imperfectstranger: Poems

Mar 2019 · 1.3k

Thanks

imperfectstranger Mar 2019

Thanks

I thank him everyday
For him walking away

#alone #thanks #thankyou #walkaway

Feb 2019 · 15.4k

Haunting

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Haunting

Words don’t hurt
They haunt

#haunt #hurt #words #talk #rumors #dark

Feb 2019 · 393

Imperfections

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Imperfections

My mirror only shows me
My imperfections
Soon enough
My imperfections become all I see

#imperfections #imperfect #reflection #flaws #mirror

Feb 2019 · 308

High Hopes

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

High Hopes

Never get your hopes too high up
Or they might crash and burn

#hopes #hope #expectations #reality #crash #burn #highhopes

Feb 2019 · 262

Permanent Sleep

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Permanent Sleep

I wish I could fall asleep and never wake up
I’ve been getting closer and closer to that goal by the day
No one has noticed my lack of mental turn-up
Forever and ever in bed I’ll lay

#sleep #tired #depression #depressed #alone

Feb 2019 · 307

Haiku: Crushed

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Haiku: Crushed

I feel so heavy
My mind, body, and soul too
Constantly crushed

#heavy #crushed #lacking

Feb 2019 · 522

Empty

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Empty

My mind void
My heart hollow
My stomach pitted

#anxiety #empty #alone #anxious #void #hollow #pitted

Feb 2019 · 653

Little Copper Penny

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Little Copper Penny

A little copper penny
Lying alone on the sidewalk

Rained on, stepped on, walked right by

No one cares about a penny
What could it possibly buy?

#copper #penny #alone #stuck

Feb 2019 · 831

Impossible

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Impossible

I don’t think
You fully understand
The things I go through
You can’t
It’s impossible
Please don’t say
that you do

I don’t think
You can comprehend
The feelings I’m feeling
You can’t
It’s impossible
Please don’t say
That you do

I don’t think
You can fathom
The darkness in my mind
You can’t
It’s impossible
Please don’t say
That you do

I don’t think
You can imagine
The depth of my despair
You can’t
It’s impossible
Please don’t say
You wish you could

#impossible #understand #misunderstood #alone #unimaginable #in #fathomable #uncomprehendable

Feb 2019 · 1.9k

Haiku: Play Satan

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Haiku: Play Satan

My conscience likes to
play Satan all the **** time
Sadly I **** at this game

#depressed #depression #play #game #**** #bad #satan #devil #whisper #evil

Feb 2019 · 226

Hard

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Hard

If only she could be 'that girl'

The one that smiled effortlessly
and could act accordingly

To bad it's not that easy

#hard #happy #smile #easy

Feb 2019 · 326

Writers Block (2)

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Writers Block (2)

My writers block
Feels less like a conquerable block
And more
Like an impossible maze

#writersblock

Feb 2019 · 789

Let Go

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Let Go

Letting go
is the hardest way to flow,

but sometimes,

it has to be done
in order to move on

#letgo #moveon #keepgoing

Feb 2019 · 310

Unexpected

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Unexpected

The most popular
are
The least expected

surprising how things work, right?

#unexpected #surprising

Feb 2019 · 2.0k

Writers Block (1)

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Writers Block (1)

I never understood what
‘writers block’ was, until now:

The complete derailing
of your train of thought

#writersblock #ataloss

Feb 2019 · 394

Faith

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

Faith

Faith
needs
to be
nurtured
and
cared for
so it
doesn’t
run
away

#lossoffaith #faith #gone #runaway #run

Feb 2019 · 173

She Feels so Small...

imperfectstranger Feb 2019

She Feels so Small...

Everyone thinks she’s perfect
Like everything’s presented to her on a golden tray
But did no one notice
The slits on her wrists the other day?
Covered in white plaster,
With red peeking through
No one sees the demons
Pushing her closer and closer too
And the boulders on her shoulders
Invisible to the world,
Make her a little smaller

#depressed #alone #small #depression

Jan 2019 · 405

Age

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Age

If you knew my age
would you turn tail and run away?
Say I'm too young to understand
These feelings and god's greater plan?

Would you say I'm being over-dramatic
or a little bit selfish?
That it's not my right to decide my own feelings and choices?
That I should stop being so negative and start to cherish?
Maybe I should just sit back and listen to the voices

In my ear
Down my neck
In my business
Over my shoulder

Not the ones in my head,
Not my conscience that is me and belongs to me

No, I have to live the way everyone else expects me to...

#expectations #dramatic #selfish #tooyoung #young #negative #path

Jan 2019 · 474

Life Manual

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Life Manual

Where is the manual on life?
Is there one I wasn't informed of?
That says you have to be a certain way?

That you have to be
Perfect?
Normal?
The same?

Because I didn't get one

#perfection #normality #sameness #perfect #normal #same #weird #imperfections #imperfect #life

Jan 2019 · 163

No one

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

No one

I've been told
What to do
For most of my life
But now
When I want
Someone to
When I need
Someone to

No one is there

#alone

Jan 2019 · 323

Which do you choose?

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Which do you choose?

Ignorance is bliss

But

Intelligence in essential

#ignorance #intelligence #choose #bliss #essential

Jan 2019 · 226

Tears (2)

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Tears (2)

Everything is blurry
Not because of my lack of glasses
But because of my surplus of tears

#tears #cry #crying #blurry

Jan 2019 · 312

Where to?

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Where to?

Many people
Think
I’m going somewhere
But
Trust me
I’m going
Absolutely
Nowhere

#expectations #life

Jan 2019 · 218

What to do...

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

What to do...

I want to
But then I don't
I don't want to
But then I do

#indecisive #indecision

Jan 2019 · 580

What is OK?

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

What is OK?

'Is everything ok?'

What is ok?

'Haven't killed myself yet, have I?'

#depression #ok #fine #exasperated #mentalissues

Jan 2019 · 166

Music (2)

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Music (2)

The lyrics make me FEEL something
They tell me that there still might be a way back
That I’m going to be ok
But in a way no person can say

There are no words to the indescribable feeling I get when I listen to music
I feel clear headed
I feel open in every way
I feel like there is still something to live for again
That maybe I’m not alone today
That maybe I’m strong enough to fight these battles inside my head for just one more day

#music #songs #lyrics #fight #depression

Jan 2019 · 713

Am I Joking?

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Am I Joking?

‘Please **** me’
Laughing surrounds the supposed joke.
Little do they know,
It was less of a joke and more of a plea

#depression #killme #depressed #joking #joke #plea

Jan 2019 · 833

Life

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Life

The uncertainty of life
Is both a curse and blessing
You choose which it is

#uncertainty #clueless #blessed #cursed #choose

Jan 2019 · 397

Death is Real

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Death is Real

Realize
Realize that there is something called death
Death, meaning the end to all the insane madness of the world
Whether it’s a new beginning
Or the train’s last stop
Know that it happens all the time
It’s inevitable
Death roams around with no leash
But don’t fret too much
It’s not worth the pain of anxiety
Live a little

#death #inevitable #unstoppable

Jan 2019 · 338

Happy?

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Happy?

Someone once asked me
what I wanted in life
I said, "To be happy,"
They asked, "Aren't you already happy?"
and I replied, "If only you knew,"

#happiness #problems #mask #happy

Jan 2019 · 503

Scarred

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Scarred

I’ve been scarred from head to toe so many times, it’s impossible to tell the old me from my recent history

My mind scarred from disease
                                       My feet from anxiety
My hands from guilt
                         My stomach from impurities

My heart scarred from betrayal, never to trust again
My ears from stupidity that never fails to turn on me

                                   My face from insomnia
My arms from inability
                                             My gut from fear
My shoulders from loneliness
                                         My fists from fights
My eyes from violence
                                     My knees from failure
My bones from pain
                              My ankles from weakness
My reputation from mistakes

And my soul from these dark clouds that refuse to fade...

#depression #anxiety #insomnia #loneliness #guilt #mistakes #inability #weakness #messedup #violence

Jan 2019 · 220

Limited Freedom

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Limited Freedom

I just want to be a normal teen
With the ability to do and say as I please
To not have to be dragged by the sleeve
To and from places I never wanted to be

#teen #normality #loss

Jan 2019 · 290

Monsters Under my Bed

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Monsters Under my Bed

This armor finally solidifies in its place
To protect me from the demons that come to play

I was told monsters only come out at night
But here they are, ridding my world of any light

They surround me, push me into a chasm so dark, it hurts my eyes,
and tie me So there’s no escape

Help me
Help me please

No armor or weapon can stop these beasts

#haunted #monsters #demons #dark #trapped #alone

Jan 2019 · 246

I Feel This Way

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

I Feel This Way

They say I have no right to feel the way I do,

But guess what?

I do, and there’s nothing you can do to change that...

Jan 2019 · 166

Haiku: Pretty Lies

imperfectstranger Jan 2019

Haiku: Pretty Lies

Too many people
Tell you what you want to hear
And not what they think

#lie #lies #truth

Dec 2018 · 170

Every Night…

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Every Night…

I woke up crying and scared again
I don’t remember what happened though
I need someone to hold me, but he’s not there

There is no ‘he’ for me
Never has been

Scared and alone in the darkness of my room
I’ve never needed anyone to just hold me more than I do right now…

#nightmares

Dec 2018 · 2.0k

Eye on the Ball

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Eye on the Ball

Eyes on the ball
Sweat falls to the ground
Be ready to move
In my own little world, there is no sound

But all around
are people
screaming
screeching
cheering

The adrenaline spikes through my blood
Stronger than it ever does

All of this
fuels me
energizes me
readies me
for the game

This is why I play
This is why I play

Meanwhile, all eyes are on the ball…

#soccer #volleyball #basketball #games #sports #athlete #athletes

Dec 2018 · 881

Full yet empty

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Full yet empty

In a room full of people

I’ve never felt more alone

All the lousy chatter

Never seemed so quiet

My insides full of sorrow

Yet a deep empty pit dominates my soul

#sorrow #alone #pit

Dec 2018 · 411

Darkness

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Darkness

A darkness so vast and frightening
So consuming and suffocating
It terrifies me

#dark #scared #alone #darkness

Dec 2018 · 730

Frustrate

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Frustrate

I never fully get a break
From trying to escape

I let loose with my words
But sometimes it never works

I’m never not alone
There’s no place called home

All this pent up frustration
means there’s no vacation
From all these feelings

#frustration #frustrating #alone #feels #feeling #escape

Dec 2018 · 429

Music (1)

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Music (1)

Rediscovering myself in music
That isn't mine
But is me

#music #me #rediscovering

Dec 2018 · 242

You

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

You

I can’t sleep
I can’t eat
I can’t function
As thoughts of you cloud my head like a car windshield driving through a whiteout blizzard
They are thoughts of you
The words you’ve said
The sound of your voice
The way you look
They are all right there
But at the same time
Too far away to focus
I’m left staring at the ceiling for hours
Wondering if you’re doing the same

#you #foggy #focus

Dec 2018 · 316

We are all People

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

We are all People

Some people see ages
Some see religions
Some see skin color
But can everyone stop to see people
Not ages
Not religions
Not colors

People

People who are equal
People who have rights
Who have family and friends
And feelings
And souls
Can we stop for a second to see that we are all the same

People

We are all people

#equality #people #humans #equal #equals #same

Dec 2018 · 333

All Alone

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

All Alone

No one wants to find me
No one’s interested in my hurt
All alone in the darkness
No one to heal the burn

No one wants to hear about my troubles
Or wash away the pain
All alone in my darkness
No one to shine light or concern

#alone #hurt #lonely #pain

Dec 2018 · 666

Talk

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Talk

Talk

That’s all it ever is

Talk

Do you really trust the words

Talk

That are thrown like knives

Talk

Lies, insults, and blames

Talk

That hurt more than words should

Talk

But the truth comes and no one listens

Talk

When the complements are said, that are considered criticism

Talk

That’s all it is…

#truth #talk #understand #blame #lies #criticism

Dec 2018 · 238

Haiku: Who am I

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Haiku: Who am I

Who am I today?
Am I who I want to be?
When have I mattered?

#lost #depressed #alone #depression

Dec 2018 · 177

Pain

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Pain

A throb
A burn
An ache
A stab
A slice
A squeeze
An emptiness
A hollowness

Always in my head
Throughout my body
In my scars
In my heart
In my soul
In my being

The pain is everywhere

But I'm also numb
So numb it hurts

"Pain demands to be felt,"
~The fault in our stars, John Green

#pain #depression #numb #depressed #hurting #hurt

Dec 2018 · 284

Haiku: Red Water

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Haiku: Red Water

Sitting in a tub
Full of red water and tears
Waiting to see stars

#depression #depressed #suicide #stars

Dec 2018 · 985

Headache

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Headache

My head hurts
Stop you'll only make it worse

Medicine and time will help
I don't want something from the shelf

I don't want to be an experiment
I don't want to be different

So I hide it from the world
But I just want to be heard

These thoughts in my head
Won't let me go to bed

I feel numb
Happiness never comes

My thoughts are jumbled
My life starts to crumble

#depression #depressed #headache #numb

Dec 2018 · 1.0k

Not as it Seems

imperfectstranger Dec 2018

Not as it Seems

I'm not where I want to be,
and I'm anything but happy

but no one sees

"You're perfect," "You're smart,"
I am anything but art

but no one sees

I'm lonely and hurt
I'm just lying on the turf

but no one sees

my world of broken dreams
nothing is what it seems

#nothing #depression #depressed #alone