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Criss-cross, Wandering Rocks
Scylla and Charybdis I cross.

At the crossroads where I walk,
Which path do I go, am I lost?

What is evil, what is light?
The courtier chose silk or samite?

Do our leaders know, or do we fight?
What exactly is wrong and what is right?
Ugh
I don’t want to see anyone
Because I don’t want to talk
I’ve told my story enough
To those who’ve come on my walk

Am I scared of the judgements
that will come with their stares?
Or am I just sick of talking?
My voice is starting to ware
Am I afraid to stand up for myself?
Maybe I don’t know how

But maybe it’s all an illusion
For all there is is now
So perhaps I will go in
Confident in my now
And they will have no choice
But to say, “oh wow!
She really must be happy
She really must be fine
But if I will say anything
She’s really got it goin’ on”
jecky Nov 25
Honestly, I have no ******* idea what to say...

          I haven't really personally talked to you about anything till now, and I wish that I was drunk to make this a whole lot easier, yet here I am – sober and writing this **** at 3:00 in the morning.

          So, here we go...

          Everyone thinks you're full of ****, but you probably already know that. I personally also think that you're full of **** when things go wrong in my life, but deep down I know that I'm really just mad at myself – because I know thinking that I could've done better. I could've made better decisions. I could've expressed myself more. I could've been happier – along with everyone else I care about. But all of those are just 'could'ves'.

          Recently, I made a really big decision, and it seemed like my life was spiralling downwards. It took me a very long time to think about what I had to do. But at the end of the day, there was this one thing that reassured me that I did the right thing – I felt happy...

          Yeah, sure, I felt guilty about the mistakes I made where I know I could've done better, and I lost a lot that I cared about, but I also got a lot from everything that's happened.

          I learned that you should sometimes be selfish to keep yourself happy in the long run no matter how ****** up the situation gets. And you're never going to be a hundred percent sure of your decisions, but that's life. Just take the ******* risk if you think – no – if you feel that it'll all be worth it.

          You may think that the Universe is just throwing random **** at you, and yes, it probably is, but it all boils down to how you're going to deal with that ****. Because I dealt with it by following my heart, and I assure you that if you don't do the same, you'll be overwhelmed by regret and guilt for the rest of your life.

          To end this on a personal note, what I really want to tell you [Universe] that I am really ******* grateful for everything you've randomly thrown into my life – every moment, every aspect – no matter how bad it got. What's important is that I am who I am, and that I'm constantly trying to make myself a better person while at the same time being happy of what I've got and what's up ahead.
Sincerely,
jecky

It's important to think about other's happiness, but think about your own too.

Note: This entry is still a work in progress.
The Years have passed by,
In the blink of an eye,
Moments of sadness,
And joy have flown by.

People I loved,
Have come and have gone,
But the world never stopped,
And we all carried on.

Life wasn't easy,
And the struggles were there,
Filled with times that it mattered,
Times I just didn't care.

And now as I grow older,
It's become very clear,
Things I once found important,
Were not why I was here.

And how many things,
That I managed to buy,
Were never what made me,
Feel better inside.

And the worries and fears,
That plagued me each day,
In the end of it all,
Would just fade away.

But how much I reached out,
To others when needed,
Would be the true measure,
Of how I succeeded.

And how much I shared,
Of my soul and my heart,
Would ultimately be,
What set me apart.

And what's really important,
Is my opinion of me,
And whether or not,
I'm the best I can be.

And how much more kindness,
And love I can show,
Before the Lord tells me,
It's my time to go.


© Pat A. Fleming
I chanced upon this poem, and made some amendments to it. Sometimes I wonder: Am I using my time wisely? Or am i just wasting my time away? What else can I do to make my life more meaningful?
School gets me really caught up, and my hobbies too, so these days I hardly spent time reading ***'s word. I feel guilty about that, about not being consistent, about not making a lot of effort to grow my faith in Him.
I'm overwhelmed, I'm stuck in a spot. I have come to find out that I really have a passion in music, in songwriting, singing, arranging, dancing, and people say I have the looks too. I go for lessons, courses, and even have my own mini recording studio (which is coming soon). Since this year I've been pondering about whether I should go to Korea and pursue my dreams, and i'm just about the age to go there, audition and be a trainee, but there's the pros and cons. The language is not the problem, but my family thinks my dreams are just because I'm hot-headed and they seem to not support me. So whenever anyone asks me what my ambition is, I'll say that i want to be a lawyer, prosecutor, doctor etc. When will i ever be able to reveal to everyone my real ambition and dream?... *** please help me to trust in Your perfect plan for me, and that opportunities will come if it is truly Your will, because after all, I'm a 13 year old

¬ to those who bothered to read my distress, thank you :)
laur Nov 16
all i think about is you,
how you might not be feeling well
and you’re probably quite overwhelmed
or how maybe you’re enjoying yourself
and smiling so brightly.
i wish i didn’t have to think of you,
someone who could think of someone else,
even if you’re so important to me,
there is someone else more important than me
and at the end of the day,
i’ll have to face it when you say,
it’s just not you.
i prepare myself-
i prepare myself for a far worse heartbreak,
i do not understand why,
should i simply just let go?
it feels so impossible,
letting go of yet another one of my loves
and i don’t want to just simply let go
because i want to hold on so tightly
and to stay for as long as i can.
my heart will have to accept the pain,
the pain it may possibly be given
but for now,
i’ll have to wait for you,
no matter how long it takes-
i will wait.
i can no longer be quick to assume,
i just want you to know that i apologize,
i apologize for dragging you down
and making you feel like it’s all your fault,
that you made me feel this way,
when i am the one that makes me feel this way-
i am the one making such assumptions,
i am the one that makes the tears fall,
i am the one who chooses to cut off people,
i am the one to make such a big deal of this,
soon you’ll realize that i am the one
and it was never ever you.
maybe she’ll convince you of that
because i really can’t,
it is like my words have no meaning
or you’re just not hearing them.
you’ll have to do what you have to do,
say what you have to say,
do not let the guilt wash over you that day
because it’s about who you really feel for
and if it’s just not me,
i’ll understand because it always can’t be me.
i say i’ll stay even when you decide
but i’ll try,
i’ll really try just for you.



you: an angel, battling himself, tearing himself apart over losing someone he loves and breaking their heart. poor angel, why does he have to deal with such difficulties like me? he’ll have to say goodbye the day he decides and a small piece of his heart leaves only to be put back together by the one he loves the most. it’ll hurt but it’ll go away, he will get over it and maybe so will i. no end to his suffering, this poor angel i will simply never stop loving no matter if there’re more angels because he is my angel. i hope he does not regret his decision when the time comes because my angel will have the one he truly loves for once.
i poured my heart and feelings out in this, i really hope whoever sees this, enjoys it!
The sun's down
I'm stuck at a crossroad
heading down town,
on a lonely road with a load.

The moon comes out
and dim is my torch light
Luckily, the street light's out
and on my path, it shines bright.

Now the light points to two directions
it's at my discretion to choose my path.
I realized I'm bad at making decisions
can't tell which would lead to my death.
Isaac Nov 10
Each and every passing day
Will all be washed away.
So live exactly how
You have always wanted to right now.
Be the person you dream of being,
And make the decisions you know are freeing.
Written 10 November 2018
Plain
Clear as day
Sharper than a knife
Thiner than hay
Fields of grey
Sun rays,
Righteous day

Painful truths
Unavoidable decay
Black and white dismay
Broken, make way Make way
Hiding in lies
Abiding in the times
Make way, make way

Starlight shines white
Tonight the truth is bright
Realists fight
Make way, make way
Poorly chosen, alright
Fight, fight for the light
Life like playing chess
until a piece Is released
you can still change
your mind
Just as In life a split
second decision to go
or not to go, to do or
not to do you have
still got a
choice, there was a time I
made that choice for
If not, I Would have
never met the girl
who became my wife she
gifted me a beautiful
son
LIFE IS BUT A GAME OF CHESS
Chess as In life Is choices decisions
about life
Live to me I like a
Jigsaw puzzle as
you move through the
stages of your life a
new piece Is
added
Sometimes a piece
doesn't fit because
of a wrong move a
decision you have
made, you have to
put right before the
piece will
fit
At the end of days If
lucky you have a
complete puzzle if
not, you are left with
the regret could I
have done
more
Puzzle life decisions made how they can effect ones life
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