are you good enough for me?
am I good enough
for you
is the better question
don't lessen your worth
just because you're hurt

four eggshell walls
a square footage so small
jesus christ, i pay for this?
it nearly works the tears out of me
wringing out the sweat
on the daily
worst of all
it's all i can afford
i'm going crazy

I like ****** the most
When they're quiet and know their worth.
Them being the only ones
To sell themselves out;
Set the rate yourself.
It'd be a shame
Living on your back
For but paltry wealth.
Small penance too,
For fleeting looks and fading health.
Not a profession with a pension,
Not a career with a penchant for happiness;
But if *******'s your passion
It's shorter lived in-person than on camera.

Quiet attrition.
Unavoidable, sadness and contrition.
But for the end of the numb,
Who does not feel the same.
Where we go under, and succumb.
When at wit's end, and we are done.
The game grown stale, the race run.
One last fling, before we finish;
I hope this was fun.

he needs me
she hears herself say aloud
but will he be there for you in your days old
when grey hairs have cropped up on that crown of gold
does it make you proud
to have a lover so cold
he needs me
to keep from being bored
warding off the draft that is his frigid soul
doesn't being superwoman take it's toll
you give and you give and you give
but it ain't your pony show
you're too busy working to live
to think, you're just the clown at the rodeo

was it hardened amber
encasing an extinct flower
another blunder from another man
time and time again

pompeii
not a care in the world
then yours ends suddenly
and preventative measures could've been taken
if you knew them,
but you know ash
and ebony sky
and obsidian nights
like city streets
cold and unnerving

mastodons roaming
birds tweeting
discordant
kings
in a coinbase
fixing the 22nd century
for feudalism
meta minded
immoral
and then there's the real problems

being begets being
bringing suffering
surrendering
a tearing of the flesh
wailing

because the air is cold

I don't understand people
At this point, it just makes me laugh
All the self inflicted wounds
Deep cuts gouged
The headaches exhumed
Over matters long put to rest
Many a dead love resumed
How we go from next to last
Slow and fast
Anything but graceful
This solemn dance

If it sounds crazy,
Then it is.
If it rings of sanity;
Their words are of
Another's, only rearranged.
If it's hard to understand,
Then I guess it's not worth knowing.
Pretty strange then, so many
Prestigious people agree.
So, who's crazy -
You or I?

What's lazy?
People who take things at one glance of an eye

I cannot erase the past
at last,
it's clear,
even the blemishes add to its splendor

i'm detaching from it all
i don't know
does that necessarily mean death?
of one thing or another, i guess
this recent disillusion
blind confusion
over what love was real
who i am and what i stand for
and i feel
i can't believe anything
so what's the point, of believing
what's the point of anything

you're not like anyone else
neither am i
so stop comparing me to the people of your past
and i won't compare you to mine

Blackheart by the bed,
Blackheart next to me.
Lying here with you

I don't understand people
running is easy to get though
one leg in front of the other
miles, kilometers
hell, they can take you around the globe
but have you traveled, you know
no matter how far
the problems join you
wherever you go

Winter child,
Drink the drink your mothers made.
Eat the bread your fathers gave; and
Step, one foot already in,
To an early grave.

and it wanes
because I am not giving all of myself
when you will not

I'm asking a question,
Yet, I already have an answer-
What is the purpose?
That the question isn't rhetorical
And that I seek your honest opinion,
Is it not to broaden my view?
In time, horizons expand
If the increments are spent
With the goal of understanding-
Otherwise, it doesn't mean a ****
And we're cursed to repeat again
That which we have already gone through.

Nihilism, because I
Have no option but
To feel. What
Comes from
Broken relations & perspectives
But seeing clear? When
Glass cracks
Do you grab a mirror?
Or do you only forsake
Warm love turned cold?
Do you line with gold
And rebuild what breaks,
Or only grieve the remains?

it's alright to hate me now
smile through the frown
friends at their ends
waking each day, selecting a new face
hide the clown
which jester wears the crown
there's supposed to be one with a belt
head held high
probably be easier if either of you felt
it's all just lies
was i of some use to you
i want to die
reflections of me on my phone
looking down

this emptiness that gnaws at me
there are no words
like chalk lines on the blacktop
joy exists only momentarily
washed away by the rain
as i cry
my dead gaze
weighs heavily
on the mirror cracked
shards of my image
distorted as i am

If I stop to reflect on the horrors
They will consume me
I can only learn from them
And keep moving

Relationships are *******
I want to burn every bridge I have,
Leave nothing but carcasses.
I have nothing left to give

Concern of income as status
And popularity as a moral metric
Among peers just as vain.
What is it that fools compete for?
Simpler lives, duller & plain?
Over complicated, gaudy & cliché?
Playing with themselves like
Dogs with their ***** splayed.

word vomits
deluges of dialogue
the contents, like diarrhea
verbal pacing
filling the air
full of nonsense
far from
turiya

If decency demanded
A pound of your flesh
Would you grab a blade
And hock it off?
Laid on the scales in perpetuity,
The insignificant life does not even register a blip on radar
Yet we still cherish and protect it.
If your life came at a cost,
How many would need die before you were indebted?

i remember
you blowing me off
and acting as if nothing happened
and then not talking for a week
and acting like nothing happened

Do I speak in cryptic ways,
Vague, and detached from
The normal? Do words lash out
In resemblances of diatribes
That drown out all else meaning?
It is not on purpose,
I read too much
Or, I've read.
Pandora's box opened,
Atop Babel's tower,
Clawing my way back up
Not to shut the lid
But change direction, orientation

Very quickly, have my
Compatriots rushed to take sides
In wars & conflicts that are not ours
That have no real bearing on
The American Way Of Life.
And what is that, these days?
Because I know, from
Pouring over history
That we are a very aggressive peoples
Steeped in the rigors of tradition.
But, similarly, believe in equality & peace
And self-actualization & freedom.
We flip between beliefs, diametrically,
With seemingly little reason
More based on superstition.
I know of the hopes they held at the beginning;
The founders of the nation
Who were, in aspects, mistaken;
On women's rights, on enslavement,
And many more. But,
That is the bugle call of progress;
To right what is wrong.
Those things that must be addressed,
For the betterment of all

You wear the chain around your neck,
And it reminds me much of Cain-
Cursed to wander the Earth.
That mark of the beast
Which celebrates human sacrifice,
Still better than the star.

bloodshot eyes
and tell me why
when you cough and they well
it's the only time you cry

Quicker to bite the barrel,
Than pull the trigger.
The weight of life,
Sharper than the edge of a knife
But still lighter than the hammer.
The call of night, of ill light;
The difference between
Hellish damnation, and heavenly ascension.

At the end of my sword
Steps, and lurches toward
The plunge of the blade
Piercing skin

Facing the barrel
Crouching, sights narrowed
The sting of lead
Molten hot projectile

Baring the tide
Waves, focused on the mind
The nausea of lobotimization
Frying the insides

Looking to the sky
Machines, with precision strike
The destruction you know
Chucks of shrapnel

The terrors of war
Changing with time
Only grow more vicious,
And become more refined

Our greatest art
Will be the blank canvas
Nuclear annihilation
Has left behind

this is
someone else's dream
pictures of a dead sea
corpses strewn about me
living an eternity
subsiding
in irrelevancy

into the cistern of your soul
casting petty judgements
not of a proper mind,
I think you're fine

I think I may
Have, I
Can Believe, I see.
I can
Be like you, if I
Alter my thinking

Might have
Just have,
Ought
To had done;
If you
Choose to be,
You can be
Anyone.

By god people, be anyone just
Do something, be
Someone;
Do something.

moments from tonight
will be burned into my mind
hot iron brands on skin
and I don't know
how to feel alright
water filling the lungs in
what good would talking do
and walking is no use
stuck like a pin
I just want everyone to be alright
to be happy and have enough
battles you can't win

greased up
the batteries ready to loose
the bullets waiting to shoot
the jet plane fueled up
awaiting for use
the good men and women
in command
assured of their success
owed to the cunning of their plan
devious as they are
it's all worked so far
from europe, to asia, and sedan
is their nature insidious
or are funds more important than any one man?

The maxim has come to mean:
Forgive me for my transgressions
But don't forget them-
I fought for what I have,
So what if you were the victim?

little trees
and water running over
swollen streams
broken dreams
splintered from reality

should they have remained
contained in this head
this infatuation
dirt colored eyes
but tombstone shy

why

what if i were the deciding factor
between someone being helped or passed over
my conscience wouldn't allow it
i don't think it's my pride
cause i sure could use some help
i just won't be the one to take it from another

When the rains fall away,
We move on with things and
Think nothing of the water which percolates
Seeping into the water table
No thought as it saturates
As cycles repeat
And liquid evaporates, condensates,
And it falls once more;
When rains end

Alone in the wind,
Blowing me once again,
Someplace, far off from here.
Better to live admist, breeze and mist,
In the clouds, awaiting a writ
To come on down, from a supposed higher power
Than labor on the wager
That things get better.

Eyes wide, shut
Carnal knowledge of my fatal attraction.
The thoughts, graphic.
American beauty, in the mood for love,
Match point,
Jig, all up.

i am ready to move on
and let
bygones be bygones
is it abandonment you want
or are afraid of
i honestly ask
is me leaving
what you want
i don't know
i know nothing
just friends?
it's constant communication
which i love
and anger can't stand
if it's on your end
so straighten your twisted wires
and listen to me talk
ad nauseam
are you okay?
no
i'll just ignore it

Cannot speak as to what the future holds
yet still untold
but today, my fingers freeze
hands shake from the cold
and my back aches
begging to break
under each new load
good god they weren't lying
when they said
life is like
a long and winding road

Things unraveling, with no reason.
Hurt people, Hurt people;
Should I let this heart atrophy?
Or let misanthropy and apathy consume it?
Any naive notion disabused
Like love
Advantage, to you
All used

when the sun dwindles
I'm left with a hollow feeling
what's in healing
when I still hurt