im lying here in bed wondering when we will meet again, and angry that i trusted you with words no one else has read.
you took my firsts- my words and touches, and i assumed you would be my last, but you took them and never looked back.
i guess that's why i haven't written on paper since.
His words were leavened with grace
As He shared His last mortal meal.
If you listened with care
His voice maybe cracked with grief
Even while His hands were laced with peace
As He broke the crust
Releasing the warmth into the chatter
He shared with His friends.
And if you watched closely
His hands perhaps shook a little
As He poured out His full bodied wine
Intense in its dark flavour
Infused with fragrance
As if ripe for an altared offering.
And if you looked into His face
You might have seen a sheen
In the firelight
Over the determination
To see this through
To the last.
Those words sting harder than bee's
Their honey is bitter sweet.
The lid has embeded years of pain
Those voices can be heard
inside of the jar.
There's not enough room to contain
no-one can hear them
They all lie on the suface of false hopes.
They are bruised broken
No-one can place these broken pieces together .
Because They are beyond repair.
As the moon rises
On the darkness of sorrow
And iron tastes past on the tongue
On the silver sphere
When dry leaves ignite in flame
That spurs the image of gods
My raven cawing sadly
On the death of the nightingale
Dancing, though the seed is rotten
Ambition cannot bloom now
The daffodils are shriveled
Drought and fear drying the roots
I deserve no reward for life
Might I have watched the flames
When my garden was set ablaze?
I'm not walking away. I know there are lots of things we needed to fix, to consider our priorities. I am what i am and i thank you for choosing and loving me the best of you can. Thank you for not giving up on me yet.
I can still hold on to your promises. Years from now, you will always be the person i want to spend my life with. Just hold on. Hold on tight.
The storm will come our way, the temptation will break us apart but i will not falter. I will stay and love you. I will be there when you need me.
Babe, give me reasons not to look away towards your direction.
Understand my flaws and insecurities.
Scatter your rays of sun to my lonely heart that soon will consume with shadows of doubts and jealousy.
Reach for my shivering hand.
The warmth of your soft touch will lead me back to you again.
I can forgive you if you let me show you my trust again.
I can accept all your worries and hatred.
I can accept your overflowing love you once had to me.
I can love you endlessly babe.
Why did we end up strangers?
Why did you give up on us?
Why did you turn your pages so fast and erase me on every chapter of your story.
Babe, when you feel like trying again.
Reach for my hand
I will take you back with me wholeheartedly.
Full of love and sincerity.
Just don't leave me hanging.
Don't leave me with a big question mark on my heart.
Don't let me hate myself for not being good enough to you.
Please do not send me to the darkness.
Let your light shine on me.
I will tell you right now.
My mind has gone somewhere else.
Every since you told me you cared,
but then I saw you caring for another girl the same way.
My life flashed before me.
My whole body went numb every memory flashed back and out of my head.
I stand there staring at once was mine and is now on my counter in some other girl that has lost her mind as well.
Maybe I am just a past time.
I ran as fast as I could out of there.
Your voice was just scratching at me,
begging me to listen but I wouldn't I saw it all.
Nothing could be done to fix it,
my mind has gone somewhere else
every night I go to sleep.
Right when I close my eyes
All I see is that day.
You took my heart right out of my chest
You told me you loved me.
Could see no one else but us.
But you seemed to find your self getting bored of me.
Days go on house is quieter everyday
The back door opens later and later in the night.
You sneaking in
Saying "it was a long night at work"
But we all know it was a long night with another girl.
A girl who can handle it who can put a smile on your face more than I can
Maybe more than I ever had
Will I ever be good for you?
That day was the day I lost my mind
My mind is still here.
I stay humble, I work hard, I don't complain.
I do my absolute best. I take the worse and give people the best. Even when I haven't slept I'm happy to do anything for anyone. Then it happens. I'm forgotten, alone to be used by any and all. I want to be a common thought, something that happens right away, at what cost do I have to give to receive it? I've followed my own path but have picked up so many strays that do not replenish what they use. I am forgotten forever to be abused.
You watched the tears roll down my face
Did nothing but laugh into my pain
I never asked for much but you wished for everything
How do you sleep?
You were never the man who smiled when I laughed
You faked every hug and every promise
You watched me fall and did nothing but push me further
How do you sleep?
You didn't see I was scared
You didn't care that I was scared
Scared Of You
How could you call yourself a father?
I've written a thousand ways I'll miss you
when we no longer speak and
that time has come
cause you don't talk to me late at night
you don't send me songs I've already heard and
I don't play along
I don't listen to your music
I don't dance to your music and I don't dance with you
I still miss laughing with you and
the last time I saw you felt like we were starting over
but maybe we were just saying goodbye
Now I'm six hours ahead and I'm
pretty sure you're still taking her to bed
So now is goodbye, this is not see you later
This is not me waiting for you
This is me learning not to reach for
something that shouldn't be here
I imagined you next to me for a thousand years
but maybe our time together, comfortably laughing
was only meant to be fleeting
maybe your free spirit was only meant to leave
I'll never know why you
entered my life like a hurricane
and left me deserted
never know if you ever loved me
never know if you were lying
or are as confused as you seem
our goodbye is likely forever
you built walls and left them
running to the mountains searching for
yourself inside someone else
its cliche and I always thought you were unique
but maybe you're just like the rest
just a lost boy running from reality
I ought to stop writing bout you
and yearning for us to begin again
cause you're a lost boy and
my messages will never reach you
Wanna say hello,
want you to say hello
want you to reach out but I
gotta say goodbye
goodbye to your old car
to your plain bagels and adidas sneakers
goodbye to your black dog, and kind parents
goodbye to laying on the couch
to driving through the streets late at night
goodbye to tequila shots and dancing
to laughing and missing trains
to who we were and will never be
hello to the future
goodbye my love