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Axel Nov 2019
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When the thunder passed
its negative charges,
it went right in me
and now I live with it.
As I grow old, I realised that I tend to plant my flowers without even watering them but I know they're going to withered and I still do it anyway.

I grow old and I see things in different perspectives, I see fire as water, smoke as fog, summer as winter, and I promised I have fought and now I feel down, very down, like an ocean-deep-down but who gives a **** anyway.
i live with it
?
Axel Jun 2019
?
Is it bad that I need your arms to be my blanket to keep me warm through December?
Am I needy if I want your breath on my neck to be
the live giver to my butterflies in my body?
Why should we run if our legs are numb?
How do I finish if the lines doesn't even exist?
If honey can be sweet, why shouldn't we?
+
Axel Sep 2019
+
When the birds are singing tomorrow
While the sun is entering my room,
I'll wake up with water surrounding my place
But once I inhale and exhale,
Bet that I'll win every race.

Even if the dirt wants to dirt me,
Let it be, because I'm standing straight
And my eyes are now awake
From my heaviness sleep
And I'm fully ready to face everything.
Keep staying positive
1%
Axel Mar 2020
1%
Here I am, fighting for the last breath
so I could write about you
and I could wonder about
how I used to see you as a stranger
but now I see you as a beautiful
rare flower.
Axel Dec 2020
our romance linger around the room
and our eyes dancing in the crowd
while you're sitting
and I'm leaving out.
Axel Aug 2019
when did we become a stranger?
walking pass by but we didn't even
see each other.
when did I become so wanting,
wanting to write about you
when all you do is running?
i love you,
like I always do,
but why can't you?
:(
Axel Apr 2019
Bring the guns
Sharp the knives
Only live once
But I'm wasting my time;
Bring the rose
Pick the daisy
Soft, so fragile
Cry like a baby.
Axel Sep 2020
I called you in the middle of the night,
heard you singing my lovely lullaby.
I'm roaming freely in your mind
24 hour, every time.
still can't move on huh? couldn't be me
8
Axel May 2019
8
I'd prefer 8 hours with myself
than 8 minutes with them,
I should be happy but I'm happy on my own
I should be laughing but I am joy when I'm alone
is this temporary
or permanent?
I'm scared, someone hold me,please,
tightly, untill I can't breathe

someone help me,please
tighten the grip
make me believe
make me trust in me
make me true
make me feel truly free.
I love being alone, so what?
Axel Jan 2019
a mountain with a full of stories,
a boy once lived with a full of laughter
he used to do that
but not anymore.

a strawberry once picked
from a beautiful young boy,
but the sun was too hot,
and the clouds faded,
so there he was sitting
with a strawberry on his hand
and he flew with tears
and went to another land.
a deep ocean with a deep meaning.
Axel Jun 2019
Take me down town
The place that love first bloomed
Tail of the story ended with the boy making a move
Touch me by my hands and I can already tell you i love you
oops baby I love you
-little mix
Axel Jul 2019
Nothing was attached when we met
and I sure as hell
that you weren't the orchid
that I was searching.

The moon wasn't shining
when I first saw you walking with a bursting orange shirt and I promise you that I never felt that you were a meaningful poetry.

But for a few days, your face lit up my boring world, your jokes shined my darkest river, your smile was the sunrise that I was waiting to see,
and my mind was your place that you're always going to be.

But these past few minutes, your voice is the most unpleasant sound I've ever heard, your eyes are the most boring thing in the world, your face is the last thing I want to see.
I don't want to feel like this but I don't want myself to get hurt.
Go on, I'm not forcing you to love me, because I know, all your life, you've always loved her and not me.
goodbye, I wish u the best, hope u found love and hope she can give you the things I couldn't.
Axel May 2019
I wish that life could be easy
Like a toddler cries for a drop of milk
From his mother's body
Axel Mar 2019
when the rainbow appears,
the birds fly above and the clouds disappear
the memory strikes in and the the feeling leans
the moon shines through the windows and leave me glowing in the dark

the stars are align and the light is making me blind,
the flowers bloom as the sun hits
my heart beats as your smile is in line
my eyes are closed when I feel your touch
and my roses are velvet when you're smiling too much

it took a year to get away
it took a decade to drive away
it took a while to step ahead
but it took only a second,
just a second to write this poetry
just a second to write a song
just a second to imagine
and just a second and you can see me beside you in tears that are already clear

an angel,a devil;
a Paradise with a little bit of Hell
a pair of eyes and I can hear a bell
a gleam of smile and I can already tell
a gold star that I see when I look up
a gold moon that I want after a break up

Aphrodite with a little bit of Zeus,
that's me
that's my personality
that's how I breathe
that's how I live
and that's how i live within the breeze

a glimpse of sunshine on Friday night
a storm of fire on 11:31 in the night
a forgettable memory
a short-term period
a pout on the lips that I crave
a white crystal skin that is brave
and 7 perfect things that I admire
and a blue heart that I always desire
but you're not the one that'll stay
you're not the one that's warm
because you're just a forgettable, a lovely-hate alarm.
Axel May 2019
i should've left the curtains open
so you can see what's underneath
my body and see
the shattering heart after you left me.
Axel Jan 2019
here I am, looking to the sun
trying to get into my afternoon thoughts;
trying to find the right words to my poetry;
trying to find the right tune to my music;
trying to find the right right one to my heart.
Axel Jan 2020
When he said
that he could be something he's not,
I believed,
I believed that his storm
could be cleared
And that his eyes
could look only into me
Just me, and only me.

When he's inside,
I lost control and said
yes to heaven and no to me
I lost control and let him play
like I'm his poker cards and tell
all of his friends that he won
a game of bet.

We slowed dance in a ballroom
and I put my head onto his shoulder
closing my eyes
and let the dance happen
even when he's on his phone
texting her while dancing with me.
Axel Jan 2019
every sunday
every gloomy day
I'd go to your home
but you're always not there.

but a book
that you gave
just made my lotus
bloom in a different way.

so I keep
thinking that
you're running
I keep thinking
that you're flying,
but the truth is
you're lying
and you're laying
in your bed
with the flowers
that she gave
and the doorbell ring
is just a song
that you listen
and forget.

so I drove
down to town
to the supermarket
and asked
'where can I find the aisle for happiness'
they said
'I don't think we have that here,
or anywhere else',
that's right
it never existed
in my life
and in my melody.
"try to be positive",they said, but it's hard, because it's not in me.
Axel Mar 2019
She's smoking a cigar that is barely able to burn,
She's tasting the bitter pain of the dark yet a glimpse of sweet in a short and dangerous cigar with a hope that the tables are gonna turn in a second.

She coughed a dark raspy voice with a scent of alcohol in her mouth that he kissed with love and lust,but the leaves fall and so do her,and so do him.

She thought the devil was an angel
dressed in a daydream with a fairytale wedding and a fairytale ending; while she was gone
and and while she was still strong,
a storm with a raging thunder and a raging anger in him started to grow like a tree at the park beneath his feet; a tree that no one expected,a tree that no one felt and a tree that no one can feel.

He then began to cry with his hands in the stars,
starting to realize that what he did all this long was so wrong.He's sorry for any words and times that he never said and never there; he's sorry for not facing the consequences,and he's very sorry for thinking that she and him will end in a happy ending, will end with a 'happy ever after' like all the stories did,like all the people did.

She was confused,she was in a loose,she was in her bed and very scared.She was holding a dead bouquet of flowers from last week; a bouquet that had 99 roses that meant the days of their relationship and the days before he really decided to jump into his illusion and breathed into the final second before he took the razor and jumped into conclusion.

Now she understood,now she realized and now she knows that if they never met,if they never loved,if they never danced and if they never took a glance, things would've been better and he'll write her letters but that would be a knife-point to him because all he wanted was a guy, all he wanted was to be with his lovely bright sunshine.

Now it has been a year,it has been the darkest hours to her and it has been the saddest while everyone is living in a great and a wonderful lovely world while the sorrow and the arrow from the bow keeps stabbing her and and she always wish that her lucky stars will always be there and will always stand there with open arms that will always take care.
please love someone that you really really love and someone that you really really want.
Axel Jul 2019
Close the book,
let's read the next chapter
might as well rip
the previous chapters
but I hold on
not because the feeling is still here
but because there's still
a lot of chapters
and a lot of books on the shelf for me to read.
moving on..
Axel Aug 2021
your hum is still playing
in my apartment like you're the voice
of this living room.
I couldn't hold the walls
and I still am trying to;
guilt is what I taste every time
I try to let go— my lips
can't stop spewing our memories
on every candle I blow
because you're not here
and I'm not ready to let it go.
"his time stopped at 18"
Axel Aug 2019
As our eyes met,
I could feel the spark
like an electric met with electric
and a shock happened there.

I could feel the way you look
cause I was feeling the same thing
as you
right in the middle of a crowded room
but you only saw me
and I only saw you.

Our hearts glow like a sunrise
it shows,
and in that moment I felt like
your body is mine
and my body is yours.

But time passed by,
we looked into each others eyes
like it meant nothing,
nothing like the first time.
Nothing like before.
Axel Apr 2020
Love doesn't always
end like we planned;
it could be tragic,
sometimes messed up
but when you're with me,
I know that the future held our story
like the way we wrote,
like the way we thought.
and we are the authors to our story
Axel Sep 2020
I wiped my stained tears
and told myself
that maybe it's just a one time
but then again when I'm an angel they want to be the devil, but when I'm controlling, I'm the evil.

What's the point anymore of staying?
And what's the reason if there is none
if everybody's taking you for granted
while my voice stays flattened?

Falling to my bed,
losing all my words
and my metaphors ran with fears
to somewhere far away
where wishes exist and prayers stream like a waterfall everyday.
controlled
Axel Jan 2019
one,
swam with me
in the river
and the sea.

two,
broken glasses
and coming back
as a masterpiece.

three,
roses with sunflower
with a secret thorn garden
and I end up burnt
in my own desire.
a boy that was fed with a pretty little lies of love.
Axel Mar 2020
I just want to lay my head
on your chest
while you sing me a lullaby;
Let me win this game of chess,
don't want to hear anymore "goodbye".
Axel Dec 2020
keep your head above the water
but don't let the waves overpower.
Axel May 2019
big and wide the size of my heart is but you'd rather just to sit and hide between the trees rather than to come and search for me.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL I JUST WROTE HAHAHWHWHW AND IM GOING MF CRAZY N I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY AHAHAHHAH
Axel Jul 2019
Remember when we used to lay down on the field, looking up until we see clouds?
Then we create faces like we were a poet trying to say the words from our mouth but only laughter that came out.

Remember when we stayed up all night,
telling stories that were probably weren't real but we did it for our scaredy *** and couldn't sleep that night?
We were like directors trying to create some corny horror scenes from our head but our pants ended up filled with ***.

Now, when I look up to the clouds,
I see our childhood painted in pure white and I  paint them in my empty dusty canvas that I found  in my basement.
memories that'll never be erased
Axel Nov 2019
We stayed up all night
listening to our voices
talk softly under the dark
and I've never taught
that I'd fall in love
again, it's my luck.

So I hold your hands,
kiss your lips
and stare into you;
Now I'm ready to shout it out loud
"I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU".
Then, she kissed me slowly
and passionately
under this snowy weather;
Again, I fall in love with this girl,
it's insane.
another poem inspired by a Christmas movie
Axel Jun 2019
i know that the world is built for two,
but that doesn't mean that it should be you.
Axel Jul 2019
never find it funny
when my dad does it
but I pray to God that
he will never stop joking.
Cause by the time he's not here,
that jokes will mean everything.
Mr. Superman
Axel Dec 2020
your petals flew with the wind
chasing the birds that's flying
so you can taste the clouds on your skin
and I'll be down here waiting
hoping that you'd find your way back
even when we decided to sail
different route, my fleets going to south
and yours to north.

when one day we meet again,
I hope the war has ended
and the men are cheering of victory
even though the other side is burning
I hope our love will remain still;
even as a flower and a bee.
i hope we can still be friends :)
Axel Apr 2021
I know I'm one who isn't blunt
and I don't know how to learn feelings,
but I stayed up all night
trying to remember every part of your face
that I've studied.
Axel Dec 2019
I'm holding in my scream
when you hit me right there;
it makes my mind collapses into pieces
but you'll pick it right back up
when you told me to call your name out loud.
We'll keep quiet
Axel May 2019
Dear dad,
I'm sorry that I admire mom than you
and I'm sorry that I only could reached the roof when you asked for a moon.

As you sip your favourite cup of coffee that taste so bitter, you always ask how am I doing even though the coffee was bitter as your day.

As I was walking with you last night,
the moonlight shines right through your face
and I could see your brave face light up the night
because for the first time his son was walking with him, chatting and doing casual ****.

I'm sorry I couldn't be the best son, I'm sorry I couldn't be your best son but I promise you that I'll be your creamer to your coffee even though you prefer sugar in it.
my Superman <3
Axel Feb 2020
Dear sunset,
please don't go away
I just want you to stay
don't let it end today
cause I am so afraid.

Dear river,
please walk me by
and tell me "it's alright",
hold me when I cry
just hold me tight tonight.

Dear sunrise,
please don't be awake
cause I won't be await
for you to make me rain
and mourn tomorrow
like I did today.

Dear starlight,
please let me make a wish
so that she can filled with rich
of happiness and love
and be happy up above.
it is about me not wanting for today to end because I finally felt like I am worth living but also hell because I have to be apart from someone that I really love.
Axel Dec 2020
I don't know whether it's the lights
or your eyes
but my heart is snowing white.
baby it's cold outside
Axel Aug 2020
I can hear the moon is crying and the stars, they all are sobbing rain tonight; I can hear the sun is sighing in Cali with the clouds and was hugged by the sky with lightning getting angry every minute.

Why was I too blind?
Why was I too kind for someone that relies on me with nothing to be given? Never realized.
Why was I singing to the moon like a lullaby I try to sleep the thoughts of me loving you endlessly, ever so it was a beautiful flight.
Axel Jul 2021
every line that I say would be the words
of the man they wanted to see,
hung on the wall in a golden frame.
I was on the edge of the precipice—
but it was you I accidentally dragged with
because the minute we kiss,
I can feel the tip of my tongue
bleeding from the pain of a bliss.
Wilhelm
Axel Nov 2019
Hit me with your soul
I'll give my best to stay still
And the pain keep my eyes shut
But the pleasure ain't keeping my mouth shut

Promise me you'd hold me tight;
I'll bloom once the moon shines
Right through our body
And in that moment I'll stare at your shimmering eyes.

Let's not waste our times,
Run up to the stairs,
Lock the doors
And in that moment,
Baby I'm yours.
loving physically
Axel Jan 2019
black flowers and dress;
as i saw my reflection,
the water start to stir up.

as I saw my tears,
I know it's over
I know you're gone
but imagine if I can love you for so long;
imagine a world where we don't stuck in these thorns.
my friend's dad just passed away,and she's so strong, laughing, smiling, i don't know whether it's a real or a fake smile. i just wish i can be strong as her.
Axel Dec 2018
Love at first sight is real
Anyone or anybody can feel it
You know my lips can't say it
So I'll see you in my lovely dreams.

Missing you but I can't undo it,
I tried to save it but it's not my way
I love you but you're far away over there
And I know you're the one that keep promises tight in your hands,
You breathe like nobody else
You give me all the things you have
And that's why I'll keep you tight,
Tight in the little cage in my heart.

I want you to love me like nobody else
I want you to stay in my arms
I want you to slowly take my hands
Can you come take the chance?
Far Away is about me having a crush to a hot stranger hahaha I know,crazy right? I wrote Far Away as a song but I don't have a good voice so I converted it to a poetry. Hope u love it.
Axel Feb 2019
when I'm sad and down
I'll remember today,
February 5.

the day you left
the day I loved
and the day I cried a river
it's today
February 5.

you lift me up
made me feel new
made me feel better
made me feel good
and made me feel love
for the first time.

a caterpillar once said
on February 5,
'when I grow up,I wanna fly free,
I wanna feel confident'
but an iguana said
'keep on dreaming young boy'.

tomorrow,is a new start
tomorrow is a restart level
but I'll remember today,
because you showed me love
and showed me life
and showed me how sad
and chaotic a feeling can feel.

I'll remember today
I'll write this date on the stars
and when I grow up,
I'll remember how today got me messed up
this right moment,
this right 3.00 pm
on February 5.
i don't even know why i keep hurting myself,keep having my hopes high,and then end up crying and crying and crying in my bed.
Axel Jul 2020
Never been born to feel loved by someone and by someone not meaning my roots but a bee who'll go to the chosen flowers if it thinks that they're pretty enough to be touched, to be discovered by researches, to be plucked by humans, to be sell at the florist, to be the one who will heal upon a curse.

Maybe it's true that love doesn't exist.
I guess romance had run out of it's capacity for billions in this world as I remember that candles too has its finishing line as it run in its lane before it all goes blackout once again.
error
Axel Jan 2019
You're my greatest sin
and forever will.
You keep making me
run and
keep making me crave it,
again and again and again.
Axel Jun 2019
Go away!
I'm tired of turning and
tripping and laying
in my bed all night singing
every line to every broken songs
until I breathe nothing.

Go away!
Don't you ever turn back, go away!
If you dare to step out then
face the fact that you'll never
be able to turn back, go away!
**** all the points because you
made your choice
and I hope karma will land and bet
that I'll be over here with my wine
dancing around the sand with my girlfriend.
goodbye
Axel Mar 2021
good things don't last forever,
they come and go within a second;
so hold them close
while the seat is taken
before they say "see you never".
make it worth while you still can.
Axel May 2019
Happy ending is when the prince kisses the princess
Happy ending is when the bride is laughing with her groom
Happy ending is when people find love in a small room

But a happy ending to me is when I write poetry in a small room or under the trees and maybe sometimes in the bathroom.
Happy ending can be infinity
Happy ending can be a story
But my happy ending is myself and my poetry.
I found love in the words I write and I found love in the words I say
Axel Feb 2019
I really want to make you happy
I really want to make you smile
But the universe isn't with me
But the tables are turning faster
And the sky is falling onto my shoulder

Be happy
Try to be happy at least
It's your special day
It's your memorable day
Even if the stars aren't there tonight
Even if the moon ain't shining bright
Be happy

I would love to sing it to you
I would love to sleep under the trees with you
I would love to wish you a happy birthday
But why would I?
I'm just a shadow in your life
I'm just a Tinkerbell who's in love with Peter
I'm just a person who lives in the bitter.
I shouldn't write this **** because I'm moving on,but I can't help to see u sad on your own bday. well happy bday from this no one.
love,azfar
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