When I left, we promised to stay in touch.
I remember for months we’d send emails every day, keeping as close as possible.

On our birthdays we’d post photos of us smiling for all the world to see.
“One of my closest friends” the caption would say.
“I miss you so much” my comment would be.

I seem to have skipped years between then and now, because I  lay awake wondering how we’ve grown so distant.
The last time I emailed you was two years ago, for Christmas. I told you I would call later.
I never did.

I think your birthday was last week. I wouldn’t have known if not for my phone showing me a photo of us at a pool, “seven years ago”, holding plates of cake.
At some point I stopped wishing you a happy birthday, but I can’t remember when.

At some point you stopped telling me your plans for the holidays. At some point I stopped thinking about you every day.
Sometimes I can go months without missing you.
I hate it.

Silver rings
lined with gold.
High heeled boots,
fancy coat.
It seems that you have everything but i know it can’t be true.

Brand new phone;
shiny case.
House such a
dreamy place.
I turn away and act like i’m not so jealous of you.

I’ve been content in my small home.
My few possessions, outdated phone.
But to compare our lives is strange to me;
your brand clothes and my hand-me-down hoodie.

your little corner of my mind
is a happy place;
the only place i can see you.

we think back to our childhood
the fun we had;
i wish i’d never left.

your little corner of my mind
could be a happy place
but it grows smaller every day

Hello, poetry! You’re my best friend
I’ll stick with you ‘till the very end

A foreign feeling- hope?
Is it hope which has settled on me,
after such trials?

The sun shines high in the bright summer sky
But you’re not here, may I ask why?

A glitch in her feelings
A flaw in his head
Small nicks and cuts,
Some never to heal.

Decided at birth
Some of them are
But others appear
Along the road.

Do you feel our pain?
Do you feel the hopelessness that we do,
Crushing in around us every day?

Do you stop and wonder what it’s like to live a life in a dying world?

Do you feel the pain?
It doesn’t hurt for us, not anymore.
It’s not pain, it’s just life.
It’s all we know.
We’ve known from the start, and we somehow find the strength to get up.

We get up.
Every.
Day.

We are forced to fight.
We see the faults in this world.
We love this terrible, wonderful place.
We were born here.
We will die here?

In the end, do we die?

I think I like my reflection;
at least when I’m alone.
But when there’s other people to compare myself to,

It’s easier this way.
Trust me, I know.
I know you can do it
So why doesn’t it show?

Running after you
I think about us
You avoid me

Are we meant to be?

I like to think
all these years of schooling and essays and grammar
existed so i could one day adequately describe my Love for you.

I forced you to go
You told me no
Still I said so
And now off you go.

No.

You wanted to
You said I love you
And our love was true
But now the door is painted blue.

Why are you like that?
Why do you keep acting fake?
This isn’t a game.