Don't you love when you get compliments?
When someone calls you pretty, maybe gorgeous, attractive...**** even
What about being told you're made for *******
That you have wide hips, and a nice neck to wrap their hands around
Have you ever been complimented on how sweet you cry in agony?
Or how beautifully you suffer?
I grew up with my mother,
She neglected me
and I was nothing but not a son to her
Was just like every other of her kind
No, she would not buy me gifts
Nor jewelry, nor would she buy makeup
Or ever think about it for that matter,
Her money had a different purpose...
She would spend every last cent if even it meant
We wouldn't have enough to pay rent
And I would cry every last tear because I wished not to be here...
and I'd lament...
Even if it meant that I would gain a slap to the face for being a disgrace
Even though my mother, Grace, was always lost and didn't know her place
Yes, she was lost, her parents didn't want her
Maybe she has no sympathy
She was treated so badly, but maybe she deserved it
She would talk about how she worked for everything she had
But she didn't have much
Maybe she had no sympathy because even though being through the same,
She quickly rid of me
And for what? Some thing called ******? To sit still, yet spin?
I suppose my everlasting pain and suffering to her was money in her pocket and something she no longer had to endure
Maybe she was cursed with a sickness, perhaps I was the cause,
Nonetheless she assumed my agony and absence was the cure,
Where she is in life? I'm not sure
But I wonder almost all the time
Because no person I'm with now, no none, can I have a relationship as pure
It was hell, yes
But I would escape to it in a ring of a bell
At the snap of a finger,
At the snap of a wrist,
And yes, I know very well the sound that such a thing would make,
Oh the first time I shivered and watched another girl shake
With a demon above her
Who shoved her
Who started with saying he loved her,
A demon inside a man
Who's greed and lust captured his image perfectly
He was a worthless creep
I now cope with this,
Because that's my daily life
Men who have a wife, but still desire others, especially those that do the opposite of admire in their presence.
With each passing day, the surprise lessens
Because these men, they beat it into us
They say they'll teach us some "lessons"
And so we listen because we've already been so abused that we can't take anything more physical
So we let them feed their greed and we wind up broken or dead and still carry their evil seed
One thing that can build light in such a time
If even from such an evil thing
Is a prosperous life, a human being,
But no, we go through the pain of giving,
And we don't get a prosperous life,
Because like I said
My relationship here... will never be as pure...
as it was...when I was with Grace.
So these men
They take our creations
They use them against us
If we slipped up or messed up
Or did the slightest thing they didn't like,
They would bleed, and be beat, until, they just ripped off their feet
Then, those monsters, would destroy a baby that they saw as a toy of influence
But yet they don't need such an idea,
This is their world
And they are the ruthless rulers, raging rampant
In this dark, dark, brutal, destructive encampment
I continue my routine
Awaiting my next tear for when I break
but until then, I shiver, and I shake