Steve - Hey

Steve - Hey

Steve - Hey how are you doing?

Steve - Hey I’m just trying to get to know you.

Steve - Wow so it’s like that?

Steve - You won’t even give me a chance?

Steve - I know you see the Facebook messages.
                            
Anna - Hey sorry I don’t feel like talking. You are not worth my time or attention.

Steve - I’m good now.

Steve - I found me another lover.

Steve - All I wanted was your time and your attention, but you placed my heart in an emotional detention.

Steve - To me now you just another potential lover I could of loved and cared for. But you loved your ego more.

Anna - I’m sorry.

Anna - At the time you wanted me I was busy.

Anna - I want you now though, even though you have another lover, I envy her. Your persistence showed me you were worth my time. But my ignorance encouraged me to ignore my heart and feed my ego.

Anna -  Now it’s sad to watch you go.                                                  

Anna - I wish I knew better and did better. Now loneliness comforts my ugly mess.

Steve - I guess this is goodbye, because with persistence I also come with, love, patients and loyalty. I am glad I never gave you the best of me.

Steve - My lover truly deserves all of me. My time and my energy, my flaws and insecurities. Thank you for letting me find the best of me.

Steve - You were the light that had to shine in me for me to find the best of me. Your rejection brought out a better version of me.

Steve - Love stings like a blind bee it can kiss anyone and make them feel it slowly. For those it never kisses their hearts forever remain lonely.

If a busy gun takes lives
Then silent leaders do worse
They burn lives, hang knuses on the innocent
Voice your pain or get blessed with a curse
Blood shed Schools
We elected fools
Wrong leaders to lead us
Pushing useless agenda’s
While feeding us propaganda
Halls covered red
thousands of innocent people killed
At the expense of gun reform laws
Watching news with dropped jaws
We sit in silence
while the voiceless die for peace

Hashtag my soul away, so many can see it
I’m waving my hands saying hey look at me
Posting pics, statuses and videos
Can’t do it quietly
I want them all to See
Envy me and make me their fantasy
A few likes on this post is not enough
I deserve to get liked like I’m roylaty
adore me while you stare at the pictures
I spent hours cropping, adding more filters to guard my insecurities
Before I hashtag it, I dress it with perfection
Cut out any ugliness, clean up the mess
Show the world purity
because if they see the negative
their words will expose my insecurities
Behind this screen I found a secured me
That is the side I only want them to see
So I hastag popular tags so they can all see
The better side of me

Anxiety Pills popped
skin temp dropped
Depression sky rocks  
Mind feels numb
Mellow from popping pills I shouldn’t swallow
One pill, two pills, three pills, this is how love kills, chasing cheap thrills, to end up on reels
Pride suffercated, ego tested
Limits ignored
Emotions battle back
as I stimulate myself with techniques my counselor taught me, they don’t seem to help
as my heart still feels empty, this pain truly has taken the best of me, and introduced me to my inner enemy “me”
Breath in and breath out
Deep inside the demons want a chance to shout
Wrist full of memories
Blood loss reminding me of near tradgeties
Anxiety kisses my neck while depression traces its ***** hands all over me
This is a ******* I hoped to not be in
In the end I *** pure emotions

Edger Allan Poe inspired me
Shakespeare educated me
Maya Angelou raised me
These writers created a beast in me
A beast of emotions, words that lack definitions
Only existsting in my expressions

Ideal to the common citizen
I write with a pen full of love, curiosity and pain

Emotions that have gone blind, to common sense, and swallowed a pill full of ego

I realize I am worthless without this pen and this pain

I write of love as if I feel it
I write of Justice as if I need it
I write of human behavior as if I need to fix it

If I am to die let my words live on within your emotions when you read them
Forever and ever I hope you feel them

Sad birds still sing
Sad lovers force smiles through pain
Those who are drowning still try to swim

Conditions, don't give us defenitions
We define conditions with our reactions

You can't control everything, but your reactions will always determine everything

Conflict is trauma promoting trauma
Conflict is love becoming blind to one's inner beauty
Conflict is wasting moments of growth
Conflict is hating self, and showing others how much you hate self
Conflict is aborting peace as you choose to birth evil

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A mother throws away her new born baby

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A wife abused and beaten daily

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A father told he is not allowed
to see his child
Paying child support, while his role as a father is deported, any mistakes he is reported

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A girl told she is not pretty enough to be loved
Comforted by insecurity, abused physically and mentally, wounded emotionally

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A boyfriend proposes to his girlfriend while she walks away leaving him on one knee
Left to face his pain and agony

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A lover sees his lover fall in love with another lover, when he knows that should of been his lover, heart broken as he knows it’s all over  

Nothing hurts more than rejection
A mother told she will never be a mother
Because her womb won’t let her
All she wanted was one son and one daughter

Justice is just is
never changing always broken
the powerful get rewarded the weak get mistreated
morality gets wounded and then healed by fake promises
we gave justice eyes
because it seems to only serve those with lighter pigmentation
hidden in webs of lies, truth is not to be mentioned
justice is just is because no one wants to rightfully serve it

Aching bones, morning soreness
Hit the alarm, ignore the snooze
5 am my body aches, it begs for sleep
I must continue, fight this pain
Even when it hurts I must find a way
This pain I must get through

Set after set
I lift metal, jump hurdles, curl bells,
Aching bones speak to me
begging me to give up
Ignore that last set, try again tomorrow

Here I go, knees shaking, back aching, palms sweating, fingers swollen, head spinning
I lift that last set because I am a warrior, a soldier, a fighter and not a quitter

I am afraid that you are falling in love with the expectations you have of me

While you ignore the toxic version of me
The loud, broken, desperate version of me

You don’t really see me, you see job offers
a few kids, a wedding ring, new homes, new cars  
While you ignore my deep scars

I am afraid you are falling in love with who you want me to be

While ignoring the real me, the trauma suffering, addict struggling, broken soul, who is afraid to love

You are ignoring the angry man who needs therapy but decides it’s better to feed his anger and throw his emotions at the end of liquor bottles

The man who your mother warned you would break your heart.
I am a victim of my pain, but you ignore that because you see something within. You want me to be that perfect man of your dreams, that you forget to face your nightmares

You hide my scars, feed me compliments while preaching to me about your biological timeline, lying and telling me everything will turn out fine if I find a job that makes a lot of money, bought a new car, a new home with a picket fence, change my accent, dress and act a certain way   
Please don’t try to save me
Save your imagination for thinking it can transform me to meet your expectations

I am me and I am to be loved like me

I need peace more than I need my next breath
For if I leave this world better than I found it
Then I have done my duty
Giving up my life for freedom and liberty
Freeing those in captivity
This is the cry of a soldier
Whose heart is bolder
Sacrificing everything
Feasting on pain while starving for world peace

Today we cried
Tears of fear
While looking at our scars
Memories of a past so bitter to peace
Now we look at each other
Torn apart, broken hearts
Missing parts creating ugly art
How do we grow?
when pain is the only thing raising us
Insecure so we can’t trust, trust
Numb so we can’t feel what’s real
Lying to ourselves that we got it all figured out
Deep inside we suffocate
When our tears run dry, we feast on other people's vulnerability,
ignoring our reality as we hide behind our fantasy
Only to wake up in our nightmare
Our fears now define our reality

You are the drug of my choice
the strength in my voice
a thief in the night
you stole my heart on sight
robbed me of sight so I can only love you with my soul
I gave you my all and more  
I sacrificed my imagination and filled it with your sensation
Addicted to you I am
like a an addict is to their needle of joy
I get a great high when I am around you
a depressive low when I am not with you
I am addicted to your flaws
in love with your insecurities
you bring out the best in me
every kiss is as powerful as every breath I take
I need your touch like the veins that connect to my heart
without that I am like an empty vessel with no purpose
You are simply my addiction and I will never seek treatment
In you I find therapy, you have taken the best of me

Seeking refuge
only to end up being used
cheap labour, low wages
slammed in small cages
stereotyped due to my difference
I pray for deliverance
government blames our growth on their lack of security
just all lies hiding behind their deepest insecurity
afraid to see me be who I was meant to be
blind to your scrutiny,
I search for liberty
in a land where I get robbed of dignity
immigrant is what they label me

Absolute abomination is abortion
Betraying baby bodies ending up brutally Buried
Concluding a life currently forming
Death all up in your stomach
Energy draining decision, a life ending before a beginning
Fetus fates determined by lawmakers lacking empathy
God crying at the death of his creation
How will you feel when you face the face of those you aborted
Ignorance made you feel important
Judges slam hammers making decisions to determine the value of a fetus
Killing innocent humans not thinking about their futures
Life feels pain as those we let go still live within  
Mistakes made should never end up in blood
No one will know you tell yourselves, but God knows all
Opportunities oppressed, always end up leaving you depressed  
Pain within makes you go insane, nightmares of old scars
Quite homes, cold hearts, broken souls of bodies that were torn apart
Raw emotions of killers live in their insecurity, just listen closely  
Silence entertains the minds which live in regret from taking lives
Tomorrows full of sorrows
Unmatched emotions with lovers that went astray
Value life and life will value you
Weapons forged in your feeble mind tell you to fight for your rights
X-rays of broken hearts hidden behind broken bones
You played God, you killed to avoid pain, now your soul dies hard  
Zest for life diminished as sorrow takes charge

One does not need to be born of royal birth
to realize their nobality
Their existence alone shows great triumph
Over life’s pain and reality
Deep inside our hearts
we are all Kings and Queens
Destined for a greater good
To serve and protect humanity
We are all of royal blood
Coming from a nation called earth
Fighting for peace and tranquility
While we objectify the laws of gravity
Letting our souls fly into a deep blue sky
As angels kneel when we Fly by

Hate filled minds
Living life in rewind
Drunk on the future so they wine
Crying about a past that had them powerful
Praying on hate and killing others less superior
Hating themselves for being more infrior
Hiding behind religion, saying it's God they serving,
what God you know condones killing, hating, and oppression

They serve a God with no vision
Wearing capes to hide their ambiguous faces
Yelling that they hate all races
These are the same co-workers who say they love all races
But behind closed doors
Pray to burning torches

Know that your written words echo in my soul
They touch my heart and never let go
Leaving fingerprints
evidence that you moved my heart and exposed my deepest emotions
Thank you for sharing your passion
Through your passion I found a voice in my silence, knowing that you have spoken
I need your words like a heartbeat
I pray to never stop breathing
as long as you keep writing

I feel 2 weak to be too strong
How long did I hold on? 2 long
She played my heart like a violin
Twisting and plucking 2 strings
2 many feelings for me 2 just leave
I tried and I tried, I kept coming back 2 her
My heart wouldn’t let me go far
Now here I stand hoping she wouldn’t keep me waiting for 2 long

January was never in a hurry, relationships seemed a bit too scary  
February always left me feeling lonely
March left scars and forced me to act needy
April lied and tricked me to fall in love with fools like you
No I actually liked you  
I started Idolizing fantasies
blind to see that it was us who were never meant to be  
May came around and exposed what we pretended to be
June made us lay under covers, and lie that we were lovers
July made you lie that you found another lover
It was me you wanted but couldn't find me
So you looked for me in others
All you found was broken hearts full of scars
Bleeding for your attention, while lacking complete satisfaction  
August had you feeling uncomfortable, heat in your veins
Pain in your seduced membrane, just smile and stay in the main frame
Pretend like you feel no pain
September had you missing me, dancing with your memories
I was love and you acted like you never needed me
October had you feeling lonely, while your soul became empty  
November left your heart feeling colder, while your ego got smaller
In December I was all that you could remember

Water flows in the heart that knows
Pride inflated chest, humility hasn’t shot him yet
Walking around with a lighter nose
Heaven knows where egos go
When pride is demoralized to its lowest low
Live life like a fool
always want to know more
A hungry scholar will educate his mind
To study ancient history
Because even he knows, he knows nothing at all
To avoid the fall
he needs to know about those who fell before  
Knowledge is power and ignorance takes it away weakening the soul, forcing you to fall
So which will you feed more?
your humility or your ego

                                                               ­        - Tuffy M

My hands left marks on your body
I never meant to leave marks on your body!!
Place pain on your body
I see you cry, but I sit in darkness lonely
You were my veins to my dark heart
Now My soul is aching my heart is breaking
I feel your body shaking
fear comforts you and misery wipes your tears
twisted you are, emotions expressed while my fists pressed on your face
leaving prints
with every hit, I get a flashback to when I was a child and powerless
this is dark words, poetry through the eyes of an abuser
a heart user, emotion killer, love hater, pain enforcer
it is I who dares to care
I hurt you before
why do you return to me like a wrong address placed on an envelope
coming back for more
like the first time wasn't enough
poetry through the eyes on an abuser who was once a victim
I guess pain is just a cycle, what we feel is what we give
Inflicting pain is my only way of letting you know I love you
Love through the eyes of an Abuser

African soul child
Eating dust for dinner
Drinking ***** water
Poverty is your richness
Survival is your blessing
Too many deaths you witnessed
Torn between dying and living
Yet you still choose living
Breath air polluted with gas fumes
Big diamond digging machines
Repping your grounds for more minarals
Witnessed less births and more funerals
Oh African soul child

If I became your ex
What would you tell the world
Would you tell them a side of me that loved you
Would you tell them about the late night texts
Would you tell them about the 12 hour conversations that ended when the sun came up
Would you tell them about how I would pick you up, go on random trips
Hold you tight when fear was near
Wipe your tears
Trace all your scars
Would you tell them about the dreams I lost while trying to make your dream a reality
Would you tell them about the hours I worked just to get you the finest things
Would you tell them about the insecurity wall you helped me build over the years
Would you tell them about how toxic I became  
While your heart fed me poisoned love
Or would you tell them about an expectation you set so high, that no one could attain
Better yet to build your confidence would you  tell them how a terrible person I am  
but leave out the part in which you helped me become who I am

Let me save you the time
and just leave you with this

If you chose to love a past you couldn’t get past you shouldn’t of committed to making a worse past, a past that promoted demoralizing a broken  heart, a past that left scars a surgeon could close
Crying out for closure in a room full of hunted memories!

So please don’t read a book you not willing finish,
me and you are the authors to my insecurity

Pride dug a hole in their relationship
Deeper and deeper they dug
Silence was the casket they fell in
No echos of love
Endorsing anger as their new form of emotion
Blaming each other like old fools
Manipulated souls
Feeling destroyed
as pride became their voice of reason
Leaving no choice
Obeying it as they both chose to be (right) no love (left)
Promises ignored
Both robbed of happiness
Pride introduced them to emptiness
Both stressed and depressed
Seeking validation for their emotions
Turning to negativity to find satisfaction
The devil between them
Comfortably cuddling with their souls
Creating a divided union lacking a destination
pride left them Lost with no direction
Pride destroyed their beautiful connection
It destroyed their promises and hopes for a bright future
Suffering to see the sunlight while living in darkness

I
Miss
       You
           Tonight
  And every second
             you are not in my
                                      Sight

Numbers speak louder than words
a thousand to a million
You are still sleeping with your skeletons
Trying to fit in like a blind Chameleon
History hunts your very own existence
Drunk on emotional substance
Abused so many times
190 to be exact, pain you attract
Matter of fact, these numbers **** you inside
Number of lovers in the past one too many
Heart touched by so many,
But inside you feel empty
Number of breakups and makeups
One too many, demoralized and destroyed
Your heart deployed to war with your emotions
It had never returned
Killed in combat
Fighting and dodging Cupid’s arrows
While drinking from the cup of sorrow

Insecurity made him paint her beautiful face with bruises
Chocking her with so much passion
Anger his motive, their love became an illusion
Blood boiling, heart pumping, veins popping
Tears flowing, mascara running
while their child's crying
She became a victim of abuse
Getting used, destroyed, betrayed
By the one she loved, adored, and praised

She cried out loud
Love is not supposed to hurt this bad
As she traced the bruises he left on her body
A signature to let her know that he owns every inch of her body

He is the reason she will forever be lonely

Roots of kings and queens
Subjected to slavey
Diamond filled graves
Digging deeper ending up ******
Government fornicating with corruption
Birthing an evil nation
War Everywhere for a nation going nowhere
Faith filled churches praying for peace
While the people are sleepless
Anger and pain is all they can release

Life is a bulletproof vest full of stitches
Shot at on every block
While opportunity knocks
Misery rocks as it seeks company
When it does it also invites empathy
Sometimes empathy shows up
And other times  it doesnt

The Homeless hug blocks for comfort
While the fortunate beg for time
Is this all worth it?

Is dying rich more valuable than living broke?
Or is living broke more valuable than dying rich?

I ask this because a wound cut deep knows know value of who it hurts

Pain is ignorant, it knows know race or social economic status
It’s only agenda is to break us or make us

When death comes for us
No bulletproof can save us

You better love her more than I love her
Heal all her scars
Speak to her insecurities
Be her security
Show her loyalty
Respect and honor who she wants to be

I raised her
now it's your turn to raise her beautiful gifts
Love them and cherish them
Embrace them and adore them

Love her and she will love you more
She will never let you go

Time was my greatest friend when I had you
And my greatest enemy when I didn’t have you

It was the beginning to the end
And the end to the beginning

It consumed my thoughts
While flirting with my imagination
Introducing me to deeper emotions

As my heart faced a deep commotion

At first his hand prints were soft
Touching me gently, slowly and softly
Then his ego got fed
They became hard
Found strength to swing

My face the target
Swinging and swinging
He hit with a passion

I was his lover and his target
I forgave and he reloaded
Bullets in hands
Shot and my heart he destroyed

My inside pain became seen by many
Bruises and bumps, cut lips and black eyes
They asked why I never left
I told them he took something from me
He took my heart and left me feeling empty
To fill that void I replaced his love with my pain
Some called him an abuser
I called him my lover

To me it was all the same

What is Justice

What is justice
Does it have a color,
does it have a temperature
The blacker the shooter the louder the news
The tighter the noose
Equality seems to download slower
for those it doesn’t favor
Section 8 flats raise ghetto minded soldiers
Trained to live in prison cells
While leaving empty sits in classrooms
Mothers raising fathers
because their fathers left them,
now live in prisons,
physically, emotionally & mentally
That means when they have their kids they will probably leave them

What Is Justice
Generational curses bless the defenseless
Praising violence because slave masters
Programmed them to hate knowledge
Think less and work more labour after labour
While slave masters stole roots away from their family trees,
then told them to go figure out their identities,
Black Kings and Queens demoralized and carried in shackles, to rebel they now wear more ice than a cold fridge,
painted in movies as villains but have more knowledge than those that run universities, but stuck behind the walls of justice fighting all kinds of adversities,
like starting a race with no legs to run with,
stuck in one place, asking themselves what is justice


What is Justice
Is justice a word we chase in a world imprisoned by the thought of equality?
it doesn’t work if it doesn’t end in a tragedy, wearing hoodies, selling cigarettes, simply driving, could determine the end of you, living everyday under pressure like living through an interview, or facing the end of a loaded barrow,
Yelling please don’t shoot, while the one holding the gun comes to take your tomorrow, these black tears have cried till they have ran dry, social justice tried and still couldn’t change justice
now we challenge the notion of which life matters more, black or blue
This world got no clue
acting like history never took place, in a race of race, forgetting those who sacrificed for us to win the global race
how much more should the dark skinned give to get an ounce of freedom

What is justice
Is justice a word or a curse to the darker skinned, is justice determined based on one’s pigmentations, causing deeply rooted segregation, “all man are created equal” but we forgot about the sequel, in the end it tells us that we are not equal...


So... What is justice?

Early morning birds chirping
Singing melody’s of peace
Looking out into the forest
I see beauty in your face
Africa has a smell that no one can erase
A smell that echos love into your soul  
Life so simple, life so inspiring and incredible
Don’t believe what the discovery channel told you about a land that existed before any other
Africa the mother of the earth
Birthing billions of souls
who left it but still live in it
It’s blood runs deep in our souls
Skin shades might change
but our roots are deep Within
When Africa cries we feel it’s pain  
When Africa smiles we rejoice with pure joy
Colonizers tried to change it but it changed them
They stole its music, passion, material good, it’s minerals, traditions, and norms
Taking even its greatest queens and kings
Tribal men and women
They tried to **** its joy but it still smiled through the pain
Enslaving it’s people still couldn’t **** it existence
Africa
Birthed in resistance and molded by resilience, inspired by diligence, fueled by consistence
We are strong, powerful, and courageous  
Africa the birthplace of the human race
With our palms pressed let’s say Grace
As we pray for peace

Oh mother land
How I miss you
You gave me life
And blessed me with culture
Baptized me in tradition
Nurtured me in love
Sweet Africa, sweet Africa
How I love you