anywhere
The clouds of surrender were always ephemeral.
Acatalepsy pulled at my heart
Until it dragged you away.
You could never see the beauty
Always inimical to the epoch of our lives.
Did it ever mean anything to you? The veracity of the vitality of life.

on the other side of my screen
there is a sad boy,
his heart broken by a beautiful flower
with dangerous roots.
he covers his eyes,
keeping his tears in the shadows,
hiding them from those he loves.
he is strong and brave and wonderful.
but he doesn't realise.
he paints himself the colour of sadness
yet it fails to disguise the brightness in his soul.
he is in a sea of people
but he stands out,
his kindness and love
so high compared to everyone else's.
he is the most beautiful boy.
one day he will realise.

A child smiles
At the smallest of things:
The way a bird flies,
The beat of its wings.
A rich autumn's breeze,
A cold winter's day,
The summer's green trees,
When spring comes to stay.
A dark empty night,
A white moon's face,
Stars shining bright,
A wonderful place.
A room filled with love,
Surrounded by laughing,
The thought of above,
Acceptance, no asking.
But then we grow up
And we smile no more.
We don't want to be us,
Nothing at all.
Don't lose your dreams,
Don't lose your smile.
Always believe.
Be your inner-child.

every human being is an island.
so little on the surface
compared to the wonder beneath.
we present only what we wish others to know,
the superficiality consuming humanity.
nobody will ever know what is truly inside
and this is okay
according to society.

but i say **** society.
true contentment resides within our heart
and we must let others reach inside
and with their love guide
us up to the surface
so that our island represents
all of us.
and not just the façade.

the world is at its end.
no more smiles, laughs, cries.
we are all attached to social media,
our life source no longer love, but wifi.
no-one lives in the moment.
no-one cares about a ******* thing.
mechanic children forced through the system,
lost to generations of futile fear.
rich kids now the underprivileged, deprived of happiness.
the poorest are the happiest.
equality is a long lost concept.
crime and violence rule our lands.
never again will a child love,
always will the sadness seep
through the veins of the long forgotten warriors;
the musicians, the actors, the artists, the authors.
their blood runs cold,
never reaching the hearts of the disenchanted young.
creativity has gone.
we are all the same,
ruined by obsession, greed, hunger, power.
we even look the same:
grey hair, paper skin, tired eyes.
these are the marks of destruction.
we have all been taken over
by the recklessness of our hatred
and the poverty of our love.

inside
there is a deep sadness.
you let it in when you ripped
my heart open.
it swarmed to the
open wound.
don't worry,
my heart is fixed now.
she glued it back together
with her love.
do you realise that she spends
her whole life
tidying up after you?
the thing is:
when she closed my heart
she forgot to remove
the sadness from inside.
so now it's trapped.
and it's trying to escape.
my heart is bursting at the seems
as it fights against the muscular walls.
it's going to break free
any moment now.
and the tears will pour.
make sure you don't have a broken heart
or it will come to you next.

i used to believe
that the sun rose
and the sun set
and the moon came out
and the moon hid
and that was it.
but you showed me that the sun
dances around the earth
before showing its beautiful colours
and saying goodnight.
and the moon shines bright
just for us,
so we can gaze into each other.

i used to believe that seasons turned
and the leaf fell from the tree
and that was it,
but you make the leaves flutter,
i see now that they don't fall-
they fly!
then take their place upon the autumn carpet
that will lead me to you.

i used to believe that everything just happened.
trees grew and withered,
humans existed and died
and that was it.
but trees don't just grow, they flourish
and humans live forever.

i used to believe that there was no reason for anything,
but now i see that
the whole world turns for us.

there you are again:
headphones in,
staring at the floor,
the whole universe pouring out of your gaze.
did you really think nobody would notice?
you are trying to block out the world
but it will never work
because the stars that brought us together
will always let me in.

i am trying so hard to help you
but what was once love
is now an abyss of sorrow
and all that now grows there are the black petals of your resentment.
you have built you walls so high
that not even i can climb them.
but i will find a way
no matter how much the weapons of your anger **** me.

you cannot shut yourself away forever.
i will always be able to find you
because the wonder you gave me
always leads me back to you.

i wonder if we would spend afternoons in the sun drinking whiskey and reading poetry together.
i wonder if he would talk to me like i was the only star in the universe.
i wonder if we would lie on my bedroom floor listening to the clash and the who and gaze into each other's eyes.
i wonder if he would read plato as i slept and wake me up with little snippets of his mind.
i wonder if we would fall in love and get married or if we 'weren't that kind of couple'.
i wonder if we would travel the world together like we always dreamed.
i wonder if we would have gone on long walks down by the river planning our future together.
i wonder what would have happened if i'd met him first.

words protect us.
they shelter us from the storm of life.
they wrap themselves around us,
engulfing our every movement.
whether they are sung or spoken or written,
words have power.
more power than you could ever imagine.
they can hurt.
your words can cause torrential downpours
in the hearts of others.
but kind words are just as powerful.
they can inspire.
your words can achieve someone's dream.
why would you choose harmful words when your kind sentences can change the world?

I wake to see my tear-stained pillow.
It looks at me with pure menace,
Replicating the hatred I have for myself
For hurting you.
Last night is a blur
Of desperation,
Longing,
Conflict.
Why is it that making you happy makes me
Sad?
Last night we
Spoke about
Nothing.
But it spiralled into everything
Without any effort at all.
I am too dysfunctional to continue.
And this morning you'd written a poem
About how you're too sad to write.
Can I have damaged you that much?
That it has prevented you from
Writing?
Oh how you love to write.
It is writing that unites us.
Have I broken you
So much that the link between us is also
Broken?
My tear-stained pillow smothers me with the memories of last night.
It is over now.
I am over.
I am gone.

My poisonous lips lock
With his beauty,
I restrain the tears-
Imprisoning them behind bars of a happy façade.
But they are not criminals.
It is my smile that is guilty.
I utter the three words he wants to hear
And smile
While my heart writhes
In pain
As I lie.

little lightning bolts
shoot down my spine
whenever you talk.
you brighten my day
with every touch.
every embrace
brings me up
from the dark place;
the one i'm starting to visit
less and less.
i thought he had
locked me there forever
but suddenly you came
with the key
to my happiness.
and now whenever i see you
little lightning bolts
brighten up my life.