~Love~

I never knew that feeling
A word without meaning
…A stranger to what I felt…
Thought it’s strange that I knew it so well

~Life~

I walk by with you as I talk about you
…Existence is a mere essence…
It’s the life underneath my roots
My whole being is defined of what I decide about you

~Choices~

I kept on thinking of you
A mystery in every event I stumble upon
Nonetheless your part of me that i fully submit
Facing and standing still
In all the consequences and risk
I have brought upon,
In the end
Despite all those obstacles
I know deep within me
There will come a time
I’ll be able to dance
…In rhythm of contentment…

~Dreams~

You’re in my fantasy
…You’re in my Jar of unfulfilled wishes…
I walk in your clouds of heavenly sky
Reality slaps me too many times
Yet no matter how painful reality is
I still go to your realm
And dream an endless dream
Of my unfulfilled wonderings
Wishing & hoping

~Alive~

Living is as much as fading
Purpose of what I suppose
Is just another make-up prose
Of my days
Principles are timeless
…Endless…
Old yet golden
Though some are forgotten
throughout the pages of history
faded
But then they're relived now
Through experiences
As life goes on and on
As you live by
In its circling Journey

~Freedom~

I can’t be with you
as I am chained
Much controlled
Much reserved
Much more refined
…As if I’m bound to be blocked…
Locked within a nut shell
I guess being free isn’t allowed
without hard labor



© 2013 Pax

Brief moments, temporarily
to build it lasting needs hard work

To
you,
I
found
comfort
to
my
weary
restless
heart
.


© pax

Walls upon walls of soundless treatment
I talk to the voiceless whisperer.

promise! This will be the last...

True artist is not all about the talent,
it’s the art of loving your craft.

Truth holds many faces, like how fractured mirror show multiplicity.

A prisoner of your own doing
Selfishness is a way of avoiding
Stay fair by merely existing
Pain and craving
Lock and stored in a well-guarded place
Hunger made it hollow in this well hidden base
Loving from a distance
Shielded by masquerade
Person in charade.

The wounds of my past
lingering and wondering
through the days of my life
then you came along
and heal this dying soul.
This magic coated masked melted like candles.
Your resonated flames made it into liquid nitrogen.
Making it unattainable
for me to grasp and hold into.
It evaporated in the sun kissed skies.
My black salted tears evaporated
By your brightly warm glow.
I feel alive and free.
The wounds faded into scars
Leaving a mark of lamented past
Reminding me that I’ve learned.
I came back to this wondrous existence with you at my side
I bid farewell to the dying lands of grief
And promise not come back
As long as your light and wisdom shines on me
Never fading.


© Pax

let go of insecurities and judgment upon self,
embrace acceptance.



© Pax

In my darkest days, I held you beneath my warmth.
You indulged me with your feverish hunger.
You embraced me with your piercing emotions.
You were immune to my changeable disease.

I came to a realization that you were my muse,
the best rainbow I received……….

You told me that I was part of your soul.
To me you’re the fuel to my rusty engine,
The energy to my thirsty being,
And the light of my darkened soul.


© Pax

A little life is what I asked
A little love is what I wanted
but you give space
Emptiness I didn't need.



© Pax

Sometimes being alone is much better
than in the crowd of judgmental tongue.



© Pax

.
I’m
Drowning with disappointments.
I feel breathless with regrets.
My heart is on life-support.
I’m stupid and very dense
for repeating the same mistake
over and over
again
.




© Pax

I’m not ugly,
I’m unique.
Same way as you are.


© Pax

uncertainty is best left off in
the distance of silence
...



© Pax

Why are you trying to be someone that you’re not?
Why are you pretending to be happy that you’re really not?
Why do you keep on lying to yourself?
Why is your life very complicated?
Or you’re just making it too complicated for us to bother?
Maybe you’re just emotionally damaged by your own selfish doing?
I get it, that you’re hard to deal with, I get that.
Still you don’t have to push us away.
You don’t have to be so alone.
You know we’re here to listen and guide you towards a better way.
We stick to you no matter what they say and what you’d become.
Because we know it’s still you, it’s a part of you.
We love you just the way you are, nothing can change that.
If you gone to a bad start, then let’s start a new better one.
Maybe for you it’s too late to start a better one, but life’s too short.
Let’s enjoy it, lived the way we want it to be.

Ha, you’re a late bloomer you say.
Nah, you’re just one of millions out there.
People learned new things every day;
it’s never too late to learn. That’s one of my principles.

You’re doing good, listen to your good side.
Listen to you pure soul. Hear its plea.
Flip every bad into an optimism to strive for the better.
You know we can, because we believe in ourselves that we can.
Come let’s do this together start a new beginning.
Free from prejudice and judgments.
Let’s thanks sorrow and pain.
Without them we can never achieved who we are today.
Life isn’t easy, we know,
but we learned.


*© Pax

Trap in an isolated era.
View me as faceless persona
Of make-belief identities
In this world filled with fantasies.

I write because I am tired,
To pen the burden in this poet’s ride.



*© Pax

My heart is in throbbing tone
My hands are as cold as stone

Sleepless, I become restless
Shortness of air, I become breathless
Controlling emotions seems helpless
An emotional distress

In the realization of my hyperventilation
I get dizzy and sleepy
My mind is on overdrive worry

Voices have strained my mind
And the Echoes have drained my body
Into a slumpy Winnie.


*© Pax

Blood soaked hands in the land where I am forgotten
          -   The ugly amongst the fallen.
I am the coward amongst the monster.
      My plea for strength didn’t matter,
        for every challenge I get weaker.
More scared than I was, so I hide fast.

As I flee, never did I enjoy any glee.
Freedom is not free.
In this land I bleed with my creed.
Stupid me!
|
Yet I don’t mind, I am just one of the foolish kind.

*© Pax

Damnation of the Mind
In Society’s eyes, I commit a Crime.

Freedom mistook as a Sin
“For I’m always right”, says the Red Queen.

I scattered my scrappy writes
In this forest full of lies

I am as good as dead
For I am never needed
Naked to the bone
A far away star, I am alone.

“I am your salvation”, says the Holy King
I oblige for that’s what I think is right, Lamenting
Oh, Holy king, I can’t stop wondering
The man made crisis keeps on repeating
Driven by powerful Need
They hunger for what they don’t Need

I am in a brink of exhaustion
Many hides in the facade of beautiful illusion
Creation for an easy solution

Abundance is slowly fading
Our soulful purity is slowly dying.

*© Pax

What is right from wrong?
What is worth keeping from what’s meant releasing?

From a dark veil you hide
Obligated, you abide
A silent prison you call home
That’s life in this dome

Wield by a strong patrol
Withheld by unyielding control

Flying has a price
It always has, a bounty to arise

Dominated,
Cultivated,
Motivated
By a driven force
Subside our hunger course
From the will to adapt
For what’s just right, we tap.














.
.
.
:my Quotes:
Some things are our guidance, but it doesn’t meant to withheld us from swimming.

*© Pax

Trapped in the glass
Food for your tray
I am the water that filled your thirsty soul

You're just a starve being who hungers for more
Can’t you see, I am slowly dying
My children is declining
Pollutant is destroying my beauty
day by day
I wonder if you care

I hope many of you understand
That my rage goes out of hand
That’s just how I am
Nature’s call in changes
Of the climate
and more often of what you’ve done

In time you’ll see how important I am
How you’ve lost a part of me
That cares for you
I am not selfish
All my blessings is free for the taking
But it is never yours alone

You outnumbered my children
To the point that you hunted them to extinction

You polluted my shores
To the point that I lost my blissful purity

You poisons each other's soul
To the point that I have taken the destructive consequences

Some things are hard to learn
But that doesn’t mean you’ll repeat the same mistakes
over and over again
as if it’s a good thing
it never was and never will be

I am dying, how I wish you care
…



*© Pax