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May 2017 · 951
The Girl Who Cried Maybe
madrid May 2017
let me tell you the story
of the girl who laced cigarettes
with the taste of coffee
the girl who stained tissue napkins with sappy phonetics
and the guy who knew nothing of the sort

she carved heartbreak on the surface of her wrists
and broke silence with unessential questions
she wore her wounds in a tight braid
and carried her worries on the pages of a paper-back book
she described her mind as retired
from all the wars she has won and lost
she exclaims sighs of relief
and stands by the neutrality of her hopeless idealism

on the other side of the universe, however

there exists
the personification of oblivion
he betrays his race with an unrecognized voice
and words misunderstood by his own kind
he returns to his world for temporary release
of what
he is still unsure of
and yet
he is certain of the presence of sadness
he masks his isolation with a facade of self-accompaniment
and satisfies his inner desires with empty seats
he covers up his chapters with bottles of prohibition
and mystifies the tables with ashes of past regret
he sings about tomorrow as if it holds a promise
a promise of better days to come
he has gone from mountain to mountain
in hopes of a brighter view of the sun
but amidst all his travels,
he is yet to be blinded by the brightest of flames

and so,
he appears to be void
of reason
of worth
of a sense of purpose
of plans of the future

and maybe this is where the story ends.

with both their hands shaking from an overdose
with momentary glances of unread excerpts of themselves
with the unspoken truths
and with held-back melodies of lyrics still unknown
with curses of similarities
and vows of their difference
with her,
believing she already knows too much
and with him,
thinking she is yet to know more

or maybe I was wrong.

because maybe,
just maybe,

this is where the story begins.
maybe
we'll remain nothing but strangers to each other
and maybe that's okay.
Mar 2017 · 10.0k
Hanggang Tula Nalang
madrid Mar 2017
Hindi ko mapagkakaila na marahil ikaw na nga
Ang pinakamatamis na tulang naisulat ko
Hindi ako sigurado kung dahil sa ikaw ang unang lalaking hinalikan ko sa ilalim ng bumubuhos na ulan
O dahil binigay ko ang lahat sa laban na 'to
Mula ulo hanggang paa
Mula buhok hanggang kuko
Mula balat hanggang buto
Tagos ang mga salitang yumayakap sakin bawat gabi
Halos hindi na nga tayo matulog diba sa dinami-dami
ng kwentong ibinahagi natin sa isa't isa

Naaalala mo pa ba
Noong sinabi mo sakin ang takot mo sa dilim
At kahit hindi ako nakakatulog ng may ilaw
Hindi ko pinapatay kahit para sakin nakakasilaw
Para sayo

Naaalala mo pa ba?
Noong unang beses kong sinabi na mahal kita
At ang nakakatawa ay ayaw mo pang maniwala sa aking mga salita
Dahil matagal tagal mo rin tong hinintay
Dahil sa ating dalawa
Alam natin na ikaw ang nauna

Naaalala mo pa ba?
Ang mga pagkakataong nagtabi tayo sa kama
Pero iba
Ibang-iba yung unang beses na nagsama tayo
Matapos kong ibigay ang aking "oo"

Naaalala mo pa ba?
Ang iyong paglaro sa gitara
Habang ako'y kumakanta
At sa hinaba-haba ng gabi ay siya lang ang iyong maririnig
Ang ating musika
Na bumabalot sa buong daigdig
Na para bang wala ng ibang tao sa mundo
Kundi ikaw at ako
Tayo, ang bumuhay sa mga nota
Na para bang may sarili silang isip
Sumasayaw sabay sa pag-ihip ng hangin
Sa akin
Alam ko na sa akin ka lang
At sa'yo lang ako
Ito ang binuo nating pangako
Mapa-dilim, o umaga
Maaasahan mo na sayo lang ako
At akin ka lang

Naaalala mo pa ba?
Kung paano mo ko napangiti
Sa simpleng biro mo ay mabilisang tumutupi ang simangot ko
Na sa kahit anong sitwasyon
Gamay mo ang pagmanipula sa aking mukha
Napapatawa
Napapangiti
Nagigising
Napapatulog
Napapalaki ang mga mata sa gulat
Napapakulot ang noo sa alat ng alak
Napapahalakhak
At maski ang aking pag-iyak ay nakabisado mo na

Pero sa lahat ng naaalala ko
Hindi ko na maalala kung paano mo ko hinawakan
Kung paano mo ko sinabihan ng "walang iwanan"
Kung paano mo ko hinagkan na parang wala ng bukas
Kung paano mo ko tinitigan
At ginawang laruan
Na gagamitin pag kailangan
At isasantabi pag pinagsawaan
Na anumang oras ay pwede paring balikan

Hindi ko na maalala kung paano ka nagsinungaling
Na parang henyo sa sobrang galing
Hindi ko maalala kung paano mo ko sinabihan
Ng mga salitang,
"Binibitawan na kita."
Hindi ko maalala kung paano ko hinayaan
Na sumuko ka ng ganon ganon na lang
Hindi ko maalala kung paano mo nagawang
Sabihan ako ng "Miss na kita."
Habang hinahalikan mo siya
Hindi ko maalala.
Hindi ko na maalala.
At ayoko ng maalala.

Sa totoo lang hindi ko pinagsisisihang wala ng tayo
Pero gusto ko lang sabihin sayo na sinisi ko ang sarili ko
Sa lahat ng pagkakamali mo
Para sa mga bakit na hindi nasagot
Paea sa mga sugat na hanggang ngayon ay hindi parin nagagamot
Para sa mga tanong ng madla na pinipilit ko paring ibaon sa ilalim ng lupa at takpan ng limot

Bakit hindi mo siya kasama?
Ah kasi ayaw niya kong makita.
Bakit siya nalasing?
Ah kasi nag-away kami kanina.
Bakit siya umiiwas?
Ah kasi nagsasawa na siya.
Bakit hindi ka na niya pinupuntahan?
Baka kasi hindi ko binigay ang lahat.
Bakit hindi siya lumaban?
Baka kasi hindi ako naging sapat.

Bakit siya naghanap ng iba?
Bakit nga ba?
Bakit pinagmukha mo kong tanga?

Pero hindi tanong ang pinakamasakit sa lahat
Eto
Eto ang hindi kinaya ng puso
Na para bang ayoko ng mabuhay kahit isa pang oras,
Isa pang minuto
Isa pang segundo
Eto ang mga salitang pinamukhang talong talo na ako

"Uy, sabi niya wala na daw kayo."

Konting konti nalang
Hindi na kailangan budburan ng asukal ang kwentong ito
Dahil uulitin ko
Hindi ko mapagkakaila na marahil ikaw na nga
Ang pinakamatamis na tulang naisulat ko
Sayang lang nga
Hanggang tula nalang ito
Sana pala naging tula nalang tayo
madrid Feb 2017
If I stop drinking water,
would I lose the ability to cry?
Feb 2017 · 567
if you find me
madrid Feb 2017
this time, will i be enough?
wrong place, wrong time
right person
Feb 2017 · 724
Tell me I am not alone
madrid Feb 2017
Am I the only one who is terrified of 2 am?

When everything magically falls into place

And for once

The world is silent

And all you can hear
            is your own thoughts of
                                     self destruction

Thinking about nothing
                                     and everything

All at once

All too much.

Am I the only one?
@amb
Jan 2017 · 675
Honesty
madrid Jan 2017
It's her putting letters into words
So he becomes a part of literature
It's the way she spontaneously smiles when she remembers his dress shoes
It's her sitting on the rooftop holding nothing but a half-spent cigarette
Wishing it was his hand instead
It's the exhausted smell on her comforter
Until the day he sprays more cologne on it
Or body spray, either way
It's being comfortable enough to not wear a bra (at times)
It's her way of looking at the shirt he gave
It's spicy food
And the cup of Nissin seafood

It's his giggling whenever she acts like a child
It's the pendant on his neck
It's the "wo ai ni"
It's the intensity of his stare
It's resisting the urge to **** her
It's the bonnet
It's his first kiss in the rain
It's his fear of oblivion
It's his whispers of "God, I love you so much"

It's closing her eyes when she hears "Walang Iba"
It's the "keka ku, kaku ka"
It's the dark closet in her room
And the inflatable bed of their friend
It's fighting over the simplest things that seem like mountains
Like the Great Wall of China
Or the Battle at Gettysburg
It's her shouting "I hate you!"
Only to hear "I love you too!" in return
It's the duets they got used to.
It's being with each other for 72 hours straight
It's him
saying he's not good enough for her
And her
thinking he deserves someone better.

It's the lapse between seconds
It's him breaking her walls without breaking anything else
It's her making him believe in waking up to the same face for the rest of his life
It's the music
It's the silence
It's knowing that she desires him for herself
Even with all the stars between them.
It's seeing,
That although the road is rough,
She is his medicine
Just as he is hers.
It's the entire universe conspiring to bring them together
It's the petty misunderstandings
Or the major ones.

It's the stargazers.
And the shotguns.
It's loving too much
Or loving just right.
It's you.
Oct 2016 · 4.2k
Second Thoughts
madrid Oct 2016
Mahirap ibigay ang tiwala
Kung minsan na itong nabalewala
Oo, alam kong nasaktan ka niya
Pero tatandaan **** hindi ako siya

Dahil hindi ako tanga, at hindi uto-uto
Bata man ako'y alam ko ang totoo
Malambing sa salita, ngunit salamin ba sa gawa
Matamis ang galaw ngunit matalas ang dila

Takot at hiya, di mapagkakaila
At hindi masisi sa mga paniniwala
Pagkat ito ang nakagawian, mulat sa sakit
Kaya't malakas man sa labas ay mahina parin ang kapit

Saan makikinig, kanan o kaliwa?
Ubos na ang sarili, wala na sa diwa
Walang patunay na magaganap
Walang korteng tatanggap

Isa, dalawa, tatlo
Ako ba ang kinakatok mo?
Mga tanong na walang sagot
Sadyang daan lang ba at kalimot?
You can never really be
100% sure of the future.
Nothing can and will
Be set in stone.
Doubt is acceptable,
With reservations.
Oct 2016 · 592
Here's to love,
madrid Oct 2016
You deserve so much more than people who smile at your face and talk **** behind your back.
Don't let them tell you who you are and who you are not.
Never settle for ****** people.
Feel tired.
Be angry.
Feel betrayed.
Be frustrated.
But when you're done, smile and remember that you got here without their help.
The only approval you need is yours.
When you realize your worth, come back to me and say,

*"I'm ready to give this a shot,
because I know who I am,
and I'm sure that this is what I want"
Oct 2016 · 2.9k
Confession
madrid Oct 2016
You are looking for the kind of love that I cannot give.
In fact, it is the kind of love that cannot be given by anybody else,
But you.

I know you think you've been through the seven circles of hell
That everyday it seems like the entire universe is conspiring against you
That as if the moment you step out of your home, the ground starts to crumble beneath your feet.
But love,
Do not be afraid.

You were made to conquer the army of Palestines
And climb atop the tower of Babel
You were made to crush the walls of Jericho and part the waters of the red sea

You are meant to be so much more than a pawn
You are a king
But a king knows the pain of becoming a servant
For he himself is a servant of the people

Do not forget that your strength comes from within you
Not from the foul words of those who envy
Or from the empty bullet cases of those who desire your failure
Your inviolability comes from yourself
Do not let anyone, ever, make you feel less of who you are

You are a king
You
Are my king

And all I wish for you is happiness beyond measure
Joy that fills the deepest holes in your hollowed heart
Courage that you may step out of your comfort zone and do amazing things
And most of all
Security
You do not need words of validation from your peers
You do not need claps and screams of praises from the crowd just to prove that you are worth something
Do not change for anyone
Not even for me
You are worth more than a thousand diamonds or a million bricks of gold just because you are who you are

I cannot tell you that it will all be good days
Because I am sure that there will be days that feel like ****
You will feel burdened with the weight of the world
You will kneel at the guns of those who criticize your gifts
You will doubt yourself
And you will doubt me
I am sure of that
And there will be times when I would want to let go of your hand
When I will scream at the absence of your attention
When I will run away from the problems WE have to face

But love,
Know that I won't.

I will run the race with you, and carry you if your feet start to fail
I will sing to you when the music stops playing
I will remind you every single day that
You are loved
When you smile
You are loved
When you fail an exam
You are loved
When you are betrayed by your friends
You are loved
When you are at your worst
You are loved
When you don't love me anymore
You are loved

And when the time comes when you want silence from my side
I will willingly give it to you
I will shut up
I will close my eyes
I will take the pain
I will catch your punches
I will receive your harsh words
I will stand up
I will walk away
I will let go
IF you want me to
I will.

You know what is best for you
And I know what is best for me
For now
I just know
That what is best for me
Is you.

On a last note, don't let anyone, ever
Make you feel like you don't deserve what you want

Thank you love
For everything
These are the last words I create for you.
Mar 2016 · 53.5k
sana nakikinig ka
madrid Mar 2016
ito

ang sasabihin mo

sa mga taong iniwan ka

ito ang mga salitang binibitawan
sa panahong niloko ka niya, sa oras
na ang inihain sa iyong hapagkainan
ay ang sarili **** pusong naghihingalo
sumisigaw at sugatan, durog at duguan,
eto na


ang sarap ng tiwala




lasang PUTANGINA.




dahil tangina ng mga taong walang respeto sa tiwala
tangina  ng mga taong sinabihan na ng kanan pero nangangaliwa
tangina ng mga taong walang pagpapahalaga sa nararamdaman ng iba
kaya ang sarap ng tiwala

nabudburan ng isang kutsarang 'tarantado ka pala'
nasangkapan ng limang tasang pagpapakatanga

kaya siguro lasang putangina

sabi nila walang aasa kung walang paasa
walang masasaktan kung walang mananakit
walang mafafall kung wala namang,
pafall
pero hindi ito paninisi sa mga kupal ng mundo
dahil sa gitna ng lahat
ikaw parin ang nandidikta sa tibok ng puso mo
nasa huli ang pagsisisi
at walang ibang maituturo ang iyong mga daliri
kundi ang iyong saliri
na iiyak iyak matapos malaglag
mula sa ika-sandaan apat na pu't tatlong palapag

sino ang sasalo sayo?

na pinaasa, nasaktan at nagpakagago
nauto ng makukulay na salitang umagos mula sa kanyang bibig

sino ang sasalo sayo?

ikaw at ikaw rin ang susubok magtagpi
sa mga tingi-tinging bahagi ng iyong sarili
na ibinigay mo ng buong buo
at ngayon ay ibinabalik sayo ng

pira-piraso

sino ang sasalo sayo?

pero tangina talaga eh

bakit mahirap tanggapin
ang hirap ilapat sa ngipin, kainin at lamunin ang ideya
na sadyang may mga indibidwal na ang tanging ninanais sa buhay
ang tanging hangarin bago sila mamatay
ay ang mangolekta ng mga pangalan, listahan
ng mga napanaan ng simpleng katangahan

Eh sino ka nga ba?
Para maging mahalaga sa isang taong sa simula palang
ay alam **** sasaktan ka na
Tanga ka rin eh.
Ganyan talaga
Mahal mo eh.
Ang tanong,
Mahal ka ba?

Oo - masakit.
Pinaglaban mo eh.
Oo - mahirap.
May pinagsamahan na kayo eh.
Oo - mapait.
Dahil sa bawat minuto na hindi mo siya kasama
mapapatanong ka nalang ng
"Bakit, hindi ba'ko naging sapat?
Hindi ko ba binigay ang lahat?
Ang oras, dugo,
Pawis at puso
Para lang maparamdam sayo
na ikaw lang ang gusto ko.
Na ikaw lang ang pinagdadasal ko.
Ikaw lang ang akala ko iba
sa kanilang lahat.
Uulitin ko hindi ba'ko naging sapat?"

Siguro nga hindi.
Pero tatandaan **** hindi lang ako ang nagkamali.
Hindi ako ang nanakit.
Hindi ako ang nagpaasa.
Hindi ako ang nanggago.
At mas lalong hindi ako ang nagsabi ng mga salitang.
"Mahal kita"
Pero hindi naman talaga.
Ako ang naging tanga.
Pero putangina mo.

Dahil sayo,
hindi nako naniniwala
sa salitang tiwala.
Hindi na ko naniniwala
sa mga katagang "namiss kita".
Hindi na ko naniniwala
sa anumang hugis ng pag-ibig.
Nang dahil sayo,
Natuto na ako.

Ito na ang huling beses na lolokohin ako ng tadhana
Ito na ang huling pagkakataon na ibibigay ko lahat
sa iisang tao lang.
Ito na ang huling mga salita.
Kaya makinig ka.
Hindi na ako magpapakatanga
Para sa isang taong walang karapatang tawagin
akong pagmamayari niya.

Tama na.

para sa mga taong walang lakas ng loob magsalita
para sa mga nagpakatanga, nagpapakatanga at may balak na magmukhang tanga
para sa mga pinaasa ng salitang tiwala

pasensya na sa mararahas na salita
sa pagsabog ng aking dibdib
at pag agos ng mga bala
kailangan ko lang talagang ibahagi sa iba
ang pait ng isang taong binulag ang sariling mga mata
ang kasinungalingan sa likod ng pagiging masaya
ang pinagmumulan ng punyetang duda
ang sarap ng pagiging malaya
ang lasa
ng putanginang tiwala
Feb 2016 · 26.4k
Pag-bitaw
madrid Feb 2016
totoo and sinasabi nila
na sa segundong mawalan ka
ng pakialam sa mundo ay bigla nalang itong
magpapakita ng pakialam sayo
na sa oras na maglaho sa iyong pansin ang tagtuyo
biglaan nalang iiyak ang mga ulap para sayo
na sa sandaling binitawan mo ang kamay
ng gusto ng makawala
darating ang ibang kamay na hahawak muli nito
ng mas mahigpit, totoo
ang sinasabi nila

tila mahirap lang maniwala
sa sabi-sabi, sa haka-haka
dahil hindi nga naman ikaw ang nakatayo sa sapatos nila
tiwala

tiwala sa pag-angat ng araw na hindi ka nito bibiguin
tiwala sa iyong pag-dasal sa mga bituin na
kumukuti-kutitap sa gitna ng dilim, ang buwan
na sa mga pagkakataong wala ng pag-asa
ay kakantahan ka ng may bukas pa, totoo
ang sinasabi nila

oo
darating ang mga araw na bigla ka nalang mapapaiyak
sa tuwa, sa lungkot
sa paglisan ng taong iniikutan ng buhay mo
darating ang mga araw na bigla ka nalang mapapaluhod
dahil wala ka ng magawa at wala ka ng matawagan
pero tatandaan mo na hindi ka nag-iisa
dahil nandito ako, ako

ako na kailan ma'y minahal, nagmamahal, at magmamahal sayo
kumapit ka lang
sa aking kamay
sa aking balikat
sa aking katawan
na kahit ulanan ng pasa at sugat
ay ibinibigay ko sayo
ng buong buo

uulitin ko, totoo
ang sinasabi nila
na sa gitna ng kawalan
sa gitna ng pagsuko
sa gitna ng pagbitaw
ito mismo ang maghahanap sayo
siya mismo ang maghahanap sayo
darating at darating ang parte nitong kwento
na bubuo sayo
at muli nanamang iikot ang iyong mundo
pero sa ngayon, sa dito, sa oras na ito
habang naghihintay ka pa,
ay mali pala, dahil hindi tayo maghihintay
at hindi tumigil ang pagtakbo ng oras sa buhay na ito
dahil maliwanag pa sa bumbilya ang kamalian ng nakaraan
bitawan mo lang
at hayaan mo kong isatupad ang aking mga pangako
hindi kita iiwanan, tiwala
magtiwala ka lang

sa huling pagkakataon,
uulitin ko, totoo
ang sinasabi nila
hindi ka nagbubulagbulagan
kundi pinagkakatiwalaan mo lang ako
ng buong isip at buong puso, ako
ako na nagtiwala rin sa Kanya
ako na hindi umasa, ngunit
humawak sa salita ng aking Ama, ako
ito ang tatandaan mo
para sa mga gabing isinisigaw ang mga kaisipang nagtatago mula sa liwanag
para sa mga bukang liwayway na  nagpupumilit humagap ng init ng araw ngunit hindi mahagip ang tapang upang bitawan ang lamig ng gabi
Oct 2015 · 747
Selfish Desires
madrid Oct 2015
I love your words
that at times
they speak of elegance
and spontaneity
and at others
are carved with the utmost thought

I love how you bring them to life
that at every stroke
every roll of your tongue
the words lift from the page
and the light sparks
in the darkest seasons

I love the way they sing
to the deepest part of me
so much so
that I fall in love with every word
for they remind me of you
and of how you and I
are so alike

I love the way they cling to me
like the soulful melody of the birds in spring
or the tender lullabies
that continuously
bring me to sleep

most of all

I love how they remind me
of the gentlest
most daring heart
the only heart that speaks
the language of mine
the only heart that calls
to my deepest
ghostly desires
the only heart that owns mine
and the only heart that belongs
**to me
There are certain things that are yours, and yours alone to cherish.
Oct 2015 · 9.6k
Para Sayo
madrid Oct 2015
Para sa ulap na di ko maabot
Para sa pasang di magamot-gamot
Para sa halik na di malilimutan
Para sa akalang hanggang akala nalang

Para sa ibong di makalipad
Para sa pangarap na di ko matupad
Para sa bukas na di ko na masilayan
Para sa ating hanggang ikaw at ako nalang

Para sa bagyong di matapos-tapos
Para sa hawak na nagmumukhang gapos
Para sa panaginip na di ko mabitawan
Para sa sanang hanggang sana nalang
This one's for you.
Oct 2015 · 1.0k
...
madrid Oct 2015
...
oh, I'm sorry
I thought you meant what you promised
silly me
Oct 2015 · 1.1k
Momentary Lapse of Reason
madrid Oct 2015
"for a minute there...

...you were all I ever wanted"
Oct 2015 · 1.8k
Just Because
madrid Oct 2015
"I will be happy...

...because I deserve to be"
Accept who you are.
If you don't, then who will?
Oct 2015 · 2.3k
Reckless
madrid Oct 2015
"we were brave,

                        for all the wrong reasons"
Oct 2015 · 687
Sciamachy
madrid Oct 2015
I must not weep
I must not break
I must not cry
a must to fake
I must not scream
I must not bleed
they must not see
this part of me

should I
no I shouldn't
should I
oh how redundant
stand up straight
keep a smile
it has for months
become your style

I must not lose
I must not give in
I must not chase
I must not sin
I must not sigh
I must not waver
I must not hope
I must not miss her.
We stopped looking for monsters under our bed when we realized they were inside of us.
Oct 2015 · 656
i can't think of one
madrid Oct 2015
I am drunk as ****
just half past twelve
every soul is asleep
and I'm talking to myself
and yet these lonely lips
scream "why!" into the void
all these ****** vague voices
leave my sanity destroyed.
madrid Oct 2015
I hope* you read this letter
every word between the lines

I hope you read the frustration
with what I could not confide

I hope you read the anger
that's left me such a mess

I hope you read the million questions
rattling my little head

I hope you read these swollen eyes
when they were still yours to see

I hope you read these supple lips
when with yours, would still agree

I hope you read these warm fingers
when yours were still willing to hold

I hope you read the little lies
that left your promises bold

I hope you read the love
inevitably bled

I hope you read the hope
amid all the things unsaid

I hope you read the resentment
of letting go so soon

I hope you read these lines
the last ones I write for you
Oct 2015 · 2.3k
I am up to no good
madrid Oct 2015
"Oo.
Ang tanga.
Tangina ko talaga."
It is ineffable; this feeling, this life.
And yet, in this instance,
I find that there are no other words I can concoct,
no other verses I can construe
to understand, what more, explain,
this underlying chaos
other than a confession, an admission
of how genuinely f**ked up
I am myself.
Oct 2015 · 910
this 4th of October
madrid Oct 2015
gago ka
pinaiyak mo ko

but all I want to do
is scurry down these hollow halls
and scream
******* too
If you only knew.
Oct 2015 · 1.3k
Lifeline
madrid Oct 2015
...and in those darkest hours

you were my star...
It only takes one person, the right person, to make you see the light amid the cold darkness that is your universe.
Oct 2015 · 2.0k
a promise
madrid Oct 2015
"you will always

be worth the risk"
"We accept the love we think we deserve."
Sometimes we need someone to remind us what we're worth; someone who believes in taking chances; someone who won't let go no matter what.
Oct 2015 · 6.7k
Sabaw
madrid Oct 2015
GISING!*
mainit na kape
natutumbang mga mata
nanghihinang katawan
isip ko'y nawawala
isang tinik ng ingay
agad ng napatingin
sa gawing banda roon
anong takot sa dilim
balik tayo sa mga salitang
mala-linya na ang ukit
sa utak kong sabaw
lahat sa paningin na'y marikit
maski nag-iisang ilaw
nagmumukha ng tutubi
pagkat sa pagdating ng bukas
bawal ang magkamali
ilang pahina nalang
kaya't konti pang tiis
minimithing tagumpay
aking makakamit
kaya't higop pa ng kape
puta*, dila ko pa'y nasunog
dasal na lamang ang katapat
maliban sa luha at uhog
kakayanin, kakayanin
hindi nais magtagal
habang sila'y nagsasaya
narito kang nag-aaral
kung ayaw **** maiwan
sa kwartong maputi
kasama ng demonyo
gisingin ang sarili
walang alay na magaganap
hindi maaaring ipabahala
bawal tayong magtawag
diyos-diyosan dito sa lupa
itong mga matang
bumibitaw, bumibitaw
sa gabing ito, walang susuko
maski budhi ko na'y sabaw
For the hell that is upon us.
Oct 2015 · 2.1k
for what it's worth
madrid Oct 2015
minsan hindi ko nalang alam
bat nangyayari ang mga bagay-bagay
sa mga taong mababait
sa mga taong walang kaalam-alam

sadyang di lang ba ko matalino
hindi alisto sa totoo
o sadyang walang sagot
sa aking agam-agam

putangina
minsan hindi ko nalang alam
For EJR
Oct 2015 · 519
Farewell
madrid Oct 2015
With these words engraved,
We bury below a stone,
My heart and your soul.
Goodbye.
Oct 2015 · 1.6k
Pacified
madrid Oct 2015
11:54
Still not awake
This corpse is pleading merces
But is yet to be given
I can hear these bones crackle
At every jolt, every spasm
They keep me asleep
These lullabies

This desolate throat
Delivers none but drought
Painful, but bearable still
These swollen eyes have never before
Felt this oppressed
How I wish they knew rest

This blade, above all
Transcends the screaming sting
*****, pang
These throes that tingle
Stay silent til the morn says so
Oct 2015 · 1.1k
Ghosts
madrid Oct 2015
The mirroring we do.
The projection we play.
Will all come back to haunt us.
Somewhere,
Somehow,
Someday.
Whatever we put out in the world will come back hurling at us.
Oct 2015 · 1.6k
Ricochet
madrid Oct 2015
Sabi mo, di mo kakayanin
Ng wala siya sa'yong tabi

Sabi mo, wala kang magagawa
Pag nakita siya'y, napapangiti

Sabi mo, gusto mo lamang
Tawagin ka niyang "kanya"

Sabi ko, di ko na napansin
Ako pala ang nagsasalita.
Oct 2015 · 758
L.
madrid Oct 2015
L.
It ruined my life
And shattered my bones, *******
Let me go, oh love.
Never again shall it get the best of me.
Oct 2015 · 2.4k
a Dream within a Dream
madrid Oct 2015
I know I am not
But oh, how I long to be
Yours, and yours alone.
At times, the most unreachable thing you can ever imagine is the very thing you most desire.
Oct 2015 · 542
To him.
madrid Oct 2015
I love you inevitably.
Just as sure as the sun rises in the east.
I love you unfailingly.
And without a doubt.
Because there is no other way to love you.
In all your flaws,
I find utter perfection.
That they make you more of a man.
More than anyone else.
Your insecurities. And depressions.
All of them I desire.
Not for myself. But for you.
For I know that without your anxieties,
And curses of hate,
And thoughts of dreadful nights,
That scream into the void and oblivion,
I would not have loved you
Just as I do now.
I love you with all intentions
Of keeping you for myself.
Who,
in his sane mind,
would want to let go?
In all your pain,
Mistrust and paper cuts,
These that make you who you are

I love you.

And that is all.

— The End —