Chris 5d
I'd love if I could tell,
That I wish you well,

But, (and there's always butts)

Any wish I have to pay for,
I reserve to myself.
lovejunkie Dec 2018
it could not have been
more than 3 or 4 minutes tops
but during that time every
move that a made and
thought that i had were
likes giants steps away
from heaven and toward
****, and i hated it, betraying
how i may not have changed
as much as i like to think i
have, but i, something dark
deep inside me, that rage that
began to swirl and grow as
a tween, it is still there, it lurks
and sometimes it feels too good
not to let the rage out on someone
and i look for people being treated
wrong just so i have an excuse to
let all my vasoconstrictors rise
and then that feeling when they
dilate again, after the rage just
comes out, and after we all
get kicked out, so i wrecked
a fun evening for a bunch of
people i throw up in the alley
behind the bar, the exact same
place i threw up so many times
when i was younger, but this time
from all the norepinepherine making
me shake violently, i even smell this
musky smell and realize it's coming
from me, everything in overdrive.

i become like some cave man
sometimes still, even after all
i've learned, even after how i
like to think i've grown, these
things still happen sometimes
and i am scared, really scared
when they do, not during the
fights, but afterwards, and
very late into the night.

i acted more like i was drunk
or on something tonight much
more i think than if i was drunk
or high, and it's 5:20 AM and the
adrenaline is still coursing, my
benzodiazapines don't work
my bubba kush doesn't work,
man, flight fight or freeze and
i don't know what to do right now
my friend who was really disappointed about missing the show told me that it takes a lot more courage to walk away than it ever does to fight, and that made me feel worse than anything, but i'm glad because i think if i forget anything else about tonight, i'm going to remember what he told me, and remember the undeniable veracity of it when hearing it during the moment.
Danny Dec 2018
Throughout my whole life I was taught not to feel
Discouraging put downs had first spun this wheel
Later the numbness extended to violence
Inequity towards me was stuffed until silenced
This armor had left me with no wounds to heal

This type of existence proved no way to live
My walls were torn down by my wife and my kids
Sensing such weakness and seeking to profit
She sunk the knife deep into me and she lost it
With shoves from my daughter to anguish I slid.

A child gets the access to do the most damage
Her taking advantage of weakness was savage
The lies and deceiving had gone on for years
Once I could see that it brought me to tears
This wound that she made will take so long to bandage
Sophia Nov 2018
'i'll stick with you'
until there's no more stick left.

'don't be afraid to talk to me.'
until i scare you away.

'i'll listen to what you have to say.'
until you don't want to hear anymore.

'you're not selfish.'
and yet you still walk away.

'i won't argue.'
and my opinion remains the same.

'you're beautiful'
who else says that?

'you're sweet and kind'
then why am i writing this poem?

i hate being friendly
when they're friendlie to me.
Tyler Matthew Nov 2018
I've been told that
if I see something beautiful
(a flower, for instance),
I should leave it alone,
let it grow and bloom.
But, I'm only human,
and I've spent a long time
holding on to nothing.
So I say pick the flower,
hold it, smell it, love it,
and stop wasting your life
wanting something that is
right before your eyes.
Personally, I think the title is better than the poem, but I posted it anyway.
ren Nov 2018
your heart is so out of place,
you don’t know who to love
nor who to take
and it makes you want to cry
but you go ahead and lie
just to put a smile on her face.
you tell her you’re alright
because you just want to keep her safe,
she doesn’t realize all you do for her
so maybe it’s best just to leave,
instead of wasting your time on her.

her: selfish, only does what’s best for herself.
Francie Lynch Nov 2018
As a young man in love,
I was selfish.
I walked with you,
I shared food,
I slept with you,
It was my insatiable thirst;
Desire, and
I needed to gulp it,
At any cost,
For survival.
Perhaps you felt likewise.
I didn't know.

Now, being older,
Which I do
Out of love,
I do for you.
Stephen Nov 2018
How did Love,
Of all things,
Become so entangled with selfishness?
The poets used to write pages just to admire their beloved’s hair;
Now they just write lines lamenting their own unfulfilled desires.
Love used to mean
Wishing someone happiness
Wishing a wonderful life for the admired one;
But now,
Love means cursing your beloved,
Or feeling sorry for yourself,
If love is not returned.
How do we get back to real Love?
How do we get back
To admiring each other,
Caring for each other,
Wishing the best for each other?
How do we teach
(and learn)
To truly Love each other
Without requirement?
How do we teach
(and learn)
That Love,
Real, True Love
Does not ask for anything in return.
Daniel H Shulman Oct 2018
I wish that all mirrors could be windows,
Having had quite enough introspection.
I want to live in the world the world knows,
The world that is more than my reflection.

Trapped behind walls seeing nothing but me,
These mirrors have cost me my perspective.
If I’m all there is, who am I to be?
Solipsism is no man’s objective.

I peer through the glass right back into my face.
I don’t even know if I’m seen behind.
Windows are mirrors to the human race,
But the reflection in mine makes me blind.

I wish that all mirrors could be windows,
But scared the world won’t like what I expose.
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