When the band stops to  play
and the music is all done,
When the story's nearly over
and we watch the setting sun.

When the heroes return home
and peace restored,
When all the birds have flown
and their cries are no more.

That's when you'll know,
you're in the epilogue.

When her love goes cold
and the days grow short.
When your hope is no more
and your dreams hit the floor.

When the adventure is over
and the beauty is faded
When she only speaks to you
in dreams that are jaded.

When the pain in your heart
Finally stops to smart

That's when you know
you're in the epilogue.

6 months since we parted
26 weeks

So much has past, and so much has happened.
So many days missing you, trying to fill the void with whatever I could.
Though Business mostly.

I gave you my word I would wait 6 months before opening my heart again, 6 months for myself to heal
For you to heal
And to honor you and respect you.

But now that commitment has ended and yet I feel as I did when I first began it.
My heart is full, my wounds have healed, yet as the dust settles, emotions

Last December I was madly in love with you,
And this December finds me in a strangely similar place,
Strange what can happen in merely a year.
Strange how things can change so quickly and everything can be so different in just one year.

I'm happy on my own, while reminiscent of the days gone by
You reinvented love for me, you showed me depth and grace and truth. And I'll hold on to those lessons for ever.
How can one let such wonderful memories go?

I may never see you again, and that thought haunts me everyday but I'm dearly glad we met, I'm dearly glad you loved me, I'm dearly glad for everything. No regrets, no remorse. No take backs. I keep it all, I wont forget for a thousand years how good and kind and loving you were to me.

You're love is so real, your heart is so beautiful. And you will always find a brother in me.

6 months
26 weeks
Here we are
And here I am.

My commitment to you complete
I get back up upon my feet
I take in the new day
And I open my heart in a brand new way.

December, Help me never to forget her.
December help me to never say goodbye.

I love you Lauren, I love our story, I love the memories and the magic and the divine sovereignty that God played in our relationship. I love the lessons learned, and the stories of you that I still tell, of your passion, your generosity, your love. You're magic.
I love our story. The story of a guy at a summer camp in New York who fell in love with a girl from Missouri and how God used each of them to reveal to each other His wonderful love.

Over in a flash
Yet seeming to last a life time.

I woke up in November from my summer nap.

I breathed in deep air that for the first time in months was not hindered with the chill of pain and loss.
The burden of losing someone so precious and lovely.

Time is a slow yet effective healer, and can treat any type of hurt or wound, or so they say.
In reflection as I look back on my time with dearest Lauren, I'm so utterly grateful,
if I could do it all over again knowing full well that our love would end, I would gladly and speedily choose to take myself through all of it once more. The distance, the missing eachother, the long drives, the time spent apart.

For me it was always worth it.
Even with the thought that we could potentially break apart.
The love she gave me and showed me and taught me, I'll never forget it. Not even when I'm a hundred years old.

I'll probably end up writing a book about that love she had, I'll teach my daughters one day to love like her, to care like her, to be like her.

My time with sweet Lauren was one of the greatest Investments I have ever made

Some have tried to offer apologies for all the money and time I spent with her, yet I quickly turn them down and tell them I gained more out of my time with her than I could have in a lifetime with anyone else

Yet November is here
November has come

Though the feelings fade, and my heart begins to heal, I won't let myself forget her face, her smile,
Her magic that mesmerized me.

I'm sorry we're here
And I do dearly wish we were elsewhere, preferably together. And I'd be lying if I said that I don't sometimes miss you, or love you, or want you, or think of you, your lips, your hands, your feet swift as a doe, made to dance. Your embrace, the way you would run out of your front door and meet me half way in the freezing cold, bare footed and wearing shorts with the brightest and most beautiful eyes I truly have ever seen. The way you'd let me sweep you off your feet. Magic.

But its November now, and here we are near strangers once again. I fear a piece of me will always love you, Lauren.

Falling leaves
And rolled out sleeves
I wipe my brow and I keep marching on

When October is over
Awaken my heart

When October is over
Allow me once more to start

The warmth starting to fade and a  
new chill transforming the world we know Into a dark and barren place.
Yet deep down hope is rekindled and light begins to shine.

When October is over
Let me know

When October is over
I'll let her go

But just for a little while longer
I'll hold on to her,
I'll embrace her memory,
I'll seek out her friendship
I'll dream of the day when I win her back,
I'll write love songs to her and not share with anyone
I'll paint for her with all the skill my shaking hands can muster
I'll practice my dancing to impress her
I'll pray to God to hold her once more
I'll wash my face and comb my hair
I'll dress myself in all of her favorite clothes I own
I'll imagine an impossible life with her, seeing the world and living out our dreams.

Wake me up when October is over
But for now let me sleep and enjoy this dream, this wondrous dream I've been stuck in.
Let me lie to myself that perhaps she yet loves me,
Let me lie to myself as I imagine her saying she wants me back
Let me lie to myself and say there's hope for the love we once had
Let me lie to myself sweet mysteries
Let me Reforge the passion, reignite the romance arouse my inmost desire:
To hold her as I did that first night we met. That first embrace, that wonderful surprise,
Realizing that she was so much better than I could have ever imagined.

When October is over
Please don't let my dreams continue,
But humor me just for awhile as this month passes by, to imagine a life by her side.

To remember you
My dear September
To remember your smile
To remember your touch
To remember the way you showered your love in the little things
To remember your intentionality
To remember your grace
To remember you dancing,
Like a dream you were when I held you in my arms,
Like a dream you were when I kissed you with my mouth.
Like fresh honey, or new oil,  I knew your value fully well, I knew how precious you were, dear September

I knew not to take you for granted,
I knew to hold you tight and treat you right.
I knew to sing you love songs and tell you "in my arms was where you belonged"
I knew to be tender with you, gentle and sweet, I knew your value fully well and I strove to help you see it.

You were my dear and my darling,
You were my love, my Victor's crown.
When our hands met I knew heaven came down,
You were my shining Oasis in a sea of sand, you were my world, my marching band.

September I remember you,
You're golden hair, your golden heart.
September I remember and I'll never forget though I may now be gone.

September though I must move on,
I'll always remember.

The rains of August
Those darkest days

Denial setting in
Masking the hurt beneath thick skin

Reality hurts
Waking up still nowhere near over her.

Another day
Another week
Another month

And still my heart is resolute on loving her

Another day
Another week
Another month

Still she visits in my dreams
Soaring on wispy moon beams
Whispering in my ears
Casting away all my fears
Wiping away all those tears

There one lovely moment,
Gone the next

To think of another
Causes me to shudder
We speak occasionally
Cruel brief moments with a girl I cannot seem to forget.

August, you were mostly bleak
Mostly filled with business and reflection on better days.
Yet near your end light appeared at the end of the tunnel.

Not much. Just a glimmer, just a glimpse of a future that in which I could one day find myself living in.

A future of happiness once more, a love like the one I shared with her,
A love that I could write a thousand poems about and never run out of words.

August you were my darkest,
Yet you showed me that even in the darkest of nights
There's always shining lights, illuminating some bright future, pointing beyond my momentary troubles.

August you were my darkest,
But you showed me the depths
So that one day I could climb the heights.

Thank you, dear friend.

Through loud crashes
And heroic smashes
Through long nights and lonely walks
July you stayed by my side.

July, you were there
When few could claim thus.
You showered your care
When others made hardly a fuss.

July, you were there
When the bottom fell out
July so fair, so constant
When all I could do was shout

July,
You were my first days without her
My first lonely nights,
my misery, my muse,
my history, my news

July I don't know why you came to me
Or how I ended up with you at my side.
But now that time has past, and those wounds have scared and healed
I'm ready to return to you and say that Im grateful for you, and for those really hard nights.

They taught me the brevity of life.
They taught me to hold on:
To those I love a little tighter,
To those I cherish a little deeper,
To stay up talking a little longer,
To drive a little farther,
To try a little harder,
To love a little richer

July July,
I cry to think
I cry to remember
I cry to retrace those summer steps
Those first days without her.

July July,
Thank you for being there
When I didn't understand
And I couldn't comprehend.
Though I didn't see it
You were what was best.

June,
You came to soon.
I was not ready for you to bloom

10 months of happiness
Then you let us go
Following your convictions
You abandoned your heart
And left me on my own.

June,
You came too soon,
Like shadows that cover the moon
Or the cry of the loon
You came unexpectedly.

I'll never forget you
You're love,
Youre sweetness,

Those happy memories
Lakeside dances
Fire light romances
Taking our chances

June, you're gone now
And I fear I am too
June, you took your bow
But I'll never forget you

June, you were lovely
But that's all over now.
I'm glad you came to me
I'm glad you shared your love with me

I'll forever treasure it
And never forget it or disdain it.

You're love for me
Was an alabaster jar
Broken at my feet
And I'll never forget the way you taught me to offer that love in return.

June, you came too soon
I was not ready for you to bloom
I was not ready for you to say goodbye.
But I'm ready now, ready to say goodbye,
So here I'll try.

Goodbye June.
May I never forget the love we shared.

May:

May I dream like I once dreamed

May:

May I sing like I once sang

May:

May I dance like I once danced
alive and full of youth.

May:

The fire alight once more
like on that rocky shore
those pounding waves,
those mighty mountains,
that lonely river
that old man with his old stories and his old staff.

May:

May I breathe like I once breathed.

May:

May I love like I once loved.

May:

May I feel the same way I felt when I was with you once more.
May that feeling not be lost, may it return to me, like flowers in spring, like waves on that rocky shore, like stars at dusk, like the sun at dawn, like the echo in the mountains, like a train on its track.

May:

May I see like I once saw

May:

May we be as we once were
In love, and full of love, filled with love, intoxicated by love.

May:

May you return to me
May you return once more.
Like those waves on that rocky shore,
like the rain as it starts to pour,
like the stars in the sky.
Return to me and May we be once more.

Hope anew,
theres hope for you.

Hope alive
There's hope to survive.

April my love,
my sweetest joy
my fervent prayer,
my mystery angel.

The falling petals from the dogwoods
fill the air with a pungent and wanderous odor,
the stars are particularly bright,
the lovely breeze
hints of a lovely spring.

And all I can think about
Is you wearing that green dress
your evening best,
you're enchanting, darling.

Mesmerizing in the April breeze.
You're enchanting, and I'm wonderfully lost
Perfectly lost in this April spring
This wondrous thing, this April spring.

April, my dear
My sweetest gift
let no sorrow,
no stormy rift
ever come between us.

April, my love
midnight enchantment
early morning magic
Sing me to sleep and lull me with your songs.

Step into line
I'll follow yours,
if you follow mine.

Let our boots click,
let this feeling stick
let this moment last
hold on tight and I'll swing you fast.

Step in step,
March along,
Step in line
as we sing our  song.

March, you're full of life now
March, don't you worry
and I'll show you how.

She's a good girl,
with a lovely smile
You're a good man,
but its single file

Wait your turn,
hold out hope,
your dance isn't done
this march ain't through for you.

Soon she'll be back in your arms,
you just march along, and sing your song.

March, you're full of life now
March, watch and I'll show you how.

Deftly, gently, carefully yet confidently
pursue yet don't crowd,
love, yet from a distance.
Encourage and support,
her life is more important than "our life"
her heart is more precious alone,
than it is in your hands.

March along and sing your song,
March alone and march for her.
Win her friendship, before you win her heart.
Win her trust before you win her hand.
Be the friend she's prayed for,
Be the man she needs you to be,
not the man you think to be.

March as if everything depended upon it.
March and don't you ever quit.

Wake up
Fall in love again.

Let the pulse return,
as the trains of wandering thoughts
begin to collide.

Beat, beat, beat,
February is on back on the tracks
Churning, spurting, awaking anew.
February, these good ole days
their back for good.

Oh February, help me to see once more
Just what it is I'm working for.
February, you know me so well,
you hear my heart, and feel my pulse,
you understand my battle
You emphasize with my struggle.

Oh February, don't ever leave me,
These wondrous times,
these melodious signs,
You're good for me,
and we both know that.

Sing me to sleep and nurse me back to health
Show me the immense depths,
the kindness you claim as your wealth.

Let's talk long after the fading light
and sing our songs of love tonight.
Let's dance in this romance,
this wondrous, and magical lovely night.

January,
Are you the only,
one left?

Oh I heard a song,
sung by angels and the stars,
They sang of what could be
the days ahead in January

The love that we shared
Those times when I knew
that you cared.

But January's gone,
and the rain begins to pour,
and those stars sing their songs
no more.

January,
it's been months since I saw you
So long since last I felt the way I did when I was with you.

January,
I think it's time
that we rewrite the past
that we pick up the mast
and speak at last.

January,
let the music begin once more,
once the rain stops pouring
let the stars sing,
let the love back in.

Let the snow melt as time passes on.
Let the cold thaw,
let the warmth return.

Oh January, how I've missed you.

See the world
Feel the rhythm of its heart
See the people
Capture the vision here at the start

Open your eyes
Begin anew
Open your mind to the world
Created for you.

Explore the wide open beauty
Understand the intricate design
Breathe in the wide open air
Soak in the glory, sublime.

It's all around
The magnificence,
A whole world to be found
Creator's benevolence abound

Draw away from a society that held you down
Take stock of the aesthetic
Creations crown.

What the mountains could never compare
Let the heavens declare
For Him to whom all things are for
Let the oceans roar

From heaven's glorious heart
Comes fourth abounding creation
From nothing
Life, bursting into existence

Like never before
See a world as it was created to be
Every created creature and being,
Drawing breath from He:

Who cares for the little ones,
Who calls us daughters and sons
Who knows the intricate parts of all things,
And holds no reserve for the Joy He brings

Who controls and protects,
Who governs the systems of the galaxies
Who cares for each and for all,
Never once letting one fall.

He is Jehovah
He is Yaweh
The Creator God
The Maker, the Potter,
the great Designer

This is the world we know
He is the God who made us
This is the world He created
For us to enjoy
For glory to be His

Praise His name you peoples
Praise His name
For His Creation is truly wonderous
His works indeed are good
His abounding love patchworked,
Into the very frame of His creation.

He is a God who creates
Who expands imagination and design
What eye has seen
What witness has beheld
The glorious wonders,
The magnitude of His full creation.

This is the world we know
And all of creation will show
His greatness intertwined
In every thing He designed  

Glory in the Highest,
The Creator and maker of all things.
Yes and Amen,
The Angels roar
Yes and Amen,
His mountains proclaim.
Yes and Amen to Christ the Lord
To Him through which all things are sustained.
Yes and Amen.

To be surrounded
yet still alone.
To have it all
Yet still lacking some

To be loved
But not feel loved
To be found
But still feel lost
To be physically at home
But mentally still out on the open road.

Wandering without meaning
Roaming without a purpose.

Yes, dear reader
These are my greatest fears.

I want to be surrounded by love
And know that I am loved
Know that I am fully and securely loved
Whole, accepted, valued, significant.
And I want to share that love and that acceptance
With everyone else that I meet.

But I want it to start with me.
Inside my heart and deep within my bones.
So deep and so raw that it becomes apart of me
Apart of my dna
Apart of my chemical and biological makeup.
That people can't see me, think of me, or talk about me
Without bringing up "love" and "generosity"
Without bringing up the beautiful and wonderful name of
Jesus.

Let this be the goal of my life:
To love and be loved and feel loved and to know that I am loved and that I can be love for those who have no love, for those who have never known love. That I can be the hands and feet of love itself, a son of love, marked by it, molded by it, baptized in it.
Till all I am is love, till I am refined and cut, and sliced, and molded, and shaped, and scorched, and disciplined. Till I become love.Till I can love as I have been loved. To feel the extent of the love that is extended to me. This my dear reader, is my aim.

Its breaking through
Its crashing in on my funk
It's tearing through my veins
Ripping past my bones
It's growing within my chest

I've got a handful of lightning
I've got a head full of stars
I've got dreams so big
They don't fit on this earth

I've got a feeling so indescribable
So uncontainable

I want something
Just like this
Something just
Something just like this.
I want something just like this

I will fight
I will run
I will dance
I will dream
I will envision
I will wait
I will hold on
I will stand strong

For something just like this
I would do just anything
I would fly to mars
I would swim to the depths
I'll climb to the heights
I would ride the wind
I'll cross the void
I would harness the mighty current
I'll bear the weight upon my shoulders
This is no fairytale feeling
No emotion based motives

I want something just like this
And I will roar at the stars
I will soar like a comet
To get it

I want something that is just like this
And I'll do anything to get it

I swing my head left and right
I move my hands up and down
I kick my feet high into the air
I dance away all feeling of doubt
I jump into the great unknown
With the off chance that this will work

Something like this
Just like this
I want something
Something that's just like this

I'm not looking for perfection
I'm not looking wealth
I'm not looking for fame
I'm not looking for comfort
I'm not looking for power

I'm looking for something just like you
just like you

Something that's real,
Something that's genuine
Something that has a heart of gold
A voice of sweet silk
A smile that makes my heart feel like an exploding atom bomb
Eyes that could slice through anything
I want something just like you
Something warm and kind
Something sweet and pretty
Something of true value
Something of immense depth

You make my heart head spin
You make my world go round
You make my dreams come alive
You give my poems life
You give my words meaning and depth


Just like this
Just like you

I want something just like this.

This is my war cry
This is my moment
My do or die.

When the heavens come crashing
down on me
when the mountains rear their heads in defiance of my existence.
When all that I know turns against me
seeking to wipe out all memory
of who I once was.

When the oceans rage
and the skies thunder
when the beasts howl
and the stars plummet violently to earth.
When the darkness consumes all hint of light
when the sun and the moon succumb to the night.
When my thoughts torment me
when my weakness is greater than it's ever been before.

When all hell breaks loose and its minions are unleashed upon me.
When the fear is crippling
when the hate hits its zenith
when hearts break
and all hope in me is lost.
When the rope that I held on to for so long snaps into shreds of dust
when the love I held in my heart gets ripped away.
When everything and everyone
falls into line to tear me apart.

I will not back down.

This is my defiance.
This is my battle cry
my shout of rebellion.

Come hell, come fire, come darkness, come storm

I will not back down.

This is my defiance
This is where I make my stand.
I will not lose ground,
I will make ground.
I will advance.
And I will conquer.
I will see the world
I will see great and wonderful things laid out before my very eyes.
I will see faces from the far corners of the earth
I will climb the highest mountains
I will bear the heaviest burdens.
I will swim the strongest currents
I will bear through harsh cold and fierce heat
I will never stop
I will never quit
I will overcome everything that is laid out before me
Nothing can stop me
Nothing can hinder me from achieving my goals, my dreams, my desires.

I am a loose cannon, no one can hold me down now
I am as free as the wind
as wild as the sea.
I am defiance
And defiantly I will rise above this tempest.
I will rise and I will overcome.

I am Defiance.
Try and stop me now.

Its closing in
Burning within
Beneath my skin
My darkest sin.

Its rising to a peak
It's blinding me from what I seek
It snaps at my  feet
It shouts out at me with all its strength
"I am your defeat!".

It's eyes ablaze
yet oh so dark
What measure knows his tallied days
What fathom holds  his tormented heart.
It peers unwanted into my fragile soul
it grasps tightly
desperate to take me down and pull
me with him.

His hold so tight,
like an eternal night
the fear goes on and on and on.

But then I see it.
Or perhaps it's a Him and not an it.
It's bright as the sun yet I can look right at it.
Its coming close
so very close.
My heartbeat quickens,
my frail courage thickens
And the beast that grasps my soul clenches tighter
as the light before me glows brighter.

As the being comes closer I can tell that it's a Man
but like no man that I have ever seen,
his eyes carry the fiercest gleam,
like nothing else I've ever seen,
like no dream thats ever been dreamed.

I can see pure white light
the fire that surrounds him is ferocious
yet somehow I am surviving this sight.

I look down and I feel
the cold, clammy claws
of the beast start to peel
away.

Before the brilliance
and the sheer glory
of Him who comes
The beasts resilience
and the wretched story
we share
begin to crumbled.

Piece by piece,
link by link
stone by stone
the dungeons, the shackles the walls,
that the beast had build around me
Began to undo.
All his work, everything that he had fought for for so long,
now coming undone in mere moments.

Suddenly I feel it
The great weight coming off.
I had been at the bottom of the sea
with a millstone tide around me
with all those voices telling me
who I ought to be.
Telling me what I ought to see
down in that devil's sea
where all around me
was darkness.
A darkness that gave me a false identity,
a darkness that told me I could never be.
"Now see darkness?" I shout "I now can be,
for you now can not.
For He set me free, He said son you're free!
so be here no more in this devil's sea.
Come with me now
I want to give you an eternity with me."

I stretched my weary legs and jumped for freedom
I watched as the beast plummeted down into his doomed kingdom.
It was finally over.
The weight off my shoulder
all those long years,
all those wretched tears.
I was free.

As I reveled in my freedom
He stepped in near,
He said "In me there is no fear".
He said "My son, my son I will never forsake you."
I said "But I am not worthy, if only you knew
what I know, if only you had seen what I have seen."
He simply looked into my eyes
with those burning eyes of his,
And He said "I know 'everything', and 'everything' doesn't change a thing.
My love for you is unconditional, my love for you comes without a price or expectations. It's pure, it's whole, it's bigger than you could ever imagine. I have always loved you, I have always been with you, but you have not always been with me. I have set you free now be free and see all that I have for you.
My son your 'everything'  doesn't make you weaker, it doesn't make you less attractive to me, it doesn't hinder me from loving you. Your 'everything' only makes you stronger. Your story is your strength. Your past is your rock. Broken bones grow back stronger, Broken hearts grow deeper, broken souls find their healer and re-find their purpose.
The best is yet to come for through me
You are STRONGER.

Deepest blue
Those eyes on you.
They blaze and burn
Making my stomach turn.
I'm lost in the moment
so lost in this moment
I can't believe that I'm so lost in this moment.

Your eyes are on me, so very kind
they gaze into the secrets I hoped no one would find.
They pierce my skin and search within
they find what's wrong and they reveal my sin.
They see me for who I am and not for what I've done
They bring the darkest parts of me into the sun.

Not a whisper of judgment
No murmur of condemnation
Your eyes are love, pure, wild, blue as the sky.
They look at my shame filled heart
and they say to me"For this I will die".

I get lost in your eyes,
in your beautiful clear eyes.
They smile at me and I know I am not alone
In your eyes I am accepted, valued, worthy, priceless, loveable, pure.
Jesus, in your eyes my purpose is revealed
In your eyes my heart can finally be healed.

Your eyes, like nothing I've ever seen before,
So genuine, so full of honesty, an open door.
When I look into them I instantly know that I can trust them.
Those eyes of yours Jesus, that see the beauty in the broken
That see the best in everyone, that never judges or condemns.

In your eyes there is a love vast as the ocean
An empathy that knows my circumstance and understands my journey.

Your eyes ablaze, will satisfy my soul
for all my days.
Your eyes like a burning flame
Leaves me changed and never the same.

I'm found in your eyes
That see me for my potential
I'm found in you amazing eyes
That will never stop hoping or believing the very best for me.

Rambling rivers
Bone shivers
Vegetation withers
The beast slithers

Ocean tides
Coward hides
Avalanche slides
Gunman decides

Feel bold
Know cold
Tightly hold
Lies sold

We all decide
Choices collide
Friends make war
Enemies make amends
Opportunity closes her door
nightmare never ends.

Life is a fickle one
For all of us,
under the sun.

This is for all of us
those who share this world,
under the sun.

Breathless I gasp.

Voiceless I call.

Your face eludes me,
your heart so very far from mine.

What a peculiar state we're in,
lost in the wild,
drowned in the silence.

These days I struggle to see your face,
your smile,
your laughter.

How come we by this canyon?
This incredible divide.

It weighs ever so heavily upon my soul,
tearing the life from my chest,
ripping the very heart in me.

Your face eludes my vision
I cannot see you,
your so far away from me,
I'm helplessly lost in the night.

I grasp at thin air
searching for what is not there,
for your are so far away,

So very,
far away.

It drives me.

Colliding my heart and my soul.

A night of wondering.

A voice in the dark.

Memories come
memories go.

I lie awake all night.

Even counting sheep don't help me sleep.

Sweet insomnia
excitements symptom.

I close my eyes
and I come alive.

These are the days my friend,
before it all begins.

Revel in these days.

Sweet insomnia comes to me when I close my eyes
my mind drifts
my heart flutters.

My body never to rest.
Forever locked in her sweet sleepless embrace
I bend knee and let insomnia in
ever to wander the gloom.

Lost in the chaos
alone in the crowd.

I don't know who I am anymore;
since you've gone so much has changed.

Everything is unfamiliar,
everything is gray.

Days have passed with not but a smile on my face.
I pray to God
this day,
to give me grace.

This life so long
so bleak.
This Misery so real,
so harsh.
These days I don't know who I am,
most nights,
dreams hide and tears stream.

How to move on
when you're so far away?

Lost in the misery
alone in the chaos.
I drown in the loneliness,
I agonize through these dark times.

Tell me love,
when is the dawn?

Rhythm of the night
Hold me tight.

Sing me songs from years gone by,
When love was alive.

Lull me to dream one last  time
Twirl me around that old music line.

Ignite my soul,
Ignite my bones,
Turn my feathers into stones
And keep me grounded by your melody.

Rhythm of the night
Be my guide
And be my light.

Be my end
And be my start.

Fill my bones and ignite my heart.

Rhythm of the night
Be my shining light.

I'm lost in the light.
Spinning in the light.

I'm dancin' in the night
With you I'm dancin' in the perfect, lovely night.

Life is beautiful,
I couldn't be happier.

So here I am,
This moment couldn't be better.


I'm lost in the light
I'm dancin' and I'm smiling at you.

The drinker pays his dues
The Singer sings his blues

And in the midst

I'm lost in the night,
I'm dancin' with you.

More and more
I feel the pull of the unknown.

A relentless urge
to press on into the void

Going where none have gone,
Where none have dared.

I hurl myself into the mist
unsure of what is to follow.

I hold faith in my steady feet to guide me through,
my eyes to see beyond,
my heart never to falter,
my will unbreakable.

Shrouded in fog
Clouded in fear
The future awaits my coming.

Onwards and upwards
into the chasm of death.

Onwards and upwards my destiny awaits.

This is my ode to you
Lover of life
Giver of joy

Your waters cascade from the mighty heights
Your power descends from above

Your like an ocean
constant
Ever on the move
Ever flowing

My song to you
Is my song of you
Your beauty
Your grace
Your smile
Your world the one you have created
That I so long to be apart of
That I will never be apart of

My eyes swell with tears
My lungs clench with grief
Suddenly Its hard to breathe
The weight of an eternity without you
Hangs heavey on my shoulders
Like millstones around my neck
It drags me to the depths
Taking me down
Deeper than I could have ever deemed possible

Will I ever you see you again?

And so I sit on the shores of this vast expanse
This host of water
This wasteland of sea
I sit here and I think of you
I think of the days we spent

The day in the park
The day in the mountains
The day in the hills
The day at the lake

I sit here and I think of all those times
And in a way I feel as if I am robbing eternity of its captive
I am freeing my mind to the wonder that once was mine.

I close my eyes and I think of you
I breathe life into dry bones
Bring back the love I once had.
And this my ode to you my long lost love

Your beauty will always be in my memory
Your smile never forgotten
Ode to you my long lost love
This is the song I sing for you.

Flashes of white
Warm and beautiful.

Dancing silhouettes play quietly in the moonlight.

Lanterns flicker
Candlers whisper

Canopy of light
Casting out the night.

Dancing slow
Holding tight

Your eyes aglow
such a beautiful sight.

I take pause to breathe it in.

My heart so full
I fear I may sink

My head spinning
twirling
round and round.

This is the moment I have waited for for so many years
So many lonely nights
Suffering silently
forcing a smile.

But now that's over and you're here
and you're perfect.

This place is perfect
silhouettes dancing,
the glowing lights.  

The melody of the music
the warmth of your smile.

Happiness surrounds me
a canopy of light,
as long as I have you.

The stars aligned
and the clouds parted but for a moment.

And in this moment
we were eternal
immortal
unscathed by the problems of this world.

We held on
cherishing every moment as it soared by.

The pain of tomorrow
lied over our heads;
the loneliness
the overwhelming sadness
the held back tears
killing us ever so softly.

Distance will rip us apart
love will stretch till it becomes to thin.
And our love will fade
like the morning mist,
consumed in the chaos
drowning in a world that is not fair.

But as for now
I will bask in your embrace
I will sing the songs of joy
I will hold on to this moment with you
forever.
I will close my eyes to the darkness
I will make my stand
and refuse to be intimidated by its shadow.
I will hold you close
and I will hold you dear.

And when the clouds come together once again
And those starry lights fade far into the night
I will know that you and I will be alright.

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Over the wild blue sea
across a world of turmoil

Through deep forests
and wild skies

Lies a place
ancient and mighty

High towers look gloomly down over iron gates and broken walls.

This was once a place of strength,
a fortress of might
a stronghold against the darkness.

But time has played Its role
rusting the polished metal
rotting away at the foundations.

Its time has already come and gone
The fortress is not but a heap of ruin
a long gone shadow in the distant past.

Over magnificent peaks
rushing rivers and sprawling cities

Through tempest
storm and shroud
Does it lie

Slumbering silently
in broken ruins.

Open your eyes
so that I may show you my world

Open your ears
so that I may whisper my wisdom

Open your mind
so that I may fill it with my wonder

Open your heart
so that I may show you my love.

Open your hand
take mine with it
and gaze upon the wonders of this world
with me.

I can see it



There
                   off in the distance.

So                                        far
     I can barely make it out

Its bright
                 beautiful

magnificent to
                                                   behold.

      My future riddled with apprehension and doubt
my destiny a blank puzzle.






Yet                     still
              I
see                      it

Over          ­                       m
                                      o       u
                                   n             t
                                a                     i  
                                           n
Over      r
            o  c
              k

Through          ­                d                  a                 n
                                                   g                 e                     r
and            t
                  r
                    i
                  a
                    l
H a r d s h i p  
                                                             ­                                   and s u f f e r i n g

It lies
                                    waiting for me to appear.

Waiting
                      for
                                   me
                                              to
                                                                ­        appear.

From so far away
I can see it.

A shroud
of
pain

A cloud
of
darkness

A myriad
of
suffering

An endless ocean
swallowing me whole.

Kept captive

Made slave

Forced
into
*******

Dragged away.

Chained by fear

Forgotten by all

I lay in the aftermath
beaten,
broke.

The mountains
hear my voice and turn their backs
The forests
see my anguish and do nothing
The oceans
know my pain, and yet continue to ignore me
The winds
carry my cries into the void where no one will hear
The rain
snuffs out my air choking me
The thunder
booms overhead mocking my misery
The birds
fall silent
The shadows
creep over my head
The sun
covers its face in mist and shroud
The moon
refusing to come
My fate
sealed by the cruelty of nature
My destiny
a hopeless cause.

I am a wanderer
forgotten and lost.
Shifting in between the vast pages of time

Fallen from grace
cast out from eternity.

My voice carries no weight
my eyes see only darkness
my ears hear only my weightless screams
my legs are useless
my arms wont move

I am trapped
in a bottomless abyss

Free falling forever.

Her heart is young
her mind so free,
she runs like the wind
the hair at her back
like wylde fire in the night sky.

There is something mysterious about her.
A great puzzle
an endless maze.

She keeps up a front
she pushes reality to the back.
Her actions do not bend to her heart.
She is as wylde as the stallions
unbroken,
untamed.

For a brief moment she was mine.
I felt her heart beating
and I gazed into those deep blue eyes.

And as suddenly as it came
the moment left me.
She sailed far down the coast
and away from my heart.

I will never gaze into those eyes again
I will never look upon the fire she held inside.

She is unbroken
untamed
her fire will never be quenched.

Her heart
ever blazing on.

Stars fall apart
And love grows cold

Days turn into years
And shadow envelopes us

Tears stain
And hearts collapse

But we must move on

To you I say these things
Let your love grow tall
Let your joy abound
Let happiness fill your life

Until the end of your days
May your heart be full.

Let love be my companion,
when I walk through the storm.

Let love guide my heart
though broken and torn.

May I walk upright
and never stoop.

Let compassion
fill my being.

Mercy,
my soul.

Kindness,
my passion.

Peace,
my desire.

When tempest rage
when shadows come,
let love be my guide.

When words are harsh
and eyes pierce like daggers,
let love be my strength.

When swords are drawn
and arrows fly,
let love by my shield.

When hate corrupts
and sorrow abounds,
let love be my courage.

Through storm
through fire,
let love be my champion.

In the depths of the night
there is light.

On the darkest of days
there also is light.

When love turns cold
when stars burn out.

When smiles fade
and shadow creeps

When hearts break
and fear fills us

There is light to guide us home.

She haunts me
with her love.

She mesmorizes me
with her beauty.

She's haunting me
Her stare sees through me
Her voice shakes my bones.

She is enveloping me
Dragging me into the depths.

My Mind screams unheard
Every instint going off like little alarms.

My Heart follows her every move
Tracking every step
Beating all the more.

Screaming within
Dying of doubt.

No life with
No life without.

I drown in the crossroads.

My heart and my Mind
Forever at war
Forever at odds.

No solution
This creeping pollution.

My soul roars
Ripping apart
Scattering the floor.

I drown in the crossroads
I slip on the *****.

Divided against myself
How will I cope?

Trapped inside one
I really am two.

Broken apart
The pieces to my puzzle
All wrong.

In the dead of night
When the moon is bright
When the stars give their light,
She haunts me
with her love.

Whispers
surround my head,

Whispers
infiltrate my bed,

Whispers
long,
wickedly wishing
me dead,

Whispers
are everywhere,
but only in
my head.

The love I had
never again to be found.
The heart in my chest
forever bound.
Broken am I,
a wretched soul
drifting upon an endless sea.
I break upon the shore line
shattering into thousands of particles,
spreading across the earth.
My heart is cold
my lungs wont hold,
my tears freeze
floating on the slightest breeze.
And yet all I can think of
is the smile
that had won my heart
pipped me asunder,
right from the start.
Made me whole,
taught me to love,
gave this life a reason.

But never more,
never more.
My destiny
is to forever be
cast apart from your love,
floating eternally
on the waves
of the endless sea.

Flutter flutter
little bird.
Flutter flutter
little thing.

Hush and listen
to this song I sing.
Good health and good fortune
to you,
it will bring.

So flutter little bird
flutter to me oh precious one.
Listen to this song that I will sing,
listen to my song
the song of the stars.

“Are the stars in the sky,
like you and I?
Do they flutter
or do they fly?
Do they shed their shining feathers
and make their nests out of
sticks and heather?
Do they sing sweet songs
or forgive each other
of all slights and wrongs?
Are the stars like you and me?
Can they soar in the air
so high and so free?
Can they loop and swing
flip or sing?
Or,
are they just stars?”

So flutter little bird
flutter little thing,
and don't forget a word
of the song that I sing.